Whither Firsts?

(Image from here.)

Wow, it just occurred to me that I have no real idea where I got the idea of a show about firsts.  But I do know that, when I was a kid & learning about ordinal numbers, I was almost taught "first" incorrectly because of a smart-ass kid two years older than I was.

His name was Todd & he lived in our apartment complex.  We were learning about ordinal numbers - I'm not sure they used that word, but whatever - & we were taught that, except for one, two, & three, you formed an ordinal by adding a -th to the end - you know, four becomes fourth, five becomes fifth, thirty becomes thirtieth, million becomes millionth.  The exceptions were first, second, & third.

This kid managed to convince me - I was little, I probably didn't need much convincing - that it was perfectly all right - in fact it was what they would teach us later, because it was proper English - to say oneth, twoth, threeth.  I took some delight in knowing something as such a tender age that only adults - proper adults - knew.  But I was delighted to a fault - I wanted to show it off.

& the only person I knew who'd truly "get" it was my teacher*, so I told her.  & she said, "That's wrong.  Whoever told you that was wrong."

Knowing that Todd was bigger, older, & probably likely to hit me, I never told him that his trick didn't work.  & he fucked with us constantly, so he didn't mention it again.

Perhaps I should dedicate this week's show to Todd, wherever he might be (he's probably still living in Garland, Texas).  It's on from 8-10pm central, 9-11pm eastern, on 93.9 fm in Lexington & online everywhere at Lexington community radio dot org.  Be the first to listen!  But there's no first prize for doing so.

* Surprisingly, I never thought to ask my older siblings.  I understand not mentioning it to my mother - she's German, English is her second language, I couldn't be sure she'd know the "proper" way to speak.