Halloween Week 2017: Monsters!

(Original image here.)

Halloween week continues with another oldie but moldy Halloween show, this one from way back in 2006, a show about monsters.  (I don't think I could've come up with an entire show about Frankenstein, so this was my work-around.)  I will mention that, should you choose to listen, that the tape deck at the radio station was not the finest around.  It kind of makes my voice a bit higher than it actually is (although I know I can be a little goofy & excited on the air).  Or maybe I really sounded like that then?  I dunno, I barely listened to the first airbreak, although it's fun to hear Erin Hannan on the show, she was my apprentice in those distant days.  We enjoyed chatting on the air I think.

The show is now on the brand new Halloween on Self Help Radio page.  Same rules apply for password & stuff.  It's ninety minutes long, the show is in two parts, & what's in each part is below.  (I think I left out a song, probably because I forgot to turn the cassette tape over.  Oops!)  (It's really not one of my best shows.)

As I noticed, the page has all my recent Halloween shows, back to 2010 - & tomorrow I guess I'll be putting up the show from 2007?  Maybe?

Warning!  Thar be monsters here!

(part one)

"Monsters!" CJ Buchanan from _Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!_
"Jaws Theme" Allan Parker from _Halloween Big Screen Thrillers_
"Monster" The Automatic from _Not Accepted Anywhere_
"The Attack Of The Giant Ants" Blondie from _Blondie_
"El Monstruo" Los Shains from _Teenage Shutdown Vol. 1: Jump, Jive & Harmonize_

"Monster Mash" Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band from _Cornology_
"King Kong" Big T. Tyler from _Loud Fast & Out Of Control_
"Eaten By The Monster Of Love" Sparks from _Angst In My Pants_
"Scary Monsters & Super Creeps" David Bowie from _Scary Monsters & Super Creeps_

(part two)

"She Loves Monsters" Bartlebees from _Urban Folk Legends_
"Monsters" Boy Least Likely To from _The Best Party Ever_
"New Monster Avenue" Mountain Goats from _Get Lonely_
"Monster" Ramonalisas from _Monster_

"Blob" Five Blobs from _They Came From Outer Space: The Alien Songbook_
"Bride Of Frankenstein" Toy Love from _Toy Love_
"Le Monster" My Favorite from _The Happiest Days Of Our Lives_
"The Monster (Oh Qu'il Est Vilain)" Stereo Total from _Fields & Streams_

"Monster Island" Dickies from _Second Coming_
"Bigfoot" Legendary Jim Ruiz Group from _Sniff_

Halloween Week 2017: Vampires!

(Original image here.)

Hey!  As a trick &/or a treat, I've dug up a very old show - a Self Help Radio from 2005 (so, twelve years ago) - a Halloween episode about vampires, which I have placed on a brand new Halloween page: Halloween on Self Help Radio dot net!

Now, I haven't listened to this show in many years - if ever.  I remember gathering the songs - it was fun to find so many songs about vampires - but I have no memory of the show, & I barely made it through the first airbreak, in which I am pretty low energy.  But it might be fun to hear an old episode of Self Help Radio & especially to have a lot of (let's face it) campy tunes for Halloween.

Especially because there's a song called "Dracula Gary."  That's a treat.

Again, the show is on the new Halloween on Self Help Radio page.  Same rules apply for password & stuff.  It's two hours long, so the show is in two parts, & what's in each part is below.

& yeah, the page has all my recent Halloween shows, back to 2010 - & in the next few days I'll try to put up all my old Halloween shows from 2005 on.  (Pre-2005 shows are on cassette & not digitized, I'm sorry.)

I hope you enjoy.

(part one)

"The Vampire Sleeps" Boris Karloff _Tales Of The Frightened Vol.II_
"Night Of The Vampire" Moontrekkers _It's Hard To Believe: The Amazing World Of Joe Meek_
"In The Vampire's Lair" Al Zanino _The Al Stan Masters: Best Of Reading's Oldies_
"Transylvania Twist" Bobby 'Boris' Pickett & The Crypt-Kickers _The Original Monster Mash_
"Bela Be Good" Ghouls _Dracula's Deuce_

"Vampire's Ball" Mann Drake _Vampire's Ball_
"Dracula's Castle" Mike Sarne _Come Outside With Mike Sarne: The Definitive Collection Singles_
"Dinner With Drac" Zacherle _Dead Man's Ball_
"The Vampire" Archie King _Doo Wop Halloween_
"I Want To Bite Your Hand" Gene Moss _Dracula's Greatest Hits_
"Dracula's Deuce" Freddy Fortune & The 4 Gone Conclusions _Monster Party 2000_

"Vampira" Bobby Bare _Horror Hop_
"Night Of The Vampire" Roky Erickson & The Aliens _The Evil One_
"Dracula Gary" Centimeters _The Centimeters Present The Facts Of Destiny_
"My Daddy Is A Vampire" Meteors _Rockabilly Psychosis & The Garage Disease_

(part two)

"Here Come The Vampires" Bunnygrunt _Jen-Fi_
"I Bleed" Pixies _Doolittle_
"Bela Lugosi's Dead" Bauhaus _The Singles_

"Laugh In A Grave" MrHamburger _Sounds For The Active Dead_
"Release The Bats" Birthday Party _The John Peel Sessions_
"I'm A Vampire" Future Bible Heroes _Eternal Youth_
"Dracula" Gorillaz _G-Sides_
"Vampire" Devon Irons _Arkology Vol. 1: Dub Organizer_

"Vampire Girl" Jonathan Richman _You Must Ask The Heart_
"Baby Vampire Made Me" Helium _Pirate Prude_

Self Help Radio 102517: Halloween 2017 - Black Cats!

(Original image by Ryan Conner, found here.)

Halloween is not even here & I've already scared my own pants off.  Black cats!  What was I thinking?  Sure, I live with one, but last night I could've sworn that I glanced out the window & saw a sea of yellow eyes!  If you never hear from me again after today, you may find me in the nearest litter box.  Evil fiends!

In addition to many songs that apparently have the power to summon the most devilish of cats, this Halloween show featured a panel discussion about the reputation of black cats, a conversation with a warlock, Allen Shariaty, who reveals secrets of the black cat, & a discussion with my spiritual mentor, the Rev. Dr. Howard Gently, about spiritual traditions involving the black cat.  & if that wasn't too much, Lexington singer/songwriter Jenny Adkins wrote a song just for the show!  Unlike most Self Help Radio episodes, this one appears to be more treat than trick!

You can listen to the show now at the Self Help Radio website.  To do so, you'll need a password & a username - those are available on the page.  The show is two hours long, divided into two hour-long files.  What's in those files (including the interviews) is below.

This show is not for the faint of heart!  Listen if you dare!

(part one)

"Never Kick A Black Cat" Boris Karloff _Tales Of The Frightened, Vol 2_
"Black Cat" Skinned Teen _Bazooka Smooth!_
"Black Cat (Cross My Path Today)" Lonnie Donegan _The Singles Anthology 1955-1967_

"Black Cat (I Don't Wanna Be Unlucky No More)" Jenny Adkins _Unlucky Charms_
"Black Cat Hoot Owl Blues" Ma Rainey _The Rise & Fall Of Paramount Records, Vol. 2 (1928-1932)_
"The Black Cat (Excerpt 1)" Diamanda Galás _Closed On Account Of Rabies: Tales Of Edgar Allan Poe_
"Black Cat" Tommy Collins _Black Cat Gonna Shake This Shack Tonight_
"Catblack (The Wizard's Hat)" Tyrannosaurus Rex _Unicorn_

interview with warlock Allen Shariaty

"Black Cat Moan" Clara Smith _Complete Recorded Works In Chronological Order, Vol. 5 (1927-1929)_
"Old Black Cat" Ian Anderson _Rupi's Dance_
"Black Cat" Reverend & The Makers _Death Of A King_
"Black Cat Boogie" The Black Crabs _13 Times_

"Black Cat" Broadcast _Tender Buttons_
"The Black Cat" UK Decay _The Black 45 EP_

(part two)

"Black Cat Blues" The Beau Gentry _If You're Ready! The Best Of Dunwich Records, Vol. 2_
"Black Cat Blues" John Lee Hooker _Graveyard Blues_
"Black Cat" Ohio Players _Ecstasy_

panel discussion about black cats

"Black Cat" Willie Lane _Rural Blues, Vol. 1 1934-1956_
"Black Cat" David Ceredig-Evans & Rebecca Wright _KidsSongs_
"The Black Cat (Excerpt 2)" Diamanda Galás _Closed On Account Of Rabies: Tales Of Edgar Allan Poe_
"Thirteen Black Cats" Nan Wynn _Thirteen Black Cats_
"Black Cat" Ziggy Marley _Love Is My Religion_

interview with spiritual mentor Rev Dr Howard Gently

"Mean Black Cat Blues" Charley Patton _Complete Recorded Works In Chronological Order, Vol. 1 (14 June 1929 To Late November/Early December 1929)_
"Old Black Cat Blues (Jinx Blues)" Kokomo Arnold _Vol. 1 : Bad Luck Blues 1934-1938_
"Black Cat Blues (Take 2)" Memphis Minnie _Queen Of The Country Blues: All the Published Sides 1929-37_
"I Ain't Superstitious" Willie Dixon _I Am The Blues_

"Black Cat" Psychic TV _Trip Reset_

Whither Black Cats (Self Help Radio Halloween 2017)?

(Image from here - it's an interesting article, too.)

Every year Self Help Radio celebrates the spookiest of holidays (well, after Easter) with a special episode focusing on some creepy aspect of the event.  We've had shows about ghosts & vampires, about zombies & werewolves, about witches & mummies & monsters.  Scary places weren't neglected, either - there have been shows about haunted houses, graveyards, even hell.  Some terrifying concepts, too, have come under the show's scrutiny: nightmares & death have frightened a radio listener before.  (Let's not talk about the show about clowns, okay?)

This year, we will hear songs & discussion about the domesticated pet from hell, the black cat.  Oh sure, they're cute, they're sweet, they're cuddly & friendly, but what if they're really witches in disguise?  What if they're like Satan's spy cameras?  What if at night they're slowly sucking your soul out of your body & giving you toxoplasmosis instead?  These are all things that, while probably not possible, might freak you out if you're reading this while high.  Good lord, why are you reading this blog while high?  There are so many other cool things you could be doing!

Come join us tonight as we expose the evil black cat for the devilspawn it is!  Self Help Radio's spooky Halloween show is on from 9-11pm eastern, 8-10pm central, on 93.9 fm WLXU in haunted Lexington, & online at Lexington Community Radio dot org, which is probably possessed by the souls of deejays long forgotten.

& remember - if Self Help Radio crosses your path, it's bad luck all the rest of the week!

Preface To Halloween 2017 - Black Cats: Cats Are Just Too Fucking Cool

Oh yeah, I'm bad ass.

That image above is from an article I think I'll read from tomorrow night with the headline Cats Domesticated Themselves, DNA Evidence Shows.

Whoa.

The truth is, I was a cat person before I was a dog person, & the reason is that they're cool as fuck.  They love you when & if they're in the mood.  The rest of the time they're doing their own thing.

So tomorrow I'm going to be talking smack about black cats, about how they're bad luck, they work with witches & devils, etc.  But all the while I'll be secretly envying them.

Because while most of us are as emotionally sloppy as dogs, precious few of us can be as cosmically cool as a cat.  That's why we vilify them!

Hope they can forgive me!

My Black Cat

The show this week is a Halloween show, a show about black cats.  My mother believes that black cats are bad omens, & more than once in our childhood did she make us go a different direction because a black cat crossed her path.  This is true.

She's very old now, & forgetful, & she was talking one day about how scared she was of black cats, & she asked me, "Do you think it's bad luck for a black cat to cross your path?"

My reply was, "If so, I'm the unluckiest person alive, because a black cat crosses my path literally all day long when I am at home."

The truth is, I am lucky to have a black cat at home.  I've talked about him over & over, but I thought, in honor of today's show, I'd share a few more pictures of my wonderful black cat.

His name is Bolan.  Here he is as a kitten, over ten years ago, sleeping with Ringo:

Here he is as a kitten with Winston, whom he is a little bit bigger than now:

Here he is with his brother George, & if you met him, you'd realize he was raised by dogs:

Here he is with the mother who wanted him, whom he loves very much:

He is a rather large cat:

& sometimes he has trouble relaxing, his life is so stressful:

So we're lucky that, a couple of years after we adopted him, we rescued the love of his life, Bronte:

So, if you're scared of black cats, this week's show might be terrifying for you.  But at our house, Bolan will be the most brazen of cats, & will gladly come to meet you if you come over.  He might also eat your hair.  It's a thing.  We can't figure it out.

Dream Vacation

This week's show is about black cats, who are vilified as bad omens & unlucky - & sometimes downright evil - among the superstitious, but I own a black cat & he's sweet as can be.

I've been on the lookout for great black cat stories & today I stumbled onto this one (from which the above picture is taken):

Adventurous Man Quits His Job to Travel Australia in a Campervan With a Beautiful Black Cat By His Side

My black cat Bolan is not fond of being in moving vehicles but I wouldn't mind traveling the country with my animals.  It's very true, life is better with black cats around!