(Portland is supportive)
Some people are kind. Some people are kind & clear-sighted. Some people are kind & pragmatic. I confess that I think I am kind but I am neither pragmatic nor clear-sighted.
Oh damn I am judgmental. I approach things after the judgment. That can be so harmful. I will do almost anything for a friend (my wife has some stories she finds infuriating) but it doesn't mean I won't think that it's not necessarily the best thing I can do.
This is my way of saying I need to learn how to be supportive without the judgment. I have a friend who is amazing in this manner. I asked that person's advice today. It was so simple & it hadn't occurred to me. It bypassed so much judgmental bullshit.
Once upon a time, I found myself presenting in front of a group of people an orientation for one of the radio stations at which I volunteered. It was entirely by accident. We hadn't planned who would talk first. So I got up & talked & I said what I believed: that community radio is a marvel, a sacred space (in the most secular definition of sacred). Media is depressing & sad, it's anonymous, even public radio sounds the same from show to show, but the idea that you can come to a community radio station & do the show you want to do - that anyone could do that - that's as precious a belief as I can hold.
Oh damn I am judgmental. I approach things after the judgment. That can be so harmful. I will do almost anything for a friend (my wife has some stories she finds infuriating) but it doesn't mean I won't think that it's not necessarily the best thing I can do.
This is my way of saying I need to learn how to be supportive without the judgment. I have a friend who is amazing in this manner. I asked that person's advice today. It was so simple & it hadn't occurred to me. It bypassed so much judgmental bullshit.
Once upon a time, I found myself presenting in front of a group of people an orientation for one of the radio stations at which I volunteered. It was entirely by accident. We hadn't planned who would talk first. So I got up & talked & I said what I believed: that community radio is a marvel, a sacred space (in the most secular definition of sacred). Media is depressing & sad, it's anonymous, even public radio sounds the same from show to show, but the idea that you can come to a community radio station & do the show you want to do - that anyone could do that - that's as precious a belief as I can hold.
A person from the station afterwards came up to me & said, "You're so critical of so many shows, it was amazing to hear you talk about how great the station is." & I thought, "It's because I may not like the shows but I love the idea of community radio. I will fight for this station & all community radio stations."
My conversation today suggested I focus less on the subtle general criticism & more on the idea. In that way it might be inspiring. In that way it might be more helpful.
My conversation today suggested I focus less on the subtle general criticism & more on the idea. In that way it might be inspiring. In that way it might be more helpful.
In that way perhaps I am learning how to actually be supportive.
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