Whither 1990?

a self-portrait from 1990

On my birthdays I play my favorite music from a year in my life. On the first episode of Self Help Radio that aired around the time of my birthday, I played music from the year I was born, 1968. That was in 2003. I have made it up to 1990.

Like last year, I have found so much music from that year that I love. I will undoubtedly fill up some other shows on KBOO's schedule late at night playing that leftover music. For tonight's show, I am playing music I loved in 1990 as it happened - mostly. There are a few artists that became important to me later whose work of that year means a great deal to me now. But the vast majority of the music I'll play tonight you would have found me listening to in 1990, when I was a mere 22 years old.

Music has always been important to me. It's how I process my feelings. It connects me to more memories than anything - except maybe trauma. It has been & remains my salvation. Since I was in a relationship in 1990 (albeit a one-sided one), that was the first time in my life that music took a back seat in my head & my heart. I didn't have ready access to my music either, for reasons I explained yesterday. & my "girlfriend" didn't like some of the music I liked, & was unhappy if I played it around her - so of course I didn't play it around her.

It's not that I'm saying I didn't need music in the same way as I had previously - I just didn't think I needed music in the same way as I had previously. It's a mistake that perhaps many people make. When that relationship came to its inevitable tragic end, music was there for me. In many ways, it was all I had. But that wouldn't happen until the end of 1991, so we'll save that for next year.

Please enjoy a selection of music that I truly, madly, deeply love which was released in 1990. That's tonight, midnight to 2am, on KBOO - 90.7 fm here in Portland, kboo dot fm everywhere.

& by the way, this is only the third time I've had one of these birthday shows on my actual birthday!