Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Whither Lightning?

(Image from here.)

The idea for a radio show about lightning came to me in a flash.  It just struck me as a bright idea.  It was enlightning, you might say.  Like a bolt from the blue - you might be shocked to hear this - I felt positive that I wouldn't be charged with plagiarism or imitation - it felt like it would be current & would spark people's interest.

Ohm sorry about that.  I have little resistance to puns!

& promise!  Very few if any lightning puns tonight.  Just lots of songs & lots of interviews: the educator Mr. Weather, my spiritual mentor Howard Gently, documentarian Allen Shariaty, & lightning-strike survivor CJ Buchanan.  The show, I think, will be electrifying.

Tonight!  On 93.9 fm WLXU in Lexington & online at the Lexington Community Radio website.  From 9-11pm eastern, 8-10pm central.

& perfectly safe.  Even though lightning rarely strikes in the same place for two hours.

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Preface To Lightning: Storm Chasing

Do you remember the movie Twister?  I don't.  I think Philip Seymour Hoffman was in it.  & Helen Hunt.  & either Bill Paxton or Bill Pullman.  Did those guys ever make a movie together?  How would we know?

This is a line I like, which I will probably read on this week's show: "Lightning seeks out the shortest route to something with a positive charge."  The shortest route.  If you are struck by lightning, not only was it because you were positive (better to stay negative), but it was because you were the nearest to wherever the lightning began.  Let that sink in.  You were closest to where the negative side of the lightning was, & you completed the circuit.  Maybe write that on your tombstone?

& no, I've never been anywhere near struck by lightning.  I have been very close, because I know how to count after a lightning strike to figure out its proximity.  Here's a children's website to teach you how to do that.  In case you didn't know.  I don't remember when I learned that, but it's something I've known for a long, long time.  Long enough to know, when I barely get to "five Mississippi," that I need to say, "That was close!"

Thinking about it, I don't remember many thunderstorms in Kentucky.  There was more rain than in Texas, but less storms.  Here, every rain event is a fucking storm.  Perhaps because Fort Worth is on the edge of the plains & storms roll in from the west.  Or maybe because Texas weather is like an eleventh grade thespian - or an eleventh grader period - everything is heightened.  Texas weather is like an eleventh grader relating to a song by the Cure.  It's all hyperbole & superlative.  & I thought that before Hurricane Harvey!

Here in Fort Worth lately it's been hot - not over 100 degrees Fahrenheit hot, but hot - & there's no rain in the forecast at all.  I can't say the same for Kentucky - I believe you guys got Irma rain & it's definitely cooler.  But it doesn't look like there'll be lightning for the show tomorrow night.

But of course I once did a morning show about sunrise in the winter when the sun didn't rise until late in the morning.  Self Help Radio has never claimed to be immediate or even relevant; when it appears it is, it's mostly accident or coincidence.

What do you want?  I don't own an almanac or anything!

Monday, September 18, 2017

Do People With Nervous Disorders Object To Animated GIFs?

Because I sure do.

Can you stop an animated gif?  I know that you can (most of the time) stop an embedded video, but, especially on Tumblr, an animated gif will just loop & loop & loop.  & it might have been delightful at some point, but now it's mainly annoying.

& speaking of, what about those pages - it seems like there's a few on otherwise reputable news & opinion sites - where there are more than one embedded video that plays, one after the other, impossible to find & therefore impossible to close or stop?  Can that be good for the advertiser?  Who in a rage trying to shut the damn page up is going to say, "Oh wait.  I need this product?"

& let's not even talk about the more illegitimate places on the web - not the Deep Web or the Dark Web or whatever - but the places were illicit things can be found - in my case, it's usually mp3s from a web page stored on a third party site - where just clicking anywhere on the page causes a cascade of open windows, some of which say dumb shit like "your computer has been infected - please call this number for help."  Who falls for that?  I guess some do.  But how irritating!

I understand this is the model that exists to help pay for online content.  It doesn't mean that I have be okay with it.  So enough with the looped animation, please!

Sunday, September 17, 2017

Meet My Pets (Again?) # 6: Pauline


Have you ever seen that bumper sticker that says "Who rescued who?"  It looks like this:

(found here)

It's a sweet & apt sentiment, although grammatically incorrect (it should read, "Who rescued whom?").  Many of us who adopt animals from shelters find ourselves far more rewarded than the animals, & that probably has as much to do with the fact that humans & canines have co-evolved for millennia as it does with the personalities of the animals involved.  But it's very true that Pauline, whom we adopted the day after our beloved George died in 2012, saved our lives.

As I wrote about here, George's death was as traumatic an experience as I've ever had in my life, & the night he died, I drank & drank & never got drunk.  Grief would not let me.  I had suggested to my wife that we might adopt another beagle by & by, & the next day she told me there were beagles puppies at the Lexington Humane Society.  The house had not felt the same since George had gone.  We were uncomfortable in our own skins.  We saw him everywhere, we looked for him everywhere, we felt lost & alone despite still having two dogs & three cats.  He took up that much space in our house & in our lives.

We went to look at two little beagle-ish girls (it was obvious even then they had some hound in them) & although if I could do it again I would've adopted both of them, I picked the one who looked most like a beagle & we brought Pauline home.  She was the last of the Beatle beagle names: George, Ringo, & Winston (which was John Lennon's middle name) were taken, but she was a girl, so she had to be a feminized Paul.  A puppy in the house brought it back to life, she distracted us from our loss, she needed food & love & attention & giving it to her was the best grief therapy around.

Of course, Pauline has grown up pampered, spoiled, & bratty, & she's very jealous & very demanding.  She's also, as I've said before, the first dog we've ever had who just loves being a dog, so nowadays, when it isn't too hot, she spends her time in her backyard - which my wife claims was a big reason for buying the house we live in now - just let that sink in: we bought a house partially so Pauline could have a good backyard.  That's how much she means to us.

She loves people & loves dogs & loves eating (that's the beagle part of her) & in general loves life.  She isn't much of a cuddler, but loves kissing.  She has only slept in our bed at night a fraction of the time the others have.  But after Winston, she's my favorite.  I'm so grateful to her, & I think she knows.  & takes advantage of the fact.

She's the one pet we have who'd be happier meeting you than vice versa.

Thursday, September 14, 2017

Self Help Radio 091317: Dancing

(It's the foxtrot! Original image here.)

Two hours of dancing!  Good thing everyone was drunk!

As I previously explained, the theme for this show was suggested to me, so I felt a good deal of pressure making it - I mean, I wanted the person who asked me to do the theme to enjoy the show - & now that it's done, I wonder if I did a good job.  I haven't heard yet.  & now I realize that the bigger a deal I make about it, the less likely it will be that others will suggest a theme.  I'm so needy & eager to please!

The wife snottily asked me last night when the last time I went dancing was.  It was probably at a wedding or something.  I haven't danced at an actual club since half my life ago.  But the other day, when I was mowing the lawn, & listening to music on my phone, I did kinda dance when there was a very danceable song in my ears.  Mowing/dancing.  Could be dangerous though.  & no one can hear the music but me, so perhaps the neighbors thought I was having a fit.

No, I will not do a show about mowing.  I might do a show about lawns & yards, though.  One day.

The show about dancing is doing its thing at the Self Help Radio website.  There's no cover to get in to that crappy club but you will need a username ("SHR") & a password ("selfhelp").  The show is in two halves, & what's in the halves, including the interviews, is listed below.

Don't forget to hydrate!

(part one)

"We Love Dancing" Arling & Cameron _All In_
"Dancing In Wild Circles" Holger Czukay _Good Morning Story_

"Arthur Murray Taught Me Dancing In A Hurry" Helen O'Connell with Jimmy Dorsey & His Orchestra _The Best Of Helen O'Connell On Capitol_
"Dancing With Myself" Nouvelle Vague _Bande À Part_
"On Slow Dancing" Fabio _Fabio After Dark_
"Keep On Dancing" The Commodores _Funk Drops, Vol. 3: Breaks, Nuggets, & Rarities_
"Dancing" Standard Fare _Indietracks 2010: An Indiepop Compilation_

interview with dance instructor CJ Buchanan

"Can We Go Dancing" The Amber Squad _This Is Mod, Vol. 1: The Rarities 1979-1981_
"Up Here For Thinking, Down There For Dancing" Tono & The Finance Company _Up Here For Dancing_
"Nothing Matters When We're Dancing" The Magnetic Fields _69 Love Songs, Vol. 1_
"Dancing Queen" Redd Kross _Secret Life_

interview with the Rev. Dr. Howard Gently about dancing & spirituality

"Dancin' Late At Night" Jonathan Richman & The Modern Lovers _Modern Lovers 88_

(part two)

"John, I'm Only Dancing" David Bowie _The Rise & Fall Of Ziggy Stardust & The Spiders From Mars_
"Dancing" Bauhaus _Mask_
"Dancing Barefoot" Patti Smith Group _Wave_

interview with dancer David Fruchter

"Those Dancing Days" Those Dancing Days _Those Dancing Days_
"Dancing In The Public Eye" Frankie Cosmos _Zentropy_
"Him Dancing" Throwing Muses _The Real Ramona_
"Dancing Octopi Occupy The Mind's Eye" Drug Boyfriend _Dancing Octopi Occupy The Mind's Eye_
"Suita De Danturi De Jucat/Dant Pe Sus/Dant Pe Mijloc" Stefan Olar & Petre Huta _World Library Of Folk & Primitive Music Romania_

interview with felon Jerry Tausend about dance therapy for rehabilitation

"Dancing In The Dark" The Snuggle Ups _Bridging The Distance: A Portland OR Cover Compilation_
"Dancing In The Street" Martha & The Vandellas _The Complete Motown Singles, Vol. 4: 1964_
"No Dancing" Basement Apartment _Transistor!_
"No Dancing" Elvis Costello _My Aim Is True_
"Come Dancing" The Kinks _State Of Confusion_

"Dancing To Music I Hate" Shimmering Stars _Violent Hearts_
"Dancing (With A Hole In My Heart)" The Mantles _Extended Dorkout: Singles & Leftovers_
"Dancing To The Beat" Clarence Murray _Action Speaks Louder Than Words: The Best Of SSS International_

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Whither Dancing?

(Image from here.)

"Dancing" is the theme for this week's Self Help Radio.  I am happy to report that it was not a theme I thought of myself.  Nope, someone suggested it.  They wrote to me at gary at self help radio dot net & asked, one, if I ever did a show about dancing (which was easy to check - though my memory is very faulty, there is an index page on the website which lists all the themes the show has covered), & two, if not, would I?  They also asked if I would not say their name, because, of course, being associated with Self Help Radio is never really a good idea.

That probably isn't a terribly satisfying reason for why the show has the theme it has this week, but it happens to be true.  It also happens to be rare - I always wonder why more folks don't request themes for the show.  One reason, of course, is that not many people listen to the show.  Other than that, I just don't know.  I don't think I've ever refused a theme, at least not in the last few years.  I would often, in the past, refuse themes that were way too general, like "cars."  One guy who listened in Austin called every so often to ask me to do a show about "cars."  If it had been around at the time, I would've said, "Bob Dylan covered it on his show already."  Who wants to follow Dylan?  He's a headliner!

Last week, technical problems at WLXU resulted in the previous week's show airing instead of that week's show.  I have received no information that suggests this will happen again, so let's hope that tonight's show about dancing finds itself ready to boogie from 9-11pm eastern at 93.9 fm in Lexington & online at LCR online.  I think I'll have a few drinks before the show; that way I'll be less self-conscious.  After all, we'll be dancing together for two hours!

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Preface To Dancing: Too Pooped To Promenade

(Image from here.)

Ha!  I envy those dance marathon weirdos in the above picture because I was just as tired today but without anyone to lean on.  Listen:

While I was working on this week's SHR yesterday - I know it seems like the show is slapped together at the last possible minute but I really do put some effort into it - I got a text from a KNON deejay asking me if I could sub her show the next day, from 7-9am.  I said yes without realized what I was doing - I'll probably never get a show on KNON & I miss live radio so I jump at (almost) every opportunity.  When I realized I had a ton of work to do for Self Help Radio, I began to panic.

You're probably not like this, but when the pressure of a deadline approaches, I feel the urge to just take a nap.  It's dumb.  I get tired, I imagine that the closer it gets to something being due, the harder I work.  I forget that I get desperate & lazy.  But I began trying to work on two simultaneous shows.

Forcing myself to go to bed at midnight, I hoped to sleep five hours.  I tossed & turned & was back fretting about radio shows at three am.  Which is good - I had to turn in Self Help Radio to WLXU by four pm or it wouldn't get put on the automation by tomorrow (although these days that's not quite a guarantee either way) - so I got a lot of work done.  But!

KNON is about forty-five minutes away.  More if there's traffic.  & morning traffic starts in Dallas around 5am.  I got to the station.  I did the show.  I had fun!  The deejay has someone come in with a band or performer around 8:20 & I got to "record" someone on the air, something I haven't done for quite a long time.

Afterwards, I headed home.  Stupidly, I had caffeine.

A couple of years ago I gave up caffeine.  I had tapered off but during a long road trip I drank sodas to keep me awake; when I got home, I couldn't sleep, & the next day I had awful caffeine withdrawal headaches.  I said no more.  But today I was desperate.  I had had less than three hours sleep the night before.  & I still had stuff to edit!

That's the worst thing about prerecording a show.  Sure, I could just do it live to tape & send it off but that's not who I am.  If I can make something slightly better out of my miserable work, I'll try.  I didn't try much today, though.  I wanted to get it done.  & I did, hopefully on time.

Then I was up for three more hours while the caffeine made me jittery.  Holy shit.  All of this for radio.  Why aren't there opportunities for SHR in DFW?  IDK!

When I finally fell asleep, I was unconscious, dreamless, for around five hours.  The wife came home expecting dinner & instead thought about calling paramedics.

So - you see those exhausted dancing couples up above?  That's me today.  All of them.  All of them are me.

& you know what?  I don't think I'll get to bed at a decent hour.  Because I need to be up at 6am.  For fuck's sake!

Monday, September 11, 2017

Dancing, Not Danson

(Image from here.)

There appears to have been a misunderstanding.  The show this week is about dancing.  It is not about Danson, meaning Emmy-winning actor Ted Danson.

It's understandable why there would be a mix-up: the word "dancing" & the name "Danson" are almost homophones.  "Dancin' with Danson" would be a fun reality show or perhaps a Youtube series of shorts.  Or it could be "Danson with Dancin'," a series where talented dancers choreograph productions while images of Ted Danson are projected onto them.  Frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if there were a troupe called The Dancin' Dansons, where each dancer assumed an identity based on characters Ted Danson has played: Sam Malone from "Cheers," George Christopher from "Bored To Death," Hank Larrson from "Fargo," etc.

What there isn't, alas, are a plethora of songs about Ted Danson.  Lots of songs about dancing, not many songs about Danson.  It would really just be me playing that "Where Everybody Knows You're Name" song for two hours & wondering how come I never saw any of the CSI episodes he was on.

Why would people think the show would be about Ted Danson?  That's easy.  Imagine someone is asking another person, in casual conversation, "Oh hey, what is Self Help Radio about this week?"  The person replies, "Dancin'."  & the first person hears "Danson."  I'm sure that happens all the time.  "Want to go dancin'?" a friend asks, & you reply, "Go Danson?  What does that mean?"  Frankly the man has been a linguistic nightmare for decades now.

My apologies if you wanted an entire show about Ted Danson.  Maybe in the future.  Well, most probably not.  This week the show is about dancing.

Again, sorry for the confusion.

Sunday, September 10, 2017

Meet My Pets (Again) # 5: Bronte


Five years ago, when I detailed the animals in my house, I said about Bronte, here's the last of my pets.  I said that here.  Oh what a difference five years makes!

Bronte is no longer the youngest aminal in the house - she has three younger siblings!  & the famously asthmatic Bronte hasn't really had any respiratory distress in a long time - she is given an inhaler twice a day (if you'd like to know how that happens, click here) & she takes her meds & eats as much as she can & wanders around the house like the snuffleupagus she turned out to be.

She remains attached to Bolan, with whom she spends the most time, but also she will come to me or her mom & need to be petted, or need someone to pad on (what an old friend of mine used to call "making bread"), or just want to be loved.  She seems on the surface to be shy, aloof, skittish - but the last time we took her to the vet, she strolled boldly about the examination room, causing the staff there to say, "What a headstrong kitty!"

She is.  We are glad we were able to make her healthy so she could be that way.  Sweet Bronte!

Thursday, September 07, 2017

Self Help Radio 090617: Guards

(Seriously, these guys are all anyone on the internet thinks about when you type in the word "guards."  Original image here.)

Please enjoy this great, unaired episode of Self Help Radio.  Well, at the very least it was unaired.  & even that seems too generous.

A radio show about guards would be derelict in its duty if it didn't talk about security guards (there's an interview with the dean of the Security Guard School Of America), about art guards (there's an interview with one of them), & about guardian angels (a topic the show's spiritual advisor discusses & expands upon).  In addition, there's a summery set of songs about lifeguards, & something weird happens to me as I am visited by an FBI agent dressed like some kind of guard.  & so many songs.  Why so many songs?  I have a guarded opinion about that.

The show is on guard at the Self Help Radio website.  Please note that, much like being stopped at a guard post before being allowed to enter, you'll need a username & a password.  I wish the password was "swordfish":



But no, the username is "SHR" & the password is "selfhelp."  The shows are divided in two, & what's in the two parts, including the interviews, is listed below.

(part one)

"Border Guards" The Rosebuds _Life Like_
"Changing Of The Guard" The Marquis Of Kensington _The London Look_
"Invisible Ones Guard the Gate" Orenda Fink _Invisible Ones_

"Coast Guard (feat. Holy Worm)" Drug Boyfriend _Coast Guard_
"Coastguard" The Young Knives _Junky Music Make My Heart Beat Faster_
"The Unguarded Moment" The Church _The Church_
"Mon Ange Gardien" April March _All Is Fair In Love & Chickfactor: CF Mixtape 1_

interview with art guard David Fruchter

"Art Guard" Fishboy _Art Guards_
"Standing Guard" Wastrels _Jenner Affair_
"Knocking Down Guardrails" Tina Peel _Pajama Party!_
"River Guard" Smog _Knock Knock_

a discussion about guardian spirits with the Rev. Dr. Howard Gently

"Please Don't Talk To The Lifeguard" Andrea Carroll _Meet The Carroll "Family" Girls_
"What Does A Lifeguard Do In The Fall" June August _Surf Bunnies & Hot Rod Honeys_

(part two)

"Mr Lifeguard (Come & Rescue Me)" Brenda Holloway _The Artistry Of Brenda Holloway_
"I Wanna Be A Lifeguard" Blotto _Hello! My Name Is Blotto. What's Yours?_
"Lifeguard On Duty" Morrissey _Bona Drag_

interview with Security Guard School Of American Dean CJ Buchanan

"Lonely Security Guard" Hayden _In Field & Town_
"Honor Guard" Tobin Sprout _The Universe & Me_
"Traffic Guards" Ronnie Willhoite _The Doorkeepers: A Church Leadership Development Program For Ushers_
"Hopes Up, Guard Down" The Safes _Record Heat_
"Blue Our Old Cell Block Guard" Dale Watson & His Lone Stars _People I've Known, Places I've Been_

surprise visit with FBI Agent Allen Shariaty

"Guardian Angel" Donnie & The Del Chords _Donnie & The Del Chords_
"Guardian Angel" The Children _Every Single Day_
"Guardian Angel" Smack Dab _Majestic Root_
"Guardian Angel" Human Sexual Response _Fig. 15_
"Guardian Angels" Wyldlife _The Time Has Come To Rock & Roll_

"Changing Of The Guards" Patti Smith _Twelve_

Wednesday, September 06, 2017

Whither Guards?

(A security guard in Santa Rosa, California, outside a Whole Foods.)

Can I tell you, I feel like I've been a little off.  Been a little depressed, been sleeping poorly, been managing my time unwisely.  I think this has been reflected in the last couple of shows, in both of which I make some pretty dumb mistakes.  I corrected those mistakes on the files which are on the show's website, but for those who were listening, it must've been a case of "it's usually not very good but this week it's worse!"

Not that I'm promising this week will be any better.  Maybe just the opposite: I'm warning you that my slump continues.  But things seemed to go more smoothly for me this week.  The proof is in the radio pudding, of course.  I could very well be writing about this again next week.

So, why guards?  I think the idea for this show came about because of an interesting juxtaposition of experiences.  On a Sunday afternoon a few months ago, I was at the Modern Art Museum Of Fort Worth to see a movie.  They have a theater, you see.  My wife had gone to get the tickets & I was wandering around, looking at gift shop stuff.  I noticed that a security guard nearby seemed to be watching me closely.  I looked at him, he looked away.  I looked away, he turned back to me.  That was weird.  I don't think I look like the kind of guy who would grab a bunch of art postcards & make a run for it.  I looked again, he looked away.  The wife called to me & we went to see the movie.

Later that day I was listening to the new album by Fishboy which is called Art Guards & which has a song on it called "Art Guards."  It occurred to me that museums might be a good theme.  But then I thought, thinking about the furtive security guard earlier, that guards might be a good theme.  The idea was planted, & it was time to harvest this week.  You'll hear the results tonight!

Yes, tonight, from 9-11pm eastern on 93.9 fm WLXU in Lexington & online as always at Lexington Community Radio Online.  The station has a cool new website, by the way.  I dig it.

Anyway, listen.  Tell me if it sounds like I'm worser than usual.  I can take the criticism.  I'm not at all guarded.  Even tonight!

Tuesday, September 05, 2017

Preface To Guards: My Own Small Experience In Guarding

No, I have never worked as a security guard.  I've never been employed in any type of security or guarding at all.  Except.  Let me think.

You know, I was thinking about this.  In the Peanuts comic, if I am remembering correctly, there were times when some of the characters got to be crossing guards.  Which means, the people who walked into the road to stop the automobiles from coming through an intersection when children were passing.  If that were something that happened in the past, it did not happen when I was a kid.  Crossing guards were almost always slightly loopy retirees who probably had nothing else to do that day.  Allowing kids to do it would have been crazy.

But perhaps we had hall monitors.  These fucking quislings were students who told on other students who might be trying to cut class or otherwise sneak around, perhaps to go to the bathroom.  I don't remember if my school had hall monitors, but I suppose I would've been glad to be one, anything to relieve the boredom of schooling.  Although standing in the halls pretending to have authority would have been just as boring.  I would not have felt that a sash or a title would have allowed me to tell anyone to do anything.

Probably the one time I ever guarded - or the two times, or whatever - would be whenever I worked the door at some radio station benefit.  In effect, I was a bouncer, which, you must admit, is a kind of guard.  Many times have I checked IDs, looked up will-call names, put wristbands on or stamped hands, all at benefits for whatever radio station I was currently deejaying at.

& if those are experience as guards, then I have virtually no experience at all.  I've never turned anyone away, or tried to cow a disgruntled customer, or thrown my weight around at some difficult situation.  Would I be good at such a thing?  I doubt it!

As for the official guards - the National Guard, the Coast Guard, the Guardians Of The Galaxy - I of course don't qualify for those.  Too old, flat feet, a coward - too many reasons why not.

Anyway, if I were a security guard, it would end up like this poor bastard in The Wire:

Monday, September 04, 2017

Twin Peaks

Back in the day, the late 80s, early 90s, I wasn't what you would call a David Lynch fan.  I suffered through Eraserhead, I was massively bored by Dune, I enjoyed (if that's the right word) Blue Velvet, & I liked Wild At Heart enough, especially because I felt like it encapsulated the themes Lynch was interested in & would return to in his later works.  But nothing knocked me out as much as Twin Peaks*.  It was funny, it was weird, it was terrifying.  There was nothing like it on television, & even in my twenties I knew that meant it was doomed.

My friend Kevin at work turned me on to it - I didn't watch much television in those, my college days.  But I devoured it.  I have the first six episodes memorized.

Of course, the show lost its audience (I remember even some members of my family watched the first few episodes) & the cliffhanger at the end of season two was infuriating.  I was amazed & excited when a revival - a "return" - was announced.

& gosh, was it great!  The past few Sundays have been a joy because of that magical show.  & then last night, the final episode.  Well.  Here's what I said on Facebook:



There are very few television shows that end as strong as they begin.  One of the failings of the first version of Twin Peaks was that it wanted to be a regular weekly television show, which meant it had to add uninteresting plot points to pad episodes.  If American television had the same tradition British television has, we could have had three or four satisfying "series" of Twin Peaks in the nineties, some twenty-four episodes, all strong.  But that's not how it works here.

Some television shows end weakly because they lose popularity.  Some end because they run out of ideas.  & some of them end in such a way they completely invalidate what made them great or captivating in the first place (I'm looking at you, Dexter & Sons Of Anarchy).  None of these really apply to Twin Peaks.

It's been utterly extraordinary how much of a singular (or dual, if you count Mark Front, the series' co-creator) vision this season of Twin Peaks has been.  That's why I can't hate how the show ended.  But I can feel a little betrayed, &, like I said above, resentful.  & this is what I said on Twitter:


That actually doesn't make any sense, but I think I was trying to make the point that no one is really going to understand the series' ending as well as those who made it, although there's a lotta discussion today on the interwebs about that.  Which is fine, discuss away.  I just wish there had been some resolution, instead of an open-ended, open-to-interpretation fade to black.  I am very unhappy about it, although I again stress it hasn't affected the overall experience enough for me to change my love to disgust.

What I am going to do is pretend it ended somewhere in the middle of the 17th episode & the rest doesn't really count.  It's kind of like the comic book Daredevil at the end of the "Born Again" storyline, or the comic Swamp Thing after Alan Moore left.  The endings of those were so satisfying that the comics should've stopped there, or at least been allowed to rest for a few years.  But nope.  Lesser writers & artists took over, & I left.  I'm just going to say I left when Cooper returned to save the day & imagine that the rest of the journey was something some fanboy told me he read about on the internet & I said, "Gee, that's interesting, but also, you must admit, kinda dumb."

Also, David Lynch & I share a birthday.  Just thought I should mention that.

* For the record, my favorite David Lynch film is The Straight Story.

Sunday, September 03, 2017

Meet My Pets (Again) # 4: Winston


My favorite puppy is Winston.  It's true.  I admitted it five years ago & I'll say it again now.  He's the beagle that made me fall in love with beagles.  The other two beagles we had previously are my wife's dogs.  George was my wife's before she & I met.  Ringo is still more attached to her, to the point that, sure, he's happy to see me when I come home, but he still runs to the door to wait for her, & he cries out when she's not here.

But Winston, though he still loves his mom more than me, he touched my heart in a way that surprised me.  Before him, I thought I was a cat person, or at least leaned toward cats.  Winston made the balance equal in my heart.  He was so small, he had an affliction (described in the previously linked post), he needed more love & attention, & also he demanded that.

As he's gotten older, he's grayed more than his brothers, but he's still as scrappy as ever, despite back problem, gut problems, teeth problems, & weakened back legs.  He's nigh unstoppable.

The other night he was in bed between me & the wife, & he got up, as he does, to go find somewhere else to sleep.  It always breaks my heart when any of the animals do that, but instead of tumbling off the bed, he came up next to me, turned a couple of times, & made a huffing noise, & plopped under my arm.  You cannot imagine how happy that made me.

The next night, of course, he slept in the living room.

Thursday, August 31, 2017

Self Help Radio 083017: Indiepop A To Z # 54

(Almost all these images found at Discogs.)

& there's another episode in the can.  How was it?  There sure are a lot of bands that I consider indiepop, aren't there?  & they don't have all the same sound, do they?  These are a lot of questions.  Perhaps they're rhetorical.

Sometimes I wonder if an archivist must also be a completist.  The week before I do this show, I listen to a lot of music.  If I had my druthers, if my druthers hadn't been gone long before I knew I had druthers, I would be even more inclusive.  I would say, as the kids do, "This may not be indiepop, but it's indiepop-adjacent!"  Do the kids say that?  I mean, with words other than indiepop.  I haven't been around kids for a long time.  They grow up, up, & away so fast.  Or is that just superkids?

In any event, this might be a fun show for you to listen to while you're waiting in line for precious gasoline, since one of the main places we get that from is under water right now.  I don't mean to make light of the ongoing tragedy in Houston & the Texas coast - my heart goes out to the people there, I hope they find themselves someplace safe & I hope that the city recovers quickly.  I just hope those people who are waiting in lines & griping about it understand their inconvenience is minor compare to actual suffering just three hundred miles away.

Jeez, I didn't mean to get weird.  It's on my mind, you know.  The show can be listened to at the Self Help Radio website.  There's a username (SHR) & a password (selfhelp) you'll need to listen, if you want.  The show is in two parts; what's in those parts is below.

In four months, if the world hasn't turn into Mad Max: Fury Road, we'll finish the "Ma"s & get to the "Mc"s.  Promise!

(part one)

"The Choice You Have" Malory _Outerbeats_
"California Dreamin'" The Mamas & The Papas _All The Leaves Are Brown: The Golden Era Collection_
"Drive Drive Drive" The Man From Delmonte _The Good Things In Life_

"Country Boy" The Man Upstairs _Sad In My Heart 7"_
"Indecision" Manatee _Indecision_
"More Than Happy" The Mandelbrot Set _A Place Called Kansas_
"Things You've Never Done" The Manhattan Love Suicides _The Manhattan Love Suicides_
"Rasberry Thighs" The Mantles _Long Enough To Leave_

"Sucker" Maow _The Unforgiving Sounds Of... Maow_
"La Balada De La Primavera" Le Mans _Moshi Moshi (Pop International Style)_
"Still Dreaming" The Marble Staircase _Whaam! Bam! Thank You Dan!_
"Go Marilee" Marbles _Pyramid Landing & Other Favorites_
"Oh Constance" Marden Hill _Dream Topping: él Retrospective_

"Through The Hole" Mardi Picasso _Smerk_
"Welcome To Stalingrad" Montt Mardie _Skaizerkite_

(part two)

"I'm So Happy" The Mare _I'm So Happy_
"Musicienne" Marie Antoinette _Musicienne_
"Waiting In Line" The Marigolds _Wild!_

"Lazy Ways" Marine Girls _Lazy Ways/Beach Party_
"Big Sur" Marine Life _Fool Of A Kind_
"Hopefulness To Hopelessness" Marine Research _Sounds From The Gulf Stream_
"When Will You Realise That I Care" Marine Time Keepers _When Will You Realise That I Care_
"One Inch Punch" Mark 700 _Cohiba_

"Dead Girl In My Bed" The Marmite Sisters _Tug EP_
"Mercy Mercy, To My Melancholic Life Journey" The Marshmallow Kisses _Ciao! Baby_
"First Kiss" The Marteens _The Sound Of Leamington Spa, Vol. 4_
"1997, Passing In The Hallway" Martha _Courting Strong_
"Fish Bowl" Mary-Go-Round _Plays Golden Hits_

"Lost" The Mary Onettes _The Mary Onettes_
"Evensong" Mary Queen Of Scots _Mary Queen Of Scots/Peru Split 7"_
"Follow The Sound" Mascott _Follow The Sound_