Wednesday, November 14, 2018

Preface To Sheep: I Once Dated A Shepherd

Anyway, that was her last name.

Last names are strange things.  There was a time when most people didn't have last names.  As this website says, "Tracing the origins of surnames can help us gleam more insights into the lives of our ancestors. Early last names were often linked to occupations, geographical features, nicknames, or even a combination of their mother’s & father’s name."

My last name - which is Dickerson - according to this site - is basically the same as "Richardson."  But check this:

"This interesting surname is a patronymic form of Dick, itself a pet form of the given name Richard. Richard originated from a rare Anglo-Saxon name 'Ricehard,' meaning rule-hard. An 8th Century English Kinglet of this name died at Lucca, in Italy, on his way to Rome, & is there still venerated as St. Ricardo, but it was the Old German Ricohard that was spread by two pre-Conquest Dukes among the Normans, & brought by them to England. A Ricard is recorded in the Domesday Book of 1086; but the softer French Richard prevailed, with several short forms, such as Rich, Rick, Dick, Hick, Dickie, Richie, etc.. The surname is first recorded in the mid 14th Century. One, John Dykonesson, is noted in the register of the Freemen of the City of York (1388). In the modern idiom the surname has many variant spellings including Dickenson, Dickinson, Dickeson, Dickison, Dickason, etc."

Just taking a brief moment to emphasize this sentence, which I promise this is a coincidence I did not know this when I started yammering about last names:

"On November 9th 1629, Dorithy Dickerson married William Sheapheard at St. Giles Cripplegate, London."

Boom!  Connection!  It concludes:

"The first recorded spelling of the family name is shown to be that of William Dykounson, which was dated 1366, Subsidy Rolls of Lancashire, during the reign of King Edward 111, 'The Father of the Navy,' 1327 - 1377. Surnames became necessary when governments introduced personal taxation. In England this was known as Poll Tax. Throughout the centuries, surnames in every country have continued to 'develop' often leading to astonishing variants of the original spelling."

If you can tell any disappointment from me in any of this, well, there is.  The German word for "fat" is dick.  German has the -er ending (I suppose English took it from there) to indicate comparative adjectives, so "dicker" can mean "fatter" or "thicker."  The German word for "son" is Sohn, so I kind of assumed that - possibly because I have German relatives on my mother's side, even though my last name is my dad's name - the name had Germanic roots.  Therefore, my last name could be translated as "fat man's son."  Or even better, "fatter dude's kid."

But nope.  At some point some ancestor of mine was named Richard, possibly referred to as "Dick," & I'm descended from one of his kids.

Not coincidentally, my father, whose first name was Everett, was called Dick by everyone, including my mother.  So in a very real way, I am the son of Dick.

This has nothing to do with sheep.  Except that weird bit where a Dickerson married a Sheapheard.  It was just a rabbit hole I found myself in just now.

Tuesday, November 13, 2018

Holy Spit! I'm About To Reach 3000 Posts!

It's kind of a milestone, yeah? Or is it a millstone?

Today I had another pledge drive show for the Tuesday Morning Blend, which was only successful because a friend made a big pledge. That was amazing. Even my wife pledged, although not much, & she later apologized for being so cheap. She was raised by a man who was wealthy because he never spent any money if he didn't have to. My wife is one of those people who will buy something for $9.99 but not for $10.00 - one is a bargain, the other is overpriced.

Still, I tried to be positive about the show & I'm not letting my self-esteem get damaged by something over which I have not very much control. I still maintain people should naturally support the things they want to, they shouldn't need to be guilted into it, or lured by gifts. But that's not the way the world works, & I'm probably never going to be good at selling anything, even something I value as much as community radio. Hell, my wife knows that I believe in community radio more than most anything & have given more of my heart & soul & time to it in four different cities & at more than six different stations, & even she was like, eh, it's not worth that much.

Speaking of the wife, she visits with her surgeon tomorrow to find out how much longer she needs to wear her hard collar (she had spinal surgery in the neck region) & what her allowed range of motion will be.  That will hopefully be a good thing. It may also take some pressure off me - she might not have been the perfect patient, but I've not been the perfect caregiver.

Tonight I'm going to drink whiskey & catch up on my comic book shows. The wife is already asleep, hooray for muscle relaxants! & I'll try & think if there's something (anything) I should do to celebrate taking the time to write three thousand of these blog posts. Probably not. Mostly they were worthless. At best they conveyed a little information. At worst - which was most of the time - I had nothing to say. & still I said it. Over & over.

Monday, November 12, 2018

The Week After A Certain Theme

Is when I tend to find funny stuff about that theme.  Like this image:

It was apparently shared on Facebook four years ago.  Interestingly, I found it on the cover of a book on Amazon that came out in 2017. So I don't know where it originated. I probably just found it on a Tumblr blog many moons ago.

How nice would it have been if I had found it this time last week though?

Saturday, November 10, 2018

Self Help Radio 111018: Moments

(Original image - entitled "Those Fleeting Moments" - from here.)

Finally! At long last! Much-anticipated! Much-missed! Much-what? You didn't notice the show hadn't happened yesterday? Oh. Well, it's happening today. In case you cared. You don't? That's obvious. I'm just going to go ahead &... Ah, you're gone.

Here is the show that should have dropped (as the kids say) yesterday at noon but I hadn't even picked it up by then (as the kids don't say). Isn't it ironic that a show about moments missed its moment & that there were moments when I didn't even know I'd get it done? You'd think it might be a momentous undertaking, & maybe it felt that way, but only momentarily. As it is, it's more of the same old thing. Just a bunch of moments collected in a radio show type frame.

The show is now available for you to pay attention to you for a moment or two at Self Help Radio dot net.  Pay attention to password/username information.  The songs I play & the weirdoes I talk to are noted below.

Celebrate the moments of your life, or something.

Self Help Radio Moments Show

"The Moment" Indurain _What You Get For Being Naive_
"Another Moment Follows" Cloudberry Jam _Providing The Atmosphere_
"Moments Are Moments" The Saint Valentine State _Between Two Waves: The Second Wave_


"This Moment" Lewis Black _Anticipation_
"Love The Moment" The Bartlebees _From Path Of Pain To Jewels Of Glory_
"The Moment" Boyracer _Happenstance_
"The Unguarded Moment" The Church _Of Skins & Heart_
"A Thrill A Moment" Kim Weston _The Complete Motown Singles, Vol. 5: 1965_

interview with the Rev Dr Howard Gently

"Moments In Love" The Art Of Noise _Moments In Love_
"Assertive Moments" Ronderlin _The Great Investigation_
"Moment Of Silence" George Carlin _When Will Jesus Bring The Pork Chops?_
"In A Moment Of Madness" The Flower Pot Men _Let's Go To San Francisco_
"Left Of The Moment" The Blood Group _Everything Forgotten Gathers At The Ceiling_

interview with Jeffrey & Beyond

"At Any Moment" Wax Idols _American Tragic_
"After The Moment" Craft Spells _Idle Labor_
"Most Metal Moment" Adam Newman _Not For Horses_
"Magic Moments" Table Table _Messthetics # 104 (D.I.Y. '77-81 South Wales I)_
"Momentz (feat. De La Soul)" Gorillaz _Humanz_


"A Few Precious Moments" George Jackson _Leavin' Your Homework Undone: In The Studio With George Jackson 1968-1971_
"My Whole World Ended (The Moment You Left Me)" The Spinners _2nd Time Around_
"Stolen Moments" Mary Jane Hooper & Richie Matta _Eddie Bo's Funky Funky New Orleans_
"A Fearful Moment" Mekons & Robbie Fulks _Jura_
"It Only Takes A Moment" Jeffrey Lewis & Los Bolts _Manhattan_

conclusion & goodbye

"Hybrid Moments" PINS _Too Little Too Late_
"It Takes A Moment" Deep Sea Diver _Secrets_
"Live In The Moment" Teenage Fanclub _Here_
"Fleeting Moments" Pocketbooks _Rough Trade Shops: Indiepop 09_
"The Moment's Gone" The Arrogants _Nobody's Cool

Friday, November 09, 2018

Whither Moments?

(Image from here.)

Some thoughts about this week's (late) episode of Self Help Radio:

1) My apologies, I can't believe I needed an extra day to put it together.
2) Really, I hope I get it done tomorrow!
3) Maybe its moment has passed.
4) It's going to be one of those shows where there are just so many songs that fit the theme that I couldn't play all of them in such a short time & you're gonna be like why didn't he play that song it would've been perfect.
5) It's really why I tend to prefer more restrictive themes.
6) But someone asked me to do this theme.
7) At least it seemed like they were asking me.
8) & I didn't ask their permission to mention their name.
9) So now I'm talking about them like they're plural.
10) Which in a different context but not at this moment might be insulting.
11) So this obviously shabby show will be for them.
12) Tomorrow - Saturday - at noon.
13) At Self Help Radio dot net.
14) For many moments to come.

Thursday, November 08, 2018

Give Me A Moment!

Argh, this week has utterly crushed me.

As I've explained/complained about before, the combination of working on the show for the KNON Pledge Drive + the obsession with the election + spending the day with my wife & her doctors has given me, well, today to work on this week's Self Help Radio.  A show, by the way, about moments.

There's no way, not even working twenty-four straight hours, that I could have the show done by noon tomorrow.  Maybe if I could do it live, but I don't do that that way these days, & even then, gosh would it be shabby as fuck.

Not that it won't be shabby as fuck anyway, but I can guarantee a slightly less shabby show if I take a moment to work on it rather than rushing to get it done.

Here's hoping you understand.  This week's Self Help Radio will happen Saturday at noon instead of Friday at noon.  You might say it was waiting to pick its moment.  But really, I was overwhelmed when I'm normally just plain whelmed.  I thank you for your understanding.

Wednesday, November 07, 2018

Preface To Moments: It Should've Been More Of A Moment

But I'm glad it's over.

The wife took muscle relaxants (she's recovering from surgery) & passed out on the sofa.  I drank beer with whiskey chasers & paced nervously about the room.  I texted with a couple of people but mainly just freaked out a little before ultimately deciding I was happy with the House change & stumbling into bed.

It wasn't a great week - my first Fall Pledge Drive show was a bust - although I did have nice people in the studio with me, that was good.  But not much money was raised.  I made a coffee cake for my helpers, & stuck around while KNON staff wandered in, & they ate some too.  In this way I distract from my appalling on-air performance.

& now, oh shit!  I have a Self Help Radio to put together!  Let's see how that turns out.  These moments of my life, are they just weird, separate parts or do they make some kind of whole?  I wonder.

Tuesday, November 06, 2018

Another Stressful Night

Like you, I know a bunch of people who don't vote.  They'll often quote George Carlin.  Or Morrissey, who sings this in "World Peace Is None Of Your Business": "Each time you vote you support the process."  I understand that way of thinking.  & yet...

It baffles me, ultimately.  The system is corrupt, & the "winner-take-all" attitude is maddening.  If I were a politician - & this is why I'm not - I would attempt to find out what my constituents wanted, & vote that way.  You may think this naïve, or dishonest, but when I've worked at stations to craft policy, my proposals were often voted down, & I labored ahead anyway.  But that's not how politics works in this country, & even if it were more like that at some point, it's gotten worse.

When I was twenty, I was able to vote for President for the first time.  I guess that means I've voted in eight presidential elections.  (For the record, my candidate has won just three of those times.  I didn't vote for Clinton in 1996, but I didn't vote for anyone for President that year.)  (Well, I should say, my candidate won five of those times - but the popular vote, not the electoral college.)

This morning, on the Tuesday Morning Blend, I begged for money for the station, but I also begged for people to vote.  Here's the thing: if you find it difficult to vote, then vote for people who will make it easier.  As long as one party believes that, even if they win by one vote, they can enact whatever agenda they want, there's going to be troubles voting.  Because that one party doesn't want people who don't agree with them to vote.

It wasn't a good show & there was way too much ineffectual begging for money, but you can listen to it here if you're at all bored.  I will be drinking whiskey & hoping against hope that America surprises me tonight.  I have lived too long to think the good guys will finally win.

Or at least who I think the good guys are.  The people passionately defending candidates I find reprehensible find me passionately defending my candidates reprehensible.  One of my wife's students became more politically aware this year & discovered to his shock & horror that his mother was conservative.  So it goes.


Monday, November 05, 2018

Does Nothing Stop?

Yikes!  The KNON Pledge Drive is happening as we speak!  As well, tomorrow is Election Day!  So I'll have to beg for money on the air while I am begging for folks to vote!

In honor of the day, the Tuesday Morning Blend will be a bit Self Help Radio-like & the entire show will be about elections & voting.  I hope you can listen.  Where can you listen?  When can you listen?

At 89.3 fm in Dallas & Fort Worth.  Online everywhere at

But I'd rather you voted.  Especially if the last two years have scared the shit out of you.

Friday, November 02, 2018

Self Help Radio 110218: Well I Never

(Original image over here.)

What is it, I wonder, that I never do?  Is it that I never lie?  Or I never loved you?  That I never worry, or that I never knew?  Could it be that I never want anything, or have I never wanted anything more? With a word like "never" in play, it's a wonder this show isn't filled with Cure songs!

It is what it is.  It's the nature of a show like this that the exploration of a theme may seem, at the outset, to lend itself to greater interest & insight.  & sometimes not.  Which was this show?  I know how I feel, tell me how you feel after you're listened, won't you?

The show is now at the Self Help Radio website.  You'll need a username & password to listen, as you probably know by now.  Well, I never told you this directly: the username is SHR & the password is selfhelp.  The songs I played & the silliness in-between are both listed below.

I never get tired of doing these ridiculous shows, you know.  I think I may have a problem.

Self Help Radio Well I Never Show

"I Never Happened" Comet Gain _I Never Happened 7"_
"I Never Wanted Any Of This" Best Wishes _Bella Vista + Best Wishes 7"_
"I Never Loved Anyone" Voyagers _Teen Town U.S.A., Vol. 6_

introduction & complications

"I Never Would" Seapony _Go With Me_
"I Never Tell Me Twice" Kangaroo _Kangaroo_
"I Never Knew" Roy Orbison _The Sun Years_
"I Never See Maggie Alone" Hot Lips Page _1946-1950_
"I Never Want To See You Again" Quasi _Featuring "Birds"_

interview with FBI Special Agent Charles McGruff

"I Never Found Out" Adam Green & Binki Shapiro _Adam Green & Binki Shapiro_
"I Never Get Much Sleep On Weekdays" Mikrofisch _Masters Of The Universe_
"I Never Will Marry" The Smothers Brothers _Think Ethnic_
"I Never Worry" Bob Troy _I Never Worry_
"I Never Knew" Eddie Foster _The Wigan Casino Story_

interview with birds

"I Never Said I Was Deep" Jarvis Cocker _Further Complications_
"I Never Loved You" Strawberry Story _The Man With The Stereo Hands_
"I Never Liked The Look Of You" Airport Girl _Seven Summers (International Pop Vol. 2)_
"I Never Wanted Love" Shannon & The Clams _Onion_
"I Never Needed It Now So Much" The Go! Team _Proof Of Youth_

Ned Dry interrupts

"I Never Imagined" Mighty Mighty _One Way EP_
"I Never Said That" The Brilliant Corners _What's In A Word_
"I Never Loved Your Mind" Jumprope _Holiday In Brazil_
"I Never Lied To You" Syd Barrett _Barrett_
"I Never Wanted To Be A Star" Cat Stevens _Izitso_

the unexpected fifth airbreak of the show

"I Never Loved Her" The Starfires _Pebbles, Vol. 8: Southern California 1_
"I Never Thought I'd Find" Manikins _Inner City Sound_
"I Never Thought It Would Happen" The Rubinoos _The Rubinoos_
"I Never Want An Easy Life If Me & He Were Ever To Get There" The Charlatans _Up To Our Hips_
"I Never Knew" The Fastbacks _The Question Is No_

conclusions & goodbyes

"I Never Picked Cotton" Johnny Cash _American Recordings: Unchained_
"I'm Glad I Never" Lee Hazlewood _Requiem For An Almost Lady_
"I Never Raised My Voice To You" Harvest Ministers _Orbit_
"Song I Never Sung" Tom Selleck's Moustache _Heartbreak 101

Thursday, November 01, 2018

Whither Well I Never?

(Image from here.)

At long last! Could it be? Finally? The Self Help Radio episode on indignation?!?

As the Google dictionary tells us:

Surely this must mean...!

No, sorry.  Sorry, no.  It's just another one of those phrase shows.  Every song will feature someone saying something in the form of "I Never."  I never lied.  I never wanted.  I never verb or I never verbed.  That's all.  I know it's not fun for anyone but me, but I simply can't help myself.  How many songs can I find like this?  How will they fit together?  That's what I enjoy doing.

It's cool though - you don't have to listen tomorrow at noon at Self Help Radio dot net.  I won't be outraged that you don't.  & in a couple of weeks I'm doing another animal show, maybe you like that better.

But I totally agree - a show about indignation would be awesome.

Wednesday, October 31, 2018

Preface To Well I Never: Happy Halloween!

Now, I'm not going to point you to all the Halloween shows I've done but I did want to take the time to find answers to questions about Halloween that I've had which I only think about on Halloween but am too busy eating candy to remember to look up after Halloween.  Here they are:

Why do fundamentalist Christians hate Halloween?  Maybe the answer is pretty obvious, but it's nice to have it laid out.  Here is a web page explaining their objections from their point of view.

Are you old enough to recall when there was a scare about people putting razor blades in Halloween candy?  Did those things really happen?  Apparently they did not.

How about all that Satan worship stuff everyone lost their shit about in the 80s & 90s.  That's all over now, right?  Um, no.  No it's really not.

This is a weird one I just discovered on Snopes: A blue bucket is said to indicate the child has autism?  This is a weird world.

We didn't buy much candy-type stuff today - actually, we bought organic fruit roll-ups types that the wife likes in case we don't give many away - but I did notice that there's something called a Treat Map on Next Door Dot Com which lets parents know who has candy.  I think that's neat.  But I
still don't think we'll get many trick or treaters.

Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Sick Of Halloween Shows? Here's Another One!

Sorry to keep bugging you with Halloween shows, but I did another one, this time for my show on KNON, & if you want to listen, you can here, on Radio Free America.

That's all.  No more Halloween.  Till next year.

Whatever shall I do a show about then?

Monday, October 29, 2018

Halloween Shows

As promised, I have collected all the Halloween shows I've digitized (from 2005 on) on one page, & made it slightly more presentable than the half-assed page I made last year.  The link is here:

The Self Help Radio Halloween Collection

There are only two episodes I haven't collected here, & they're my earliest two shows, which may not be available anymore.  (I haven't looked.)  One was a general Halloween show, the other was about ghosts.  I may recreate that one at some point.  Who knows?

As always, I can't speak for the quality of any of these shows.  I was quite fond of the voodoo show this year, but I don't really revisit my shows, so I have no idea if they're entertaining at all.

They are, however, very helpful for doing general format Halloween shows, which I will be doing tomorrow for the Tuesday Morning Blend, that's in the morning from 7-9am.

Friday, October 26, 2018

Self Help Radio 102618: Halloween 2018 - Voodoo!

(Original image here.)

Voodoo!  What is it?  I dunno!  But it makes me think of scary things!  Like witch doctors & voodoo dolls & bubbling cauldrons & potions & tinctures!  Voodoo!  Should I have given that stranger a lock of my hair?  I'll admit I was kinda flattered!  But now it feels like I have a piercing ulcer & I get strange pains up & down my back!  Voodoo!  Oh shit is this show culturally insensitive?  But it's Halloween!  Good thing almost no one knows it exists!

Two hours worth of voodoo songs + a couple of interviews with insane people + a song written by Jenny Adkins specifically for the show.  It sounds like something you might want to play at your Halloween party - especially if you want the guest to get a move on.  It's this year's Self Help Radio Halloween show & I had a blast putting it together.  It's as fun as it is scary as it is ridiculous as it is fun.

What happens on the show is noted below.  The show is at the Self Help Radio website.  There's a username (SHR) & a password (selfhelp) you'll need to listen.

Does anyone know how long a voodoo doll's power lasts?  Asking for a friend.

Self Help Radio Halloween Voodoo Show

"You've Got Me Voodoo'd" Louis Armstrong _The Complete Louis Armstrong Decca Sessions (1935-1946)_
"Voodoo Woman Blues" Jimmy Witherspoon & Jay McShann _The R&B Years 1946: Volume 2_
"Voodoo Blues" Jumpin' Joe Williams with Red Saunders & His Orchestra _The OKeh Rhythm & Blues Story 1949-1957_

introduction & explanation

"Voodoo Pappadollar" Poison Girls _Statement: The Complete Recordings_
"Voodoo Doll" The Interiors _Voodoo Doll_
"Supernatural Voodoo Woman (Part 1)" The Originals _Game Called Love_
"Oh You Voo Doo Doo Doll" Sheldon Allman _Sing Along With Drac_
"Voo Doo Woman" Smiley Smith _Horror Hop_
"Voodoo Woman" Simon Stokes & The Nightwalks _Beat It! Killer Tracks From The Roarin' 60s_

interview with voodoo opponent Father Jude O'Doole

"Voodoo Doll" Amelia _All Them Chicks At The Hop! Vol. 1_
"Voodoo" The Revillos _Rev Up_
"Voodoo Idol" The Cramps _Psychedelic Jungle_
"The Curse Of The Voodoo Doll" Joan Gerber _The Story Lady_
"Voodoo Lady" Ween _Chocolate & Cheese_
"Psychic Voodoo Doll" Deadbolt _Halloween Hootenanny_

perhaps a secret of voodoo is revealed - or is interrupted

"Mr. Voodoo" Jenny Adkins _Mr. Voodoo_
"You Do Something To Me" Johnny Mathis _Rhythms Of Broadway_
"Voodoo Plan" The Headliners _The Complete Motown Singles, Vol. 5: 1965_
"Voodoo Woman" Koko Taylor _I Got What It Takes_
"This Is Not Voodoo" Brother Russell _Radio Jihad_
"Gris Gris Gumbo Ya Ya" Dr. John _Saturday Night Fish Fry: New Orleans Funk & Soul_

interview with children's television hose Mr Spooks

"Voodoo Child (Slight Return)" Angelique Kidjo _Oremi_
"Voodoo Voodoo" LaVern Baker _Great Googa Mooga_
"Voodoo" Josie & The Pussycats _Stop, Look, & Listen: The Capitol Recordings_
"Voo Doo" Rachel Sweet _Blame It On Love_
"Voodoo Hurt" The Mar-Vels _Magic Doo Wops, Vol. 1: Halloween Songs_
"The Voo Doo Walk" Sonny Richard's Panics with Cindy & Misty _These Ghoulish Things: Horror Hits For Hallowe'en_

conclusion & goodbye

"The Voodoo Man" The Del Vikings _The Swinging, Singing Del Vikings_
"Voodoo" The Ivies _Voodoo_
"It's Your Voodoo Working" Charles Sheffield _ The Real Excello R&B_
"Voodoo Woman" Curtis Knight _Voodoo Rhythm & Blues & Burlesque Grind_
"Voodoo" The Combinations _Whip! Wobble & Grind! 1962-1964_
"Voodoo Woman" Bern Elliott & The Fenmen _The Beat Years_
"Voodoo Medicine Man" Jerry & Jeff _Le Beat Bespoké 4_