Self Help Radio 092226: Masterpiece

(clip art frame found here)

When is a radio show with the theme "masterpiece" almost certain not to be a masterpiece? Why, when that show is Self Help Radio of course!

To be fair, a song about a masterpiece is not necessarily a masterpiece. Although I suppose someone did try that once with a television show featuring plays, so....

You can listen to the show at the KBOO website & at the Self Help Radio website. Nearly everything that happened at the show is listed below.

I think I am done realizing I will never make a masterpiece now. Stupid show themes!

Self Help Radio Masterpiece Show

"Masterpiece" The Temptations _Masterpiece_

introduction & definitions

"Meister's Musical Masterpiece" Len Spencer _Greatest Hits_

"The Devil Made A Masterpiece" Johnny Horton _The Fantastic Johnny Horton_

"The Masterpiece" Johnny Cash _From Sea To Shining Sea_

"When I Paint My Masterpiece (Demo)" Bob Dylan _Another Self Portrait (1969-1971)_

"Masterpiece" Big Thief _Masterpiece_

interview with blogger Walter Cunningham

"Everbody's A Masterpiece" Rasputin Stash _Hidden Stash_

"Masterpiece" Leda Grace _Amazing_

"Portrait Of A Master Piece" The D.O.C. _No One Can Do It Better_

"The Masterpiece (Trailer)" David F. Friedman _The Best Of David F. Friedman_

"A Masterpiece" Stephen Tin Tin Duffy _The Ups & Downs_

interview with director Margo Powers & actor Jeff Heck

"Masterpiece" Jon Langford _Four Lost Souls_

"I Am A Masterpiece" James Vincent McMorrow _The Less I Knew_

"Masterpiece" Ben Harper _Wide Open Light_

"Masterpiece" Old 97's _American Primitive_

"Masterpiece" Janiva Magness _Back For Me_

interview with my art teacher Mr. Krueger

"Little Masterpiece" Mitch Friedman _Game Show Teeth_

"Pop Magic Fantastical Masterpiece" Canadian Invasion _Three Cheers For The Invisible_

"Genetic Masterpiece" Roland Blinn _Chocolates In The Box_

"Speedline Miracle Masterpiece" Tunde Adebimpe _Welcome To Los Santos_

"No Masterpiece Policy" Adam Green _Aladdin_

"They Provide The Paint For The Picture-Perfect Masterpiece That You Will Paint On The Insides Of Your Eyelids" Streetlight Manifesto _99 Songs Of Revolution: Volume One_

conclusion & goodbye

"Olav Heggland's Masterpiece (with Hallvard T. Bjorgum)" David Lindley & Henry Kaiser _The Sweet Sunny North_

"No True Masterpiece Will Ever Be Complete" Kaki King _Glow_

"Masterpiece" Flap _World Of Visions_

Whither Masterpiece?

(image found here)

At the risk of being boring (I know, too late!), I remind you that most of the ideas for themes for Self Help Radio come because I am always listening to music. Different kinds of music. Sometimes I want to relisten to something I haven't heard for a while. Sometimes something I read or see online sends me down a rabbit hole. This show starts with this album:

(image found at Discogs)

The album Masterpiece by The Temptations. I don't think I had listened to it all the way through before. & I thought as I listened to the almost fourteen-minute-long (!) title track, "Might there be lots of songs called or using the word 'masterpiece'?"

The answer to that is tonight's show. & yeah, I'll play that Temptations song in its entirety.

One this is sure tho - the show won't be a masterpiece. It'll just be another episode of Self Help Radio. Happening at midnight tonight on 90.7fm in town, kboo dot fm everywhere.

Preface To Masterpiece: A Peanuts Cartoon

When I thought about the theme "masterpiece," I had a vague recollection of this Peanuts strip from December 11, 1955. It took some time to find it! It was scanned by me from the Fantagraphics collection. I think you can find the colored version here. Please enjoy.

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: National Punch Day

(image found here)

September 20 is National Punch Day. Not that the United States has a "national punch." Perhaps it's best understood as a "National Day Of Punch." You get to choose the punch you want to consume on this day. & to spike it if you so choose. & with whatever delicious spirit as well.

Certainly we'll all be a little punchy tomorrow, Sunday. from 11am to 1pm. That's on XRAY FM, which is on 91.1+107.1fm in Portland, online everywhere at xray dot fm.

Let's hope Dick Dickenbock made enough for everyone!

This Week In Self Help: September 13 + 15

No biggie, just two shows this week. Enjoy this picture of a sunset taken in Texas many years ago.

The Dickenbock Report on XRAY FM reported on National Bald Is Beautiful Day.
Listen to that show here.

Self Help Radio on KBOO had the theme Howard Gently To Infinity.

Listen to that show here. Or listen to that show here.

More radio shows this week tho (sorry).

Self Help Radio 091526: Howard Gently To Infinity

(original outer space image by NASA found here)

My friend Russell would have turned 60 years old today. It's a bittersweet birthday present I am giving him: the very last times he appeared on Self Help Radio as the Rev Dr Howard Gently.

These shows - he was on SHR so many times that it took fourteen episodes to share every appearance - have been both difficult & comforting - how often do we get the chance after a loss to spend so much time with the person when they were being creative, funny, clever - all the things we admired about them? I wish it could've gone on forever.

But all things end & tonight's show features the last bits Russell & I made together. I did play a song from the show before each bit so it wouldn't get too monotonous for the listener. You can be that listener at either the KBOO web site or the Self Help Radio website.

Howard Gently appeared on the show at least 166 times. In the early days, Russell worried that he couldn't find enough material to keep the character funny. Despite all he was going through, he was magnificent until the very last appearance. Which was almost certainly true about him in real life too.

Love & gratitude forever. To infinity.

Self Help Radio Howard Gently To Infinity Show

"Seven African Powers" Russell Miles _Six Tunes By 'Russ'_

"Golden Ring (with Tammy Wynette)" George Jones _The Essential George Jones: The Spirit Of Country_

Howard Gently on the theme "Rings"

"Address Unknown" Marty Robbins _Country 1960-1966_

Howard Gently on the theme "Unknown"

"So Glamorous" Sam Cooke _The Complete Singles 1956-1962_

Howard Gently on the theme "Glamour"

"Birthday" Caspar Babypants _Baby Beatles!_

Howard Gently on the theme "Biorhythms"

"Alexander The Swoose (Half Swan-Half Goose)" Kay Kyser & His Orchestra _The Best Of Kay Kyser & His Orchestra_

Howard Gently on the theme "Geese"

Howard Gently on the theme "Christmas 2020"

"Private Plane" Hüsker Dü _Flip Your Wig_

Howard Gently on the theme "Privacy"

"Glow In The Dark" Iggy Pop _Free_

Howard Gently on the theme "Auras"

"Souvenirs" John Prine _Diamonds In The Rough_

Howard Gently on the theme "Souvenirs"

"Victory" Curtis Mayfield _Heartbeat_

Howard Gently on the theme "Victory"

"Sally Cinnamon" Stone Roses _The Complete Stone Roses_

Howard Gently on the theme "Cinnamon"

"Stones For Avalon" Tyrannosaurus Rex _Unicorn_

Howard Gently on the theme "Stones"

"Wally Ballou: Disaster Prone" Bob & Ray _Classic Bob & Ray: Volume 2_

Howard Gently on the theme "Disaster"

"Kids" Bill Hicks _Salvation (Oxford November 11, 1992)_

Howard Gently on the theme "Kids"

"TVC15" David Bowie _Station To Station_

Howard Gently on the theme "Holograms"

"One Night Stand" Bryan Ferry _Avonmore_

Howard Gently on the theme "One Night Only"

Howard Gently's Anniversary Message # 1

Howard Gently's Anniversary Message # 2

"Solea" Miles Davis _Sketches Of Spain_

Whither Howard Gently To Infinity?

From 2014 to 2021, my friend Russell appeared on Self Help Radio in improvised bits based on the show's theme as my spiritual mentor The Rev Dr Howard Gently. Russell left us in 2023. It was very hard, he was one of my best friends & someone I had known since I was 12 or 13. He was also the funniest person I've ever known.

Though my count is probably off, I am estimating one-hundred sixty five appearances of Howard Gently in interviews over those seven years, plus a final pair of messages he made for my twentieth anniversary show in 2022. Since his death, I have played those appearances in chronological order every three months on Self Help Radio. Tonight's episode will be the last.

You can listen tonight starting at midnight on KBOO: 90.7fm in Portland, kboo dot fm everywhere. One last time for Russell as Dr Gently to improve my show with his creativity, quick thinking, & humor.

Preface To Howard Gently To Infinity: There's Always A Last Time

This week is probably the last installment of my Howard Gently collection. My dear friend Russell appeared on many shows - nearly 170 of them - as my "spiritual mentor" in improvised bits. We lost Russell just over three years ago & I've played his appearances in chronological order every three months since then.

Since we're nearing the end of these appearances, I was thinking about the last time I saw him in person. I think it was about a month before I left for Portland. My wife & I visited with him & his wife in Dallas to say goodbye. I did return to Dallas only once before he died, but it was during my mother's memorial, & I didn't imagine I had the time to visit him - & it was deep in the pandemic & he was a germaphobe. Once I repeated something someone said about the pandemic - "We're all going to get Covid eventually." He responded, "I don't think I'll get it." & I don't think he ever did.

Russell & I as kids spent most of our time together on the phone, & as adults, since we lived far apart, we spent most of our time together chatting on the computer. We did occasionally see each when we were both living in the Dallas area, but going away was not a big barrier to our friendship.

However, I didn't think it would be the last time I'd ever seen him, but I guess most of the time we don't know it's going to be the last time. We spoke pretty regularly once I moved to Portland until the last year of his life - but I've talked about that. It makes me sad to think about that.

But I kinda wish we had said goodbye at one of our favorite places to eat, Kalachandji's in Dallas. We did eat together there probably in 2018. & that was a last time, too. Sigh.

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: National Bald Is Beautiful Day

(oh no! image from here)

Ahem. We have to tell you from the outset that, though we support & are reporting on National Bald Is Beautiful Day tomorrow on the Dickenbock Report, this is in no way stating that Dick Dickenbock is bald. He is not bald. Not that there's anything wrong with being bald. He's just not. Anyone who tells you he is bald is woefully misinformed. That's his real hair.

Understanding that, join us tomorrow, Sunday, September 13, from 11am to 1pm Portland time, to hear musical reports about baldness, as well as movie recommendations, commentary, & an investigative report. Only on XRAY FM - 91.1+107.1fm in Portland, xray dot fm everywhere.

Also Dick Dickenbock is not bald.

This Week In Self Help: September 6 & 8

Because I have no images of seaweed I dug up this picture I took in Astoria of old pilings right off the pier. Please enjoy.

My regular three shows this week went like this:
The Dickenbock Report on XRAY FM 9/6. It was Roger Waters' birthday. I played lots of covers of Pink Floyd songs, mainly from their early singles & first three albums. Listen to that show here.
Self Help Radio on KBOO 9/8. The theme was seaweed. Listen to that show here. Or. Listen to that show here.

Corporate Standardized Programming on KBOO 9/8. Music by artists we lost in April of this year. Listen to that show here (after Self Help Radio). Or. Listen to that show here.

That wasn't too painful now was it?

Self Help Radio 090826: Seaweed

When I confessed a couple days ago that I had never eaten seaweed, I didn't know that I actually had, & had seaweed in the house, like the sheet above which I unceremoniously stamped with the Self Help Radio logo. & though I have never had sushi with animal products in it, my wife has reminded me that vegan sushi places use nori which is of course seaweed. & I've eaten lots of nori. Oops.

Luckily I made a show that celebrates all kinds of seaweed so I don't seem like a hater.

You can listen to it now & whenever at both the KBOO website & the Self Help Radio website. Most everything that happened on the show is below. & that's all I really have to say about it!

Self Help Radio Seaweed Show

"Seaweed" Freddy Mitchell _Destination Beach (30 Tunes For Dancing In The Sand)_

"Seaweed" Quincy Jones _Golden Boy_

"Seaweed" Tipsy _Uh-Oh!_

introduction & definitions

"The Seaweed Song" Bob Pyle _Apples & Oranges_

"Seaweed" Fruit Bats _Mouthfuls_

"Seaweed Jam" Sarah Pirtle _Two Hands Hold The Earth_

"Dúlamán" Clannad _Dúlamán_

"Les Goémons" Serge Gainsbourg _Les Goémons_

interview with seaweed recorded Robert Wooder

"Just Another Seaweed" Millie Esperson _The Soul Of Texas Blues Women_

"Seaweed Avenue" Moon Williams _Sticks & Stones_

"Seaweed" Saul Williams _Saul Williams_

"In A Kelp Bed" Babyfat _Dragons Go Away_ 

"Seaweed" Cinnamon _Summer Meditation_

interview with spectral presence Eva

"Seaweed Shovelling Song" Mike Scott _Lion Of Love_

"Seaweed" Bilders _Cut_

"Seaweed" House Of Large Sizes _House Of Large Sizes_

"Cape Of Seaweed" The Shadow Ring _City Lights_

"Seaweed" Mount Eerie _A Crow Looked At Me_

interview with writer Gustav Bright

"Seaweedhead" Katie Lass _Hypnopomp_

"Seaweed" Hockey Dad _Dreamin'_

"Teen Dreams Of Seaweed" Tannhauser Orchestra _Low Tide_

"Seaweed" Please _1968-1969_

"Seaweed In Gears" Digital Leather _The Death Of Real_

conclusion & goodbye

"The Seaweed" Suckdog _Little Flowers Dying_

"Seaweed Men Stomp" Washington Dead Cats _Go Loco! Or Gore Away!_

"The Seaweed Song" Gnarly Love _The Long & Gnarly Road_

Whither Seaweed?

(imaged by Peter Woodard, found here)

When my friend Mark found out that the theme this week would be seaweed, he said, "Ah! The pride of Tacoma!" But I didn't find a song about or even called "Seaweed" by Seaweed so you probably won't hear a song by Seaweed on a show about seaweed.

You won't even hear the word "seaweed" in the song that inspired the show about seaweed. That's because the song that inspired the show is the song "Les Goémons" by Serge Gainsbourg. I first heard the song in translation by Mick Harvey as "Black Seaweed" but the word just means "seaweed." I was in a Gainsbourg mood a while back. Spent some time with him. Wondered if there were enough songs about seaweed to justify it as a theme for Self Help Radio.

Find out how I did tonight. From midnight to 2am. On 90.7 fm here in Portland. kboo dot fm everywhere. Maybe even under the sea.

Preface To Seaweed: Never Eaten Seaweed

Not that I know of, anyway.
As Costco this past week I saw not one but two kinds of seaweed snacks.
(The one that looked tastiest had fish flavor, & I don't eat fish.)
Come to think of it there may have been a seaweed salad in another area.
When I past the selection above, I thought I might try some seaweed.
Just for the show.
But passed on it.
Couldn't make up my mind.
& forgot something on my list & had to go back.
& didn't return to that aisle.
So. Maybe I've had seaweed like in Japanese food before.
But never on purpose.
Never have I said, "You know what? I'll have the seaweed."
You'd think someone doing a show about seaweed would have at least tried it.

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: Roger Waters' Birthday

(photo by John Rettie from here)

Roger Waters, one of the founders of rock & roll superstars Pink Floyd, was born on September 6, 1943. In honor of his 83rd birthday, the staff of the Report will celebrate him by playing lots of covers of Pink Floyd songs - all from their early singles & their first three albums. The staff of the Report are music snobs. Dick Dickenbock will just read what they write for him.

That's Sunday, from 11am to 1pm, on XRAY FM - 91.1+107.1fm in Portland, xray dot fm everywhere. Set your radio controls to the heart of PDX.

This Week In Self Help: August 30 + September 1

Those upside-down drinking vessels invite you to a useless list of the radio shows I did this week.

Sunday August 30 was International Bat Night so I played bat songs on The Dickenbock Report on XRAY FM. You can listen to that show here.

September 1 I explored the theme "vessel" on Self Help Radio on KBOO. You can listen to that show here. Or you can listen to that show here.

Also September 1 I played a lot of new releases on Corporate Standardized Programming on KBOO. You can listen to that show here (after Self Help Radio). Or you can listen to that show here.

That was pretty painless right? Have a drink from your favorite vessel.