This Week In Self Help: October 11 13 + 15

(image found here)

What did I do on the radio this week? Who wants to know?

Sunday October 11. It's My Party Day on The Dickenbock Report on XRAY.
Listen to the show here.

Tuesday October 13. A show about chariots on Self Help Radio on KBOO.
Listen to the show here. Or download the show here.

Tuesday October 13. Corporate Standardized Programming on KBOO. More artists we lost this year celebrated.
Listen to the show here (after Self Help Radio). Or download the show here.

Thursday October 15. Welcome To Your Good Day on XRAY. I sub one more time.

Listen to the show here.

Also I did a show on KBOO today but I'll mention it next week.

Self Help Radio 101326: Chariots

(original image found here)

Here is my show about chariots. Listening to the show, I realized I have never ridden in a chariot. I don't know if I'd want to, but I kinda wish someone would have at some point offered me a ride in a chariot. I've actually only ridden a horse once, & it wasn't that much fun. But a chariot - especially as a passenger - might have been exciting. Oh well.

Listen to the show if you wanna at the Self Help Radio website or at the KBOO website. Most everything that happened on the show is listed below.

Seriously, if you have a chariot, invite me along, willya?

Self Help Radio Chariots Show

"Swingin' At The Chariot" Anthony & The Sophomores _Play Our Oldies Mr. D.J._

"Some Trust In Chariots" Rod McKuen _The Loner & 13 Other Rod McKuen Songs Of Love & Loneliness_

"Horses & Chariots" The Open Mind _The Open Mind_

introduction & definitions

"Chariots Of Silk" Tyrannosaurus Rex _Unicorn_

"Painted Chariot" The Incredible String Band _Liquid Acrobat As Regards The Air_

"Roll The Old Chariot (feat. Mary Benson)" Louis Killen, Stan Hugill, & The X-Seamen's Institute _Sea Songs_

"General Chariot Corp." Bob Newhart _The Button-Down Mind On TV_

"Broken Chariot" CocoRosie _Tales Of A GrassWidow_

interview with Ben Howard, who was a chariot maker in his past lives

"Chariots Of The Gods" The Stampeders _From The Fire_

"Chariots Of The Gods" Russell Miles _Archaeology_

"The Chariot" Janis King _Tarot Mastery: Decoding The Tarot With Definitive Card Meanings_

"Chariot" Beach House _B-Sides & Rarities_

"Chariots" Horse Jumper Of Love _Natural Part_

interview with Buddy Howard, who owns a chariot

"Chariot" Aoife Nessa Frances _Protector_

"Chariot" Babehoven _Water's Here In You_

"The Chariot Race" Ben Blur _The Chariot Race_

"The Chariot" The Cat Empire _The Cat Empire_

"Chariot Rock (feat. Genesis Blu)" Free Radicals _White Power Outage Volume 1_

a discussion about the most famous chariot song of all

"Swing Low, Sweet Chariot" Paul Robeson _On My Journey: Paul Robeson's Independent Recordings_

"Swing Low, Sweet Chariot" Langston Hughes _The Glory Of Negro History_

"Let Me Ride (Swing Down Chariot)" The Staple Singers _Chicago Hit Factory - The Vee Jay Story 1953-1966_

"Good News (Chariot's Comin')" The Four Tunes _The Complete Jubilee Sessions_

"Sweet Chariots" Bid _The Monochrome Set: Volume, Contrast, Brilliance... (Sessions & Singles Vol. 1)_

conclusion & goodbye

"Chariots On Fire" Rocket From The Crypt _All Systems Go III_

"Chariot" Knife & Fork _The Higher You Get, The Rarer The Vegetation_

"Chariot" Professor & Maryann _Runaway Favorite_

"Charioteers" Social Studies _Wind Up Wooden Heart_

Whither Chariots?

(photo by Giovanni Dall'Orto from Wikipedia)

Why do a show about chariots, you might wonder. Is it because of having heard one of the literally hundreds of versions of "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot" out there? No. Is it because I either watched the film or heard the soundtrack recently for Chariots Of Fire? No. Oh no Gary is it because you someone found yourself reading the pseudoscientific book Chariots Of The Gods? Is that it? Oh say it isn't so!

In case you have never heard of that book, which came out the year I was born, let me tell you, it was written by a Swiss author named Erich Von Däniken & Wikipedia adds the delightful fact that "The book was extensively rewritten by its editor, Wilhelm Roggersdorf," Ouch,

Here's the thesis, courtesy of the Wikipedia: "The main thesis of Chariots Of The Gods is that extraterrestrial beings influenced ancient technology. Von Däniken suggests that some ancient structures & artifacts appear to reflect more sophisticated technological knowledge than is known or presumed to have existed at the times they were manufactured. Von Däniken maintains that these artifacts were produced either by extraterrestrial visitors or by humans who learned the necessary knowledge from extraterrestrials."

So, you're thinking, it's also a little racist? Yeah.

But no, I wasn't reading the book. It was one of the books my friend Russell was fascinated by as a kid - the sort of thing his character Howard Gently would later make fun of. Before I did the last Howard Gently show a month ago, I re-listened to Russell's album from 1984 called Archaeology on which he has a song called (you guessed it) "Chariot Of The Gods." I wanted to play it on the radio & thought I might find more songs about chariots. & so I have.

The chariots show airs tonight on KBOO - 90.7fm in town, kboo dot fm everywhere - from midnight to 2am. Thankfully my show is so amateurish no one has ever suspected aliens are actually behind it!

Preface To Chariots: Chariot Racing

(Still from Ben Hur grabbed at the link I mention in the post.)

At some point in the childhood of the average American kid in the 1970s, you got to watch Ben Hur on television. We were poor so didn't have a color television so the first time I saw it - probably in a very edited version chock full of commercials - I didn't see it in glorious color. & by the time I saw it, the movie had been around for almost twenty years, so all the elements of the race had been parodied many times over - especially in cartoons. Still, I do recall being thrilled by the race & looking forward to it when I saw it again. You can watch all of it on You Tube.

It's not the reason I'm doing a show about chariots - I'll talk about that tomorrow - but it's one of the first things I think about when I hear the word "chariot" - & maybe it is for you, too.

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: It's My Party Day

October 11 is "It's My Party Day" & although Dick Dickenbock has been uninvited to more parties than any other human alive, he still thinks the Report should report on parties - including interviewing a party planner. He knows that if he plans the party, the staff & crew of the Report will feel obligated to come.

Find out all about parties on Sunday, October 11, from 11am to 1pm, on XRAY FM - on the air at 91.1+107.1fm in Portland, but available everywhere at xray dot fm.

This Week In Self Help: October 4 6 + 8

You can tell by the unopened packages of individually sliced vegan cheeses that it's time for me to tell you the dumb radio I made this past week. Why are they stored by the window tho?

Sunday 10/4 Dickenbock Report XRAY. National Vodka Day. Listen here.

Tuesday 10/6 Self Help Radio KBOO. Anniversary show! The theme "cheese" revisited. Listen here. Or you can download the show here.

Tuesday 10/6 Corporate Standardized Programming KBOO. New releases. Listen here (after Self Help Radio). Or you can download the show here.

Thursday 10/8 Welcome To Your Good Day XRAY. A sub show. Listen here.

Maybe I'm trying to see if vegan cheese can melt?

Self Help Radio 100626: Cheese Revisited - The 24th Anniversary Show

24 years! That's a lot of cheese.

Luckily I keep myself very busy or else it might be weird to ponder twenty-four years of this nonsense. When I was a kid, I could never finish anything - I had dozens of home-made comics I started but never go to the end - & these were just four pages! (One piece of paper folder in half.) (I liked making the cover most of all.) So doing this one thing for 24 years - who the hell knows how many episodes - it's something like an achievement I guess.

Anyway, if you wanna listen to this show you can visit the show's page at KBOO or visit the Self Help Radio website. Most everything that happened on the show is below.

Fingers crossed I won't be doing this twenty-four more years. Eeek.

Self Help Radio Cheese Anniversary Show

"I Like Stinky Cheese" Dick 'Two Ton' Baker _The Music Maker Of Chicago_

"(I Got A Disease) I'm Addicted To Cheese" Evaporators _Ripple Rock_

"I Like Cheese" The Cheese Band _Party Fun With Recorders Volume 1_

introduction & old audio clip - featuring Kim & Phillip

"The Cheese Song" Kirk Moore _Top Hits_

"Cheese" Cyril Ornadel & Hal Shaper _Treasure Island_

"The Cheese Song" Mick Kolassa _Americana Essentials_

"Cheese Shop" Monty Python _The Monty Python Matching Tie & Handkerchief_

"Cheese & Crackers" The Two Man Gentlemen Band _Two At A Time_

"Cheese & Crackers" Rosco Gordon _Rosco's Rhythm_

interview with Maxine & Stewart, former Cheese Kids

"Limburger Lover" Leona Anderson _Music To Suffer By_

"The Cheese Song" Bubboon's Tunes _The Kids Corner: 20th Anniversary Celebration_

"Cheese, Peas, Pickles, & Bananas" Nora O'Connor & Steve Frisbie _The Bottle Let Me Down (Songs For Bumpy Wagon Rides)_

"Bunnyrabbits, Satan, Cheese, & Milk" Stark Effect _Mic In Track_

"(Ooey Gooey) Green Cheese" Freddie Montell _Destination Forbidden Planet (37 Outer Space Shock Treatments)_

"Green Cheese" Merle Travis _Guitar Rags & A Too Fast Past_

our favorite librarian Carole stops by!

"The Cheese Boogie Deluxe" The Oosik Music Company _Slow Musicians Playing_

"Cheese & Wine" Waste Of Aces _Perfect Day_

"Cheese & Onions" Galaxie 500 _Rutles Highway Revisited (A Tribute To The Rutles)_

"The Cheese Alarm" Robyn Hitchcock _Jewels For Sophia_

"Grilled Cheese" Cherry Glazerr _Haxel Princess_

"Crackers & Cheese" The Jangleberries _Top Of The Pops With Murray Walker_

interview with farmer Don Conelly

"Rats Been On My Cheese" Walter Vincson _Complete Recorded Works In Chronological Order (1928-1941)_

"Cheese All Week Long" Oscar Boyd _Cheese All Week Long_

"Welfare Cheese" Emanual Laskey _Shakin' Fit_

"Cheesies & Gum" Martha & The Muffins _Metro Music_

"Cheese" Jim Gaffigan _The Last Supper_

"American Cheese" Electric Six _Zodiac_

conclusion & goodbye

"Cheese & Toast" BMX Bandits _My Chain_

"Chips & Cheese, Pint Of Wine" MJ Hibbett _A Million Ukeleles_

"People Are Asleep, Dreaming Of Cheese" Cornell Hurd Band _A Stagecoach Named Desire_

"All-American Cheesecake" Super _Seven Summers (International Pop Volume Two)_

Whither Cheese Revisited (The 24th Anniversary Show)?

The answer to the question "why is this week's theme 'cheese'?" is answered in the parenthetical remark: it's an anniversary show.

At some point, when it became obvious I might be doing Self Help Radio for a while, I decided to revisit themes on my anniversary shows. My first anniversary show - meaning, the first show where I revisited a theme, not the show's first anniversary - happened in 2008, when the show was but six years old. I guess I had really wanted to revisit a theme. Or commemorate the show somehow - after all, I did not know I would still be doing it after even six years.

This year I decided to revisit a theme I explored in April of 2008. It was the first of the last four shows I did on KOOP, the station where the show originated. Though I did in fact stay in Austin for another year due to a change of plans, I didn't return to KOOP that last year. I did the show as a "podcast" which no one really listened to. The show wouldn't return to the air until the summer of 2009 when it premiered on WMUL in Huntington, Virginia.

Back in 2008, I did eat cheese made from dairy. I no longer do that. I am very lucky to live in Portland where non-dairy cheeses can be found almost everywhere - especially on pizza. The pizza game in Portland is strong. I don't feel weird about doing a show that is mostly about something I no longer eat because I have very fond memories of cheese. I don't miss it - I don't have to! - but I do know when I did the show in 2008 my diet was probably 65% cheese.

& yes, the first Self Help Radio aired around this time in Austin in 2002. So it is indeed the 24th anniversary show. Maybe I'm hoping for pictures? & someone will tell me, "Say cheese!"

It happens tonight on KBOO from midnight to 2am. That's 90.7fm in town, kboo dot fm everywhere. Come for the cheese, stay for the music.

Preface To Cheese Revisited (The 24th Anniversary Show): Swissland Cheese Co.

On September 20, 2015 - almost exactly eleven years ago - we were driving home from Fort Wayne, Indiana (home then was Lexington, Kentucky) down state highway 27 - I wanted to see more of the state, so we didn't go back the way we came, up I-75 in Ohio - & I snapped this picture. We didn't stop because I'm certain the Swissland Cheese Co. had only dairy cheeses, & neither me or my wife ate those anymore.

On April 4, 2008, from 4:30 to 6pm, I was on the air on KOOP in Austin, hosting the the fourth-to-the-last episode of Self Help Radio that would air on the station - the station where it originated almost six years earlier. At the time, I thought I'd be leaving Austin in mere months - it turns out it took a little longer.

Self Help Radio premiered on October 9, 2002. Almost exactly twenty-four years ago. I have written about how I didn't know I'd still be doing the show so many years later. My only previous radio experience on KVRX lasted barely five years. But though I left Austin in 2009, I brought Self Help Radio with me, & of course I still do it here in Portland duh,

On my anniversary shows, I like to repeat old themes. On April 4, 2008, the theme was "cheese." It seemed a nice idea to return to that theme. & so I shall.

Some more thoughts on anniversaries & the like tomorrow.

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: National Vodka Day

October 4 is National Vodka Day. While The Dickenbock Report does not encourage drinking, & in fact will show you are the horrific facts of how alcohol ruins lives, we also have an obligation to report the news. So don't blame us for anything bad happening relating to vodka, okay? You didn't blame Walter Cronkite for the Vietnam War, did you? Sheesh.

It's happening Sunday, October 4, from 11am to 1pm on XRAY - 91.1+107.1fm in Portland, xray dot fm everywhere. Please. Listen responsibly.

This Week In Self Help: September 27 + 29 & October 1

Not sure where I found that photo - reverse image search is not being helpful - but there's some information about the Globe Of Death motorcycle act here. Here's what my radio week was like:

September 27 was National Scarf Day. I did a show about scarves on The Dickenbock Report on XRAY. You can listen to that show here.

September 29 on Self Help Radio I did a show with the theme "globes" on KBOO. You can listen to that show here. Or you can listen to that show here.

Also on September 29 on KBOO I had an episode of Corporate Standardized Programming featuring artists we lost in April of this year. You can listen to that show here (after Self Help Radio). Or you can listen to that show here.

Finally, on October 1 I subbed Welcome To Your Good Day on XRAY. You can listen to that show here.

Anyway, if you need me, I'll probably be spinning round the globe of death.

Self Help Radio 092926: Globes

In a radio show about globes, there's lots of music plus silly interviews. It's an episode of Self Help Radio. I found that globe one day on someone's lawn. & took a picture of it. Now I wish I had turned it over or something but at the time I liked that it had Antarctica at the top. The Self Help Radio logo is covering a hole, so it obviously was once on the bottom. There's sure a lot of water on this planet of ours.

You can listen while spinning your own globe now at either the KBOO web page or the Self Help Radio web page. Everything that happened on the show is listed below. Or mostly everything.

Guess I don't have much more to say about globes!

Self Help Radio Globes Show

"The Globe" Big Audio Dynamite II _The Globe_

"Mental Floss For The Globe" Urban Dance Squad _Mental Floss For The Globe_

"Digital Globe" Richard H. Kirk _Earlier/Later (Unreleased Projects Anthology 74-89)_

introduction & definitions

"Dark Globe" Syd Barrett _The Madcap Laughs_

"Globe Of Frogs" Robyn Hitchcock & The Egyptians _Luminous Groove_

"Roads Girdle The Globe" XTC _Drums & Wires_

"The Inflatable Globe" Theodore Spencer _An Album Of Modern Poetry British & American: An Anthology Read By The Poets_

"Sheet Metal Globe Stand" Nel Aspinal _The Romans' Map To Heaven_

interview with geomancer Chase Lassiter

"Travelling The Face Of The Globe" Oi Va Voi _Travelling The Face Of The Globe_

"Globetrotter" Kiala & The Afroblaster _Money_

"Roun' The Globe" Nappy Roots _Wooden Leather_

"One Of The Fairest Portions Of The Globe" Adam Arkin _Lewis & Clark: The Journey Of The Corps Of Discovery (Original Soundtrack Recording)_

"Bright Green Globe" Down By Law _Punkrockacademyfightsong_ 

interview with globetrotter Trick Hooper

"Snow Globe" Crayon _Brick Factory_

"Snowglobe" Secret Shine _There Is Only Now_

"Snow Globe World" Spinning Cat & Anthony Fonseca _Random Acts: Poems & Musical Interludes_

"Snowglobe" Ada Lea _When I Paint My Masterpiece_

"Snow Globes" Black Country, New Road _Ants From Up There_

interview with globemaker Noah Cruise

"Glimmer Globe" Shampoo _We Are Shampoo_

"Globe Alone" Blur _The Great Escape_

"Holding All The Globes" Boat _50 Sweaty Boat Fans Can't Be Wrong: The Early Recordings Volume 1_

"Queen Of Globes & Mirrors" Sharp Pins _Balloon Balloon Balloon_

"Globe Spinning" The Church _Further/Deeper_

conclusion/goodbye

"You're My Globe" Colleen & Paul _Colleen & Paul_

"The Globe" Ben Sollee _Inclusions_

"The Globe" Ruby Goon _Brand New Power_

Whither Globes?

(image by Marc Johns)

A show about globes was in the works for a while (I was actually mainly thinking of the word "global"), but it was given a push by the recent death of Tim Curry. On a dog walk after his death, I asked my wife if she had ever seen The Rocky Horror Picture Show in a theater with the audience participating. I described some of the things one might expect - approaching someone who had never been there & when they admitted it, calling them "virgin!"; the "say it!" when Frank N. Furter is saying "anticipation"; "Damn it, Janet, you're a slut!"; & one of the most charming things I saw when I first watched the movie in the theater when I was all of 17 years old - the bit at the beginning with the globe where members of the audience in unison help start the globe moving on the screen.

If you've seen it, you know what I mean, & if you haven't, & I am describing it poorly, it doesn't matter. There's a globe in the movie, it spins, it caused me to think about doing a show about globes, & that's how tonight's show came about.

There'll probably be no mention of Rocky Horror tho. Tune in tonight at midnight as Self Help Radio explores the theme "globes." It's on 12-2am on 90.7fm in Portland & everywhere at kboo dot fm. Tell me where, I'll find you on a globe.

Also RIP Tim Curry. What a talent.

Preface To Globes: The Pleasure Of Globes

A confession: I do not know where that image comes from. I downloaded it probably on Tumblr many moons ago. I do know it was taken by George W. Gardner & was apparently in a documentary at some point. But looking at that picture made me remember being a child & loving to look at globes.

Mainly in the library at school - we didn't have a globe at home. Staring at the globe, spinning it, tracing a line - an arc I guess - from where I was in Texas down past the equator to end up - where? Africa? The middle of the Atlantic Ocean? Australia? Then back up to China!

It's probably obvious I was a pretty dumb kid but I did love to pretend & even now my brain can't wrap itself around the idea we're on a round planet that rotates & as it does circles a star that's so huge but so far away it doesn't appear huge to us. A globe helps my brain. That's why they're such a joy.

& why don't I have a globe as big as the one in that picture? I don't have any room to put it in my house but boy do I want a globe that large!

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: National Scarf Day

September 27 is National Scarf Day & not a moment too soon! It's getting cold in Portland & you're not allowed to wear scarves around here under after National Scarf Day. & just speaking for the Dickenbock Report staff, there was been some very cold necks these past few weeks - especially those of us who ride our bikes to work! Brrrr!

Listen to musical reports & more about scarves tomorrow, Sunday, September 27, from 11am to 1pm on XRAY FM - 91.1+107.1fm in Portland, xray dot fm everywhere. & then go wild with the scarves!

This Week In Self Help: September 18 20 + 22

Above is the collage of releases I played on the Songcircle last week. I didn't get it made in time for the show. I seem to be constantly falling behind these days.

But the past week?

9/18 The Songcircle on KBOO. Lots of new releases. Listen here.

9/20 The Dickenbock Report on XRAY. National Punch Day. Listen here.

9/22 Self Help Radio on KBOO. The theme was "masterpiece." Listen here. Or listen here.

9/22 Corporate Standardized Programming on KBOO. Lots more new releases. Listen here (after Self Help Radio). Or listen here.

Hope I can catch up someday. Know I won't. But hope I can.

Self Help Radio 092226: Masterpiece

(clip art frame found here)

When is a radio show with the theme "masterpiece" almost certain not to be a masterpiece? Why, when that show is Self Help Radio of course!

To be fair, a song about a masterpiece is not necessarily a masterpiece. Although I suppose someone did try that once with a television show featuring plays, so....

You can listen to the show at the KBOO website & at the Self Help Radio website. Nearly everything that happened at the show is listed below.

I think I am done realizing I will never make a masterpiece now. Stupid show themes!

Self Help Radio Masterpiece Show

"Masterpiece" The Temptations _Masterpiece_

introduction & definitions

"Meister's Musical Masterpiece" Len Spencer _Greatest Hits_

"The Devil Made A Masterpiece" Johnny Horton _The Fantastic Johnny Horton_

"The Masterpiece" Johnny Cash _From Sea To Shining Sea_

"When I Paint My Masterpiece (Demo)" Bob Dylan _Another Self Portrait (1969-1971)_

"Masterpiece" Big Thief _Masterpiece_

interview with blogger Walter Cunningham

"Everbody's A Masterpiece" Rasputin Stash _Hidden Stash_

"Masterpiece" Leda Grace _Amazing_

"Portrait Of A Master Piece" The D.O.C. _No One Can Do It Better_

"The Masterpiece (Trailer)" David F. Friedman _The Best Of David F. Friedman_

"A Masterpiece" Stephen Tin Tin Duffy _The Ups & Downs_

interview with director Margo Powers & actor Jeff Heck

"Masterpiece" Jon Langford _Four Lost Souls_

"I Am A Masterpiece" James Vincent McMorrow _The Less I Knew_

"Masterpiece" Ben Harper _Wide Open Light_

"Masterpiece" Old 97's _American Primitive_

"Masterpiece" Janiva Magness _Back For Me_

interview with my art teacher Mr. Krueger

"Little Masterpiece" Mitch Friedman _Game Show Teeth_

"Pop Magic Fantastical Masterpiece" Canadian Invasion _Three Cheers For The Invisible_

"Genetic Masterpiece" Roland Blinn _Chocolates In The Box_

"Speedline Miracle Masterpiece" Tunde Adebimpe _Welcome To Los Santos_

"No Masterpiece Policy" Adam Green _Aladdin_

"They Provide The Paint For The Picture-Perfect Masterpiece That You Will Paint On The Insides Of Your Eyelids" Streetlight Manifesto _99 Songs Of Revolution: Volume One_

conclusion & goodbye

"Olav Heggland's Masterpiece (with Hallvard T. Bjorgum)" David Lindley & Henry Kaiser _The Sweet Sunny North_

"No True Masterpiece Will Ever Be Complete" Kaki King _Glow_

"Masterpiece" Flap _World Of Visions_

Whither Masterpiece?

(image found here)

At the risk of being boring (I know, too late!), I remind you that most of the ideas for themes for Self Help Radio come because I am always listening to music. Different kinds of music. Sometimes I want to relisten to something I haven't heard for a while. Sometimes something I read or see online sends me down a rabbit hole. This show starts with this album:

(image found at Discogs)

The album Masterpiece by The Temptations. I don't think I had listened to it all the way through before. & I thought as I listened to the almost fourteen-minute-long (!) title track, "Might there be lots of songs called or using the word 'masterpiece'?"

The answer to that is tonight's show. & yeah, I'll play that Temptations song in its entirety.

One this is sure tho - the show won't be a masterpiece. It'll just be another episode of Self Help Radio. Happening at midnight tonight on 90.7fm in town, kboo dot fm everywhere.

Preface To Masterpiece: A Peanuts Cartoon

When I thought about the theme "masterpiece," I had a vague recollection of this Peanuts strip from December 11, 1955. It took some time to find it! It was scanned by me from the Fantagraphics collection. I think you can find the colored version here. Please enjoy.

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: National Punch Day

(image found here)

September 20 is National Punch Day. Not that the United States has a "national punch." Perhaps it's best understood as a "National Day Of Punch." You get to choose the punch you want to consume on this day. & to spike it if you so choose. & with whatever delicious spirit as well.

Certainly we'll all be a little punchy tomorrow, Sunday. from 11am to 1pm. That's on XRAY FM, which is on 91.1+107.1fm in Portland, online everywhere at xray dot fm.

Let's hope Dick Dickenbock made enough for everyone!

This Week In Self Help: September 13 + 15

No biggie, just two shows this week. Enjoy this picture of a sunset taken in Texas many years ago.

The Dickenbock Report on XRAY FM reported on National Bald Is Beautiful Day.
Listen to that show here.

Self Help Radio on KBOO had the theme Howard Gently To Infinity.

Listen to that show here. Or listen to that show here.

More radio shows this week tho (sorry).

Self Help Radio 091526: Howard Gently To Infinity

(original outer space image by NASA found here)

My friend Russell would have turned 60 years old today. It's a bittersweet birthday present I am giving him: the very last times he appeared on Self Help Radio as the Rev Dr Howard Gently.

These shows - he was on SHR so many times that it took fourteen episodes to share every appearance - have been both difficult & comforting - how often do we get the chance after a loss to spend so much time with the person when they were being creative, funny, clever - all the things we admired about them? I wish it could've gone on forever.

But all things end & tonight's show features the last bits Russell & I made together. I did play a song from the show before each bit so it wouldn't get too monotonous for the listener. You can be that listener at either the KBOO web site or the Self Help Radio website.

Howard Gently appeared on the show at least 166 times. In the early days, Russell worried that he couldn't find enough material to keep the character funny. Despite all he was going through, he was magnificent until the very last appearance. Which was almost certainly true about him in real life too.

Love & gratitude forever. To infinity.

Self Help Radio Howard Gently To Infinity Show

"Seven African Powers" Russell Miles _Six Tunes By 'Russ'_

"Golden Ring (with Tammy Wynette)" George Jones _The Essential George Jones: The Spirit Of Country_

Howard Gently on the theme "Rings"

"Address Unknown" Marty Robbins _Country 1960-1966_

Howard Gently on the theme "Unknown"

"So Glamorous" Sam Cooke _The Complete Singles 1956-1962_

Howard Gently on the theme "Glamour"

"Birthday" Caspar Babypants _Baby Beatles!_

Howard Gently on the theme "Biorhythms"

"Alexander The Swoose (Half Swan-Half Goose)" Kay Kyser & His Orchestra _The Best Of Kay Kyser & His Orchestra_

Howard Gently on the theme "Geese"

Howard Gently on the theme "Christmas 2020"

"Private Plane" Hüsker Dü _Flip Your Wig_

Howard Gently on the theme "Privacy"

"Glow In The Dark" Iggy Pop _Free_

Howard Gently on the theme "Auras"

"Souvenirs" John Prine _Diamonds In The Rough_

Howard Gently on the theme "Souvenirs"

"Victory" Curtis Mayfield _Heartbeat_

Howard Gently on the theme "Victory"

"Sally Cinnamon" Stone Roses _The Complete Stone Roses_

Howard Gently on the theme "Cinnamon"

"Stones For Avalon" Tyrannosaurus Rex _Unicorn_

Howard Gently on the theme "Stones"

"Wally Ballou: Disaster Prone" Bob & Ray _Classic Bob & Ray: Volume 2_

Howard Gently on the theme "Disaster"

"Kids" Bill Hicks _Salvation (Oxford November 11, 1992)_

Howard Gently on the theme "Kids"

"TVC15" David Bowie _Station To Station_

Howard Gently on the theme "Holograms"

"One Night Stand" Bryan Ferry _Avonmore_

Howard Gently on the theme "One Night Only"

Howard Gently's Anniversary Message # 1

Howard Gently's Anniversary Message # 2

"Solea" Miles Davis _Sketches Of Spain_

Whither Howard Gently To Infinity?

From 2014 to 2021, my friend Russell appeared on Self Help Radio in improvised bits based on the show's theme as my spiritual mentor The Rev Dr Howard Gently. Russell left us in 2023. It was very hard, he was one of my best friends & someone I had known since I was 12 or 13. He was also the funniest person I've ever known.

Though my count is probably off, I am estimating one-hundred sixty five appearances of Howard Gently in interviews over those seven years, plus a final pair of messages he made for my twentieth anniversary show in 2022. Since his death, I have played those appearances in chronological order every three months on Self Help Radio. Tonight's episode will be the last.

You can listen tonight starting at midnight on KBOO: 90.7fm in Portland, kboo dot fm everywhere. One last time for Russell as Dr Gently to improve my show with his creativity, quick thinking, & humor.

Preface To Howard Gently To Infinity: There's Always A Last Time

This week is probably the last installment of my Howard Gently collection. My dear friend Russell appeared on many shows - nearly 170 of them - as my "spiritual mentor" in improvised bits. We lost Russell just over three years ago & I've played his appearances in chronological order every three months since then.

Since we're nearing the end of these appearances, I was thinking about the last time I saw him in person. I think it was about a month before I left for Portland. My wife & I visited with him & his wife in Dallas to say goodbye. I did return to Dallas only once before he died, but it was during my mother's memorial, & I didn't imagine I had the time to visit him - & it was deep in the pandemic & he was a germaphobe. Once I repeated something someone said about the pandemic - "We're all going to get Covid eventually." He responded, "I don't think I'll get it." & I don't think he ever did.

Russell & I as kids spent most of our time together on the phone, & as adults, since we lived far apart, we spent most of our time together chatting on the computer. We did occasionally see each when we were both living in the Dallas area, but going away was not a big barrier to our friendship.

However, I didn't think it would be the last time I'd ever seen him, but I guess most of the time we don't know it's going to be the last time. We spoke pretty regularly once I moved to Portland until the last year of his life - but I've talked about that. It makes me sad to think about that.

But I kinda wish we had said goodbye at one of our favorite places to eat, Kalachandji's in Dallas. We did eat together there probably in 2018. & that was a last time, too. Sigh.

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: National Bald Is Beautiful Day

(oh no! image from here)

Ahem. We have to tell you from the outset that, though we support & are reporting on National Bald Is Beautiful Day tomorrow on the Dickenbock Report, this is in no way stating that Dick Dickenbock is bald. He is not bald. Not that there's anything wrong with being bald. He's just not. Anyone who tells you he is bald is woefully misinformed. That's his real hair.

Understanding that, join us tomorrow, Sunday, September 13, from 11am to 1pm Portland time, to hear musical reports about baldness, as well as movie recommendations, commentary, & an investigative report. Only on XRAY FM - 91.1+107.1fm in Portland, xray dot fm everywhere.

Also Dick Dickenbock is not bald.

This Week In Self Help: September 6 & 8

Because I have no images of seaweed I dug up this picture I took in Astoria of old pilings right off the pier. Please enjoy.

My regular three shows this week went like this:
The Dickenbock Report on XRAY FM 9/6. It was Roger Waters' birthday. I played lots of covers of Pink Floyd songs, mainly from their early singles & first three albums. Listen to that show here.
Self Help Radio on KBOO 9/8. The theme was seaweed. Listen to that show here. Or. Listen to that show here.

Corporate Standardized Programming on KBOO 9/8. Music by artists we lost in April of this year. Listen to that show here (after Self Help Radio). Or. Listen to that show here.

That wasn't too painful now was it?

Self Help Radio 090826: Seaweed

When I confessed a couple days ago that I had never eaten seaweed, I didn't know that I actually had, & had seaweed in the house, like the sheet above which I unceremoniously stamped with the Self Help Radio logo. & though I have never had sushi with animal products in it, my wife has reminded me that vegan sushi places use nori which is of course seaweed. & I've eaten lots of nori. Oops.

Luckily I made a show that celebrates all kinds of seaweed so I don't seem like a hater.

You can listen to it now & whenever at both the KBOO website & the Self Help Radio website. Most everything that happened on the show is below. & that's all I really have to say about it!

Self Help Radio Seaweed Show

"Seaweed" Freddy Mitchell _Destination Beach (30 Tunes For Dancing In The Sand)_

"Seaweed" Quincy Jones _Golden Boy_

"Seaweed" Tipsy _Uh-Oh!_

introduction & definitions

"The Seaweed Song" Bob Pyle _Apples & Oranges_

"Seaweed" Fruit Bats _Mouthfuls_

"Seaweed Jam" Sarah Pirtle _Two Hands Hold The Earth_

"Dúlamán" Clannad _Dúlamán_

"Les Goémons" Serge Gainsbourg _Les Goémons_

interview with seaweed recorded Robert Wooder

"Just Another Seaweed" Millie Esperson _The Soul Of Texas Blues Women_

"Seaweed Avenue" Moon Williams _Sticks & Stones_

"Seaweed" Saul Williams _Saul Williams_

"In A Kelp Bed" Babyfat _Dragons Go Away_ 

"Seaweed" Cinnamon _Summer Meditation_

interview with spectral presence Eva

"Seaweed Shovelling Song" Mike Scott _Lion Of Love_

"Seaweed" Bilders _Cut_

"Seaweed" House Of Large Sizes _House Of Large Sizes_

"Cape Of Seaweed" The Shadow Ring _City Lights_

"Seaweed" Mount Eerie _A Crow Looked At Me_

interview with writer Gustav Bright

"Seaweedhead" Katie Lass _Hypnopomp_

"Seaweed" Hockey Dad _Dreamin'_

"Teen Dreams Of Seaweed" Tannhauser Orchestra _Low Tide_

"Seaweed" Please _1968-1969_

"Seaweed In Gears" Digital Leather _The Death Of Real_

conclusion & goodbye

"The Seaweed" Suckdog _Little Flowers Dying_

"Seaweed Men Stomp" Washington Dead Cats _Go Loco! Or Gore Away!_

"The Seaweed Song" Gnarly Love _The Long & Gnarly Road_

Whither Seaweed?

(imaged by Peter Woodard, found here)

When my friend Mark found out that the theme this week would be seaweed, he said, "Ah! The pride of Tacoma!" But I didn't find a song about or even called "Seaweed" by Seaweed so you probably won't hear a song by Seaweed on a show about seaweed.

You won't even hear the word "seaweed" in the song that inspired the show about seaweed. That's because the song that inspired the show is the song "Les Goémons" by Serge Gainsbourg. I first heard the song in translation by Mick Harvey as "Black Seaweed" but the word just means "seaweed." I was in a Gainsbourg mood a while back. Spent some time with him. Wondered if there were enough songs about seaweed to justify it as a theme for Self Help Radio.

Find out how I did tonight. From midnight to 2am. On 90.7 fm here in Portland. kboo dot fm everywhere. Maybe even under the sea.

Preface To Seaweed: Never Eaten Seaweed

Not that I know of, anyway.
As Costco this past week I saw not one but two kinds of seaweed snacks.
(The one that looked tastiest had fish flavor, & I don't eat fish.)
Come to think of it there may have been a seaweed salad in another area.
When I past the selection above, I thought I might try some seaweed.
Just for the show.
But passed on it.
Couldn't make up my mind.
& forgot something on my list & had to go back.
& didn't return to that aisle.
So. Maybe I've had seaweed like in Japanese food before.
But never on purpose.
Never have I said, "You know what? I'll have the seaweed."
You'd think someone doing a show about seaweed would have at least tried it.

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: Roger Waters' Birthday

(photo by John Rettie from here)

Roger Waters, one of the founders of rock & roll superstars Pink Floyd, was born on September 6, 1943. In honor of his 83rd birthday, the staff of the Report will celebrate him by playing lots of covers of Pink Floyd songs - all from their early singles & their first three albums. The staff of the Report are music snobs. Dick Dickenbock will just read what they write for him.

That's Sunday, from 11am to 1pm, on XRAY FM - 91.1+107.1fm in Portland, xray dot fm everywhere. Set your radio controls to the heart of PDX.

This Week In Self Help: August 30 + September 1

Those upside-down drinking vessels invite you to a useless list of the radio shows I did this week.

Sunday August 30 was International Bat Night so I played bat songs on The Dickenbock Report on XRAY FM. You can listen to that show here.

September 1 I explored the theme "vessel" on Self Help Radio on KBOO. You can listen to that show here. Or you can listen to that show here.

Also September 1 I played a lot of new releases on Corporate Standardized Programming on KBOO. You can listen to that show here (after Self Help Radio). Or you can listen to that show here.

That was pretty painless right? Have a drink from your favorite vessel.

Self Help Radio 090126: Vessel

A radio show with the theme "vessel." Because I wanted to make a show with a theme that started with the letter V. Uh oh. I only have one show with a theme that starts with the letter X!

Nothing more to add - tho I did want to mention all the different vessels I've been in or on. I never got around to that. I mean, is a train a vessel? Apparently not. Vessels - I should've mentioned this - apparently run only on water. I thought at least you could refer to a car as a vessel. I have a troll I need to apologize to now.

Listen to the show either on the KBOO web page or on the Self Help Radio web page. Most everything that happened on the show is below. I mean, if a submarine can be an undersea vessel, why can't a car be an overground vessel? Please don't make me do another vessel show!

Self Help Radio Vessel Show

"Vessels" Philip Glass _Koyaanisqatsi (Life Out Of Balance) (Original Soundtrack Album From The Motion Picture)_

introduction & definitions - featuring the Definition-O-Tron 3000

"Empty Vessels" Blurt _Blurt_

"Vessels" The Moonlandingz _Interplanetary Class Classics_

"The Unworthy Vessel" William S Burroughs _The Best Of William Burroughs From Giorno Poetry Systems_

"Vessel" Spice Boys _Glade_

"The Vessel" Salem 66 _A Ripping Spin_

interview with writer Edwin Kent

"Empty Vessels" Po! _Not Marked On The Ordnance Map_

"Vessel" Frankie Cosmos _Vessel_

"Vessel In Vain" Smog _Supper_

"Vessel Of Light" Rickie Lee Jones _Ghostyhead_

"Vessel Of Love" Hollie Cook _Vessel Of Love_

interview with trolls Bartholomew & Itchy

"Empty Vessel" Dirty Projectors _5 EPs_

"Vessel" Finger _Finger_

"Vessels" Aperture _Threads_

"Tiny Vessels" Death Cab For Cutie _Transatlanticism_

"Vessels" White Hinterland _Phylactery Factory_

"can I be a vessel?"

"Vessel" Skullcrusher _And Your Song Is Like A Circle_

"Whaling Vessel" Bombadil _Metrics Of Affection_

"Sun 2 (Vessel)" Speculum Bunny _Seven Suns_

"Faulty Vessels" Gouwzee _Gouwzee_

"Vessel" Autobahn _The Moral Crossing_

conclusion & goodbye

"If Truth Were A Vessel" The Moms _Doing Asbestos We Can_

"Empty Vessels (ft. Roots Manuva)" The Maccabees _Wall Of Arms_

"Into The Vessel" Molly Sullivan _Winter '13_

Whither Vessel?

Don't make me swear but I think I took that picture in Australia riding the ferry across the harbor from the zoo back to the main city area. I found the picture last night & now have no idea where I found it. & my computer is not being helpful. Oh yeah! It was! But I think this was on a long ride around the harbor instead. Excuse me, harbour.

Anyway, the show today. Not counting Valentine's Day shows, I was just looking & saw I have only done fourteen shows whose themes started with the letter V. So I thought I should do another one. & I thought of the word vessel. & that's all.

The vessel show. Tonight on KBOO. Midnight to 2am. 90.7fm. kboo dot fm.

Sorry if that wasn't more exciting.

Preface To Vessel: Beached Vessel

(image found here)

Do you wanna know what I just discovered? The website for the National Gallery Of Art - at nga dot gov - is searchable! I guess I haven't really looked around government websites since you-know-who has made everything worse, but I like the idea of looking for images there instead of the wild west of search engine searches - altho I'm not entirely sure about the legality of posting these images here. Maybe it's cool because the art belongs to America? I'll try to find out.

The painting above is entitled Beached Vessel, it's by George Loring Brown, the date is "c.1880." The website tells us it's "watercolor on wove paper." (Good thing it's not woke paper, amirite? Ugh this is the worst time to be alive.)

Wikipedia tells us that "George Loring Brown (February 2, 1814 – June 25, 1889) was an American landscape painter. He was born in Boston & first studied wood engraving under Alonzo Hartwell & worked as an illustrator. He studied painting with Washington Allston, but soon went to Europe, residing principally in Italy for years. Brown spent much of his life abroad, & the motives of his pictures are usually Italian, & there is nothing specifically American about them either in treatment or sentiment."

Ouch! Take that, person who lived in the 19th century & didn't want to hang out in America!

Does this mean there might be more art from the National Gallery on this blog? If I remember, sure! Is this the reason this week's show's theme is "vessel"? No, I'll tell you that tomorrow.

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: International Bat Night

The last weekend in August is when International Bat Night happens. Sunday August 30 on the Dickenbock Report on XRAY is where the Dickenbock Report talks about & plays musical reports about bats in honor of International Bat Night. It's in the late morning/early afternoon so we'll try not to wake the bats.

Tomorrow! 11am to 1pm! On 91.1+107.1fm in town, xray dot fm everywhere. For bat enthusiasts & lay bat fans alike.

This Week In Self Help: August 21 23 + 25

It's true for some reason no one's kicked me off the radio yet. Here's a list of reasons why they might tho:

Friday August 21. The Songcircle on KBOO. I played a bunch of my favorite songs from 1986 because it's forty years ago. You can listen to that show here.

Sunday August 23. The Dickenbock Report on XRAY. It was National Ride The Wind Day so I played songs & talked about flight. You can listen to that show here.

Tuesday August 25. Self Help Radio on KBOO. The 81st installment of the Indiepop A To Z series. You can listen to that show here. Or you can listen to that show here.

Tuesday August 25. Corporate Standardized Programming on KBOO. Music by artists we lost in late March of this year. You can listen to that show here (after Self Help Radio). Or you can listen to that show here.

Can't you see? Something must be done!

Self Help Radio 082526: Indiepop A To Z # 81

A day late, here is this week's Self Help Radio, a continuation of the Indiepop A To Z series, still in the letter S where I'll be for some time to come, managing to get from Sno - Sol.

You can marvel at the alphabetization in the list below. It was just me & the music but also because it's a KBOO Membership Drive, some pledge pitching as well. Hopefully not a bother. Maybe it might encourage you to help out?

You can listen to the show at the KBOO website & at the Self Help Radio website.

Please enjoy. I'll return to the series in four months!

Self Help Radio Indiepop A To Z # 81

"Parris Song" Sno*Boy _Something Cool_

"Misery" Snog 6 _Start All Over Again_

"Hopping Puddles" The Snogs _Can't Be Bothered_ 

"Providence" Snoozer _Winter Stops All Sound EP_

"When I Say Go" The Snorkels _When I Say Go_

"April Showers" The Snow Fairies _Feel You Up_

"Old Tin Roof" Snow Machine _Snow Machine_

"Water Boatman" Snowball _Winter's Mist_

"The North Wind Doth Blow" Snowbird _Sing Me To Sleep - Indie Lullabies_

"Impossible Dream" Snowbirds _Les Poissons Solubles / Snowbirds Split Single_

"Easy Girl" Snowblind _The Falls_

"Summerness" Snowdrops _Matinée 50_

"Summer Song" Snuggletooth _Slot Machine EP_

"Disappointed" Soap _Still Muddling Along?_

"Head In The Hay" Socialist Leisure Party _Tactical Pop! For Coffee Cadets_

"I Sit & Wait For What?" Soda Fountain Rag _Extra Life_

"Grains Of Sand" Soda Stream _Grapefruit EP_

"Deadstopper" Sodajerk _My Sweet Dream - A Compilation_

"Autumn Sung" Sodastream _Practical Footwear_

"Kingdom Of Love" The Soft Boys _Underwater Moonlight_

"Falling Star" The Soft City _The Soft City_

"Never Again" Soft Lads _Between Two Waves - The Second Wave_

"Just Like The Sky" Soft Pillow Kisses _Summer Escape_

"Understand" Soft Science _Sand_

"Sleep Away Your Troubles" The Softies _Holiday In Rhode Island_

"Stuck On The Shell" The Sohfas _Mind The Gap (The Compilation-Tape)_

"I'll Kill Her" Soko _Not Sokute_

"My Brightest Star" Solace _My Brightest Star_

Whither Indiepop A To Z # 81?

Every four months I return to this series, called Indiepop A To Z, that I started over twenty years ago. I'm in the letter S, which (I just checked) I started in December 2023. It means I've been exploring indiepop bands in the letter S for almost three years! No wonder I doubt I'll ever finish this series!

Tonight I'll get to the end of the Sn bands & start the So bands. It's always a joy for me to do this series because the I just love this kind of music. I wish I didn't feel like I was excluding too much because it makes the gathering a little stressful. But once the show is done it feels worth it.

Is it worth it? You decide. Self Help Radio is on tonight midnight to 2am on 90.7fm here in Portland, kboo dot fm everywhere.

(We'll also in a membership drive. If you can help, click here & thank you!)

Preface To Indiepop A To Z # 81: Off-Topic Observation

No idea where that screen capture is from. It has nothing to do with what I am about to say. I just saved it because it says "Gary chuckling."

Also nothing I have to say has anything to do with this week's show. Or maybe a little. It's just something I have been noticing, not just recently, but all the work I had to do this weekend reminded me more forcefully than simple reminiscing.

Here's the observation: the older I get, the longer it takes me to do things.

& yes, I know, even if someone has told me forty years ago that would happen, I probably would not have paid much attention. When I was eighteen, people my age looked & acted much older. I can't say if I look my age, but I certainly don't feel my age. My mother, though, who was almost exactly forty years older than me, told me when I was a senior in high school that had never felt worse than how she felt at that time.

Maybe she was trying to warn me? I didn't matter, I wasn't paying much attention.

But it's true. Things that used to take me, say, ten minutes to do, it's now fifteen to twenty minutes. Maybe not driving places - I'm pretty speedy - but let's say, oh, I don't know, what can I think, how about writing in a dumb blog? I bet I've been working on this - yes - twenty minutes now.

TWENTY MINUTES? Was I dozing between sentences? Nope. It just takes me that long. One day I won't be able to finish a radio show in the time I have set aside for me, & maybe I've already set aside more time & didn't even notice it.

Also maybe there's something to do about it but at this point I don't think so. I consume as much caffeine as I can handle, & Uhink meth & cocaine would just make me tired. With lots of things involving age, it's best to accept that it's just something you have to get used to.

Speaking of getting tired, why should writing this have tired me out. Oh jeez I'm so old.

Coming Up Tomorrow On The Dickenbock Report: National Ride The Wind Day

Actually, that's not a good photo for this blog entry, which is about National Ride The Wind Day, which is about human-powered flight, not birds, who fly with ease. We're stuck with the photo? All right.

August 23 is National Ride The Wind Day. "Ride the wind" is a kind of euphemism for "flight." So the Dickenbock Report will report on flight - including some kinds of flight that veer a little outside the definition for the day. But not as far as birds!

The show airs Sunday from 11am to 1pm on XRAY - 91.1+107.1fm in Portland, xray dot fm everywhere. We'll see you in the air & on the air.

This Week In Self Help August 16 18 + 20

Once again, not a picture of the bayou, but of the lake at Reed College, which is called Reed Lake. My computer thinks it's a bayou when I search for a bayou but it's not a bayou. Not at all.

Anyway this is the nonsense I got up to this week (not counting today, which I'll talk about next week).

Sunday August 16. The Dickenbock Report on XRAY. National Roller Coaster Day. Have a listen.

Tuesday August 18. Self Help Radio on KBOO. A show with the theme "bayou." Have a listen here. Or have a listen here.

Tuesday August 18. Corporate Standardized Programming on KBOO. Lotsa new releases. Have a listen here (after Self Help Radio). Or have a listen here.

Thursday August 20. Welcome To Your Good Day on XRAY. I sub a show trying to raise money for XRAY's move by playing lots of songs about moving. Have a listen.

One day I'll go to the bayou & take lots of pictures! But way too late for my bayou show.