Friends, in less than two hours there will be a show on the radio so magnificient, so incredible, so embarrassingly good that you'll believe that radio is a transformative medium. You'll believe radio can change lives, as your life will be changed. You will never be able to think or feel in the same way again.
Unfortunately, I don't know which station that show's on. I'll place good odds it's not on in Austin - I mean, have you heard the radio in this town? Embarassing, that's what it is. Anyway, if you can find it, give me a call. But if you can't, & you've got nothing better to do, tune in to Self Help Radio today at 4:30pm either on your FM dial at 91.7 fm or on your computer dial (what?) over at koop.org. The show today's all about Michigan. It'll be for more than just Yoopers & Trolls.
Tune in! I'll be making tea!
Here's a funny "Song Of The Day" by the Smothers Brothers, from their record Think Ethic. It's called I Never Will Marry - click on it to listen. It's here till April 5, 2007.
Do tune in today!
Friday, March 23, 2007
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Your Letters Are Stinky! (But I Answer Them Anyway)
LB asks me:
Gary, How was SXSW? Did you see good bands?
Thank you for asking, LB. & no, I still don't want to be your myspace friend. Your page is creepy.
I went to the KOOP Indiepop Hootenanny so I could see Tullycraft for free, then I went to see Mark Burgess since he's a fucking legend, but other than that, nah, I didn't do much. I did hang out some at KOOP, where we were playing lots of live bands in the studio, but didn't help or anything. That's all. Mainly my girlfriend & I planned to completely redecorate our backyard. Buffalo grass, anyone?
Oh god! What a boring blog post this is! Let's start again.
During South By South Wets I hung out with [super famous dude] who scored drugs from [someone who works for the Onion], & we were totally [tripping/zoning/rolling/vomiting] until we managed to sneak backstage at [some place that it's hard to sneak into] & caught [the band you wanted to see but couldn't because douchebags from the Chronicle filled the place up] & they were [disappointing/awesome/as fucked up as I was/dead]! Then someone put [whatever I haven't yet taken] into my drink, & I found myself with [Andy Dick] in a hottub in the back of [dull Hollywood type who's moved to Austin in the past few years]'s limo doing [things I'd later regret]. How I got home I'll never know. & dude, that was just WEDNESDAY!
Thursday, Friday & Saturday I spent in intensive care.
Write me an email! I'll answer it here!
Here's a sad little "Song Of The Day" by so-called "anti-folk" musician Jeffrey Lewis from his first record, The Last Time I Did Acid I Went Insane & Other Favorites. It's a sad little ditty about Leonard Cohen, meeting people on the street & trying desperately to stay upbeat in spite of everything. It's called The Chelsea Hotel Oral Sex Song & you can click to hear it. I'll leave it here for two weeks - until April 5 - & then it'll go away.
Tomorrow at 4:30 pm Austin time - yowsa! A show about Michigan!
Gary, How was SXSW? Did you see good bands?
Thank you for asking, LB. & no, I still don't want to be your myspace friend. Your page is creepy.
I went to the KOOP Indiepop Hootenanny so I could see Tullycraft for free, then I went to see Mark Burgess since he's a fucking legend, but other than that, nah, I didn't do much. I did hang out some at KOOP, where we were playing lots of live bands in the studio, but didn't help or anything. That's all. Mainly my girlfriend & I planned to completely redecorate our backyard. Buffalo grass, anyone?
Oh god! What a boring blog post this is! Let's start again.
During South By South Wets I hung out with [super famous dude] who scored drugs from [someone who works for the Onion], & we were totally [tripping/zoning/rolling/vomiting] until we managed to sneak backstage at [some place that it's hard to sneak into] & caught [the band you wanted to see but couldn't because douchebags from the Chronicle filled the place up] & they were [disappointing/awesome/as fucked up as I was/dead]! Then someone put [whatever I haven't yet taken] into my drink, & I found myself with [Andy Dick] in a hottub in the back of [dull Hollywood type who's moved to Austin in the past few years]'s limo doing [things I'd later regret]. How I got home I'll never know. & dude, that was just WEDNESDAY!
Thursday, Friday & Saturday I spent in intensive care.
Write me an email! I'll answer it here!
Here's a sad little "Song Of The Day" by so-called "anti-folk" musician Jeffrey Lewis from his first record, The Last Time I Did Acid I Went Insane & Other Favorites. It's a sad little ditty about Leonard Cohen, meeting people on the street & trying desperately to stay upbeat in spite of everything. It's called The Chelsea Hotel Oral Sex Song & you can click to hear it. I'll leave it here for two weeks - until April 5 - & then it'll go away.
Tomorrow at 4:30 pm Austin time - yowsa! A show about Michigan!
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Whither Michigan?
I mentioned before I've never been to Michigan. I'll mention it again. I'll mention again that I've never been to Michigan. There. I mentioned it again. I'll mention it unknowingly at some point during the next few minutes as well. There's hardly any self-consciousness between me & my travels. Either I've been some place or I haven't. I've never been to the moon, for example, but also I've never been an astronaut. Nor is my name "Buzz." It's Gary. In case you haven't noticed.
Sometime last February, in-between Bush Administration Fuck-Ups, I was sitting at the bus stop, minding my own business, wondering, as I sometimes do, how I got there (it was four in the morning) & who had signed my nipples. Since it was dark, & I was looking down at my nipples, I couldn't read the text (it was upside down), but later I discovered that a professional Ray Davies impersonator signed my nipples at a karaoke bar when I was pretending to be a police detective & would simply walk up to people with a megaphone, flash what looked like a badge but what was really my iPod, & scream "AMBER ALERT!" Strangely enough, the Ray Davies impersonator decided to sign my nipples "Paul Harvey." It was a good night, & I thank whoever it was who told me that cough syrup & permanent markers were a foot in the door of madness. I lost my shoe in that door that night.
Anyway, while I was sitting at the bus stop, trying to read my nipples, I became aware of a man sleeping on the ground behind the bench. He was muttering something to himself in his sleep. Naturally, him being asleep, I didn't expect him to be saying anything that would make sense, & I was right. He would shudder occasionally & his words were at turns inaudible & almost yelled out. I remember a few snatches of his dream babble:
He's got me!... I never loved Annie... What's love got to do, got to do with it?... Five'll get you ten he won't be able to find his underwear tomorrow... Buy refuse, sell trash... What's love but a second-hand emotion?... Indeed, this particular theorum stumped even the Pythogorians!... There's no way to find suspicious files in your mailboxes... Seriously - who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?... Annie! Annie!
I listened to his soliloquy for some time until I realized that the bus doesn't come at 4am. Also, my nipples (I discovered) are allergic to magic markers, so I began to experience some uncomfortable burning sensations in my man-breasts. So I began to raise myself & find my way home, when the sleeping man grabbed my leg. I couldn't make out his face, but he was bellowing at me something I couldn't understand. So I said, "Let me go!" He didn't let me go. I screamed, "I'll call the cops!' Nothing. I tried to get free while pleading to the night, "Please dear lord don't let me die at the hands of a man who dreams in Tina Turner songs!" He seemed to clutch me tighter. A cloud went behind the moon. A streetlight went out & a car down the street burst into flames (although it could have been a lingering cough syrup hallucination). I fell to the ground, skinning my knees & my palms, & I said, "No, no, no! I've never even been to Michigan!"
I didn't know that "Michigan" was the safe word of Annie, the strange old man's S&M partner. He let me go & offered to buy me breakfast. We ate that morning by the dumpsters outside IHOP & became fast friends. I dedicate this week's show - & the inspiration for it - to him.
By the way, that man was none other than GERALD MCRANEY. As if you didn't know.
Quick! A "Song Of The Day"! By Rodd Keith! From the collection Ecstasy To Frenzy! The song my girlfriend wants to dance to at our wedding: Little Rug Bug! Click to listen! Listen until April 4, 2007! Find out more about Song-Poems!
Sometime last February, in-between Bush Administration Fuck-Ups, I was sitting at the bus stop, minding my own business, wondering, as I sometimes do, how I got there (it was four in the morning) & who had signed my nipples. Since it was dark, & I was looking down at my nipples, I couldn't read the text (it was upside down), but later I discovered that a professional Ray Davies impersonator signed my nipples at a karaoke bar when I was pretending to be a police detective & would simply walk up to people with a megaphone, flash what looked like a badge but what was really my iPod, & scream "AMBER ALERT!" Strangely enough, the Ray Davies impersonator decided to sign my nipples "Paul Harvey." It was a good night, & I thank whoever it was who told me that cough syrup & permanent markers were a foot in the door of madness. I lost my shoe in that door that night.
Anyway, while I was sitting at the bus stop, trying to read my nipples, I became aware of a man sleeping on the ground behind the bench. He was muttering something to himself in his sleep. Naturally, him being asleep, I didn't expect him to be saying anything that would make sense, & I was right. He would shudder occasionally & his words were at turns inaudible & almost yelled out. I remember a few snatches of his dream babble:
He's got me!... I never loved Annie... What's love got to do, got to do with it?... Five'll get you ten he won't be able to find his underwear tomorrow... Buy refuse, sell trash... What's love but a second-hand emotion?... Indeed, this particular theorum stumped even the Pythogorians!... There's no way to find suspicious files in your mailboxes... Seriously - who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?... Annie! Annie!
I listened to his soliloquy for some time until I realized that the bus doesn't come at 4am. Also, my nipples (I discovered) are allergic to magic markers, so I began to experience some uncomfortable burning sensations in my man-breasts. So I began to raise myself & find my way home, when the sleeping man grabbed my leg. I couldn't make out his face, but he was bellowing at me something I couldn't understand. So I said, "Let me go!" He didn't let me go. I screamed, "I'll call the cops!' Nothing. I tried to get free while pleading to the night, "Please dear lord don't let me die at the hands of a man who dreams in Tina Turner songs!" He seemed to clutch me tighter. A cloud went behind the moon. A streetlight went out & a car down the street burst into flames (although it could have been a lingering cough syrup hallucination). I fell to the ground, skinning my knees & my palms, & I said, "No, no, no! I've never even been to Michigan!"
I didn't know that "Michigan" was the safe word of Annie, the strange old man's S&M partner. He let me go & offered to buy me breakfast. We ate that morning by the dumpsters outside IHOP & became fast friends. I dedicate this week's show - & the inspiration for it - to him.
By the way, that man was none other than GERALD MCRANEY. As if you didn't know.
Quick! A "Song Of The Day"! By Rodd Keith! From the collection Ecstasy To Frenzy! The song my girlfriend wants to dance to at our wedding: Little Rug Bug! Click to listen! Listen until April 4, 2007! Find out more about Song-Poems!
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Preface To Michigan: What's So Great About Your Lakes?
I've never been to Michigan. Never even drove through. The closest I've been is Chicago. So why do a show about Michigan? Oh, wait. I'll answer that tomorrow.
Here's some fun facts about Michigan:
* It's the one state in the United States that didn't finish high school, but skipped a grade in elementary school.
* Michigan's name comes from a foreign word meaning something appropriate to the state.
* 1 in 4 people in Michigan have appeared (whether they like it or not) in a Michael Moore film.
* Super stuntman Elvis Knelvis once tried to jump Michigan in a motor boat. He sped west from Lake Huron into Saginaw Bay & tore up a three-mile-long ramp southwesterly, hoping to land in Lake Michigan outside Holland. Instead, his boat capsized & he was eaten by an electric eel.
* The Michigan-Ohio border is heavily fortified, but no one really knows why. Some blame it on Motown.
* No American president has ever come from Michigan. Gerald Ford claimed to be from Michigan, but, as his untimely death revealed earlier this year, he was an imaginary president.
* People from Michigan are called Michiganians, Michiganders, Michigeese, Michiganites, Michigolliwogs, or Jeff.
* Porcupine Mountains State Park is a totally cool place to hook up with your squeeze & to score some killer local weed. Go to the Park Ranger Station & ask for Canada Joe. If possible, bring a trinket. He collects commemorative spoons. He'll totally set you up.
* Michigan has more lighthouses that any other state, except perhaps Utah. Just think about it, it makes sense.
* There is a place called Podunk, Michigan. My brother said I was making it up but I wasn't. I also wasn't making up Timbuktu so stop being a baby & come look at this map. Mom!
Did you want to hear a "Song Of The Day"? Here's one that has almost nothing to do with Michigan, except that it's about a popular pasttime in Dearborn. It's from a compilation called Dirtnap Across The Northwest, which is a rock/indie rock/punk/garage kind of comp. "Dirtnap" is an anagram of "Dr. Paint." I just noticed that. Anyway, the song is by the Exploding Hearts & it's called Sniffin' Glue. Click to sniff. Do it before April 3, 2007. Then it goes away.
Tomorrow: why sniffing glue is an epidemic in Michigan, & how that led an intrepid deejay to focus on it on a special Self Help Radio profile!
Here's some fun facts about Michigan:
* It's the one state in the United States that didn't finish high school, but skipped a grade in elementary school.
* Michigan's name comes from a foreign word meaning something appropriate to the state.
* 1 in 4 people in Michigan have appeared (whether they like it or not) in a Michael Moore film.
* Super stuntman Elvis Knelvis once tried to jump Michigan in a motor boat. He sped west from Lake Huron into Saginaw Bay & tore up a three-mile-long ramp southwesterly, hoping to land in Lake Michigan outside Holland. Instead, his boat capsized & he was eaten by an electric eel.
* The Michigan-Ohio border is heavily fortified, but no one really knows why. Some blame it on Motown.
* No American president has ever come from Michigan. Gerald Ford claimed to be from Michigan, but, as his untimely death revealed earlier this year, he was an imaginary president.
* People from Michigan are called Michiganians, Michiganders, Michigeese, Michiganites, Michigolliwogs, or Jeff.
* Porcupine Mountains State Park is a totally cool place to hook up with your squeeze & to score some killer local weed. Go to the Park Ranger Station & ask for Canada Joe. If possible, bring a trinket. He collects commemorative spoons. He'll totally set you up.
* Michigan has more lighthouses that any other state, except perhaps Utah. Just think about it, it makes sense.
* There is a place called Podunk, Michigan. My brother said I was making it up but I wasn't. I also wasn't making up Timbuktu so stop being a baby & come look at this map. Mom!
Did you want to hear a "Song Of The Day"? Here's one that has almost nothing to do with Michigan, except that it's about a popular pasttime in Dearborn. It's from a compilation called Dirtnap Across The Northwest, which is a rock/indie rock/punk/garage kind of comp. "Dirtnap" is an anagram of "Dr. Paint." I just noticed that. Anyway, the song is by the Exploding Hearts & it's called Sniffin' Glue. Click to sniff. Do it before April 3, 2007. Then it goes away.
Tomorrow: why sniffing glue is an epidemic in Michigan, & how that led an intrepid deejay to focus on it on a special Self Help Radio profile!
Monday, March 19, 2007
Two Times The Monday Wrap-Ups At Four Times The Price
Well, another "Sowf By Sowf Vest" has gone by & what have we learned? That's a rhetorical question. I spent most of the weekend doing yard work.
Since I missed two weeks of wrap-ups, let's go ahead & share two whole weeks of haikus & limericks.
First: my "SXSW" show. Haiku winners, from fourth to first place:
FOURTH PLACE: Joe
Here is the lost man
He can’t find the Austin bar
He’s playing tonight
THIRD PLACE: Gail
You feel unwanted?
Remember: you did not get
An invitation.
SECOND PLACE: Dave
Watch the grand monkey
He’s overstimulated
There’s too much to do!
FIRST PLACE: Stacy
A heart left behind
No lights capture drunken sleep
Bed of my own filth
& a limerick:
It’s said that the best of the best
Come here during South By Southwest
But once you’ve attended
& cash you have spended
You’ll see they’re as bad as the rest.
Yippee!
Last week was a tribute to Molly Ivins. Here are the winning haikus:
FOURTH PLACE: Susan
Never met, now gone
Strange an emptiness appears
Missing someone's words
THIRD PLACE: John
Rules are gonna change
If there's no beer in heaven
She'll brew the first batch
SECOND PLACE: Marcos
Like the best ideas
Both familiar & new, she
Made me laugh & think
FIRST PLACE: Rachel
Molly Molly I
Made me laugh & made me cry
Good Molly goodbye
What? Another limerick? Sure:
If life's all about survivin'
Cheatin', backstabbin', connivin',
How sad that our poor sphere
Has less to fight with here
Losing dear old Molly Ivins.
& lo & behold: the "Song Of The Day" returns. I was feeling electronical today & was listening to The Black Dog - specifically the record Silenced. I thought you might like to hear some too. This is the first track, called Trojan Horus (Part 1) & you can click on it to hear it. It'll be up for two weeks, until April 2 2007.
This week: I learned how to speak Michiganese to explain to you why my show this week is about Michigan!
Since I missed two weeks of wrap-ups, let's go ahead & share two whole weeks of haikus & limericks.
First: my "SXSW" show. Haiku winners, from fourth to first place:
FOURTH PLACE: Joe
Here is the lost man
He can’t find the Austin bar
He’s playing tonight
THIRD PLACE: Gail
You feel unwanted?
Remember: you did not get
An invitation.
SECOND PLACE: Dave
Watch the grand monkey
He’s overstimulated
There’s too much to do!
FIRST PLACE: Stacy
A heart left behind
No lights capture drunken sleep
Bed of my own filth
& a limerick:
It’s said that the best of the best
Come here during South By Southwest
But once you’ve attended
& cash you have spended
You’ll see they’re as bad as the rest.
Yippee!
Last week was a tribute to Molly Ivins. Here are the winning haikus:
FOURTH PLACE: Susan
Never met, now gone
Strange an emptiness appears
Missing someone's words
THIRD PLACE: John
Rules are gonna change
If there's no beer in heaven
She'll brew the first batch
SECOND PLACE: Marcos
Like the best ideas
Both familiar & new, she
Made me laugh & think
FIRST PLACE: Rachel
Molly Molly I
Made me laugh & made me cry
Good Molly goodbye
What? Another limerick? Sure:
If life's all about survivin'
Cheatin', backstabbin', connivin',
How sad that our poor sphere
Has less to fight with here
Losing dear old Molly Ivins.
& lo & behold: the "Song Of The Day" returns. I was feeling electronical today & was listening to The Black Dog - specifically the record Silenced. I thought you might like to hear some too. This is the first track, called Trojan Horus (Part 1) & you can click on it to hear it. It'll be up for two weeks, until April 2 2007.
This week: I learned how to speak Michiganese to explain to you why my show this week is about Michigan!
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
What The Hell Happened To The Self Help Radio Blog?
Oh, I'm sorry. I got sick. This week is "South By West South" in Austin & I usually take the week off (but not because I got sick) (that happened this time) (I hope it doesn't become a yearly thing). It's been raining a lot, as well. Not that that keeps me from blogging, since I rarely blog outdoors, but it seemed something I could add for people who like local color.
This blog thing will resume its normal course next Monday. Until then, here are three important things to know:
1) If you want to hear my radio show from last week, where I played songs by bands I like who coincidentally happen to be coming to town for the "music festival" which happens around this time every year in Austin (although, contrary to popular belief, it did not happen in the years 1862-1865, because of the Civil War), you can do that now over at the Self Help Radio home page. Think of it as a way to listen to my radio show even when it's not Friday.
2) Speaking of Friday, this Friday I am paying tribute to a great Texan named Molly Ivins. I never met her, although she spent a lot of time in Austin, but I've been reading her since I was aware there was a funny, brash, smart, dissenting voice out there that didn't sound like anyone else. My show will still be mostly music, but if you're lucky, I may cry.
3) There'll be no "Songs Of The Days" this week. Sorry. Find other blogs that do that. There are lots.
Have fun this week, whether you're in Austin or not. I'll be back next Monday.
This blog thing will resume its normal course next Monday. Until then, here are three important things to know:
1) If you want to hear my radio show from last week, where I played songs by bands I like who coincidentally happen to be coming to town for the "music festival" which happens around this time every year in Austin (although, contrary to popular belief, it did not happen in the years 1862-1865, because of the Civil War), you can do that now over at the Self Help Radio home page. Think of it as a way to listen to my radio show even when it's not Friday.
2) Speaking of Friday, this Friday I am paying tribute to a great Texan named Molly Ivins. I never met her, although she spent a lot of time in Austin, but I've been reading her since I was aware there was a funny, brash, smart, dissenting voice out there that didn't sound like anyone else. My show will still be mostly music, but if you're lucky, I may cry.
3) There'll be no "Songs Of The Days" this week. Sorry. Find other blogs that do that. There are lots.
Have fun this week, whether you're in Austin or not. I'll be back next Monday.
Friday, March 09, 2007
A Friday Gambol
Did you know that there's a radio show show on in Austin on Fridays called (believe it or not) Self Help Radio & it's hosted by a man who's not only not a zombie nor a robot, but who also is the main chronicler of the war on sailing? It's true. It's on Fridays at 4:30pm. You can listen online if you are not from these parts (remember, you may have to translate from Texas time) live at koop.org. You are welcome to come. But the fruit cups are for the celebrity guests.
Today's show will be some sounds from bands that are coming to Austin next week for a little-known musical festival called "Over By Over-Rated." If you happen to be coming to town, please come visit KOOP. If you happen to be coming to town & you're going to visit KOOP, & it's a Friday afternoon, come visit me. I'll put you on the air & we'll cry about our lost youth.
Before I disappear for the week, here's a "Song Of The Day". It sounds a lot like the sort of music you'd hear on a show I really like on KOOP called Cinemaphonics. It's by the Herbaliser from their record called Take London. (Take it where?) It's called Song For Mary & once you click on it, you can add, "& it goes like this..." It will stay there till oh let's say March 23, 2007.
I'll be seeing you on the radio today! I mean. What?
Today's show will be some sounds from bands that are coming to Austin next week for a little-known musical festival called "Over By Over-Rated." If you happen to be coming to town, please come visit KOOP. If you happen to be coming to town & you're going to visit KOOP, & it's a Friday afternoon, come visit me. I'll put you on the air & we'll cry about our lost youth.
Before I disappear for the week, here's a "Song Of The Day". It sounds a lot like the sort of music you'd hear on a show I really like on KOOP called Cinemaphonics. It's by the Herbaliser from their record called Take London. (Take it where?) It's called Song For Mary & once you click on it, you can add, "& it goes like this..." It will stay there till oh let's say March 23, 2007.
I'll be seeing you on the radio today! I mean. What?
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Jesus Answered Letters On Thursdays
It's true, look at II Carpathians 3:14 to 5:13 (inclusive).
Today's letter doesn't really make a lot of sense unless you're really drunk on cough syrup & then try to revive yourself by doing twelve espresso shots in a row. So do that, then read this:
GARY!
yoou wanted me to write ---- i saw ON your blog --! tell me all about yourself --!-- i dont live in AUSTIN so your station is a ??mystery??-!--- do you PLAY music or is your shoow FOR peoople?-?---!-- is THIS the sort of questioon you like US to ask you?-----becayse I can't think oof ANYTHING MORE!---
--from C in COLORADO---
The writer's name is not a single letter. I just abbreviated it because I didn't know how many people in Colorado had a name that started with the letter C. That way you can only guess who it is. You'll never be sure.
Unless you know someone who uses that many dashes in their email. That's intriguing. I must start doing that. I'll probably start doing that. I swipe weird written habits sometimes without thinking about it. Just because it looks neat. Although I'll need to study this writer's ways a little more first. I'd hate to do it wrong.
To respond to the email:
I can't tell you all about myself in this short space, but I can recommend you try to find my OTHER blog (& no, not the one on my embarrassing myspace page), which is much more confessional & contains my unfinished philosophical treatise, I'm Really Sorry, Can I Try Again?. (Now that I think about it, the title of that is ironical. Who knew?) I keep that blog a secret, primarily because of the popularity of a blog I am about to start, one that chronicles the war on sailing. That blog, for better or worse, will make me a household name.
My show is a musical show, but it's also for people. I regularly lament the fact that a lot of radio shows these days are not for people. The number of radio shows for zombies & robots has increased exponentially, & indeed, my own radio station has at least two shows for zombies. (Robots occasionally stop by, especially when they hear the word "programmer," but so far only a couple of KOOP shows have courted robot listeners. This is because robots have a lot of money. Zombies hardly ever have any money, & when they do, they eat it.)
& by the way - just because zombies used to be people doesn't mean they are now. So they can enjoy their "morning zoo crew" all they want, but no people listen to that - & if they do, it'll turn them into zombies.
Finally, those questions are the sorts of questions I like to be asked, yes. Luckily for you, I am capable of answering those sorts of questions with completely different responses every time they are asked. So please, write again. At some point, one of my answers will satisfy you.
& now, a "Song Of The Day". I was listening (as I do) to T Rex, specifically this probably redundant collection I got called T Rex Rocks! & figured I'd share. This appears to be the only "alternate version" on the collection, so maybe it's new to you. It's Rock On, & you can listen to it by clicking the song's name. You may continue rocking until March 22, when I will remove the mp3. Whether you continue to rock after that is up to you.
Tomorrow's show is all about bands I like who are coming to town for an obscure music festival we have every March. Tune in tomorrow at 4:30 pm!
Today's letter doesn't really make a lot of sense unless you're really drunk on cough syrup & then try to revive yourself by doing twelve espresso shots in a row. So do that, then read this:
GARY!
yoou wanted me to write ---- i saw ON your blog --! tell me all about yourself --!-- i dont live in AUSTIN so your station is a ??mystery??-!--- do you PLAY music or is your shoow FOR peoople?-?---!-- is THIS the sort of questioon you like US to ask you?-----becayse I can't think oof ANYTHING MORE!---
--from C in COLORADO---
The writer's name is not a single letter. I just abbreviated it because I didn't know how many people in Colorado had a name that started with the letter C. That way you can only guess who it is. You'll never be sure.
Unless you know someone who uses that many dashes in their email. That's intriguing. I must start doing that. I'll probably start doing that. I swipe weird written habits sometimes without thinking about it. Just because it looks neat. Although I'll need to study this writer's ways a little more first. I'd hate to do it wrong.
To respond to the email:
I can't tell you all about myself in this short space, but I can recommend you try to find my OTHER blog (& no, not the one on my embarrassing myspace page), which is much more confessional & contains my unfinished philosophical treatise, I'm Really Sorry, Can I Try Again?. (Now that I think about it, the title of that is ironical. Who knew?) I keep that blog a secret, primarily because of the popularity of a blog I am about to start, one that chronicles the war on sailing. That blog, for better or worse, will make me a household name.
My show is a musical show, but it's also for people. I regularly lament the fact that a lot of radio shows these days are not for people. The number of radio shows for zombies & robots has increased exponentially, & indeed, my own radio station has at least two shows for zombies. (Robots occasionally stop by, especially when they hear the word "programmer," but so far only a couple of KOOP shows have courted robot listeners. This is because robots have a lot of money. Zombies hardly ever have any money, & when they do, they eat it.)
& by the way - just because zombies used to be people doesn't mean they are now. So they can enjoy their "morning zoo crew" all they want, but no people listen to that - & if they do, it'll turn them into zombies.
Finally, those questions are the sorts of questions I like to be asked, yes. Luckily for you, I am capable of answering those sorts of questions with completely different responses every time they are asked. So please, write again. At some point, one of my answers will satisfy you.
& now, a "Song Of The Day". I was listening (as I do) to T Rex, specifically this probably redundant collection I got called T Rex Rocks! & figured I'd share. This appears to be the only "alternate version" on the collection, so maybe it's new to you. It's Rock On, & you can listen to it by clicking the song's name. You may continue rocking until March 22, when I will remove the mp3. Whether you continue to rock after that is up to you.
Tomorrow's show is all about bands I like who are coming to town for an obscure music festival we have every March. Tune in tomorrow at 4:30 pm!
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Whither SXSW 2007?
Welcome to the 100th post of my Self Help Radio blog! It's such a special occasion I've made this entire entry out of cheese.
This week's show is my recommendations for bands that are playing "South By Southwest." I am playing bands I like. If you choose to go to see them, fine. Just don't mention me. Bands don't like that I like them. I'm not "cool" enough for them. My "ego" is not "strong" enough to take their "abuse." So let's let the fact that I like them & they'll be in town just be our little secret.
In fact, I won't really be involved in the music side of "South By Southwest" at all. I'll instead be involved in the custodial side. You guessed it - I was able to pay the outrageous ten dollar fee to get an official "South By Southwest" dustpan & broom. It's sad, they strap them to your wrist & you can't take them off until after the festival. I'm so excited by this - every morning around five am I get to go out & clean up after partyers & bands!
"South By Southwest Custodial" is a big step forward for me, & I like the way they sell it. Did you see the bullet points on the brochure? Here are highlights:
* Clean up after the famous & not-very-famous alike!
* Get lots of exercise in a stale-beer-smelling environment!
* Find out secrets of the famous & not-so-famous - like whether they can hold their liquor & what they had for dinner - by hosing vomit off of bar floors!
* All guitar picks, jewelry, money & drugs you find you get to keep! Teeth & limbs must be returned to their owners.
So you & I may not cross paths during the festival, but every time you spill a beer - every time you crush a cigarette under your shoe - every time you take a leak backstage - think of me.
Hey! Here's a "Song Of The Day". It's by DJ Yoda, a turntablist whose work I enjoy & from whose mix tapes I've stolen samples, from his record last year called The Amazing Adventures Of DJ Yoda, which was good but not great. Here's a track, featuring the Jungle Brothers. It's called Playin' Around & you should click on it & celebrate this blog's 100th post. It'll remain here till March 21, 2007, at which point I'll have finished this blog's 200th post. (Wait. What?)
Hooray! 100 posts! Someone get me a cheese shredder & we can eat!
This week's show is my recommendations for bands that are playing "South By Southwest." I am playing bands I like. If you choose to go to see them, fine. Just don't mention me. Bands don't like that I like them. I'm not "cool" enough for them. My "ego" is not "strong" enough to take their "abuse." So let's let the fact that I like them & they'll be in town just be our little secret.
In fact, I won't really be involved in the music side of "South By Southwest" at all. I'll instead be involved in the custodial side. You guessed it - I was able to pay the outrageous ten dollar fee to get an official "South By Southwest" dustpan & broom. It's sad, they strap them to your wrist & you can't take them off until after the festival. I'm so excited by this - every morning around five am I get to go out & clean up after partyers & bands!
"South By Southwest Custodial" is a big step forward for me, & I like the way they sell it. Did you see the bullet points on the brochure? Here are highlights:
* Clean up after the famous & not-very-famous alike!
* Get lots of exercise in a stale-beer-smelling environment!
* Find out secrets of the famous & not-so-famous - like whether they can hold their liquor & what they had for dinner - by hosing vomit off of bar floors!
* All guitar picks, jewelry, money & drugs you find you get to keep! Teeth & limbs must be returned to their owners.
So you & I may not cross paths during the festival, but every time you spill a beer - every time you crush a cigarette under your shoe - every time you take a leak backstage - think of me.
Hey! Here's a "Song Of The Day". It's by DJ Yoda, a turntablist whose work I enjoy & from whose mix tapes I've stolen samples, from his record last year called The Amazing Adventures Of DJ Yoda, which was good but not great. Here's a track, featuring the Jungle Brothers. It's called Playin' Around & you should click on it & celebrate this blog's 100th post. It'll remain here till March 21, 2007, at which point I'll have finished this blog's 200th post. (Wait. What?)
Hooray! 100 posts! Someone get me a cheese shredder & we can eat!
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Preface To SXSW2007: Where's The Line Start?
I confess that, though I have lived in Austin for seven hundred years (this September), I have only taken part in "South By South West" a couple of times. I kind of wish I had been a part of it back when it was surely more personal & fun - when a wristband went for a few bucks & when a local band really could count on it as a chance to showcase their skills. Now it feels like a Hollywood awards show - pre-scripted, down to the winners. Of which, heavy sigh, I am not one. Or else I'd doubtless feel differently.
But I play my part. I play songs from bands I like on my show. I make it to day shows (since I can't afford the pound of flesh it takes to get a wristband, &, even if I could, I never pay any attention to the deadlines for purchasing such things) if there's something I want to see, & I feel a little envious when people flaunt their gift bags, their amazing stories ("& then, from out of nowhere, BOB DYLAN stepped onstage & took a shit on the audience!") & the general starfucking that some of my friends like to engage in, for whatever reason (true admiration, ambition, a weird desire to fuck the almost famous).
My envy isn't really, "Gosh I wish I had been there to do that!" It's more, "Gosh I wish I had the energy & desire, the drive, the actual wherewithal, to go out & do shit like that." I'm not made like that - perhaps I never was. & having gone through the snail pantomime that is Customs at Gatwick, I have no desire to wait in any long lines for the time being. Also, I don't smoke anymore - what the hell do you do in a line when you can't smoke?
If you're coming to town for "South By South West," I hope you have fun. Just remember to listen to me on the radio. You don't need a wristband & I always delight. When I am not irritating. Or pouting.
Today's "Song Of The Day" is a sweet shy boy song from The Legendary Jim Ruiz Group that I found on a collection put out by Chickfactor & released a few years ago called All's Fair In Love & Chickfactor. The song is called Ariel, & you can click its name to hear the song. The mp3 will stay right here until March 20, 2007, at which point it'll disappear.
Tomorrow: my one hundredth post here. There will be blood.
But I play my part. I play songs from bands I like on my show. I make it to day shows (since I can't afford the pound of flesh it takes to get a wristband, &, even if I could, I never pay any attention to the deadlines for purchasing such things) if there's something I want to see, & I feel a little envious when people flaunt their gift bags, their amazing stories ("& then, from out of nowhere, BOB DYLAN stepped onstage & took a shit on the audience!") & the general starfucking that some of my friends like to engage in, for whatever reason (true admiration, ambition, a weird desire to fuck the almost famous).
My envy isn't really, "Gosh I wish I had been there to do that!" It's more, "Gosh I wish I had the energy & desire, the drive, the actual wherewithal, to go out & do shit like that." I'm not made like that - perhaps I never was. & having gone through the snail pantomime that is Customs at Gatwick, I have no desire to wait in any long lines for the time being. Also, I don't smoke anymore - what the hell do you do in a line when you can't smoke?
If you're coming to town for "South By South West," I hope you have fun. Just remember to listen to me on the radio. You don't need a wristband & I always delight. When I am not irritating. Or pouting.
Today's "Song Of The Day" is a sweet shy boy song from The Legendary Jim Ruiz Group that I found on a collection put out by Chickfactor & released a few years ago called All's Fair In Love & Chickfactor. The song is called Ariel, & you can click its name to hear the song. The mp3 will stay right here until March 20, 2007, at which point it'll disappear.
Tomorrow: my one hundredth post here. There will be blood.
Monday, March 05, 2007
This Monday Haiku Wrap Up Is Full Of Feist
I hid all last week & no one found me. That makes you "It." Ha!
Here are the winners of the hiding haiku contest - I hope their prizes find them. If you want to write a haiku to be read on the air, just be aware that the theme this week is South By Southwest. Write away! We list the winners from fourth place to first:
FOURTH PLACE: Rick
I was underground
But not hidden, just searching
Looking for my roots
THIRD PLACE: Tanya
Is it called hiding
When I spend time all alone
With guilty pleasures?
SECOND PLACE: Stewart
The sky masked with clouds
Concealing terrible night
Hiding the new moon
FIRST PLACE: Patricia
Watch love stowaway
In the great cruise of your life
Then fall overboard
Did we have a limerick? We did!
In the old Scottish River called Clyde
There beasties are said to be spied
No matter your wishes
‘Tis certain they’re vicious
Your hide it is best that ye hide.
Thanks all! You don't need to hide any more!
Two things:
1) Last Friday's show about hiding has been digitized & can be listened to if you missed. Just go to this page & consume it all up.
2) Today's "Song Of The Day" is from the Smithsonian set American Musical Theater: Shows, Songs & Stars, Vol. 2 & is a song from Lady In The Dark, from the original run & sung by the wonderful Gertrude Lawrence. It's the darkly comic song
Jenny, & clicking on it will show you that you need to learn the song's lesson about making up your mind. I'll leave it here for two weeks, until March 19, 2007.
Tomorrow: there's a music festival coming to Austin. Why do I care?
Here are the winners of the hiding haiku contest - I hope their prizes find them. If you want to write a haiku to be read on the air, just be aware that the theme this week is South By Southwest. Write away! We list the winners from fourth place to first:
FOURTH PLACE: Rick
I was underground
But not hidden, just searching
Looking for my roots
THIRD PLACE: Tanya
Is it called hiding
When I spend time all alone
With guilty pleasures?
SECOND PLACE: Stewart
The sky masked with clouds
Concealing terrible night
Hiding the new moon
FIRST PLACE: Patricia
Watch love stowaway
In the great cruise of your life
Then fall overboard
Did we have a limerick? We did!
In the old Scottish River called Clyde
There beasties are said to be spied
No matter your wishes
‘Tis certain they’re vicious
Your hide it is best that ye hide.
Thanks all! You don't need to hide any more!
Two things:
1) Last Friday's show about hiding has been digitized & can be listened to if you missed. Just go to this page & consume it all up.
2) Today's "Song Of The Day" is from the Smithsonian set American Musical Theater: Shows, Songs & Stars, Vol. 2 & is a song from Lady In The Dark, from the original run & sung by the wonderful Gertrude Lawrence. It's the darkly comic song
Jenny, & clicking on it will show you that you need to learn the song's lesson about making up your mind. I'll leave it here for two weeks, until March 19, 2007.
Tomorrow: there's a music festival coming to Austin. Why do I care?
Friday, March 02, 2007
A Friday Frolic
Nothing much to note... I have to do a show today... It's about hiding...
Are you excited about South By Southwest? I'm doing a show about it next week, & looking over the bands, there aren't many bands I'm too crazy about seeing. I'm be interested in hearing what everyone wants to see. It seems to me that it's not that great a line-up this year.
I came here to contine the "Song Of The Day", where I have shared with you the first five of the my world-famous Indiepop A To Z collection. I'll continue in a couple of months when I have another Indiepop A To Z show. But today is an band called Accrington Stanley (apparently named after an English Football Club) who were featured on the third volume of the essential Sound Of Leamington Spa collections. It's called The New Me & it will turn you into a new man, especially if you're a woman. Click on the song to make it go. It'll be available till the week of March 19, 2007, when I will take it down & make it feel bad for being so downloadable.
Listen at 4:30 today! There are giveaways & stuff. I will personally hide all during the show!
Are you excited about South By Southwest? I'm doing a show about it next week, & looking over the bands, there aren't many bands I'm too crazy about seeing. I'm be interested in hearing what everyone wants to see. It seems to me that it's not that great a line-up this year.
I came here to contine the "Song Of The Day", where I have shared with you the first five of the my world-famous Indiepop A To Z collection. I'll continue in a couple of months when I have another Indiepop A To Z show. But today is an band called Accrington Stanley (apparently named after an English Football Club) who were featured on the third volume of the essential Sound Of Leamington Spa collections. It's called The New Me & it will turn you into a new man, especially if you're a woman. Click on the song to make it go. It'll be available till the week of March 19, 2007, when I will take it down & make it feel bad for being so downloadable.
Listen at 4:30 today! There are giveaways & stuff. I will personally hide all during the show!
Thursday, March 01, 2007
A Letter. An Answer. A Thursday.
Is it really Thursday? I feel like I am deserved at least two more nights' sleep. Oh! But I get paid today. Ah yeah.
This strange email came to me earlier this week:
Hello Mr Gary
I need to know your full name for a project I am working on. Not your middle name if you don't have one but your full name. You don't say your full name on the air like other ko-op dj's do. Thank you.
A project you are working on? Is that what they call identity theft these days? (I have written this person back about this "project," but so far she has not responded. If I find out - & before it ends up on the Sci-Fi Channel - I'll be sure to let you know what it was.)
I guess the worst thing about identity theft would be if a person stealing my identity could do a better job with it than I do.
I also wonder why people call me "Mr. Gary"? I know, it beats being called "dude," but it's strange - people at the station call me that, as does one of my cats. Do I seem like a "Mr Gary"? Not a "Dr Gary"? Or a "Professor Gary"? Hmmph!
I don't suppose it's any secret - the name is all over the KOOP website, since I maintain their mailing lists & am on the Programming Committee - but my name is Gary Dickerson. I guess I don't use my full name on the air since there aren't any other Garys at KOOP. Nor shall I allow there to be.
My middle name died a miserable death just out of high school. It kind of suffocated when I forgot all about it. I've tried to add new middle names, but, alas, no name can apparently live between my first & last names. Sad.
Tune in tomorrow! A show about hiding! You can listen in seclusion! No one will ever know!
Ah, the "Song Of The Day". More Indiepop A To Z. This would be the fourth song as the list goes. It's by the Swedish folk pop band Able from their record Prestigeless Lovesounds. It's called I Was So In Love (& Now I Don't Know Why), & it's by far the poppiest thing I've heard by them. Click on the name to listen. & listen before the week of March 19, 2007 - I'll leave it up till then.
Listen tomorrow or I'll find where you hide!
This strange email came to me earlier this week:
Hello Mr Gary
I need to know your full name for a project I am working on. Not your middle name if you don't have one but your full name. You don't say your full name on the air like other ko-op dj's do. Thank you.
A project you are working on? Is that what they call identity theft these days? (I have written this person back about this "project," but so far she has not responded. If I find out - & before it ends up on the Sci-Fi Channel - I'll be sure to let you know what it was.)
I guess the worst thing about identity theft would be if a person stealing my identity could do a better job with it than I do.
I also wonder why people call me "Mr. Gary"? I know, it beats being called "dude," but it's strange - people at the station call me that, as does one of my cats. Do I seem like a "Mr Gary"? Not a "Dr Gary"? Or a "Professor Gary"? Hmmph!
I don't suppose it's any secret - the name is all over the KOOP website, since I maintain their mailing lists & am on the Programming Committee - but my name is Gary Dickerson. I guess I don't use my full name on the air since there aren't any other Garys at KOOP. Nor shall I allow there to be.
My middle name died a miserable death just out of high school. It kind of suffocated when I forgot all about it. I've tried to add new middle names, but, alas, no name can apparently live between my first & last names. Sad.
Tune in tomorrow! A show about hiding! You can listen in seclusion! No one will ever know!
Ah, the "Song Of The Day". More Indiepop A To Z. This would be the fourth song as the list goes. It's by the Swedish folk pop band Able from their record Prestigeless Lovesounds. It's called I Was So In Love (& Now I Don't Know Why), & it's by far the poppiest thing I've heard by them. Click on the name to listen. & listen before the week of March 19, 2007 - I'll leave it up till then.
Listen tomorrow or I'll find where you hide!
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Whither Hiding?
I remember the day I got a copy (which cost me three dollars in nickels & four hundred saved wrappers of beef jerky - & believe me, my entire bedroom smelled like an abattoir by the time I saved up four hundred of those plastic casings) of the Official Rules Of The Game Of Hide & Seek. My friends had been debating those rules for some time, including what true & eternal rights are granted when one is "it" as well as the boundaries of where it was proper to "hide." Though we didn't have the "internet" then, we certainly knew how to make shit up, so all summer long we argued & cajoled &, even though some of us had by that time discovered masturbation, we spent long afternoons debating the rules of what we truly thought was the ultimate in childhood games.
The Official Rules Of The Game Of Hide & Seek was first published in London in 1745 by a distant ancestor of the actor Martin Sheen. Strangely enough, the writer was also a distant ancestor of George Gobel, but there is no evidence that Martin Sheen & George Gobel are related. Suffice it to say it was very difficult being British in 1745. (1746, however, was apparently a very good year for being British.) The writer's name was Edmund "Fancy Pants" Mathersbykite. A shy & reserved son of a diseased earl, Mathersbykite was tortured by his older siblings with their capriciousness as regards childhood games. Indeed, Mathersbykite's oldest sibling, Clive, is credited with being not only the creator of dodgeball, but also the first person to be hanged for killing someone in a dodgeball game. Young Edmund grew up furious with the way his brothers & his sister seemed incapable of consistency in any single game. If Edmund had not been blessed with obsessive/compulsive disorder (in those days known as "being prissy"), he might not have been able to bring any sort of sense to childhood games.
Two earlier treatises, "The Importance Of Falling Down When You've Been Shot" & "No Take Backs," were written while he was locked in a closet during a game of hide & seek that was a pretext for cruelty. They were self-published when Edmund was seventeen, but were lost when his sister said she wanted to read every copy to tell him what she thought but instead used them for toilet paper for the family manor in Wales. Perhaps because sadism he was subjected to when the game of hide & seek was played, Edmund turned his attention to that subject. He would spend nearly the rest of his life defining the game. Which sounds impressive, except he was killed when he was twenty-two by his younger brother Canute when their kite strings got tangled & Canute angrily wrapped Edmund in the strings. A gust of wind & some nearby cliffs spelled the end for the great rules maker about whom Hoyle once said, "Edmund who?"
As a child, I found The Official Rules Of The Game Of Hide & Seek to be a strangely long book (seventeen hundred pages) & suprisingly free of pictures. It was also filled with footnotes in Greek. In addition, Mathersbykite's tendency to write in iambic pentameter was a little off-putting, especially, as my friend Gus noted, "It don't rhyme." Nonetheless, I began the read the book &, after only a few pages, realized it was utterly worthless. My friends & I, totally bummed about having to return to school after wasting a summer worrying about the rules to a dumb game, beat each other up & went swimming.
I wouldn't have as much fun again until I became an adult & became embroiled in the war on sailing. But that's another story for a different time.
I hope you understand now why the theme of Self Help Radio this week is "hiding."
The "Song Of The Day": more Indiepop A To Z. Song # 3. By the Scottish indiepop group Aberfeldy. From their debut record Young Forever. It's called Vegetarian Restaurant & it's sweet & pretty. I'll remove it on or around March 14, 2007 - but probably later, since it'll be South By Southwest at the time & I probably won't be blogging much.
The Official Rules Of The Game Of Hide & Seek was first published in London in 1745 by a distant ancestor of the actor Martin Sheen. Strangely enough, the writer was also a distant ancestor of George Gobel, but there is no evidence that Martin Sheen & George Gobel are related. Suffice it to say it was very difficult being British in 1745. (1746, however, was apparently a very good year for being British.) The writer's name was Edmund "Fancy Pants" Mathersbykite. A shy & reserved son of a diseased earl, Mathersbykite was tortured by his older siblings with their capriciousness as regards childhood games. Indeed, Mathersbykite's oldest sibling, Clive, is credited with being not only the creator of dodgeball, but also the first person to be hanged for killing someone in a dodgeball game. Young Edmund grew up furious with the way his brothers & his sister seemed incapable of consistency in any single game. If Edmund had not been blessed with obsessive/compulsive disorder (in those days known as "being prissy"), he might not have been able to bring any sort of sense to childhood games.
Two earlier treatises, "The Importance Of Falling Down When You've Been Shot" & "No Take Backs," were written while he was locked in a closet during a game of hide & seek that was a pretext for cruelty. They were self-published when Edmund was seventeen, but were lost when his sister said she wanted to read every copy to tell him what she thought but instead used them for toilet paper for the family manor in Wales. Perhaps because sadism he was subjected to when the game of hide & seek was played, Edmund turned his attention to that subject. He would spend nearly the rest of his life defining the game. Which sounds impressive, except he was killed when he was twenty-two by his younger brother Canute when their kite strings got tangled & Canute angrily wrapped Edmund in the strings. A gust of wind & some nearby cliffs spelled the end for the great rules maker about whom Hoyle once said, "Edmund who?"
As a child, I found The Official Rules Of The Game Of Hide & Seek to be a strangely long book (seventeen hundred pages) & suprisingly free of pictures. It was also filled with footnotes in Greek. In addition, Mathersbykite's tendency to write in iambic pentameter was a little off-putting, especially, as my friend Gus noted, "It don't rhyme." Nonetheless, I began the read the book &, after only a few pages, realized it was utterly worthless. My friends & I, totally bummed about having to return to school after wasting a summer worrying about the rules to a dumb game, beat each other up & went swimming.
I wouldn't have as much fun again until I became an adult & became embroiled in the war on sailing. But that's another story for a different time.
I hope you understand now why the theme of Self Help Radio this week is "hiding."
The "Song Of The Day": more Indiepop A To Z. Song # 3. By the Scottish indiepop group Aberfeldy. From their debut record Young Forever. It's called Vegetarian Restaurant & it's sweet & pretty. I'll remove it on or around March 14, 2007 - but probably later, since it'll be South By Southwest at the time & I probably won't be blogging much.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Preface To Hiding: How Not To Be Seen
Dude! It's my first embedded movie!
If that doesn't work, the video is here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Do6hTwZ6Un8.
I can't say more than the masters.
The "Song Of The Day" continues the very first Indiepop A To Z tracks I played. Number two is/was a song by the California indiepop group Aberdeen, who found their way to the legendary Sarah Records & then reemerged later in the 21st century to make more lovely music. This is an older track taken from the Sarah compilation Battery Point & it's called Fran. Click on the name to hear the song. It'll be here till March 13, 2007.
Tomorrow: why a show about hiding? What have I got to hide?
If that doesn't work, the video is here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Do6hTwZ6Un8.
I can't say more than the masters.
The "Song Of The Day" continues the very first Indiepop A To Z tracks I played. Number two is/was a song by the California indiepop group Aberdeen, who found their way to the legendary Sarah Records & then reemerged later in the 21st century to make more lovely music. This is an older track taken from the Sarah compilation Battery Point & it's called Fran. Click on the name to hear the song. It'll be here till March 13, 2007.
Tomorrow: why a show about hiding? What have I got to hide?
Monday, February 26, 2007
The Monday Haiku Wrap-Up Is Full Of Rue
It's true. I have become a myspace sellout. Please stay away from the Self Help Radio Myspace Page. Although you can hear my rad new radio show intro there.
Here are the winning haikus from last week's free for all. Not a one wrote a haiku about indiepop. That saddens me. This week's theme is "hiding." Don't Hide! Write a haiku instead!
FOURTH PLACE: Anthony
It is almost spring
Like a dark room where you wait
To yell out “surprise!”
THIRD PLACE: Barbara
Gary quit smoking
Just a few days after me
We miss it the same
SECOND PLACE: Andrew
I forget to touch
& leave crumpled in trashcans
Broken sidewalk dreams
FIRST PLACE: Maria
There are nine levels
Seventeen doors on each one
& no one has keys.
& the mystery limericksmith wrote this limerick for the show:
There once was a tomcat named Spike
Who’d sing from my fence every night
My friends would often say:
“You should shoo him away”
But he only sang songs that I liked!
Since the show last week was about Indiepop A To Z, & since it was seventh in an ongoing series, & since you probably weren't here when it started, I thought the "Songs Of The Day" this week would be the first five songs from the "Indiepop A To Z" collection. The first one is from Aarktica, from the album ...Or You Could Just Go Through Your Whole Life & Be Happy Anyway. It's the haunting Aura Lee. Click on it to listen. I'll leave it there until around March 12, 2007.
Tomorrow: I may hide, but I may also have hied.
Here are the winning haikus from last week's free for all. Not a one wrote a haiku about indiepop. That saddens me. This week's theme is "hiding." Don't Hide! Write a haiku instead!
FOURTH PLACE: Anthony
It is almost spring
Like a dark room where you wait
To yell out “surprise!”
THIRD PLACE: Barbara
Gary quit smoking
Just a few days after me
We miss it the same
SECOND PLACE: Andrew
I forget to touch
& leave crumpled in trashcans
Broken sidewalk dreams
FIRST PLACE: Maria
There are nine levels
Seventeen doors on each one
& no one has keys.
& the mystery limericksmith wrote this limerick for the show:
There once was a tomcat named Spike
Who’d sing from my fence every night
My friends would often say:
“You should shoo him away”
But he only sang songs that I liked!
Since the show last week was about Indiepop A To Z, & since it was seventh in an ongoing series, & since you probably weren't here when it started, I thought the "Songs Of The Day" this week would be the first five songs from the "Indiepop A To Z" collection. The first one is from Aarktica, from the album ...Or You Could Just Go Through Your Whole Life & Be Happy Anyway. It's the haunting Aura Lee. Click on it to listen. I'll leave it there until around March 12, 2007.
Tomorrow: I may hide, but I may also have hied.
Friday, February 23, 2007
A Friday Jaunt
Hey! Today the Indiepop list continues... I believe it's Indiepop A To Z # 7. Have I been writing it all wrong this week? What a weirdo. I'll start with the Boy Least Likely To... When will it end? Tune in to find out! That's 4:30 today. Be there or send me a card explaining why you couldn't make it & a little money for the tissues I had to buy when I missed you.
Did you notice there are more shows digitized? Did you miss them when they were first on? Or do you feel that, like episodes of Lost, you can listen to them again & again & find new clues to the mystery of me? Okay, that would be freaky. Flattering, but scary. Anyway, the two shows that I digitized for you are last week's show about Gin & the first show I did when I got back from Europe that I called the Brand New Show. Go listen to them if you know what's good for you. You heard me.
For the "Song Of The Day" today, here's a deejay mix/sampling piece of the kind I love so well by Innerstance.Beatbox (I believe the period between the name is required) from his record All Little Boys Do Silly Little Dances (they do!) called What Time Is It? (click the name to hear it). & no, I don't only like it because it samples Monty Python. I'll leave it up until March 9, 2007.
Listen today! I have made enough cookies for everyone!
Did you notice there are more shows digitized? Did you miss them when they were first on? Or do you feel that, like episodes of Lost, you can listen to them again & again & find new clues to the mystery of me? Okay, that would be freaky. Flattering, but scary. Anyway, the two shows that I digitized for you are last week's show about Gin & the first show I did when I got back from Europe that I called the Brand New Show. Go listen to them if you know what's good for you. You heard me.
For the "Song Of The Day" today, here's a deejay mix/sampling piece of the kind I love so well by Innerstance.Beatbox (I believe the period between the name is required) from his record All Little Boys Do Silly Little Dances (they do!) called What Time Is It? (click the name to hear it). & no, I don't only like it because it samples Monty Python. I'll leave it up until March 9, 2007.
Listen today! I have made enough cookies for everyone!
Thursday, February 22, 2007
If There Are Letters To Be Answered, By Gum I'll Answer Them
But there aren't. Am I no longer a mystery to you? Why don't you write me some email? I will respond in public like a minor celebrity!
Even better, why don't you take this survey about programming on KOOP? Make sure you say Self Help Radio is your favorite show. But otherwise, be honest about what you think - & you could win neat stuff too!
Today's "Song Of The Day" is heavily influenced by My Bloody Valentine & the band came into existence during their heyday, but the Swirlies have charms all their own. This song is a noisy pop gem from their record Blonder Tongue Audio Baton & is the wonderful song Pancake in honor of the lunch I had today. Mmmm. It's a delicious song, but its shelflife is two weeks - it won't be here after March 8, 2007.
Back to my indiepop list... I've removed British Sea Power - too late-period indie/postpunk - but I may add the truly postpunk stylings of Brian Brian... Let me listen to that again...
Even better, why don't you take this survey about programming on KOOP? Make sure you say Self Help Radio is your favorite show. But otherwise, be honest about what you think - & you could win neat stuff too!
Today's "Song Of The Day" is heavily influenced by My Bloody Valentine & the band came into existence during their heyday, but the Swirlies have charms all their own. This song is a noisy pop gem from their record Blonder Tongue Audio Baton & is the wonderful song Pancake in honor of the lunch I had today. Mmmm. It's a delicious song, but its shelflife is two weeks - it won't be here after March 8, 2007.
Back to my indiepop list... I've removed British Sea Power - too late-period indie/postpunk - but I may add the truly postpunk stylings of Brian Brian... Let me listen to that again...
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Whither Indiepop A To Z # 6?
This is a true story. I went to Germany in 1992 & for some reason I only took four or five mix tapes with me. As if, somehow, five times ninety minutes would last during the plane ride. I was a dork. The batteries in my Walkman lasted longer than those tapes. Anyway, I got very familiar with them & even today, if I happen to hear a song from those tapes, I will expect to hear the next song to play - even if I am listening to the original album the song is on. Those songs remind me of getting lost in Frankfurt, trying to ask for directions, staring at buildings that seemed to me older than time.
The point of this is that, on those five tapes, several songs recurred. I had made the tapes over the course of a couple of years & I always favored particular songs. It was annoying to hear them over & over in Germany, especially since they seemed out of place on every tape.
When I got back, I was like, Fuck this. I need a random song generator to make tapes for me. Since I didn't know how to build a random song generator, I simply began to look at my albums, cassettes & CDs & put the tracks in a long computer file & then, when that was completed (it took a while), I started at the a's & began to make mix tapes. I did this for several years & still have the tapes somewhere. I think I got to the m's. Most of those tapes are really fun to listen to, but since they're on cassettes, a format that's going to die sooner than later, they'll probably never be used again. I stopped making the tapes probably just a couple years after I started - but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
So, too, the idea, when I started on Self Help Radio back when it was an hour, of occasionally dipping into the OCD side of me (with help from the bands list at twee.net) to attempt the impossible - to play as many indiepop songs from a to z as I could in my lifetime. So, according to this playlist here, I did three shows on Self Help Radio in 2003. For some reason, it didn't feel right, & when I was talking to Jennifer of Ear Candy, we sort of agreed it would fit better on Ear Candy. So, around 2004 or so, when I subbed Ear Candy, or when Jennifer didn't have anything else to do, we started. You can hear five of those shows linked on my archive page. As I said yesterday, I don't know why I never archived the first show. It may not have been recorded.
Jennifer seemed exasperated at continuing (you can hear her as we muddle through the b's) so I figured I'd let it die quietly. But then, a couple of months ago, I was like, No. It's a fun idea, it's just weird enough to work toward, & indiepop sounds really good when you play a bunch of it together. Playing indiepop, indie-influenced stuff, & the influences themselves sound cool. & I confess I like how a list can sound as good as it does.
Just please don't ask me to do the same thing with garage rock or electronica. My head would explode. But do expect me to continue with this throughout 2007. Let's see how far we go.
Over on that same archive page, you can see I've digitized a couple of shows from January. Interested in Owls? What about what I liked from 1971? Well, if you missed the shows, they are there for your consumption. Have fun!
What? You expect a "Song Of The Day"? How about this retro-sounding gem from the Radio Dept.? I like this song a little too much. It's called The Worst Taste In Music & clicking on the name will let you hear it. It's from their record of last year called Pet Grief, which should have made my best of but I must've forgotten about it. I won't forget to remove the mp3 two weeks from today, on March 7, so get it now!
The point of this is that, on those five tapes, several songs recurred. I had made the tapes over the course of a couple of years & I always favored particular songs. It was annoying to hear them over & over in Germany, especially since they seemed out of place on every tape.
When I got back, I was like, Fuck this. I need a random song generator to make tapes for me. Since I didn't know how to build a random song generator, I simply began to look at my albums, cassettes & CDs & put the tracks in a long computer file & then, when that was completed (it took a while), I started at the a's & began to make mix tapes. I did this for several years & still have the tapes somewhere. I think I got to the m's. Most of those tapes are really fun to listen to, but since they're on cassettes, a format that's going to die sooner than later, they'll probably never be used again. I stopped making the tapes probably just a couple years after I started - but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
So, too, the idea, when I started on Self Help Radio back when it was an hour, of occasionally dipping into the OCD side of me (with help from the bands list at twee.net) to attempt the impossible - to play as many indiepop songs from a to z as I could in my lifetime. So, according to this playlist here, I did three shows on Self Help Radio in 2003. For some reason, it didn't feel right, & when I was talking to Jennifer of Ear Candy, we sort of agreed it would fit better on Ear Candy. So, around 2004 or so, when I subbed Ear Candy, or when Jennifer didn't have anything else to do, we started. You can hear five of those shows linked on my archive page. As I said yesterday, I don't know why I never archived the first show. It may not have been recorded.
Jennifer seemed exasperated at continuing (you can hear her as we muddle through the b's) so I figured I'd let it die quietly. But then, a couple of months ago, I was like, No. It's a fun idea, it's just weird enough to work toward, & indiepop sounds really good when you play a bunch of it together. Playing indiepop, indie-influenced stuff, & the influences themselves sound cool. & I confess I like how a list can sound as good as it does.
Just please don't ask me to do the same thing with garage rock or electronica. My head would explode. But do expect me to continue with this throughout 2007. Let's see how far we go.
Over on that same archive page, you can see I've digitized a couple of shows from January. Interested in Owls? What about what I liked from 1971? Well, if you missed the shows, they are there for your consumption. Have fun!
What? You expect a "Song Of The Day"? How about this retro-sounding gem from the Radio Dept.? I like this song a little too much. It's called The Worst Taste In Music & clicking on the name will let you hear it. It's from their record of last year called Pet Grief, which should have made my best of but I must've forgotten about it. I won't forget to remove the mp3 two weeks from today, on March 7, so get it now!
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Preface To Indiepop A To Z # 6: What Happened To The First Five?
What is this thing called "indiepop"? Is it more "indie" than "pop"? Is it something, like "God," which is defined by the likes & dislikes of the believer?
You can read this article called "Twee As Fuck" on Pitchfork if you want to read someone's definition of indiepop, as well as a lot of names dropped to give you context. Since I'm not going to try to define "indiepop" here, I also probably won't drop many names. In fact, I'll just completely cop out & repeat Justice Potter Stewart's remark about pornography but in an indiepop context: I know it when I hear it.
But I also hear a lot more than a single genre when I listen to music. I hear musical influences - like, "Say, does the Blondie song 'Denis' sound like a Buddy Holly song?" or "Doesn't that Elvis Costello song sound like a slowed-down version of the Stones' 'The Last Time'?" - & I also pay attention to the subject matter. I'm a sucker (as everyone knows) for songs about relationships starting & relationships falling apart. I like clever wordplay. I like songs that are fast & jangly. It turns out these three things describe a lot of indiepop, so I gravitated at some point toward indiepop.
Friends often tell me the one thing they don't like about indiepop is that it sounds happy while the lyrics are sad & sappy. I totally dig that. How great to dance to something that's completely broken-hearted! What, you've never danced to "Love Will Tear Us Apart"? & no, that's not indiepop. That's postpunk. Do you need a checklist?
Although, having said that, a lot of indiepop is more affected than natural, which should disqualify it I suppose - "It's not real!" - but the sound - the sound of indiepop - much like a lot of retro music or electronica - even if it doesn't have the soul or feeling behind it - the sound is enjoyable enough. Some of the singers may annoy, some my cloy, some may be talentless & have strange speech impediments, but if the sound is indiepoppy, it'll sound good.
Most of all, indiepop reminds me of being young. It reminds me of a time when I believed in love & when I could still feel in love & I could still feel heartbroken. Nowadays those feelings, if I stumble upon them, feel like echoes of sounds I haven't heard for years. Except when they're in indiepop songs. Then they make complete sense, & I feel them anew.
What I've written above is what my brain says when I ask it, "What is indiepop?" Typically, it's not a definition, it's just a shuffling of observations. That's what my brain does when you ask it that kind of question. Just never never never ask it, "What is the color green?" I've lost an entire weekend to questions like that before.
The "Song Of The Day" is not indiepop. It's New Wave, which I seem to find myself listening to at work a lot, although while I was writing this, I was listening to Starlet, which is indiepop. Never mind. This song is by the Japanese New Wave band (much beloved by Devo & David Byrne, among others) called the Plastics. It's from their self-titled record & it's the song Robot. Click on the name to hear it. The song is in no way an endorsement of robots. They want to destroy all humans, so we must guard against them. But it's okay to hear a song about them. I'll remove it on March 6, 2007, before a robot removes me.
Tomorrow: a brief history of obsessive-compulsion.
You can read this article called "Twee As Fuck" on Pitchfork if you want to read someone's definition of indiepop, as well as a lot of names dropped to give you context. Since I'm not going to try to define "indiepop" here, I also probably won't drop many names. In fact, I'll just completely cop out & repeat Justice Potter Stewart's remark about pornography but in an indiepop context: I know it when I hear it.
But I also hear a lot more than a single genre when I listen to music. I hear musical influences - like, "Say, does the Blondie song 'Denis' sound like a Buddy Holly song?" or "Doesn't that Elvis Costello song sound like a slowed-down version of the Stones' 'The Last Time'?" - & I also pay attention to the subject matter. I'm a sucker (as everyone knows) for songs about relationships starting & relationships falling apart. I like clever wordplay. I like songs that are fast & jangly. It turns out these three things describe a lot of indiepop, so I gravitated at some point toward indiepop.
Friends often tell me the one thing they don't like about indiepop is that it sounds happy while the lyrics are sad & sappy. I totally dig that. How great to dance to something that's completely broken-hearted! What, you've never danced to "Love Will Tear Us Apart"? & no, that's not indiepop. That's postpunk. Do you need a checklist?
Although, having said that, a lot of indiepop is more affected than natural, which should disqualify it I suppose - "It's not real!" - but the sound - the sound of indiepop - much like a lot of retro music or electronica - even if it doesn't have the soul or feeling behind it - the sound is enjoyable enough. Some of the singers may annoy, some my cloy, some may be talentless & have strange speech impediments, but if the sound is indiepoppy, it'll sound good.
Most of all, indiepop reminds me of being young. It reminds me of a time when I believed in love & when I could still feel in love & I could still feel heartbroken. Nowadays those feelings, if I stumble upon them, feel like echoes of sounds I haven't heard for years. Except when they're in indiepop songs. Then they make complete sense, & I feel them anew.
What I've written above is what my brain says when I ask it, "What is indiepop?" Typically, it's not a definition, it's just a shuffling of observations. That's what my brain does when you ask it that kind of question. Just never never never ask it, "What is the color green?" I've lost an entire weekend to questions like that before.
The "Song Of The Day" is not indiepop. It's New Wave, which I seem to find myself listening to at work a lot, although while I was writing this, I was listening to Starlet, which is indiepop. Never mind. This song is by the Japanese New Wave band (much beloved by Devo & David Byrne, among others) called the Plastics. It's from their self-titled record & it's the song Robot. Click on the name to hear it. The song is in no way an endorsement of robots. They want to destroy all humans, so we must guard against them. But it's okay to hear a song about them. I'll remove it on March 6, 2007, before a robot removes me.
Tomorrow: a brief history of obsessive-compulsion.