Fellow lovers of our future robot overlords, let me beseech you, in this cold, cold times, press the coldest metal to your face, grip it tightly in frostbitten hands, lay with it, learn to prefer it to warm, imperfect flesh. Because in the process of our obsolescence, we will find our only consolation with the cold alloys of our robot paramours.
& the music they shall sing to us will be the music you can hear on Dickenbock Electronics, my (usually) every three week or so electronica showcase, a new episode of which is available for your listening pleasure at self help radio dot net.
Produced as a public service for the Committee to Replace Organics on Planet Earth, or CROPE. CROPE is pleased to announce that it now has a human on its Board Of Directors.
Go! Listen now! While you still have a choice!
Saturday, November 06, 2010
Friday, November 05, 2010
The Face In The Furor
Aw, did the season start too soon for you? Here are handy tips for making sure you don't catch cold & miss out on the wonders of winter:
1) Keep it in your pants. Whatever it is, if it's not in your pants, it's colder than when it is in your pants, & when whatever it is is cold, it can lower your immune defenses, to let a dreadful cold sneak in & lay you low.
2) Eat plenty of healthy. Yes, healthy often suffers at the hands & feet of unhealthy, which is available in most stores, but surely you can find healthy wherever it is sold & consume more of it. Studies show eating a lot of healthy often keeps you well.
3) If you must exercise, make sure it's your brain. Too many famous people who once were alive & fit are now dead but did they think the right things? I'm not so sure. Reading is good, but also just pondering is worth your while.
4) Perhaps you should also be in love. While nine out of fourteen doctors find love to be distracting unless the sex is good, researchers are fixing the data to show a connection between love in your life & physical well-being. Look it up!
5) Your pets need to go for a walk. This applies mainly to dogs, who carry loads of diseases, but who, when you walk them, spread those germs outdoors & not in the confines of your lovely home.
6) I find alcohol to be delicious. Not so much if it's in medications, like that awful one that you take just so the alcohol in it will make you sleepy. But if that's all you can get - sometimes in the middle of the night, it is - salut!
7) Friends don't let friends get sick. If your friend is sick, you have not been a good friend & it means you probably don't respect him or her very much. Plus, that friend being sick may make you sick. Goodbye, friend!
8) Snow is more cold than soft. It does not make a nice pillow for cold winter sleepytime. Even if, in this tough economy, all you can afford to live under is a bridge. People have been known to make this mistake, or maybe it's just me.
Well! The staff & homemakers at Self Help Radio hope you enjoy this winter in the same way you didn't last year, & we hope these nine simple rules will force you to stay well all through the season & only get the flu perhaps in early spring when you least expect it.
1) Keep it in your pants. Whatever it is, if it's not in your pants, it's colder than when it is in your pants, & when whatever it is is cold, it can lower your immune defenses, to let a dreadful cold sneak in & lay you low.
2) Eat plenty of healthy. Yes, healthy often suffers at the hands & feet of unhealthy, which is available in most stores, but surely you can find healthy wherever it is sold & consume more of it. Studies show eating a lot of healthy often keeps you well.
3) If you must exercise, make sure it's your brain. Too many famous people who once were alive & fit are now dead but did they think the right things? I'm not so sure. Reading is good, but also just pondering is worth your while.
4) Perhaps you should also be in love. While nine out of fourteen doctors find love to be distracting unless the sex is good, researchers are fixing the data to show a connection between love in your life & physical well-being. Look it up!
5) Your pets need to go for a walk. This applies mainly to dogs, who carry loads of diseases, but who, when you walk them, spread those germs outdoors & not in the confines of your lovely home.
6) I find alcohol to be delicious. Not so much if it's in medications, like that awful one that you take just so the alcohol in it will make you sleepy. But if that's all you can get - sometimes in the middle of the night, it is - salut!
7) Friends don't let friends get sick. If your friend is sick, you have not been a good friend & it means you probably don't respect him or her very much. Plus, that friend being sick may make you sick. Goodbye, friend!
8) Snow is more cold than soft. It does not make a nice pillow for cold winter sleepytime. Even if, in this tough economy, all you can afford to live under is a bridge. People have been known to make this mistake, or maybe it's just me.
Well! The staff & homemakers at Self Help Radio hope you enjoy this winter in the same way you didn't last year, & we hope these nine simple rules will force you to stay well all through the season & only get the flu perhaps in early spring when you least expect it.
Tuesday, November 02, 2010
But Did You Vote?
Sure, sure, this week's episode of Self Help Radio, which is about hunger, or being hungry, is now available for your listening pleasure at self help radio dot net, but that seems so unimportant. Don't you think? Because there's this crazy election going on! You should have voted. Did you vote?
Some people think it's foolish. Some don't care. Some think it's buying into a corrupt system. All I can say is, there's probably some truth to the negative comments. But it sure feels nice to vote. Even if it's voting against someone.
& who knows? Maybe one day we'll not get to vote anymore. You might at least want to say you did something so quaint - & desirable - once in your life.
Or maybe you'd rather listen to Self Help Radio?
Some people think it's foolish. Some don't care. Some think it's buying into a corrupt system. All I can say is, there's probably some truth to the negative comments. But it sure feels nice to vote. Even if it's voting against someone.
& who knows? Maybe one day we'll not get to vote anymore. You might at least want to say you did something so quaint - & desirable - once in your life.
Or maybe you'd rather listen to Self Help Radio?
Monday, November 01, 2010
Oh, You Already Know What's Important About Tomorrow
Yes! & it's not my stupid radio show. It's that you vote! Even if it seems ridiculous or hopeless, even if you haven't really cared in months, even if the media have already told you who's won - VOTE!
The choices aren't so great, I'll grant you. But at least you have something like a choice, right? One time, on KOOP, there was this inane show - it's probably still on - where the host, a simple but amiable fellow, was interviewing some high muckety-muck from Cuba during one of their "elections," & he asked him, "What's voter turnout in Cuba?" The man said proudly, "Ninety-nine percent of the population votes!" The host gosh-wowed about that & then tsk-tsked the low turnout in the United States, all the while never asking the most important question, which is: but aren't they voting for a single party? If that's the case, could there be another reason they go to the polls - perhaps because they might be punished if they don't?
Perhaps we should punish Americans if they don't vote. But then again, there is a punishment - have you seen the people who run our country? I don't think a one of us could stand to be in a room with a random sampling of any of them.
Vote! Vote! Vote! I say. It feels nice.
& if you're up early enough, listen to me tell you to vote on 88.1 WRFL fm! Don't wait to listen to it later when I archive it on self help radio dot net. It won't make any sense. But actually, you can listen to my shows any time. That'd be great.
The choices aren't so great, I'll grant you. But at least you have something like a choice, right? One time, on KOOP, there was this inane show - it's probably still on - where the host, a simple but amiable fellow, was interviewing some high muckety-muck from Cuba during one of their "elections," & he asked him, "What's voter turnout in Cuba?" The man said proudly, "Ninety-nine percent of the population votes!" The host gosh-wowed about that & then tsk-tsked the low turnout in the United States, all the while never asking the most important question, which is: but aren't they voting for a single party? If that's the case, could there be another reason they go to the polls - perhaps because they might be punished if they don't?
Perhaps we should punish Americans if they don't vote. But then again, there is a punishment - have you seen the people who run our country? I don't think a one of us could stand to be in a room with a random sampling of any of them.
Vote! Vote! Vote! I say. It feels nice.
& if you're up early enough, listen to me tell you to vote on 88.1 WRFL fm! Don't wait to listen to it later when I archive it on self help radio dot net. It won't make any sense. But actually, you can listen to my shows any time. That'd be great.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Whither Hungry?
That sounds like something a pretentious waiter might say instead of "What can I get you?"
Billions of people in our world live in a state called hunger. Batman might have told members of the Justice League, "Hunger is good for the soul," but that just means he thinks starving children are more soulful than well-fed ones. Which is terrible logic, for both me & him. But it sucks for the Batman since he has a better reputation than I do.
Self Help Radio explores hunger this week because it realized that, about halfway through most of its shows, it could really use a snack. & not something junk food-y, like chips or nuts or whatever. A substantial amount of food, like a sandwich perhaps, or maybe one of those things that other cultures make which aren't really sandwiches but emulate sandwiches in a delicious manner, like a burrito, or a samosa, or even pizza, folded over like they do in New York. Mmmm.
Of course, Self Help Radio is also proud to explore issues of lasting import, like hunger, which has become more prevalent in this country during our Great Recession, & will probably continue to increase, since Self Help Radio expects the worst. & boy, does the worst deliver.
Self Help Radio will be full of depressing facts this week, like this one:
36.3 million people - including 13 million children - live in households that experience hunger or the risk of hunger. This represents more than one in ten households in the United States (11.2 percent). This is an increase of 1.4 million, from 34.9, million in 2002.
Luckily, Self Help Radio will accompany these facts with awesome music to offset this gloomy information.
Billions of people in our world live in a state called hunger. Batman might have told members of the Justice League, "Hunger is good for the soul," but that just means he thinks starving children are more soulful than well-fed ones. Which is terrible logic, for both me & him. But it sucks for the Batman since he has a better reputation than I do.
Self Help Radio explores hunger this week because it realized that, about halfway through most of its shows, it could really use a snack. & not something junk food-y, like chips or nuts or whatever. A substantial amount of food, like a sandwich perhaps, or maybe one of those things that other cultures make which aren't really sandwiches but emulate sandwiches in a delicious manner, like a burrito, or a samosa, or even pizza, folded over like they do in New York. Mmmm.
Of course, Self Help Radio is also proud to explore issues of lasting import, like hunger, which has become more prevalent in this country during our Great Recession, & will probably continue to increase, since Self Help Radio expects the worst. & boy, does the worst deliver.
Self Help Radio will be full of depressing facts this week, like this one:
36.3 million people - including 13 million children - live in households that experience hunger or the risk of hunger. This represents more than one in ten households in the United States (11.2 percent). This is an increase of 1.4 million, from 34.9, million in 2002.
Luckily, Self Help Radio will accompany these facts with awesome music to offset this gloomy information.
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Correcting The Unfairness Of Holidays
Living in West Virginia for a year did some damage, it's true. For one thing, it was such an awful place to live (& really, I just lived in Huntington, so I will freely admit that I can't say anything about any other town in West Virginia except I'm certain it's probably better) that it makes every other place look wonderful by comparison. I mean, after living in Huntington for about ten months, I visited Dallas & thought to myself, "I'd prefer living here." Dallas. Dallas, Texas. How awful must a town be to make Dallas look attractive?
One thing that happened around this time last year - & one of the neighbors scolded me for this lack of knowledge, as I didn't read the paper or watch the news - is that the town simply rescheduled Halloween. Halloween, you may recall, fell on a Saturday last year - a perfectly respectful day of the week for a perfectly respectable holiday. But the Thursday before, kids knocked on our doors tricking & treating. Why? Because the city decided Thursday was a better day for Halloween. Thursday!
I did wait for the rogue child, possessed of independent thought & an anarchic spirit, to come on Saturday, but no luck. I suppose they knew the rest of the city had given all its candy away on Thursday. Thursday! The kids had to sit at home on Saturday knowing full well the entire rest of the country was out trick-or-treating that night. Absurd.
It was burned into my Texan brain that that must be the case in Lexington, too. After all, it's just a hundred miles to the west. Of course, it's also two decades into the future here - so I was fooled. Someone told me - I don't remember who - or even if it were some delusion fostered by a thought-stunting year in the backwards world of Huntington - that Halloween would be on Saturday in Lexington.
The wife & I took the dogs for a late walk last night & I made her bring candy along with us to give to the trick-or-treaters I knew we'd meet out & about.
Of course there were none. Halloween is tomorrow. Lexington exists in the real world. I need to get used to that.
One thing that happened around this time last year - & one of the neighbors scolded me for this lack of knowledge, as I didn't read the paper or watch the news - is that the town simply rescheduled Halloween. Halloween, you may recall, fell on a Saturday last year - a perfectly respectful day of the week for a perfectly respectable holiday. But the Thursday before, kids knocked on our doors tricking & treating. Why? Because the city decided Thursday was a better day for Halloween. Thursday!
I did wait for the rogue child, possessed of independent thought & an anarchic spirit, to come on Saturday, but no luck. I suppose they knew the rest of the city had given all its candy away on Thursday. Thursday! The kids had to sit at home on Saturday knowing full well the entire rest of the country was out trick-or-treating that night. Absurd.
It was burned into my Texan brain that that must be the case in Lexington, too. After all, it's just a hundred miles to the west. Of course, it's also two decades into the future here - so I was fooled. Someone told me - I don't remember who - or even if it were some delusion fostered by a thought-stunting year in the backwards world of Huntington - that Halloween would be on Saturday in Lexington.
The wife & I took the dogs for a late walk last night & I made her bring candy along with us to give to the trick-or-treaters I knew we'd meet out & about.
Of course there were none. Halloween is tomorrow. Lexington exists in the real world. I need to get used to that.
Friday, October 29, 2010
My Unhappy Is Your Zombie
I can't go to the Jon Stewart rally this weekend, which makes me sad. It's because of my dumb animals, who are my best friends & who I love more than anything. But still. Seriously, dudes?
I'm still not going to do a show this weekend. I'm going to watch the rally on television. So there.
I did do a show yesterday - subbing for two nice people named Katie & Travis - all about zombies. A nice caller asked me to put it online so I have. It's here: at the top of the page. That means, by the way, that you have three Self Help Radio shows for your Halloween pleasure, if you'd like: the aforementioned show about zombies, & the show I did Tuesday about haunted houses & last year's show about werewolves. What a punishment of screams!
I need to go sulk now.
I'm still not going to do a show this weekend. I'm going to watch the rally on television. So there.
I did do a show yesterday - subbing for two nice people named Katie & Travis - all about zombies. A nice caller asked me to put it online so I have. It's here: at the top of the page. That means, by the way, that you have three Self Help Radio shows for your Halloween pleasure, if you'd like: the aforementioned show about zombies, & the show I did Tuesday about haunted houses & last year's show about werewolves. What a punishment of screams!
I need to go sulk now.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
I Think This Blog Is Haunted
Boo!
Be wary, intrepid traveler, for Self Help Radio today emanated eerily from a haunted radio station, with many songs about haunted houses & not a single song about a haunted apartment or condominium. Really, not even one about a haunted hotel room or a haunted spare bedroom in the back with access only to a bathroom, no shower. Ghosts & other malevolent spirits need their space, I guess.
Also: boo!
Here's a trick: the show, which aired this morning, is available for listening now at any time at self help radio dot net . Here's a treat: you can download the songs from the show in mp3 form by clicking here to get the zip file . Over ninety minutes of fright, featuring some things you didn't hear on the show! Get them now! They're only available until the morning of November 1!
Did I mention: boo!
Would you prefer a show about werewolves? That's so last year - but you can listen to that show to right over here.
Thanks for listening & have a happy Halloween!
Be wary, intrepid traveler, for Self Help Radio today emanated eerily from a haunted radio station, with many songs about haunted houses & not a single song about a haunted apartment or condominium. Really, not even one about a haunted hotel room or a haunted spare bedroom in the back with access only to a bathroom, no shower. Ghosts & other malevolent spirits need their space, I guess.
Also: boo!
Here's a trick: the show, which aired this morning, is available for listening now at any time at self help radio dot net . Here's a treat: you can download the songs from the show in mp3 form by clicking here to get the zip file . Over ninety minutes of fright, featuring some things you didn't hear on the show! Get them now! They're only available until the morning of November 1!
Did I mention: boo!
Would you prefer a show about werewolves? That's so last year - but you can listen to that show to right over here.
Thanks for listening & have a happy Halloween!
Monday, October 25, 2010
Especially Self-Conscious In My Dreams
It seems. I had a dream where, when I stepped onto a bridge, it slowly, as if made of elastic, dipped into the water. What do you do when your own dreams call you fatty?
You soldier on. For example, early tomorrow morning you'll get to hear Self Help Radio's Halloween 2010 show, which is about haunted houses. If you perhaps become a "fan" or "like" (whatever the case is) Self Help Radio on Facebook, you might be able to get haunted house music to play yourself. Or maybe you can just look at the page - it's located right here & if it's not a trick & truly a treat, it'll last until Halloween.
They like Halloween around here. I may have to walk through several graveyards to get to the station tonight. I hope it's not too ghoulish.
So if you can listen tomorrow, it's on 88.1 fm WRFL too early in the morning (4:30 am in fact) on the radio & online. Or I'll have the show up at the Self Help Radio website some time tomorrow. In time for Halloween!
You soldier on. For example, early tomorrow morning you'll get to hear Self Help Radio's Halloween 2010 show, which is about haunted houses. If you perhaps become a "fan" or "like" (whatever the case is) Self Help Radio on Facebook, you might be able to get haunted house music to play yourself. Or maybe you can just look at the page - it's located right here & if it's not a trick & truly a treat, it'll last until Halloween.
They like Halloween around here. I may have to walk through several graveyards to get to the station tonight. I hope it's not too ghoulish.
So if you can listen tomorrow, it's on 88.1 fm WRFL too early in the morning (4:30 am in fact) on the radio & online. Or I'll have the show up at the Self Help Radio website some time tomorrow. In time for Halloween!
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Whither Haunted Houses?
Every Halloween Self Help Radio does some sort of Halloween show. I can't help it. I started out thinking I could do "general" holiday shows, you know, with a song about a ghost then a song about a vampire then a song about a zombie, but I started thinking, you know, Self Help Radio specializes in specific themes. The only holiday that I somewhat celebrate with a more or less general theme is Christmas, & that's because it would just be weird to do an entire show about mistletoe (for example).
So, my first Self Help Radio Halloween was of the generalest kind. The next year (Halloween 2003) was about ghosts. Morrissey was supposed to come to town around Halloween 2004, so I preempted my Halloween show for a Smiths show, but, terrifying as it was, he cancelled the concert. My 2005 show was about vampires, my 2006 show was about monsters, my 2007 show was about zombies, my 2008 show was about witches, & last year's show was about werewolves. It may seem as though I am exhausting all the major characters in the Halloween storybook, but it's not true! This year's show is about haunted houses. Ha ha! Didn't see that coming, did you? Ha ha!
Except, you know, in the title of this entry.
By far one of the most embarrassing things that ever happened to me happened in a homemade "haunted house" in my childhood. I even once wrote a short story about it. Hey! Maybe I can find it & put it here tomorrow! Except I'll edit it for length. Possibly even make sure it's at least readable. Many of my old short stories fail the "readability" test. & not because I wrote them in my completely made-up language called Garyrag. I only translate great books into that language.
"Haunted house" in Garyrag is "griffdo eeks." Just in case you were wondering.
So, my first Self Help Radio Halloween was of the generalest kind. The next year (Halloween 2003) was about ghosts. Morrissey was supposed to come to town around Halloween 2004, so I preempted my Halloween show for a Smiths show, but, terrifying as it was, he cancelled the concert. My 2005 show was about vampires, my 2006 show was about monsters, my 2007 show was about zombies, my 2008 show was about witches, & last year's show was about werewolves. It may seem as though I am exhausting all the major characters in the Halloween storybook, but it's not true! This year's show is about haunted houses. Ha ha! Didn't see that coming, did you? Ha ha!
Except, you know, in the title of this entry.
By far one of the most embarrassing things that ever happened to me happened in a homemade "haunted house" in my childhood. I even once wrote a short story about it. Hey! Maybe I can find it & put it here tomorrow! Except I'll edit it for length. Possibly even make sure it's at least readable. Many of my old short stories fail the "readability" test. & not because I wrote them in my completely made-up language called Garyrag. I only translate great books into that language.
"Haunted house" in Garyrag is "griffdo eeks." Just in case you were wondering.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Weekends Incommunicado
Perhaps you've read this blog. Perhaps you're someone who gives a hoodley-hoo about the radio show this blog is arguably about, or the radio show programmer who writes this blog & also does the radio show. According to Google Analytics, you are about one-quarter of a person, because that's the average number of visitors this blog gets a day. I hope you didn't have a weird accident or anything!
As a regular reader (or irregular, if there's three-fourths of you missing) of this blog, you might have previously heard that the next two weekend I will have other engagements which will keep me from my regular Saturday shows. This will also mean that I probably will not be writing in this blog on those days. Whatever shall you do? It's not like there are other, more interesting blogs out there, are there? Of course there are! I read some of them more than this blog!
This week is my Halloween show, which is about haunted houses, & I will be listening to haunted house songs all the way to Missouri, where my friend LeAndra is getting married, & usually I give away Halloween CDs to people who call in to win them during the show. I can't do that this year - WRFL has a no-giveaways policy - but I can give them away on this blog & on my Facebook page, where you should also totally "like" me.
So if you don't hear from me for a couple of days, don't worry! I'm driving to Missouri. Then driving back from Missouri. The show will go on as promised!
Unless I have a weird accident or something & am reduced to one-fourth of a person.
As a regular reader (or irregular, if there's three-fourths of you missing) of this blog, you might have previously heard that the next two weekend I will have other engagements which will keep me from my regular Saturday shows. This will also mean that I probably will not be writing in this blog on those days. Whatever shall you do? It's not like there are other, more interesting blogs out there, are there? Of course there are! I read some of them more than this blog!
This week is my Halloween show, which is about haunted houses, & I will be listening to haunted house songs all the way to Missouri, where my friend LeAndra is getting married, & usually I give away Halloween CDs to people who call in to win them during the show. I can't do that this year - WRFL has a no-giveaways policy - but I can give them away on this blog & on my Facebook page, where you should also totally "like" me.
So if you don't hear from me for a couple of days, don't worry! I'm driving to Missouri. Then driving back from Missouri. The show will go on as promised!
Unless I have a weird accident or something & am reduced to one-fourth of a person.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
It's Been A Long Day; Or, I'm Exhausted
If you're the sort of person who can only read one sentence because of ADD & then has to find another blog, then let me tell you this week's episode of Self Help Radio is available for your audio enjoyment at self help radio dot net. The theme is "this or that," & there's also a new episode of my pop show, Sugar Substitute, as well. Wait, you're the sort of person who, because of your ADD, can't get this far in a paragraph. My bad.
I do have an excuse for the tardiness in putting the show up, however. Some working dudes were repairing or updating or reinstalling or doing busy work on a power line & my electricity was off for about three hours in the middle of the day. True story! I decided, after waiting two & a half hours, to take a nap, & then, as I was dozing off, I woke to the hum of refrigerator starting up.
Which is better, it's true, than being awakened from a nap, as I often am, by the tap-tapping of annoying beagles who just want to go outside to chase chipmunks.
I do have an excuse for the tardiness in putting the show up, however. Some working dudes were repairing or updating or reinstalling or doing busy work on a power line & my electricity was off for about three hours in the middle of the day. True story! I decided, after waiting two & a half hours, to take a nap, & then, as I was dozing off, I woke to the hum of refrigerator starting up.
Which is better, it's true, than being awakened from a nap, as I often am, by the tap-tapping of annoying beagles who just want to go outside to chase chipmunks.
Monday, October 18, 2010
This Week In Media Manipulation
Hey! If you're reading this right now, & "right now" is defined as "six to eight pm Eastern time," you can listen to me play electronical music on WRFL 88.1 during that time. If you're not in Lexington (where it's been a lovely autumn day), you can listen online at wrfl.fm.
If you are reading this later, & "later" is defined as "sometime between Monday night & Tuesday morning," be aware that, mere hours from now, after I've left the deejay booth cold & alone on a Monday night, I will return cold & lonesome early Tuesday morning for a new Sugar Substitute & a new Self Help Radio. Sleep? Who needs sleep?
Actually, I'm craving pizza. I'll probably eat pizza in the next forty-eight hours, Then I will fall asleep on a pizza. That's my promise to you.
If you are reading this later, & "later" is defined as "sometime between Monday night & Tuesday morning," be aware that, mere hours from now, after I've left the deejay booth cold & alone on a Monday night, I will return cold & lonesome early Tuesday morning for a new Sugar Substitute & a new Self Help Radio. Sleep? Who needs sleep?
Actually, I'm craving pizza. I'll probably eat pizza in the next forty-eight hours, Then I will fall asleep on a pizza. That's my promise to you.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Whither This Or That?
Sometimes, while I'm doing Self Help Radio shows, I think of this dude I sort of knew in Austin. He was one of those loud-mouthed know-it-alls who would call the show all the time & ask questions he knew the answers to so that he could remember the answer the second after he asked. He seemed to like my show & I was always nice to him, & he knew other deejays at the station so often showed up to talk & talk & talk. Anyway, he once sent me a list of themes he thought I should do - themes I'm sure he had plenty of ideas about it.
Now, I can be pretty snobby - & I certainly don't want to be "obvious" about themes. Still, I've picked some easy ones. But his - well, they were both extremely general & generally banal. They were things like "rain" & "cars" & "crying." It's not to say I wouldn't one day do shows with those themes - in a way, they're "gimmies," easy shows to do because of the wealth of material.
But the fellow's personality & the utter unoriginality of the themes made me sniff & say, "Oh, those themes - thank you for suggesting them - but I'm looking for more challenging topics for my show..."
The truth is, sometimes I need a "gimmie." So that explains this week's theme, "this or that." How easy to find songs with the title [insert word here] or [insert other word here]! I'll be able to sleep more this weekend.
It turns out, of course, that the more general themes have so many more songs that it's actually harder to do the shows. I've been listening to songs all day & am nowhere near done. So. I deserve it for being such a snot. A more obscure theme might be more time-consuming in the search for songs to satisfy it. But general themes - even if they're easy - I have to spend the time. I want to pick the best songs to play, don't I?
Now, I can be pretty snobby - & I certainly don't want to be "obvious" about themes. Still, I've picked some easy ones. But his - well, they were both extremely general & generally banal. They were things like "rain" & "cars" & "crying." It's not to say I wouldn't one day do shows with those themes - in a way, they're "gimmies," easy shows to do because of the wealth of material.
But the fellow's personality & the utter unoriginality of the themes made me sniff & say, "Oh, those themes - thank you for suggesting them - but I'm looking for more challenging topics for my show..."
The truth is, sometimes I need a "gimmie." So that explains this week's theme, "this or that." How easy to find songs with the title [insert word here] or [insert other word here]! I'll be able to sleep more this weekend.
It turns out, of course, that the more general themes have so many more songs that it's actually harder to do the shows. I've been listening to songs all day & am nowhere near done. So. I deserve it for being such a snot. A more obscure theme might be more time-consuming in the search for songs to satisfy it. But general themes - even if they're easy - I have to spend the time. I want to pick the best songs to play, don't I?
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Howdy! It's Zeke Moonshine!
As promised, here's a Pony Express missive letting you know that this week's episode of the Zeke Moonshine Show - starring Zeke Moonshine - as well as old timey country & blues musicians like Wilmer Watts, Ken Maynard, Casey Bill Weldon, the Girls Of The Golden West, Patsy Montana, Skip James, Bukka White & much, much more - is now available for your listening pleasure at self help radio dot net.
If you're not interested, might I suggest you stare at this lovely photo of the Girls Of The Golden West until you find yourself in the mood?
Please remember, though Zeke has his own still, he starts drinking & playing records long before you get there. Bring your own!
If you're not interested, might I suggest you stare at this lovely photo of the Girls Of The Golden West until you find yourself in the mood?
Please remember, though Zeke has his own still, he starts drinking & playing records long before you get there. Bring your own!
Friday, October 15, 2010
Caps Lock On!
I'll probably be talking about this more as we get nearer to the time, but the Saturday shows I do - Dickenbock Electronics, Tags & Tricks, & The Zeke Moonshine Show - will be postponed - not preempted - while I am busy the next two Saturdays in a row.
NOT THIS SATURDAY! Tomorrow will be the Zeke Moonshine show as promised!
But the Saturday after next I'll be at a wedding in (of all places) Missouri, & then the next week - if the creek is willing & the Good Lord don't rise - the wife & I will try to attend Jon Stewart's Rally To Restore Sanity. (Actually, I want to go to that one - the wife wants to attend Stephen Colbert's March To Keep Fear Alive.)
This means that the Saturday shows, bless 'em, get pushed ahead a fortnight. Will you ever forgive me?
I'll mention it as the time draws ever so near. But tomorrow Zeke will be here. I PROMISE!
NOT THIS SATURDAY! Tomorrow will be the Zeke Moonshine show as promised!
But the Saturday after next I'll be at a wedding in (of all places) Missouri, & then the next week - if the creek is willing & the Good Lord don't rise - the wife & I will try to attend Jon Stewart's Rally To Restore Sanity. (Actually, I want to go to that one - the wife wants to attend Stephen Colbert's March To Keep Fear Alive.)
This means that the Saturday shows, bless 'em, get pushed ahead a fortnight. Will you ever forgive me?
I'll mention it as the time draws ever so near. But tomorrow Zeke will be here. I PROMISE!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Hap-py An-ni-ver-sar-y!
The 8th Anniversary show is now up for listening & stuff at self help radio dot net! You will have to bring your own cake & party hats. I ate it all when the show aired this morning.
On the show I gave shout-outs to all the nice people who subbed over the years but can I do it also on this blog so I will be able to read about it later when I am sober? All right then!
Big thanks & much love to Little Danny, to CJ Buchanan, to Lisa & Jay who kept the show warm while I was on a winter vacation to Europe, to Art who took the helm on Tax Day 2007, to Justin whose excellent show I miss a great deal, to my apprentices who graduated into programmership after they took over my show for a day: the lovely & whip-smart Erin, the lovely & smart-alecky Stephanie, & the lovely & grizzled Gary, who I miss & whose tattoos appear regularly in my nightmares. Finally, a big thanks to Delaney, who didn't have to make a big deal of subbing SHR but did.
I don't think I missed anyone, but maybe I did. You should tell me. I calculated that I've done over four hundred Self Help Radio shows, so I hardly gave others a chance, but I should thank the nice folks who let ME sub THEIR show over the last few years too: the Jennifers &, later, Lace, for letting me sit in the sweet seat at the late, lamented Ear Candy; Scott for sharing his noisy space at Stronger Than Dirt; Jason & Joanna, for letting me babysit their baby Pot Luck before they flew the Austin nest; Andrew, whose Heliocentric Hootenanny is very much missed; Tracy & Smokehouse who did two great blues shows on different stations on the same frequency; Little Danny who trusted me twice to handle Soul Sauce; Taylor whose Queer Waves was always better when he did it instead of me or anyone else; Mark who let me dabble in the prog without being too nerdy about it; Lisa for the Clear Spot & Jay for the Lounge Show & Art for Jamaican Gold - how kind for you to trust me to do your excellent shows; & Justin for letting me sit in on the House Call as often as he did. Like I said, I miss that show a bunch.
There are others, too many, not to mention the shows I've subbed recently on WRFL for programmers I've not met yet. In most cases, I tried to follow the programmer's style & musical genre; insofar that I came anywhere near their standards of excellence, it was because I listened like a good pupil to their tutelage. Thank you all!
I may not get to sub any Austin shows ever again, but I hope that, when my sixteenth anniversary stumbles around, I'll have many different people to thank.
Happy anniversary Self Help Radio!
On the show I gave shout-outs to all the nice people who subbed over the years but can I do it also on this blog so I will be able to read about it later when I am sober? All right then!
Big thanks & much love to Little Danny, to CJ Buchanan, to Lisa & Jay who kept the show warm while I was on a winter vacation to Europe, to Art who took the helm on Tax Day 2007, to Justin whose excellent show I miss a great deal, to my apprentices who graduated into programmership after they took over my show for a day: the lovely & whip-smart Erin, the lovely & smart-alecky Stephanie, & the lovely & grizzled Gary, who I miss & whose tattoos appear regularly in my nightmares. Finally, a big thanks to Delaney, who didn't have to make a big deal of subbing SHR but did.
I don't think I missed anyone, but maybe I did. You should tell me. I calculated that I've done over four hundred Self Help Radio shows, so I hardly gave others a chance, but I should thank the nice folks who let ME sub THEIR show over the last few years too: the Jennifers &, later, Lace, for letting me sit in the sweet seat at the late, lamented Ear Candy; Scott for sharing his noisy space at Stronger Than Dirt; Jason & Joanna, for letting me babysit their baby Pot Luck before they flew the Austin nest; Andrew, whose Heliocentric Hootenanny is very much missed; Tracy & Smokehouse who did two great blues shows on different stations on the same frequency; Little Danny who trusted me twice to handle Soul Sauce; Taylor whose Queer Waves was always better when he did it instead of me or anyone else; Mark who let me dabble in the prog without being too nerdy about it; Lisa for the Clear Spot & Jay for the Lounge Show & Art for Jamaican Gold - how kind for you to trust me to do your excellent shows; & Justin for letting me sit in on the House Call as often as he did. Like I said, I miss that show a bunch.
There are others, too many, not to mention the shows I've subbed recently on WRFL for programmers I've not met yet. In most cases, I tried to follow the programmer's style & musical genre; insofar that I came anywhere near their standards of excellence, it was because I listened like a good pupil to their tutelage. Thank you all!
I may not get to sub any Austin shows ever again, but I hope that, when my sixteenth anniversary stumbles around, I'll have many different people to thank.
Happy anniversary Self Help Radio!
Monday, October 11, 2010
Whither The Counting Numbers?
As you may or may not have guessed, this is my eighth anniversary show. My first show as "Self Help Radio" (a name that took forever for me to come up with) was October 9, 2002. (I had done two or three other shows at a different timeslot, but though they were "themed," the show wasn't guaranteed the slot, & the name hadn't been attached.) By my count, I've done 402 Self Help Radios, though that doesn't mean 402 themes. If you eliminate the "regular" shows (my end-of-the-year favorites, my Christmas shows, the indiepop a to z shows, guest shows) (but you must leave in the "year" shows for my birthday, since they are a specific theme, & also the Valentine & Halloween shows, since they, too, are about specific aspects of the holiday) (I'm torn about shows dedicated to an artist, especially the ones where I play covers of the artists instead of all the artists - I'm leaving them in!)...
I count 337 separate themes. Wow.
Not only that, & not counting "The War On Sailing," which I don't have good records of anyway, I also subbed or covered at least 174 other shows on four different radio stations plus podcasts.
(This of course doesn't count any radio I did prior to Self Help Radio. I deejayed lots of time on KVRX in the 1990s.)
It's been a busy eight years! & I'm not stopping any time soon! So please listen to the anniversary show - airing very early tomorrow on WRFL 88.1 fm in Lexington & all over the world on computer, & then archived later (I'll say when) at self help radio dot net. Self Help Radio is eight! Does that mean we're in second or third grade?
I count 337 separate themes. Wow.
Not only that, & not counting "The War On Sailing," which I don't have good records of anyway, I also subbed or covered at least 174 other shows on four different radio stations plus podcasts.
(This of course doesn't count any radio I did prior to Self Help Radio. I deejayed lots of time on KVRX in the 1990s.)
It's been a busy eight years! & I'm not stopping any time soon! So please listen to the anniversary show - airing very early tomorrow on WRFL 88.1 fm in Lexington & all over the world on computer, & then archived later (I'll say when) at self help radio dot net. Self Help Radio is eight! Does that mean we're in second or third grade?
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Preface To The Counting Numbers: The Last Preface Ever?
When I was young, I made the mistake of mispronouncing "preface" in a public situation: a dumbass debate in eighth grade history class. I pronounced it "pre-face," not "pref-iss," & remember the gentle correction by my teacher, Mrs. Lane, & the class's ridicule, in the same memory pod. I should've looked at my Mirriam-Webster. What a fool was I.
On my second blog entry, I started the idear of the "preface" to the week's theme. I had some leeway then, as I did one show a week. Not now. Now, when I should be doing a preface, I'm doing an electronica show, or a jazz show, or an old timey country/blues show. It makes the blog entry where I explain the upcoming show the same blog entry where I have to say, "Hey! Listen to the show!" I've been uncomfortable with that.
You don't care, I know. But I do. & I'm the only person who regularly reads this blog.
So, from now on, no prefaces. This is the last one. I know, this could be an internal memo, but, seriously, no one's reading this but me, the person who writes it, so who gives a fuck? I am buzzing from tonight's Dexter, I could give half a shit what some random person who's googled "buzz" & "Dexter" thinks.
But yay! I've been doing my radio show for eight years! Yay! & I'm the only one who cares! Yay! Hooray!
On my second blog entry, I started the idear of the "preface" to the week's theme. I had some leeway then, as I did one show a week. Not now. Now, when I should be doing a preface, I'm doing an electronica show, or a jazz show, or an old timey country/blues show. It makes the blog entry where I explain the upcoming show the same blog entry where I have to say, "Hey! Listen to the show!" I've been uncomfortable with that.
You don't care, I know. But I do. & I'm the only person who regularly reads this blog.
So, from now on, no prefaces. This is the last one. I know, this could be an internal memo, but, seriously, no one's reading this but me, the person who writes it, so who gives a fuck? I am buzzing from tonight's Dexter, I could give half a shit what some random person who's googled "buzz" & "Dexter" thinks.
But yay! I've been doing my radio show for eight years! Yay! & I'm the only one who cares! Yay! Hooray!
Saturday, October 09, 2010
More Tags, Less Tricks
That doesn't make any sense, I know.
But hey! There's a new episode of Tags & Tricks, the jazz show I do, featuring such jazzy geniuses as Dizzy Gillespie, Cannonball Adderley, Ornette Coleman, Billy Harper, Lester Bowie & more! available for you now to listen to at selfhelpradio.net. All this & Jackie Gleason gets slightly trash-talked too!
Aw, he's a big boy, he can handle it.
You should go listen! It's jazztastic!
Too much? Yeah, I know.
But hey! There's a new episode of Tags & Tricks, the jazz show I do, featuring such jazzy geniuses as Dizzy Gillespie, Cannonball Adderley, Ornette Coleman, Billy Harper, Lester Bowie & more! available for you now to listen to at selfhelpradio.net. All this & Jackie Gleason gets slightly trash-talked too!
Aw, he's a big boy, he can handle it.
You should go listen! It's jazztastic!
Too much? Yeah, I know.