Don't - Not In The Grass

Bad grammar & misspellings are slightly more fun to point out when they're in public places.  This picture was taken two years ago on this day here in Portland.  It encourages me to check with someone before I put a sign out, no matter what.  It of course begs the question, where am I supposed to dog shit, if not on the grass?

Interestingly, I took this picture about six months ago, also in our neighborhood:

Sad for all the green recycling bins mistaken for "a trash."  But at least I now know I should dog shit at home.

Fold Like Origami

(This image, from here, is the first that comes up in a image search for origami.)

It is true that I don't much about that other radio show I do, The Dickenbock Report on Freeform Portland, here on this blog.  It's mainly because the Dickenbock Report isn't Self Help Radio.  But the truth, except for the dumb "news reader" aspect of it, it's much more like Self Help Radio was in its first few years than it is now.  I didn't intend for that to happen - I wanted there to be more different segments - but it started to feel more right if the entire show was focused on a single theme.

For example, the show yesterday was on National Candy Day, so every song on the show was called "Candy."  That's something I have tried to do on SHR - in fact, the show this week, with the theme "Vacations," featured for the first ninety minutes all songs called "Vacation" - something that doubtless interests me more than any listener.  But it's next week's show that is kind of fascinating.

November 11 is Veteran's Day, but I didn't want to play songs about war or veterans being mistreated, so it was intriguing that it's also National Origami Day.  But.  Are there enough songs about origami that I can make a show out of it?

Perhaps.  My big thing is that I remember a song with the lyric "fold just like origami" & I can't find it anywhere.  But.  I am thinking I can pull it off.  Despite not knowing what song uses that exact phrase.  Because there are lots of songs that say "fold like origami" but that's not how the lyrics plays in my head.  There's a "just" there.

Anyway, that's all I'll say about the show I affectionately refer to as "The Dick Report."  It's on Thursdays at 8am on Freeform Portland.  It's kind of like Self Help Radio but it isn't.  & next week it might be about origami?!?

Self Help Radio 110221: Vacations

Do you need a vacation?  Wouldn't that be nice, especially as it seems to have become cold & rainy despite all objections?  If you can, please take a vacation!  If you can't, perhaps take a vacation show - which is this week's Self Help Radio.  Yes, it might be as dreary & dirty as your average highway motel, but at least no one's gotten bedbugs from a radio show!  (Not yet anyway.)

There's no air conditioning, pool or cable, but the first half of the show features songs just called "Vacation."  Why that would be a draw I'm not sure but it's the sort of accomplishment obscure radio deejays pride themselves on because no one gives them any encouragement.  Imagine what the show would be like if I were loved!  Oh, let's face it - there wouldn't be a show anymore.

How did I get from there to here?  I'm supposed to be talking about this week's show!  It's about vacations, it aired this morning on KBOO, & you can listen to it now & wherever (even on vacation!) at both the KBOO website & at the Self Help Radio website.  As usual, if you use the latter, remember the username (SHR) & the password (selfhelp).  What happens on the show is below.

Happy travels!

Self Help Radio Vacations Show

"Vacation" Connie Francis _Dreamboats & Petticoats_

"Vacation" Textones _I Can't Fight It 7"_

"Vacation" Critical Mass _Doctor Death's Volume IV: The Marvels Of Insect Life_

introduction & definitions (featuring the Definition-O-Tron 3000)

"Vacation" The Frogs _Unsealed: A Tribute To The Go-Go's_

"Vacation" The Concretes _Boyoubetterunow_

"Vacation" Duck Hunt _International Hip Swing_

"Vacation" Freezepop _Freezepop Forever_

"Vacation" The Gay _You Know The Rules_

a report from Self Help Radio Travel Correspondent Orville Francis

"Vacation (feat. J-Live)" Jazz Liberatorz _Clin D'Oeil_

"Vacation" Aaron Espe _Songs From A Small Town_

"Vacation" Beach Fossils _Beach Fossils_

"Vacation" Mermaids _Tropsicle_

"Vacation" The Blank Tapes _Vacation_

interview with Gary's radio friend Don

"Vacation" Onward Chariots _Take Me To Somewhere_

"Vacation" Florist _Holdly_

"Vacation" Chris Staples _Golden Age_

"Vacation" Sobs _Telltale Signs_

"Vacation" Pynkie _# 37_

a Self Help Radio rerun: Chuck talks about tourist films (from back in March)

"Endless Vacation" Ramones _Too Tough To Die_

"Felt Just Like Vacation" Bomb The Music Industry! _Vacation_

"Vacation Town" The Front Bottoms _Going Grey_

"The Meaney's Summer Vacations" Kevin Meaney _That's Not Right_

"Punk Vacation" Places To Hide _Strange Lyfe_

a discussion of popular vacation destinations

"Vacation Blues" T-Bone Walker _The Chronological T-Bone Walker 1947_

"Bo's Vacation" Bo Diddley _Bo Diddley Is A... Lover_

"Your Mind Is On Vacation" Mose Allison _Allison Wonderland: The Mose Allison Anthology_

"Permanent Vacation" Marion Sodd _Northern Soul Fever Volume Two_

"I Need A Vacation" Jim Backus _Andy & Pat's Groovy Cosmic Love Hour Record Collection (Funky 45s)_

"Vacation Song" Ruth Wallis _For Sophisticates Only_

a discussion of hip vacation idioms

"Natty On Vacation" Big Joe _At The Control_

"Useful Phrases While On Vacation In Russia (Introduction To Spoken Russian)" Eugene Mirman _I'm Sorry (You're Welcome)_

"Vacation In Tehran" The Judy's _Washarama_

"Two-Week Vacation" The Embarrassment _Heyday 1979-83_

"Summer Vacation" Presidents Eleven _Behind The Banana Curtain 1975-2000_

"Island Vacation" Louise Burns _Mellow Drama_

conclusion & goodbye

"Sad Vacation" Johnny Thunders _Hurt Me_

"Al's Vacation" Shack _Zilch_

"Big Vacation" Dressy Bessy _Come Out, Come Out_

"No Vacation" The Apples In Stereo _Travellers In Space & Time_

"Take A Vacation!" The Young Veins _Take A Vacation!_

"Brak's Hawaiian Vacation" Brak _Space Ghost's Surf & Turf_

Whither Vacations?

(image found here)

Do people vacation in November? Can we say for the sake of a radio show that they do?  Thanks!

Since people vacation in November, it seemed appropriate for Self Help Radio to spend some time playing songs & talking about vacation.  It's been a while since I've been on a vacation myself, unless you want to consider this pandemic a vacation, which I do not.  But it's true that the show itself is a kind of vacation from the intense five-guest programs I've been doing recently.  Just two guests tonight!  & maybe I'll banter with a computer or something.

Self Help Radio's vacation show starts promptly at midnight tonight & lasts until 3am.  Only three hours?!?  If that's all I can get, I'll take it.  It'll happen on 90.7fm KBOO in Portland & online everywhere at kboo.fm.  Remember to take some snaps.  You'll want to show people where you've gone afterwards.

Preface To Vacations: Is Halloween Over Yet?

(image by Mr. Joshua)

It's over, yeah?  The kids are all inside, deep in their sugar comas?  The parents have self-medicated?  We've turned off the lights & let the blow-up things deflate?  Is that true?

You see, I didn't want to write about this week's show until Halloween was over, but also I didn't want to wait until tomorrow.  It's a whole new show tomorrow.  Nothing to do with Halloween.  It'll be a show about vacations.  I will talk more about it tomorrow.

Damn it!  The doorbell!  More kids!  I wanted to save the rest of this candy!

Halloween Shows!

As an FYI, there are quite a few Self Help Radio Halloween shows - basically every Halloween show since 2005, or a total of seventeen (17!) Halloween shows, over at the Self Help Radio website.  It's not linked on the page, but if you click here:

https://www.selfhelpradio.net/halloween.html

You can get to those shows.  Please remember (as it says on the page) the username (SHR) & the password (selfhelp) to listen.  I make no claims about the quality of the shows - I can barely remember doing most of them - but gosh I had fun making them!  Perhaps there's some joy to be had listening on a Halloween night.

Halloween Pumpkin Movies & Stuff!

(image from here)

On this year's Halloween episode of Self Help Radio, we played songs about & talked about pumpkins.

During that show, there was another installment of Chuck's Happily Unsophisticated Cinema Korner, in which our resident cinephile talked about movies involving pumpkins & Halloween.  Here are helpful links so you can see what we talked about & then see the movies!

Here is Chuck's twitter thread, which leads to his playlists.

He has two playlists on Youtube to check out, one featuring family-friendly films (G to PG), which you can find if you click here; & the other featuring more adult films (PG-13 to NC-17) which Chuck calls "Pumpkins (After Dark)," & which you can find if you click here.

Chuck reviewed several of the films on Letterboxd, click to read what he thought!

Here are his IMDb keyword lists:
The one for pumpkin is here.  The one for jack o'lantern is here.

Chuck also has prepared a list of Halloween + pumpkin films (courtesy of the IMDb) which you can stream for free elsewhere, & that list is here.

Finally, Chuck would like to give a shout out to Game For A Movie Podcast which gave Chuck & this segment a shout-out which they discussed the film Osombie (2012).  If you'd like to watch that film, which does not have any pumpkins in it, darn it, you can here or here.

Thanks Chuck!  Now, Self Help Radio listener, go watch some Halloween pumpkin films & stuff!

Self Help Radio 102621: Halloween 2021 - Pumpkins!

What's more central to Halloween than the venerable pumpkin?  Not ghosts not candy not scares not nothing! Whether you carve them or not, you probably have them in front of your house for the autumn season.  Heck, some of my neighbors even grow them, so we have to stumble around them on dog walks!

For its annual Halloween show this year, Self Help Radio decided to shine a light on - rather than through, from holes carved into its flesh - the pumpkin!  & not just pumpkin songs for Halloween but songs about pumpkins in all its glory - including pumpkins in metaphor & "pumpkin" as an endearment.  Not only are there a plethora of pumpkin ditties, but there are interviews galore, ranging from the incredibly informative to the absolutely ridiculous.

You can listen to the show at both the KBOO website & the Self Help Radio website.  At the show's website, you'll need a username (SHR) & a password (selfhelp).  It's three glorious hours long, & the details are below.  Now get to carving!  Halloween is only a few days away!

Self Help Radio Halloween Pumpkin Show

"Punky Punkin (The Happy Pumpkin)" Rosemary Clooney _Memories Of You_

"The Pumpkin Tells" Wade Denning with Kay Lande _Halloween_

"Ding! Dong! Fill My Plastic Pumpkin" Mike Chick _Ding! Dong! Fill My Plastic Pumpkin_

introduction, definition, & origins

"Punkin Center Tennessee" Lonzo & Oscar _Country Music Time_

"Put The Pumpkin On The Table" David & Jad Fair _Halloween Songs_

"Pumpkin Song" Casper Myers _Karma Shot_

"Pumpkin Carving Party" Evil Streaks _Talk To The Dead_

"Hole In The Pumpkin" Ini Kamoze _Shocking Out_

interview with the star of Evil Pumpkin Man Mike Stout

"Jack O'Lantern" Babe Ruth _Babe Ruth_

"Jack O'Lantern" Supreme Dicks _The Unexamined Life_

"Jack-O'-Lantern Man" The Bravery _Stir The Blood_

"Jack O'Lantern Soccer Ball" The Sharksons _Best Halloween Songs Ever_

"Pumpkin" Male Bonding _Nothing Hurts_

interview with the creator/writer of Evil Pumpkin Man Damian Raven

"Magical Pumpkin Seeds" April Mae & The June Bugs _Boogie Boo! 3_

"Pumpkin Seeds" Devendra Banhart _Oh Me Oh My_

"Pumpkin Seeds" Fred Thomas _Night Times_

"Who Pick De Pumpkin" Zap Pow _Who Pick De Pumpkin_

"African Pumpkin" Pinchers _African Pumpkin_

interview with pumpkin farmer Booster Fromholz

"Pumpkinhead" Christmas _In Excelsior Dayglo_

"Pumpkinhead" Dharma Bums _Bliss_

"Pumpkin Head Xscapes" The Fall _Ed's Babe_

"The Ballad Of Peter Pumpkinhead" XTC _Nonsuch_

"The Great Great Pumpkin" Eddy Bell _Rockin' Rollin' Vocal Groups Vol. 6_

our librarian friend Carole stops by with books about pumpkins!

"Little Peter Punkin Eater" Gene Autry _Always Your Pal, Gene Autry_

"Pumpkin Eater" Terry Jacks _Seasons In The Sun_

"Pumpkineater" Butch Hancock _Eats Away The Night_

"Pumpkin Pie" The "5" Royales _Soul & Swagger: The Complete "5" Royales 1951 - 1967_

"Apples, Peaches, Pumpkin Pie" Odds & Ends _A Treasury Of Northern Soul_

"Pumpkin Pie" Kid Congo & The Pink Monkey Birds _Dracula Boots_

another installed of Chuck's Happily Unsophisticated Cinema Korner featuring pumpkin films

"Pumpkin Eyes" Silver Scooter _The Other Palm Springs_

"Pumpkin Time" The World/Inferno Friendship Society _East Coast Super Sound Punk Of Today!_

"Pumpkin" The Starlight Mints _Drowaton_

"Pumpkin In A Tie" Beloved Binge _Blender Theory_

"Pumpkin Creme" White Mystery _Blood & Venom_

"Rotten Pumpkin" Slothrust _Everyone Else_

conclusion & goodbye

"Punkin'" The April Fools _Punkin'_

"Daddy's Little Pumpkin" John Prine _The Missing Years_

"Pumpkin Rose" Helvetia _Nothing In Rambling_

"Pumpkin" Islands _Taste_

"Pumpkin" Mount Eerie _Sauna_

Whither Pumpkins? (Hint: It's Self Help Radio's 2021 Halloween Show!)

(People in Portland love their Halloween!)

Every year, Self Help Radio celebrates Halloween with a show that tries to focus on some aspect of the holiday, rather than a general assortment of Halloween tunes - not that there's anything incorrect about doing that kind of show!  So far, in the nineteen years of doing the show, we've examined ghosts, vampires, monsters, zombies, witches, werewolves, haunted houses, graveyards, nightmares, hell, mummies, clowns, death, black cats, voodoo, Frankenstein & his monster, & last year we thought about horror films which feature the phrase "Attack Of The..." & had songs about horrible things attacking.

Truly I despaired this year finding a unique theme & even asked on the Self Help Radio Facebook page, where I did get some great suggestions that may turn up on future Halloween shows.  But then, like it sometimes does, inspiration sideswiped me & I thought, what symbol is more important to Halloween than the pumpkin?  There's hardly a house on our block without at least one in the front yard.  & those who for religious reasons might find the holiday of Halloween problematic can still enjoy the pumpkin as the official fruit of the harvest.

So tonight on Self Help Radio we will play lots of songs about pumpkins & we'll talk to lots of folks about pumpkins & it's a Halloween show almost a week before Halloween!

From midnight to 3am! On 90.7 fm KBOO in Portland!  & kboo.fm everywhere!  & don't worry, pumpkins aren't scary!

...Or are they?

Preface To Halloween 2021 - Pumpkins! Featuring Much More Pumpkin Content

Though it appears to have fallen out of favor, Self Help Radio still has a Tumblr account (it's here), & there are lots of Tumblr users who love love love Halloween (like this one) & there's tons of cool Halloween content right now including pumpkin stuff.  Like below!

(Sorry there are no attributions - Tumblr users don't say anything about where the images originated - the horror that is constant reposting.)

Enjoy!

Lotsa Pictures Of Pumpkins # 2

As I mentioned yesterday, I take a lot of pictures of pumpkins around the Halloween time when people have pumpkins out.  They're a very photogenic fruit.  But!  I forgot to mention yesterday the reason why I am doing this is because the Halloween show this year will be about pumpkins!  Please enjoy three pictures below I took of pumpkins when I was living in Texas from 2016-2019.

As an aside, this last one has made me a bit sentimental - it was taken at the Dallas Arboretum on a visit with my mother, who we lost last year.  It makes me a bit sad to know we'll never stroll around that place anymore together - not the least because she loved it quite a bit.

Lotsa Pictures Of Pumpkins # 1

It's true, when they're out, I take lots of pictures of pumpkins.  Here are some from when I lived in Kentucky.

Self Help Radio 101921: Radar

(Original image here.*)

It was almost certainly off your radar this week, but Self Help Radio's show about radars might've been a steady blip in some listening situations from midnight to 3am Tuesday morning.  Despite its subject matter, it didn't locate any enemy aircraft, missiles, submarines, or ships; it didn't indicate any weather systems or changes in environment; it didn't communicate successfully with extraterrestrial life; & it certainly didn't give anyone any speeding tickets.  It just played lots of songs & talked about radar, talked to a couple of guests, featured a disastrous in-studio performance of a pop song, & was generally happy to continue live in the KBOO studios in the middle of the night.

You can listen to the radar show in two places: at the KBOO website & at the Self Help Radio website.  If you use the second link, be prepared to supply a username (SHR) & a password (selfhelp).  You won't need one on the KBOO website.  All the things that happen on the show are noted below.

The things that are on this show's radar are quite ridiculous, yes, we are aware.

Self Help Radio Radar Show

"Radar" Link Wray & The Wraymen _Link Wray & The Wraymen_

"Radar" J.B. Hutto & The New Hawks _Rock With Me Tonight_

"Radar" Gruppo Sportivo _Sombrero Times_

introduction & definitions (feat. the Definition-O-Tron 3000)

"Radar" The Legendary Stardust Cowboy _Rock-It To Stardom_

"Radar" Laurie Anderson _Home Of The Brave_

"Radar" Morphine _Yes_

"Radar" Comet Gain _Tigertown Pictures_

"Radar" Beautiful Assassins _Preamp_

interview with archaeologist Dr. Renate Phelps

"Radar" Catherine Feeny _Hurricane Glass_

"Radar" The Transmissionary Six _Radar_

"Radar" Riz MC _Microscope_

"Radar" Moving Panoramas _One_

"Radar" Teen _Good Fruit_

interview with inventor Giorgio Rasp

"Radar Love" Centerfold _Radar Love_

"Radar Blues" Big Joe Turner _The Swing Time Records Story_

"Radar Blues" Chris Connor _Brain In A Box: The Science Fiction Collection_

"Radar Blues" The Holy Modal Rounders _Indian War Whoop_

"On My Radar" John Tirado _Slow-Motion Party_

a brief history of radar a live performance cover of Britney Spears' "Radar" by Captain McCheese

"Radar" Mr. Bear & His Bearcats _Hot Rods & Custom Classics_

"Radar Gun" The Bottle Rockets _The Brooklyn Side_

"Radar Detector" Darwin Deez _Darwin Deez_

"Funky Radar" The Weathermen _Global 851_

"Music Is My Radar" Blur _The Best Of_

a brief history of radar

"Radar In My Heart" Bill Nelson's Red Noise _Sound On Sound_

"Radar Man" Halmens _Halmens No Kindaitaiso_

"Radar Eyes" Sic Kidz _Teenage Obsessions 1978-84 Recordings_

"The London Radar" Cornershop _Handcream For A Generation_

"Elmer W. Litzinger, Spy: Yukon Radar" Bob & Ray _The Very Best Of Bob & Ray, Vol. 1_

"Radar Follows You" Versus _Two Cents Plus Tax_

idioms with radar

"Underneath The Radar" Underworld _Underneath The Radar_

"Living Under The Radar" Asian Dub Foundation _Punkara_

"Under The Radar" The Vibrators _Under The Radar_

"Under Radar" The Mendoza Line _Lost In Revelry_

"Under The Radar" Nah... _Nah..._

conclusion & goodbye

"Contrapuntal Interstellar Radars" Conrad Schnitzler _Space Box - 1970 & Beyond (Space, Krautrock & Acid Trips)_

"Radar Receiver" Solvent _Apples & Synthesizers_

"Radar" Hauschka _Salon Des Amateurs_

* "Radar" by BenFrantzDale is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0

Whither Radar?

(image from here.)

The normal way for me to think of a theme starts with coincidence.  I notice a particular theme recurs in the music I'm listening to.  My brain says, "That might be fun to do a radio show about."

Next I visit the list of themes I've explored on the Self Help Radio website.  Nine times out of ten I discover I've already covered that theme.  It's surprising what one forgets.  Sometimes I even forget to check if I've done the theme already.

There's another step I've recently added, which is this one: is the theme so general it would take me way too long to sort through all the songs that fit the theme?  It's why I don't do themes like "cars" or "rain" - I would have hundreds of songs to listen to, & I don't have the time for that.  A corollary to this step is the opposite: are there enough songs for the theme?  I recently rejected what would've been a fun theme because I found maybe ten songs that worked for it.  & I just didn't feel I could find many more.

Once I've decided on a theme, I start gathering songs.  When I feel I have a critical mass of songs, I schedule it (put it on the website) & I start thinking about the show.  Oftentimes, like this week, I have enough songs for a decent two-hour show & then I recall, "Oh shit! I have a three-hour show!"  In that case I do as I did yesterday, set aside some time to find other songs that fit the theme that I like.

It's a misconception that I play whatever songs I find for the theme as long as it fits the theme.  You may not like the stuff I play on the show but I only play music I like.  It's the truth!  It's easy to find enough songs to fit any theme if you just play all the songs that fit the theme.  But it's my show.  I'm gonna play the stuff I wanna listen to.

This week those songs are about radar.  & the show will happen tonight (!) from midnight to 3am on 90.7 fm KBOO Portland & online at the same time at kboo.fm.  & yep, I'll be live in the KBOO studios.

You won't need radar to find me tonight, although feel free to use radar all through the show!

Preface To Radar: O'Reilly

(image from IMDb)

It's impossible to say the word "radar" in American culture without invoking two things - & I'll completely understand if this is not the case for millennials or later - one of these is the song "Radar Love" by Golden Earring, & the other is the character of Radar O'Reilly on M*A*S*H.

As a kid, I was inordinately fond of Radar.  You might never guess why.  I didn't possess his seeming telepathic gift to anticipate what someone wanted.  I wasn't very naïve though I was quite shy.  & I really wasn't a sheltered child.  My fondness for animals wouldn't really develop till later, when I was around more of them, though I did envy his menagerie.  None of these reasons were why I liked Radar.  The reason I liked him was kinda dumb: I knew his real name was Gary.

Gary Burghoff portrayed Radar O'Reilly & I knew this because I read credits.  When I was a kid, I was a voracious reader of everything including words on a TV screen & I loved to connect the actor to the name.  & here was someone on television with the same name as me.

& listen, then as now, Gary wasn't a popular name.  I have known only a handful of other Garys in my life.  When I was in elementary school, teachers & other kids were so unfamiliar with the name that I was often called "Greg."  It just made sense that I'd glom onto any other Gary out there.  It really did help that he was such a sweet character.  If other kids had wanted to call me "Radar," I wouldn't have minded.  But I had so few friends, I never even had a nickname.

There's one weird memory I have of the show.  On one touching episode, which must've aired when I was just seven or eight years old, Radar's family in - is it Iowa? - send him a film from home.  The main characters watch it, & Gary Burghoff dons a dress to play his own mother.  A child's mind works in weird ways, & mine was somewhat freaked out by the fact that Radar's mother looked so much like him.  I remember staring at my own mother, who was watching with me, & thinking, "When I get older, will I look like her?"

Yes, there'll be Radar O'Reilly content on the show tomorrow.  As well as "Radar Love."  How could there not be?  Sorry, millennials.

Handsome Chair

This picture was taken on this day five years ago, doubtless in Fort Worth, Texas.  I titled it, "Handsome Chair."

What else do you want from me today?

A Couple Of Books About Eggs

(both images from Goodreads)

On this week's show, our favorite librarian Carole came by to talk about two books about eggs.  You can see the images above.  I will tell you what they are:

Egg: Nature's Perfect Package by Steve Jenkins & Robin Page - this book is full of facts & seems like lots of fun.

What Will Hatch? by Jennifer Ward & Susie Ghahremani - this book is for people much, much younger than I am but made me wish books for old people were as interactive.

Carole is a children's librarian but I'm a bit immature so I'm glad she shares books with us no matter how old the audience is supposed to be.  Check them out!  You may find you like them.

Self Help Radio 101221: Eggs

The photo above, of painted easter eggs, was taken by me earlier this year.  The eggs were actual eggs, uncooked, decorated by a neighbor of ours, & his children, when they were young. They're grown up & have kids - the neighbor's children I mean - so the eggs are decades old.  What was in them - they were store bought, so unfertilized - I'm talking about the eggs now - what was in them just seemed to go away without leaving the eggs spoiled.  Perhaps the paint helped.

This week's Self Help Radio is full of some gaudily painted & hopefully well-preserved eggs - well, songs about eggs, anyway - as well as lots of interviews of an eggish nature.  & mostly free range!  Books & movies about eggs, games featuring eggs, the nutritional value of eggs, & even a theater that came from eggs - the show had guests who discussed these things.

You can listen when you'd like (we really do hope it doesn't spoil) at the KBOO website or at the Self Help Radio website.  If you are using the latter link, make sure you know you need a username (try SHR) & a password (selfhelp).  The show is three hours long, so pace yourself.  Everything that happens is listed below.

& yes, I managed to make it through this whole post without a single egg pun.  You might think that makes me a good egg, but I think after all this egg content, I'm a bit shell-shocked.

Self Help Radio Egg Show

"Eggs" Martin Mull _Martin Mull_

"Egg" The Garden _Haha_

"Eggs & Their Shells" Cocteau Twins _Echoes In A Shallow Bay_

introduction & definitions

"Temptation Of Egg" Giant Sand _Chore Of Enchantment_

"The Little Black Egg" The Nightcrawlers _Nuggets (Original Artyfacts From The First Psychedelic Era 1965-1968)_

"Chicken Or Egg?" Space Ghost _Yeah, Whatever..._

"The Egg Or The Hen" Hot Lips Page _1946-1950_

"Goose Eggs" Joanna Newsom _Divers_

our librarian friend Carole stops by to talk about eggy books

"Ham & Eggs" Skip Manning _Koko-Mojo Diner Volume 3 Southern Menu_

"Ham & Eggs" A Tribe Called Quest _People's Instinctive Travels & The Paths Of Rhythm_

"Green Eggs & Ham" Marvin Miller _Fox In Socks/Green Eggs & Ham_

"Hash & Eggs" The Blackbyrds _City Life_

"Eggs & Sausage (In A Cadillac With Susan Michelson)" Tom Waits _Nighthawks At The Diner_

interview with Self Help Radio nutritionist Professor Food

"Humpty Dumpty" The Beagles _Here Come The Beagles_

"Humpty Dumpty Heart" Hank Thompson _The History Of Country & Western Music_

"The Death Of Humpty Dumpty" George Carlin _When Will Jesus Bring The Pork Chops?_

"Bad Egg" UV Race _Racism_

"Rotten Eggs" Bait Bag _Consider This A Warning_

interview with Nathaniel Marm of the Egg Theater Company

"I'm A Poached Egg (Without Toast)" Ella Fitzgerald _Jukebox Ella: The Complete Verve Singles Volume 1_

"Hard Boiled Eggs" Laurel & Hardy _Legends Of The 20th Century_

"Music To Boil An Egg" The Wibbley Brothers _Go Weird_

"Scrambled Eggs" Ed's Redeeming Qualities _At The Fish & Game Club_

"Egg Cream" Lou Reed _Set The Twilight Reeling_

interview with puzzle & game maker Leonard Burly

"I'm Putting All My Eggs In One Basket (with Johnny Green & His Orchestra)" Fred Astaire _The Essential Fred Astaire_

"Egg Money" Johnny Horton _The Early Years_

"Egg Eatin' Dog" Homer & Jethro _The Old Crusty Minstrels_

"The Goose That Laid The Golden Egg" The Parliaments _Testifyin: The Mid 60's Detroit Sessions_

"The Duck Egg Walk" Milford Perkins _The American Song-Poem Anthology: Do You Know The Difference Between Big Wood & Brush?_

"Eggbert, The Easter Egg" Rosemary Clooney _Easter Bunny Hop_

another installment of Chuck's Happily Unsophisticated Cinema Korner featuring Chuck

"Walk Like An Egg" The Dickies _The Incredible Shrinking Dickies_

"Eggs On Plate" Iggy Pop _Party_

"Sperm Meets Egg, So What?" Heavenly _The Decline & Fall Of Heavenly_

"I Live Inside An Egg" James Pants _Seven Seals_

"Use Me For Your Eggs" The Growlers _Hung At Heart_

"Frozen Egg" Lame Drivers _Chosen Era_

conclusion & goodbye

"Walking On Eggs" The Ground Floor People _Trash Box_

"Walkin' On Eggshells" Courtney Barnett _Tell Me How You Really Feel_

"Eggshell World" RVG _A Quality Of Mercy_

"Egg Song" Loch Lomond _Little Me Will Start A Storm_

"Cook A Farm Fresh Egg" Mo Douglas _Society Women Go Slumming_

Whither Eggs?

In case you didn't know, I do another show, on Freeform Portland, called The Dickenbock Report.  It's very much like Self Help Radio, except there are no interviews, but each show is mostly thematic.  Like last week, the show aired on Bathtub Day, so there were songs about bathtubs & bathing.  I bring this up not to plug another show, but because someone who is aware that I do both shows told me that they preferred the Dickenbock Report to Self Help Radio because "it makes more sense."

It was her way of telling me that she understood why I would play, on the radio, on October 7, which is Bathtub Day, a show about bathtubs.  What she couldn't figure out is why on October 12 I would do a show about eggs.  Is it National Egg Day?  It isn't.  So why?

When I explain that at some point I was listening to some songs & it occurred to me that a show about eggs might be fun (it helped that I knew I could find three hours of music about eggs), she said, "See?  That just doesn't make sense."  Then she added, "Why not tell everyone it's National Egg Day?  No one will ever look it up"

Okay.  I'll give it a shot.  To celebrate National Egg Day*, Self Help Radio presents tonight a show about eggs.  That's midnight to 3am on 90.7fm KBOO Portland & simulcast online at kboo.fm.  Not only will there be plenty of songs of great egg-cellence, but I'll also speak to a lot of eggs-perts about egg-related matters.  If that doesn't yolk you in, I don't know what will!

*I looked it up.  Apparently National Egg Day is actually June 3rd.  Maybe the Dickenbock Report will air on that day next year & I can reuse some of the songs!

Preface To Eggs: The Chicken & The Egg

(Image from here.)

The picture is from this article which suggest there's a controversy about that question, which came first, the chicken or the egg?  I confess being a bit puzzled by that many years ago when I was young.  Thinking I didn't have the knowledge or brain power to suss it out, & hearing dumb arguments mostly, I put it out of my mind & would only hear it in passing or in songs (like this one, which I must've heard while very, very young).

Some time later, I happened to see a documentary or an interview on television with a biologist.  I don't remember who it was, whether he was famous or not, but someone posed the question to him.  His response was dismissive.  He said, "Eggs evolved millions of years before chickens did."

But the most I looked into it, the more I discovered that people wanted me nuance & focus.  This article on science.org.au seems to have put it best for me.  It concludes, "At the end of the day, the question is something of a false dichotomy. Eggs certainly came before chickens, but chicken eggs did not - you can't have one without the other. However, if we absolutely had to pick a side, based on the evolutionary evidence, we're on Team Egg."

Me too!  Not such a silly riddle after all.