Self Help Radio 010516: Hats

(Original picture here.)

Hats!  Hats off!  Hat in hand!  Hat's down!  Wait, that's not a thing.  Hat's down?  Are you thinking "hand's down"?  Like, I won hand's down?  You can't say I won hat's down.  That doesn't make any sense.  What would "hat's down" mean, anyway?  Let's not create new idioms here.  Especially when we have a hard enough time with the ones we know.

Hat's down.  For fuck's sake.

The first Self Help Radio of the new year was about hats.  Hats & divorce.  But mainly hats.  There were so many songs about hats.  (They are listed below.)  The Rev. Dr. Howard Gently talked about the spiritual significance of hats.  The Hat Maven told us of his love of hats.  A couple of creative Texans wrote a song for the show!  & just so many hats.  There was nary a covered head in the house.

Get it?  That was a kind of hat play on the phrase "nary a dry eye in the house"!  Clever, no?  No?  Oh.

The show is the show is at the show's website which is Self Help Radio's website.  Username (SHR) + password (selfhelp) required.  It's in two parts.  I think it's as delightful as can be, under the circumstances.

Don't keep it under your hat!

(part one)

"Hats" People Like Us & Ergo Phizmiz _The Keystone Cut Ups_
"Dream Hat" The 6ths _Wasps' Nests_
"Home Under My Hat" The Five Wings _Doo-Wop Coast To Coast, Vol. 3_

"Mexican Hat Dance" Allan Sherman _My Son The Box_
"Mexican Hat Rock" Dave Appell & The Applejacks _Mexican Hat Rock_
"My Hat's On The Side Of My Head" The Four Blazes _Mary Jo_
"Hats" Eddie Lawrence _Is That What's Bothering You, Bunkie?_
"Leopard Skin Pill-Box Hat" Bob Dylan _Blonde On Blonde_

"Some Questions About Hats" Slapp Happy _Desperate Straights_
"There's A Hat For Every Occasion" Mister Ed _Straight From The Horse's Mouth_
"Hat Song" Kevin Ayers _Rainbow Takeaway_
"Sunbonnet Blue (& A Little Straw Hat)" Billie Holiday _The Quintessential Billie Holiday: Vol. 1, 1933 - 1935_
"Pulling Rabbits Out Of A Hat" Sparks _Pulling Rabbits Out Of A Hat_

"Under Hats" Rahim Quazi & Tania Rivas _Under Hats_
"Raspberry Beret" Butcher The Bar _Dressing Up: ePop Covers_

(part two)

"A New Ten Gallon Hat" Sheriff Tom Owens & His Cowboys _Mercury Nashville Gold: Catalog Sampler Volume III_
"White Hat" Big Harp _White Hat_
"King's Lead Hat" Brian Eno _Before & After Science_

"Catblack (The Wizard's Hat)" Tyrannosaurus Rex _Unicorn_
"She's Bought A Hat Like Princess Marina" The Kinks _Arthur (Or The Decline & Fall Of The British Empire)_
"King Hat" Paul F. Tompkins _Laboring Under Delusions_
"Kookie Hat" Freddie Cannon _Okefenokee_

"Call Of The Wighat" The Cramps _Smell Of Female_
"Hats On Wrong" Birthday Party _Hee Haw_
"(They Must Have Made It With Their) Hats" Chrysanthemums _Little Flecks Of Foam Around Barking_
"No Te Pongas El Sombrero" Juniper Moon _El Resto De Mi Vid_

"Wherever I Lay My Hat (That's My Home)" Marvin Gaye _The Complete Motown Singles, Vol. 9: 1969_
"Cowboy Hat" That Dog _Retreat From The Sun_
"Hats Off To Larry" Me First & The Gimme Gimmes _Shannon_

Whither Hats?

(It's a Kentucky thing.  I think.)

There are a lots of different kinds of hats.  Just look!  I guess it's not hard to believe that human beings have created so many different kinds of hats.  It follows that there must be a lot of songs about hats.

Maybe you'd like to see a list of hat-related world records?  Like, how many hats have been worn at once (61)?  Or the largest group of people wearing jellyfish hats at once (210)?  (Jellyfish hat?)  How about the most hats worn at once in a Prius (25)?  (Some records seem to be reaching a bit.)

While you're at it, why not look at the clickbait list of the world's worst hats?  Does it include the Douchebag Golf Hat?  Oh it most certainly does!

So many hats, so little time.  Time?  Why, it's on from 4-6pm today on 88.1 fm in Lexington, online simultaneously at wrfl dot fm.  The nice thing is that it'll keep your head warm if you listen to the show while wearing a hat.  You might need it.  It's cold out there!

Hats off to Self Help Radio!  No, wait.  Hats on to Self Help Radio!

Preface To Hats: A History Of Hats

There are three hats I remember wearing regularly in my life.

My friend Joe, I think, had what one might call a "Gilligan hat" but which I now know is called a "bucket hat."  It looked like this:

(You can buy it here!

Probably I took it from his house or his room when we were in the twelfth grade.  I was a homely kid with terrible hair that I didn't know what to do with.  I would grow it out, it was thick & brown & curly, until someone told me I needed to get it cut, then I went to a barber that was one step above a Supercuts, who basically just gave me a bowl cut.  The hat was kind of a security blanket for me.  If I could've worn it in school, I would have.  I took it to college with me, & lost it (probably left it somewhere) sometime in my first year.  It was for the best.

At some point, when my hair was so damn long (because, you know, no one was telling me that I had to get it cut), I dreaded washing it.  When I did, it took forever to dry.  When I went through a terrible break-up with a girl, I stole a baseball cap out of her car, which I had the keys to.  Yes, it was very stalker-y, but at least I didn't leave a bloody clump of my hair there or something.  It was this one:

(You can get this one here.

That's not exactly the cap I had - but you get it, a sportsball team cap for the Oakland Raiders.  It was 1992 & the cap was made famous by hip hop folks, I think specifically someone from NWA.  My ex's little brother had given it to her as a joke, because she was the opposite of gangsta.

That cap was worn all through Germany & Belgium when I was there in May 1992.  Mainly because I didn't want to have to wash my hair all the time.  I was probably pretty stinky - but so were the Europeans!  I stopped wearing the hat when I finally cut my hair that summer.  I don't know where it ended up.  & for the record, I only wore it because it belonged to my ex-girlfriend.  I knew nothing about the team & only knew vaguely about its hip hop connections.  Of the three hats I mention here, it was the one that meant the least to me.

The last hat I have worn was what my wife tells me is called a "pageboy hat."

(& you can buy one here!)

Though I don't remember where it came from, my wife remembers that she bought it for me at the thrift store.  I wore it all the time around 2004 or so.  In fact, one of my fellow deejays at KOOP radio hated that hat, always telling me to get rid of it, & perhaps was ultimately responsible for its disappearance.  I'm pretty sure I left it behind at some KOOP meeting or other.

One time, when I had the hat on making a presentation for a small class about the benefits of wikis, one woman asked me if I wore the hat because I was balding.  I was proud to lift it up to reveal more hair than she was expecting.

Though I do wear a couple of hats when it's cold out, because otherwise my ears would freeze, I don't have a regular hat I wear any more.  I don't know why.  Perhaps there hasn't been another hat that has spoken to me like these three did in their day.

So if I tell you I'm wearing a hat during tomorrow's show - I'm lying.  The only thing that'll be on my head will be headphones.  As it should be.

Cradle To Grave (Episode Six)

Sixth episode!  After a week off for Christmas, Cradle To Grave returns for the new year with happy birthdays & sad death days galore.  Boy, there's a lot of work that goes into this show!  I hope someone somewhere is appreciative.

Birthdays celebrated include blues singers Rube Lacy & Edith Johnson, the wry country stylings of Roger Miller paired with the deep funky voice of Charles Miller (no relation), & two bassists from indie rock bands.  Meanwhile, folks who met their doom on January 2 include movie star Dick Powell, rockers Randy California & Steve Connolly, & jazz pianists Eddie Heywood & André Persiany.  All played (well, mostly) in the order the artists were born (first hour) or died (second hour).  I tried something.  I don't know how it went.

The show can be listened to now at Self Help Radio: the website.  If you're just joining us, pay attention to username/password information, which is available on the site's front page.  (It's SHR/selfhelp in case you can't find it.)  The songs I played, in each hour, are listed below.

Please enjoy!

(part one: birthdays)

"Mississippi Jail House Groan" Rube Lacy _The Rise & Fall Of Paramount Records 1928-1932, Vol. 2_
"Good Chib Blues" Edith Johnson _I Can't Be Satisfied, Vol. 2_
"Milt Meets Side" Modern Jazz Quartet _Modern Jazz Quartet_
"Everything Must Change" Arthur Prysock _Best Of Arthur Prysock: The Milestone Years_

"Dang Me" Roger Miller _The Very Best Of Roger Miller_
"Low Rider" War _Why Can't We Be Friends?_
"Come On Rock, Little Girl" Smokey Smothers _Chicago Blues From Federal Records, Vol. 1_
"Somewhere In Sydney" Skyhooks _Straight In A Gay Gay World_
"Gettin' Used To Leavin'" Christine Lavin _Beau Woes & Other Problems Of Modern Life_

"Funk'n' Roll (Dancin' In The 'Funkshine')" Quazar _Funk With A Big Foot_
"Wild-Eyed Dream" Ricky Van Shelton _Wild-Eyed Dream_
"Kennedy" The Wedding Present _Bizarro_
"Mutilated Lips" Ween _The Mollusk_
"Shortyville" Trombone Shorty _Say That to Say This_

(part two: death anniversaries)

"I Only Have Eyes For You" Dick Powell, Ruby Keeler, & Chorus _Lullaby Of Broadway: The Best Of Busby Berkeley At Warner Bros._
"No Longer A Sweetheart Of Mine" Don Reno & Red Smiley _Good Old Country Ballads_
"You Got To Fix It" Speckled Red _Complete Recorded Works 1929-1938_
"Rye Wiskey" Tex Ritter _The History Of Country & Western Music Vol  4 (1931-1934)_
"Avalon" Eroll Garner _At The Piano_

"Bo Bo Ska Diddle Daddle" Wayne Walker _Whistle Bait: 25 Rockabilly Rave-Ups_
"Papa's Lawdy Lawdy Blues" Papa Charlie Jackson _The Remaining Titles (1924-1934)_
"Dizzy Miss Lizzy" Larry Williams _Here's Larry Williams_
"When I Write My Song (vocals, Bob Eberly)" Eddie Heywood _Eddie Heywood (1946-1947)_
"Before Too Long" Paul Kelly & The Coloured Girls _Under The Sun_

"Day Tripper" Randy California _Kapt.Kopter & The (Fabulous) Twirly Birds_
"Runnin' Down To Memphis" Eggs Over Easy _Good 'n' Cheap Rock_
"Boogie Parisien" Mezz Mezzrow _Mezz Mezzrow (1947-1951)_
"We Do The Work" Jon Fromer _We Do The Work_

"She Cried" Jay & The Americans _The Complete United Artists Singles_
"Drum Suite" Moondog _Moondog_

The Gary Files # 15: Gary Sandy

(I found this image here.)

An explanation: Since the name Gary is going extinct, I thought it incumbent upon me to celebrate more notable Garys than myself.  This is the fifteenth of a series!

Gary Sandy is an American actor most famous for his portrayal of Andy Travis on the television show WKRP In Cincinnati.  He was mostly the straight guy for a radio station full of wacky characters - a role I myself have played in my life many times.

When did you first become aware of him?  Duh, WKRP In Cincinnati!

May he have been the most famous Gary you knew as a child?  Maybe!  I loved the show a lot, & of course I had a love of radio from the get-go.  But to see the name "Gary" during the opening credits of the show - & his name was the very first - well, it was fun as a kid.

The show makes you a little nervous now, though, doesn't it?  Yes, because I've had to deejay with only two turntables, & I am very anxious when I watch the show & the deejays - Johnny Fever or Venus Flytrap - are so easygoing while something's playing on the air.  They hardly ever cue up another record after one has been started.  They have no fear about dead air.

Does it impair your enjoyment of the show?  Oh, probably not.  I haven't seen it in a while, & when I do see it, I remember the episode like it was yesterday.  I must've watched some of the those episodes dozens of times.  I think I even tape-recorded - not videotaped, but tape-recorded - some episodes & listened to them over & over.

Do you know him from anything else?  Sadly, no.  But!  He does have a website, & he seems to have stayed very busy acting his entire life.  Good for him!  Good for the name Gary!

Was his name really Gary?  Both his website & Wikipedia say his name is "Gary Sandy."  It sounds like an actor-y name, though.  But I have no reason to doubt him.  Even in the 1970s, the name Gary wasn't terribly cool.

Do you know why he was named Gary?  He was born in 1945, so it was (sigh) probably Gary Cooper.

Self Help Radio 122915: Indiepop A To Z # 49

 (I found all the album covers here at discogs.com.)

The last show of the year is bound to be something of a letdown.  While I don't exactly plan for that - it seems pretty obvious, I think, that themes are presented with almost no sense of why they're happening when they're happening - I am aware that at the end of the year, with a lot of people at home, with family, & not driving around, not forced with finding something on the radio to occupy their time getting home in traffic, that there are going to be less listeners.  Hell, the station itself is deserted - I saw Tyler, the deejay before me, & James, the deejay after me, & no one else yesterday.

So I retreat to a show that's slightly easier to do - I still have to listen to a lot of records, scrunch up my face & ask myself "does this qualify as indiepop?" - around this time of year (& near the end of the spring semester, & at the end of the summer semester).  I very much enjoy doing it, & I wonder where I'll be with the show at the end of my life - maybe the letter S? - but I understand that, one, it's not like most of the other Self Help Radio shows I do, & two, it's going to only appeal to a certain group of people who like this sort of music, or who are curious to hear sounds they may not have heard before.

That being said, hey!  I finished the letter K!  & hey!  I started the letter L!  The show is now at the Self Help Radio website & you can listen to it whenever you please.  There's username/password information on the website if you need it.  The songs I played - in glorious alphabetical order - are listed below.

& that's it for 2015!

(part one)

"Tattva" Kula Shaker _K_
"I Am Always With Him" Kumari _Beikoku-Ongaku # 11_
"I Can't Swim" Miles Kurosky _The Desert Of Shallow Effects_
"A Perfect Life" Kyoko _Viva Mobstar_

"Galaxy High School" L.A. Tool & Die _Fashion For The Evildoer_
"Fix My Wagon" LMNOP _Camera-Sized Life EP_
"In A Blue Balloon" Labrador _Goodbye Susanne_
"We Are Kids" Lacrosse _Bandages For The Heart_
"Like A Summer Rain" The Ladybug Transistor _The Albemarle Sound_

"Giving & Receiving" Lake _Giving & Receiving_
"Shrewsbury Girl" Lake Holiday _Send Off The Summer_
"Faking The Books" Lali Puna _Faking The Books_
"Heartbreak Bombardier" Land Of Ill Earthquakes _Heartbreak Bombardier_
"Good Weather" Gerard Langley & Ian Kearey _The Great Fire Of London_

(part two)

"If It's Not You" Language Of Flowers _Songs About You_
"End Credits" Laptop _Opening Credits_
"All Or Nothing Girl" The Larks _All Or Nothing Girl_
"I'll Beat Myself Up Tonight" Larz _What You've Missed So Far_
"Way Out (Single Version)" The La's _Callin' All_

"Last One Standing" The Last Names _Wilderness_
"Barbecued" Last Party _The Sound Of Leamington Spa, Volume 1_
"This Is Pop" Latimer House _All The Rage_
"Paul McCartney" Laugh _CD86: 48 Tracks From The Birth Of Indie Pop_
"Wouldn't You" The Laughing Apple _Whaam! Bam! Thank You Dan! A Whaam! Records Compilation 1981-1984_

"Sacred Heart" Laurel Music _Labrador 100: A Complete History Of Popular Music_
"Ride" The Lavender Faction _Take Down The Walls_
"What If You" Leaving Mornington Crescent _Corners EP_
"I'm Always Home" Jack Lee _Trophy Life_
"Walk Away Renee" The Left Banke _There's Gonna Be A Storm: The Complete Recordings 1966-1969_

"Red Roses" Lefties _Pop American Style_
"Big Bluff" The Legendary Bang _Big Bluff EP_

Whither Indiepop A To Z # 49?

Yes, this last Self Help Radio of 2015 continues the series that I began way back in Austin many moons ago.  It is based on a list I found on the internet, at a site called twee dot net, but of course I am not content to just follow a list.  I had to add more.  Bands I thought deserved to be on the list.  Bands I felt should be represented because of their influence on indiepop.  Even bands that were kind of proto-indiepop.

This has made the list long, & because I do the shows only three times a year, it makes it easy to add bands that have just appeared on the scene in the intervening years.  Is that a wise way to be doing it? Does it make any damn sense at all?

Probably not.  But I'm committed!  You can listen to me finish the letter K & start the letter L today from 4 to 6pm on 88.1 fm WRFL in Lexington, wrfl dot fm online.  I will archive it tomorrow at the show's website, & in fact you can listen to almost every previous episode of Indiepop A To Z by looking at this list.

The show will be a globespanning experience!  I hope you listen!

Preface To Indiepop A To Z # 49: Reckoning

For the record, the show will finish the letter K tomorrow.  It will start the letter L tomorrow.  It will not finish the letter L tomorrow.

This may seem like coded information directed to a small, perhaps elite group of people who enjoy a small, elite subgenre of independent music.  This is not so.

This is accounting by & for someone who has what some might call an obsessive need to continue a program of musical tabulation that will never be finished, & which interests virtually no one but the person doing the work.

Still, there's bound to be some good tunes.  How could there not be?

Some Thoughts Near The End Of The Year

As the year comes to a close, as one's eyes begin to close, one thinks to one's self (or is it oneself?) (it would sound better as "one's self," but oneself is a perfectly fine adjective & perhaps even preferable) (a matter of opinion, certainly), "My, what a year it has been, & perhaps, since I am already sitting here with a snifter of something & a well-oiled suit, I may spend a moment or thus opining & surmising, with one hand on my stumbling memories, & another in the cookie jar."

For example, one might recall that the year started, as most years do, in early January, & no one had any idea that there might be relocation in the air.  Relocation!  The movement of one life in one place to a not dissimilar life in another, stranger place!  Boxes must be packed, books must be sold, furniture of questionable taste must be placed on the curb for the strange men in the beat-up pick-ups to take when no one is looking!  Relocation has not written on the inches & inches of snow that covered three whole months of this year.  But the word was uttered!  The decision was made!  Then it was unmade!  & yes, then came the rue.  The bitter, bitter rue.

Must one always look back upon the year with rue?  What happened to the nepenthe of youth that served as the antidote for rue?  Must rue accrue as the years pile up behind one?  & why is it so enjoyable to say the word "rue."  One sometimes wishes one had children, about whose mental & social conditions one didn't care, such that one could name them fun words like "rue."  Please, one might say, let me introduce you to my children.  This is Rue.  This is her sister, Woe.  This is Little Ruin, & of course you know our eldest, Scourge.

Ew.  It suddenly appears that one is writing some kind of rip-off of a Neil Gaiman story.  One should quit while one is quite far behind.  In fact, one should forego writing until one can more comfortably employ pronouns in a much more readable manner that that heretofore displayed.

But wait!  One has some pseudo-poetic lines that one has not yet incorporated.  For example, this was written on a scrap of paper stored under a salt & pepper shaker: "Can one truly have thoughts for such a thoughtless year?"  Isn't that a fabulous line?  Isn't that worth having to slog through all the turgid prose thus far exercised in these purple paragraphs?

No?  Well, shoot.  One kind of feels like 2015 was exactly like that.

The Gary Files # 14: Gary Owens

(I found this image here.)

An explanation: Since the name Gary is going extinct, I thought it incumbent upon me to celebrate more notable Garys than myself.  This is the fourteenth of a series!

Gary Owens was an American deejay & voice actor. As the Wikipedia notes, "his polished baritone speaking voice generally offered deadpan recitations of total nonsense, which he frequently demonstrated as the announcer on Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In."

When did you first become aware of him?  On repeats of Laugh-In, probably.  I was too young to have seen it when it first aired.

But but but Space Ghost!  Oh do not get me wrong.  I first heard his voice as Space Ghost, that is most definitely the case.  But I didn't develop my penchant for reading credits until much later.  If you asked me at age eight who voiced Space Ghost, I would have said, "Space Ghost!"

You've never heard any of his actual deejay work?  Alas, I have not.  Honestly, I always thought the funniest thing he did was send up the fakey deejay voice that everyone expects awful deejays to have.  I'm not sure I'd enjoy him using his voice as an actual fm radio deejay.  But what do I know?

He has a record - have you heard it?  Indeed I have.  It's called Put Your Head On My Finger, & it has its moments.  Although the Allmusic Guide review is pretty damning.  But fuck them - I've played him on Self Help Radio!

But - you're not impressed by him?  Do not think that's the case!  I appreciate anyone who's able to survive & thrive in the entertainment industry for as long as Gary Owens did!  In fact, if you read Mark Evanier's appreciation of him, you'll understand he was that thing we all strive to be: very good at what we do.  He was, by any measurement you could imagine, astonishing.

Was his name really Gary?  He was born Gary Bernard Altman in 1934.

So you don't know where the inspiration for the name Gary came from?  I don't.  Maybe a family friend?

Ghosts Of Christmas Shows Past!

(I found this - among many other delightfully odd Christmas photos - here.)

Oh boy!  It's almost Christmas!  Why not compound the drunkenness, family fights, & self-loathing-inspired overeating with an old Very Self Help Radio Christmas?  No one has ever accused them of being "useful" or even "good," but they probably walk the line somewhere between "naughty" & "nice."  Consider it an extremely lame gift to you from your friends at Self Help Radio, & be grateful none of us here were your Secret Santa.  You lucked out.

A Very Self Help Radio Christmas 2015

A Very Self Help Radio Christmas 2014

A Very Self Help Radio Christmas 2013

A Very Self Help Radio Christmas 2012

A Very Self Help Radio Christmas 2011

A Very Self Help Radio Christmas 2009

Happy holidays!!

Self Help Radio 122215: A Very Self Help Radio Christmas 2015

(Original picture here.)

Ho ho ho!

What is there to say?  For almost every year of Self Help Radio, there's been a Christmas show.  (There wasn't one five years ago because I was in Australia which, as you know, celebrates Christmas in July.)  (That's not true.  I was trying to be funny.)  This year was no different.  Two hours of Christmas music including a song performed for the show by local musicians.  Plus!  An interview with an elf (retired) who worked with Santa!  And!  A conversation about Christmas with the Reverend Dr. Howard Gently!  Also!  An interview with a man who claims he invented Christmas!  So much yule!  Maybe too much yule!  Also perhaps an excess of noël!

You can listen now & make every day Christmas at the Self Help Radio website.  Pretend it's a present & unwrap it!  There are two parts, the contents of which are detailed below.  Make sure you pay attention to username/password information on the web page.  It's not me being grinchy!

Happy holidays!

(part one)

"Santa Claus Hides In The Phonograph" Ernest Hare _Voices Of Christmas Past_
"Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" Arthur Treacher _And A Sled... And A Catcher's Mitt... And A Puppy... And A Popgun... And A Big Christmas Album From Merv Griffin & His TV Family_
"Department Store Santa Claus (After Xmas)" Howard Morris _Hipster Christmas_

"I'll Be Home For Christmas" Cassie Ramone _Christmas In Reno_
"Five Pound Box Of Money" Pearl Bailey _Jingle Bells Cha Cha Cha_
"Here Comes Santa Claus" Gentleman Auction House _Christmas In Love_
"Dumbo, The Clown (Who Loved Christmas)" The Residents _Subterranean Modern_
"The Christmas Song (Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire)" Invincible Czars _Ornaments_

"Jingle Bell Rock" Inquiring Mind _Christmas Meltdown!_
"Drummer Boy" The School _12 Days Of Christmas_
"The Snow" The Pink Flamingos _The Snow_
"Holiday On Ice" Celeste _The Colder Insight EP_
"Do You Hear What I Hear?" Mark Kozelek _Sings Christmas Carols_

"Christmas Waltz" Jenny & Lee (from Owlsey County) _Christmas Waltz_
"Hard Candy Christmas" Tracey Thorn _Tinsel & Lights_
"Loneliest Christmas Tree" Lise Miller _Love Is_

(part two)

"Christmas With The Beatles" Judy & The Duets _Christmas With The Beatles_
"White Christmas" Bob & The Dylantones _White Christmas_
"Can't Wait For Christmas" Loose Tapestries _Can't Wait For Christmas_

"Jungle Bells (Dingo-Dongo-Day)" Les Paul & Mary Ford _Christmas Cheer_
"Santa Mouse" Bob Morrison _Santa Mouse_
"The Twelve Days Of Christmas" Bob & Doug McKenzie _Great White North_

"Happy Christmas (War Is Over)" Seattle Tuba Project _Guess Who's Pregnant?_
"I'm Giving You My Cold For Christmas" Lee Rosevere _I'm Giving You My Cold For Christmas_
"Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer" The Winter Wonderband _You Know It's Christmastime_
"Christmas Tears" The Hit Parade _More Pop Songs_

"Christmas Flexi" T.Rex _T.Rexmas!_

Whither A Self Help Radio Christmas 2015?

(I found this image - with helpful safety tips - here.)

My mother, who is German, tells me that, when she was a child, in pre-World War II Germany, they would put candles on the Christmas tree.  Even though I was a child, my first thought was "Holy shit! Wouldn't the tree catch fire & burn the whole fucking house down?!"  & I was very happy that, though the electric lights on our tree got a little warm, they weren't a freakin' open flame.

My wife, who has Polish parents, tells me she heard the same thing from them.  What they told her - & what my mother wouldn't, because the past is pretty rosy in her hindsight twenty-twenty - is that, yes, there were fires on the tree.  All the time.  All the time!  It was a thing that happened, because, you know, they were putting candles on a flammable object.  Of course there were fires!

Having said that, I think I would enjoy watching a Christmas tree burn.  Not in a house, with presents under it - that would be sad!  I'm not a psychopath.  But I can't stop looking at that image up there.  I like fires, I'm human.  One of our neighbors keeps promising to invite us to a bonfire.  I wonder when that's going to happen?

None of this has anything to do with this week's show, with is full of Christmas music both traditional & odd, both reverent & the opposite, but hopefully nice & novel & different than the canned stuff you hear in all the places you go this time of year.  I don't want to do the same sort of Christmas show everyone else does.  But perhaps it's my vanity saying that - I have a sneaking suspicion I'm not all that special, you know.

The show is on here in unseasonably warm Lexington from 4-6pm on 88.1 fm (that's WRFL) & all over the unseasonably warm Christmas world on wrfl dot fm.  I hope you can tune in, but in case you can't, I'll archive it on the show's website in time for Christmas!

Ho ho ho!

Preface To A Very Self Help Radio Christmas 2015: Naughty & Nice

Have you noticed - have you really noticed - that's there a lot of Christmas music out there?  It's ironic that some people think there's a war on this particular holiday, because I believe there's more Christmas music out there than there's porn.

& like porn, most Christmas music is awful.  I mean, most if not all porn is just terrible.  Most - but not all - Christmas music is the very definition of intolerable.  Almost always designed to make a buck.  By hacky musicians or musicians who are struggling for relevance.  Who buys Christmas music?  Or should I ask, who doesn't buy Christmas music?

For me, the challenge is to find songs that aren't tedious copies of the originals, or originals that have some personality, or - this is an epiphany I had last night - music that's disrespectful.

Because I do love Christmas music, despite the fact that I don't celebrate the holiday at all.  The wife & I don't exchange gifts, we don't immerse ourselves in the mythology, heck, I don't even want to be around my family this time of year.  (The wife's family went on a trip, or she'd have flown back home to be with them.)  So I won't be offended if someone is utterly & completely disrespectful of some great Christmas song.

There will be, I confess, a couple of disrespectful Christmas songs on my show tomorrow.  I have found some real goodies.  Some real square tunes too.  But - I can't stress this enough - not any that are as awful as the pornography-level Christmas tunes you'll hear in any store now until the end of the year.  Guaranteed!

Cradle To Grave (Episode Five)

My other radio show, called Cradle To Grave, aired last night, & I forgot to mention it on social media.  My bad!  I get caught up in dumb life.  But I think it was a lot of fun.

One of the treats of doing the show is that I can celebrate musicians that mean a great deal to me, & last night featured the birthday of one of my heroes, Phil Ochs, are well as the death anniversary of one of the top ten greatest blues artists ever, Blind Lemon Jefferson.  But there's much, much more.

The show is now at the Self Help Radio website for you to be listening to at your earliest inconvenience.  I recommend looking at the page for password/username info.  It's right there, it's no secret.  The show is divided in two parts, one for birthdays, the other for sad days of death, & what's in each part is listed below.

Please to enjoy.

(part one: birthdays)

"Stomp Off Let's Go" Erskine Tate's Vendome Orchestra _The History Of Jazz: Chicago That Toddlin' Town_
"Riverside Blues" Lu Watters' Yerba Buena Jazz Band _The Good Time Jazz Story: San Francisco_
"L'Accordeoniste" Edith Piaf _Blue Skies: 45 Hits From The 30s & 40s_

"Sparkling Blue Eyes" Bill Carlisle _From The Vaults: Decca Country Classics 1934-1973_
"Country Boy" Little Jimmy Dickens _The History Of Country & Western Music: 1949_
"Rehearsals For Retirement" Phil Ochs _Rehearsals For Retirement_
"I'd Love To Change The World" Ten Years After _A Space In Time_

"Mardi Gras In New Orleans" Professor Longhair _Gettin' Funky: The Birth Of New Orleans R&B_
"This Here" Bobby Timmons _This Here Is Bobby Timmons_
"Teasin'" Cornell Dupree _Teasin'_
"Mighty Mighty" Earth, Wind & Fire _Open Your Eyes_
"Hurry Hurry" New Birth _Love Potion_
"Best Of Friends" Twennynine with Lenny White _Best Of Friends_

"Side Car Cycle" Charlie Ryan & The Timberline Riders _Side Car Cycle_
"Do You Believe In Magic?" The Lovin' Spoonful _Do You Believe In Magic?_

(part two: death anniversaries)

"I Want To Be Like Jesus In My Heart" Blind Lemon Jefferson _The Rough Guide To Blind Lemon Jefferson_
"Sleepy Time Gal" Gene Austin _Voice Of The Southland_
"On The Road Again" Floyd Jones _The Chronological Floyd Jones: 1948-1953_
"That's All Right" Jimmy Rogers _Blues Greats_
"Gotta Serve Somebody" Pops Staples _Don't Lose This_

"That's My Kind Of Love" Marion Worth _Marion Worth's Greatest Hits_
"Drivin' Nails In My Coffin" Ernest Tubb _Walking The Floor Over You_
"Older Guys" Flying Burrito Brothers _Burrito Deluxe_
"Sittin' Here Drinking" Christine Kittrell _Night Train To Nashville: Music City Rhythm & Blues, 1945-1970_
"Like The Weather" 10,000 Maniacs _In My Tribe_

"Winin'" Art Hodes With Milt Hinton _Just The Two Of Us_
"El Hombre" Pat Martino _El Hombre_
"Wah Wah Man" Young-Holt Unlimited _What It Is! Funky Soul & Rare Grooves (1967-1977)_

The Gary Files # 13: Gary Peacock

(I found this image here.)

An explanation: Since the name Gary is going extinct, I thought it incumbent upon me to celebrate more notable Garys than myself.  This is the thirteenth of a series!

Gary Peacock is an American jazz double bassist. He has performed with a great many people, including but not limited to Keith Jarrett, Albert Ayler, Bill Evans, Bill Frisell, Jan Garbarek, Paul Motian, & more.  Impressive!

When did you first become aware of him?  It was probably in the last twenty years, when I became interested in jazz.

His name stood out, didn't it?  Yeah it did!  Not only was he a Gary, but he was a Peacock!

Is jazz bass something you're interested in?  Not necessarily.  I mean, I am very fond of Albert Ayler's Spiritual Unity, but I listen to it mainly for Ayler on sax, not for the crazy bass & drum combination.  But you know, I understand how important that is.

Do you like any of the Keith Jarrett records he's on?  Of the ones I've heard, probably the Standards recordings of the early 1980s.  But they collaborated a lot!

Do you like any of his work as a leader?  I am ashamed to say I haven't heard a ton of it, but most recently I was listening to the record he made with Bill Frisell in the 1990s, & I dug it.

So there isn't a record out there that's your favorite Gary Peacock recording?  No, but there should be.  He's not just a Gary, he's also a Peacock!

He is 80 years old now.  & bizarrely enough, from Idaho.  This is a marvelous world.

Is his name really Gary?  His name is really Gary Peacock!

It seems a nicer name than Gary Cooper, don't you think?  If anyone can bring back the popularity of the name Gary, it has to be Gary Peacock!

Self Help Radio 121515: Gary's Favorite Releases 2015

Now comes the point when I get around to listening to a record that I got a month ago & it turns out to be my favorite record of the year.  It's always like that!  Damn it all.

Not much to say except, hey, here's some music I liked a lot this year, as well as bits by funny people.  I am going to try to find more time next year to spend with music like I used to.  This may mean my radio work will suffer, but I waste a lot of time giving things a chance that I end up disliking.  That's not good or fun.

The show has some music I like plus! a visit from CNN contributor David Fruchter! plus! an interview with New York Times cultural critic CJ Buchanan! and! an enlightening conversation with my spiritual mentor the Rev. Dr. Howard Gently! wow!

The show!  Oh, yes, the show.  It's now at Self Help Radio website place.  There's a password, etc., but that info is on the page, should you want to listen.  The songs I played are below, divided into parts.

Sorry it's not a "best of."  I just don't do those.

(part one)

"Music" The Lovely Eggs _This Is Our Nowhere_
"Come Down" Wavves x Cloud Nothings _No Life For Me_
"Monkeys" Malcolm Middleton & David Shrigley _Music & Words_

"Johnny Delusional" FFS _FFS_
"Cut Me, Baby" Kelley Stoltz _In Triangle Time_
"9 Years Old" Louis CK _Live At The Comedy Store_
"Bad Year" Evans The Death _Expect Delays_

"Spore" Momus _Turpsycore_
"Looking for Another Town" The Apartments _No Song, No Spell, No Madrigal_
"When You Go" Darren Hanlon _Where Did You Come From?_
"29/31" Garfunkel & Oates _Secretions_

"Quit iPhone" The Fall _Sub-Lingual Tablet_
"Photograph" Pataphysics _My Phone's About To Die_

(part two)

"The Legend Of Chavo Guerrero" The Mountain Goats _Beat The Champ_
"I Could Hear The Telephone (3 Floors Above Me)" The Wave Pictures _Great Big Flamingo Burning Moon_
"Grover Cleveland (feat. Paul F. Tompkins)" Shunt McGuppin _Bad Honky EP_

"Ideal World" Girlpool _Before The World Was Big_
"Trippy" Hinds _Burger_
"Ask A Pastor" Eugene Mirman _I'm Sorry (You're Welcome)_

"Going Out" Dinner _Three EPs, 2012-2014_
"Wintergreen" The Orange Peels _Begin The Begone_
"Separate Bedrooms" Joanna Gruesome _Peanut Butter_
"Go!" Public Service Broadcasting _The Race For Space_

"Lake Song" The Decemberists _What A Terrible World, What A Beautiful World_

Whither Gary's Favorite Music/Releases 2015?

(I found that image over there.)

Every year, at the end of the year, there are lists.  So many damn lists.  They come from people of dubious authority, people in whom we place trust because of familiarity, or assumed esteem, or just the brand name.  None of them - not a one - can really purport to know what's best because that is a matter of opinion.  Always has been, always will.  It's entirely human to want to believe that you're part of a tribe that values excellence, but it's at the cost of excluding, & perhaps demeaning or even demonizing, others that don't share your values.  Year-end best-of lists are just another sad way that humans clump together to trumpet their opinions over others.

Ah, you say, but you're no different, Gary!  You do the same!  I do.  I do.  Sort of.  I don't use the word "best."  I don't think my opinion is better or worse than yours.  I will value & respect your opinion if it's informed, if you know why it is you like the things you like, but I won't dismiss your opinion otherwise.  & I don't care if you don't do the same, because it doesn't bother me that people like things that you like.  When you use the word "best," however, I'm laughing at your hubris.  Just like I laugh at all those year-end best-of lists that'll pollute the web like smog in Beijing now until the end of the year, & beyond.

What I do have that maybe you don't is a radio show in which I can play my favorite stuff, & that's why I am careful not to say that this is "the best music" that came out this year.  One, I didn't listen to everything that came out this year.  It would be impossible, & besides, I have no opinion about many genres, like hip hop, country, opera, etc.  Two, I can't say what's best.  I only know what I like.  & three, even I may not think it's up to same standards of my favorite music ever - I only know this is music I listened to over & over & over this year.  Next year I may forget all about it.  Who knows?

So with that caveat in mind, please tune in today from 4-6pm to hear a sampling of my favorite releases of 2015.  There'll be comedy bits, some oddness, a lot of twee & fey, & some great songs by musicians I've just discovered & others that I hold so dear their music is now part of my DNA.  You can listen on 88.1 fm in Lexington + online at wrfl dot fm.  I hope it'll be fun to listen to.

Oh!  There'll be guests.  Talking about 2016.  & nearly all of them mention Donald Trump!

Preface To Gary's Favorite Releases 2015: Year-End Lists

Wow, it's weird to go over all the music that came out in 2015, & even weirder to think of the amount I managed to listen to.  It was somewhat to the detriment of the stuff I really loved, but I am hungry for good music, which means you have to listen to a whole lot of not-good music to find it.  A whole fucking lot.  Because there are more people making music now than ever before, & the nature of commercial radio/media makes it very hard for the cream to rise to the top.  Indeed, the top has never been more curdled (to beat a metaphor to death); the whole industry is about making money as fast as possible with whatever fad or dinosaur act it can.  It's depressing.  But probably more depressing for artists.

& that's the problem with year-end lists.  They can no more determine what was "best" (as if they ever could) than they can claim to be comprehensive.  I've tried to stopped looking at them, but I admit it's hard to stifle my curiosity - what do the people who think they know better than everyone else think is great?

That's not something I'm going to talk about here.  I think you care about that as much as I do.

If that's so, what do people who care enough to vote for their favorites think?  To answer that is to discover, for me, how out of touch I am with most everyone rating their music.  & to do that, I go to a site called Rate Your Music Dot Com.  I like this site a lot. Regular folks from all over vote on what they like.  It has a couple of flaws - I think it skews young, & I also think the fans of metal are way over-represented on the site - but I find myself in agreement with a lot of their lists (more or less), especially as you travel back in time.

But these days?  Well, here are the top ten releases of 2015 as voted by their users, minus the metal stuff, which, as I've said, is nowhere near actual listener levels:

1. Kendrick Lamar: To Pimp A Butterfly
2. Sufjan Stevens: Carrie & Lowell
3. Joanna Newsom: Divers
4. Kamasi Washington: The Epic
5. Toby "Radiation" Fox: Undertale Soundtrack
6. Lil Ugly Mane: Third Side Of Tape
7. Julia Holter: Have You In My Wilderness
8. Oneohtrix Point Never: Garden Of Delete
9. Chelsea Wolfe: Abyss
10. Elza: A Mulher Do Fim Do Mundo

Two of these (#s 1 & 6) are hip hop, which I enjoy but which I don't actively seek out to listen to.  One of these (#4) is called "spiritual jazz" on the site, & I am not keyed into new jazz at all.  One of them (#5) is video game music, which bores me, & another (#8) is electronica, something I used to spend  more time with but don't anymore.  I can't say I heard that record.  One of them (#10) is samba (!) & is probably an outlier, as it has 302 votes while the Lamar album has over 7,000.

That leaves 2, 3, 4, & 9.  They are "indie" & therefore in my wheelhouse.  & can I say, none of those I found too exciting.  The one I guess I liked most is the Joanna Newsom, which I like mainly because it reminds me of Kate Bush, but it doesn't have the hooks that the best Kate Bush had.  (I much more preferred this year's Joanna Gruesome record, which didn't even make the top thousand on Rate Your Music.)

Just like last year, & I probably talked about this then, there's not a record in the top one hundred that makes my favorite music list.  You have to go to # 169 to get an artist I'll play on my show.

So how does an artist make the cut?  I guess I'll talk about it tomorrow.

Cradle To Grave (Episode Four)

Hey! Didya hear my show last night?  Cradle To Grave?  The December 12th episode?  On WLXL?  You didn't?  No?  I know why!  Because nobody did!

Perhaps it's not well-known, but the show is prerecorded.  There are reasons for this that are too dull to go into, but I make the show on Thursday, I take it to the station on Friday & put it on the station's automation, & it airs on Saturday nights.

Except.  This week, I fucked up.  I did something wrong when I put it on the automation.  It aired last week's show instead.  & I listened helplessly, I couldn't do a thing about it.  I don't know what I did wrong, & I won't find out till next week, when I try, try again.

But!  Here's the show as I made it, as it should've aired, as you could listen to pretending it's still Saturday night all over again.

The show is resting shamefacedly at the Self Help Radio website.  There's a password, pay attention.  The songs I played are below.

Usually I'm apologizing for the radio show.  Now I get to be sorry for not airing it at all!

(part one: birthdays)

"Guess I'll Hang My Tears Out To Dry" Frank Sinatra _Frank Sinatra Sings For Only The Lonely_
"Lyin' Woman" Count Basie & Joe Williams _Just The Blues_
"You're Nobody 'Til Somebody Loves You" Connie Francis _Songs To A Swinging Band_
"Let Me Go Lover" Joan Weber _Your Hit Parade: 1955_
"Anyone Who Had A Heart" Dionne Warwick _The Look Of Love: The Burt Bacharach Collection_

"Keep On Dancing" Brian Poole & The Tremeloes _The Beat Scene_
"Have I The Right?" The Honeycombs _Here Are The Honeycombs_
"Over & Over" The Dave Clark Five _Greatest Hits_
"(We Ain't Got) Nothin' Yet" The Blues Magoos _Nuggets: Original Artyfacts From The First Psychedelic Era, Vol. 2_
"Rocket Reducer No. 62 (Rama Lama Fa Fa Fa)" MC5 _Kick Out The Jams_

"I'm Glad She's Mine" Lonesome Sundown _Authentic Excello R & B_
"Leaving Home" John 'So Blue' Weston & Blues Force _So Doggone Blue_
"Voodoo Woman" Lonnie Liston Smith _Expansions_
"Everything That Touches You" The Association _Birthday_
"Mississippi Mud" Hank Williams III _Hank III_

(part two: death anniversaries)

"Rockin' Chair" Mildred Bailey _The History Of Pop Radio (1930-1932)_
"Oh Me, Oh My, Oh Gosh" Slam Stewart Quintet _Slam Stewart 1945-1946_
"La Parrala" Concha Piquer _Concha Piquer Oro_
"Chanson d'Amour (Song Of Love)" Art & Dotty Todd _Chanson d'Amour_
"One Room Country Shack" Mose Allison _Mose Allison Sings_

"Ya Got Trouble" Van Johnson _The Music Man (Original London Cast)_
"Notoriety Woman" Eddie Burns _Juke Joints, Vol. 4: That's All Right With Me_
"I Love Her" The Koobas _English Freakbeat, Volume 2_
"Getting Nasty" Ike Turner _A Black Man's Soul_
"Louisiana Two Steps" Chenier Clifton _Frenchin' The Blues_

"Smiling Jack" Ronnie Ross _Cleopatra's Needle_
"Music Is The World" Crown Heights Affair _The Best Of Crown Heights Affair: Dreaming A Dream_
"Roll 'Em Pete" Rocket 88 _Rocket 88_
"In The Misty Woods" Jimmie Spheeris _The Dragon Is Dancing_