Friday, June 22, 2018

Self Help Radio 062218: Glitter

(Original glitter image here.)

Crap, this show is gonna get everywhere & you're not going to be able to clean it all up.  You'll be finding little pieces of it in your hair, on your skin, in the carpet, damn it, it's all over the cat.  I'm sorry.  I'm sorry!  I'm sorry!

Can I just say, though, it's totally worth it?  Everyone likes to feel sparkly for a little while & glitter helps you feel that way without MDMA or, you know, fire.  The show features music about glitter, about things that glitter, & about glittering.  It's as well rounded as possible.  Plus!  A new song written for the show by Drug Boyfriend & Holy Worm down in Texas as well as interviews with the owner & CEO of Glitter's Party Superstore, Elliot Kliffnerd, & with the biggest fan of the 2001 Mariah Carey movie Glitter, Mary Curtay.  Plus!  A special exposé (written by someone else but read by me) about the dark side of glitter!  I'm telling you, it's worth it.

Download or listen now at Self Help Radio dot net.  Pay attention to the username & password info on the page.  What's in the show (it's almost two hours long!) is listed below.

Have you tried a cloth?  A vacuum cleaner isn't going to worth.  Maybe a slightly wet cloth, or paper towels?  This shit's everywhere.

"Glitter" Pinkshinyultrablast _Everything Else Matters_
"Glitter & Twang" Tullycraft _Beat Surf Fun_
"Glitter & Gold" The Turtles _It Ain't Me Babe_

introduction & definitions

"Love & Glitter, Hot Days & Muzik" Helen Love _Love & Glitter, Hot Days & Muzik_
"Mark & John (Bring On The Glitter Kids)" The Secret History _Desolation Town_
"Glitter" Eddie Gossling _Fresh Brewed Eddie_
"Glitter Freeze (feat. Mark E. Smith)" Gorillaz _Plastic Beach_
"Glitter Gulch" Elvis Costello _King Of America_

interview with Elliot Kliffnerd of Glitter's

"Different Glitter" The Inquisitions _Different Glitter_
"Mekong Glitter" Insecure Men _Insecure Men_
"Glitter In Their Eyes" Patti Smith _Gung Ho_
"I Saw The Glitter On Your Face" Denim _Back In Denim_
"Glitterships" Sunbutler _Sunbutler_

special report: the dark side of glitter

"Glittering Prize" Simple Minds _New Gold Dream (81-82-83-84)_
"The Glittering Prizes" Television Personalities _They Could Have Been Bigger Than The Beatles_
"Glitter" John Heffron _Good Kid, Bad Adult_
"Glittering Girl" The Who _Sell Out_
"Glittering Dream" The Minders _It's A Bright Guilty World_

interview with Mariah Carey fan Mary Curtay

"Glitter (& Not Gold)" Big Joe _High Explosion: DJ Sounds From 1970-1976_
"All That Glitters" Hi-Life International _Travel & See_
"All That Glitters Ain't Gold" Spinners _Pick Of The Litter_
"Everything That Glitters (Ain't Always Gold)" DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince _And In This Corner..._
"All That Glitters" The Blow Monkeys _If Not Now, When?_

conclusion & goodbyes

"Glitter Parade! (feat. Rahim Quazi)" Drug Boyfriend & Holy Worm _Glitter Parade!_
"Glittery Joe" Bentcousin _Everybody's Got One_
"Glitter & Be Gay (from Candide)" Barbara Cook _Smithsonian Collection Of American Musical Theater, Vol. 4: Shows, Songs, & Stars_

post mortem

Thursday, June 21, 2018

Whither Glitter?

(Image from here but don't be a dick & use that website please.)

An entire show about glitter?  What?  How?  It's true!

Look, I know what you're thinking: Gary's not into arts & crafts.  He's never been to a rave.  & that one time he wore eyeliner it was disastrous.  But this show isn't all about me, you know.  Sometimes it's about what it's about.  & I think that's pretty deep.

As I've doubtless said before, anyone can do a radio show about broad topics, like cars or dogs, but when you've done a theme-based show for as long as I have, you find yourself needing a challenge now & then.  A show about something you just can't imagine people would have written many songs about.  Like cheese fries.  Or the Periodic Table of the Elements.  Or glitter.

& yeah, it's not just going to be about that kind of glitter, the one in the photo above.  No, we'll be exploring the verb "to glitter" as well as its adjectival version "glittering."  & all that glitters, I've discovered, does not make a gold record.  But there are some awesome glitter songs.  You'll see.  Or hear.  You'll hear.

The show will be available tomorrow at noon.  Friday at noon.  That's tomorrow.  At the show's website.  Like usual.

Do not, I repeat, do not send people glitter.  It's mean!

Wednesday, June 20, 2018

Preface To Glitter: Dental Problems

Today I had my tooth prepared for a crown.  It's not a king, it's in bad shape.  The crown is supposed to protect it.  The experience lasted for two hours, mainly because dentists see other patients in a staggered manner to maximize their time & make themselves more $$$$.

The people helping - all of them female - I want to say there were three of them - they were pretty indistinguishable.  I know one of this helped the dentist - she might also have been the one who made the temporary crown - & another one took x-rays & another one actually scanned my mouth.  Like, scanned it to a computer.  I took a picture but I'm too lazy to upload it here.  Also, my teeth are terrible.  I know you'd judge me for that.

Anyway, I told a couple of jokes.  My wife says they're "Dad Jokes."  I prefer to think of them as more Groucho Marxian.  Like, at the end, I told one of the women (the dentist split as soon as he was done), "I don't want to alarm you, but I will not be giving this spa a good review in Yelp."  She then told me she went to an actual spa the past weekend.  She reported that it was nice, but weird.

This wasn't my first dental surgery nor my first crown.  But I never forget how weird it is to:

1) Have people constantly put their hands in your mouth.
2) Have someone stick needles into your gums.
3) Wait for your mouth to un-numb & then just be sore.

But the weirdest thing was, in my alone time - to wait for the gums to numb, to wait for the temporary crown, to wait for the dentist to get back to me - I started thinking about weird sexual practices.  Bear with me.  I was thinking, there are people who get off on pain, right?  & there are people who - even if it's not entirely sexual - I mean, I never made it through that J.G. Ballard book Crash, it made me kinda sick to read - anyway, some people like to be injured & probably like to have surgical procedures done on them, so surely there are people who find a visit to the dentist to be erotic.  Right?

My brain said to me, "Sexual dentistry," & I started giggling.  One of the assistants walked in & asked what was so funny.  I couldn't say.

But I think it would've made a great Marvin Gaye record, or something.

Tuesday, June 19, 2018

Ways To Help

On the Tuesday Morning Blend I spoke today about organizations helping the children & families being separated & detained under this administration's "zero tolerance" policy, & listed some organizations who are trying to help. Here are the ones I mentioned:

The Refugee & Immigrant Center for Education & Legal Services (RAICES)
The Texas Civil Rights Project
The Asylum Seeker Advocacy Project
Pueblo Sin Fronteras

I also mentioned that it may be worth it to reach out to your representatives & let them know how you feel.  If you live in Texas, your senators are:
Ted Cruz & John Cornyn.

If you don't know who your representative is, you can find him or her at this link.

I did not mention this, but noticed it later: a way to contribute to many organizations at once, with links to their websites so you can see what they do, it's
at this link.

Tonight I see the AP has found the places where they're keeping the youngest detainees.  It just keeps getting more & more awful.

So maybe we can help in some way.

Monday, June 18, 2018

Is There A Word...

...for someone who needs their opinion to be accepted in such a way that it's taken as fact?

An English word, I mean, not a German word.  Of course there's a German word for that.

It seems to me this phenomenon is getting worse & worse.  Your reputation will actually lower in someone's estimation if you don't share their opinion.  Indeed, they'll cite other people's opinions - usually by linking to some online opinion piece - as evidence of the unimpeachable nature of their opinion.

Except opinions can't ever be objectively true.  That's the nature of opinion.  At best (I feel like I've said this before, so I probably have) an opinion can be more informed than another, but if you like something, how can I say it's not good?  In the case of art, music, whatever, ratings are a democratic process.  Hell, it's because of the weird sense that people have that the things they like aren't appreciated that we get the term "guilty pleasure."  If you like something, you shouldn't feel guilty for enjoying it.  I for one have reasons why I like all the things I like.

Why am I talking about this today?  Because someone told me that if I didn't like soccer (you know, the World Cup is going on), I didn't like sex.  What the what?

Apparently a common complaint about soccer from people who enjoy other sports is that there's just not enough scoring.  That was the background for the comment.  It was assumed that I didn't like soccer because of low scoring.

When I brought up the fact that it's actually baseball, not soccer, that people use as a sports metaphor for sex (you know, getting to first base, etc.), the person had to concede but said, "They score more in baseball though!"

The point is, why do you need your liking of a sport to be such that anyone who dislikes has to have some issue - not liking sex? - which makes their dislike of it a problem?  I don't pay attention to any sportsball.  Anyone who listens to music as much as I do can't imagine spending three hours watching anyone do any one thing.  (Well, I guess if it's a superhero movie - but, you know, nerds like me don't watch sports as a rule anyway.)

If there's a word for this, I'd love to know it - it's such a crazy thing that humans as a rule desperately need their opinions validated.  It reminds me of a certain podcast host who, every time he has a musician on, he always asks them if they like records or artists he likes.  I guess it's great when someone you admire approves of your taste in music or movies or whatever, but the truth is, it doesn't make your opinion more correct or objectively true.

Like I once tweeted: "You have good taste in music = I like the same music you like."