I think I bought my first fitted suit - which is to say, I had to have some dude measuring things called "inseams," touching me in places reserved for doctors - when I was asked to be the best man at my friend Mike's wedding. I got the impression he was afraid I wouldn't dress up, or, worse, was planning to wear something as a "joke." He was very serious about getting married, as one imagines one should be. I was a little insulted he thought I'd fuck it up, but I never told him so, since it was his wedding day.
The first time I remember ever "dressing up" was for a middle school "party" or gathering for a group called the Beta Club. Holy shit, it still exists. I wasn't sure what the purpose of the dumb club was. Anyway, I didn't care much what I wore in those days, I was blissfully unaware that there were clothes that people wore because of something like status & peer pressure. It helped that I was fat & wouldn't have looked good in whatever was hip - but also, my family was poor, so of course we couldn't have afforded those clothes anyway. I wore a lot of hand-me-downs. In fact, for that party, I was given my brother Ralph's white suit jacket, & I believe I was made fun of for it being a little too big for me, but I don't remember being hurt by the mockery. Perhaps I was used to it?
When I used to be asked to deejay in Austin, I always (or most of the time) wore a suit & tie. No one cared & no one noticed. I always looked a little ridiculous.
The second suit I bought, & was also fitted for, was for my own wedding, & it made my soon-to-be-wide angry, because I spent a little bit of money on it. She was going to wear something not-too-fancy as her wedding dress, but she felt like she had to have something as nice as I was wearing. She needn't have worried - I looked stupid in my moderately-expensive suit, & she would've looked amazing in a tee shirt & shorts.
I wore a suit with a red tie - the whole thing was cobbled together from parts - to my little brother's wedding. I think I was the only one of his four brothers who wore a suit to his wedding. With the bright red tie, I felt like I looked like Rush Limbaugh. For some reason. Maybe I had also shaved?
I once bought, for a friend's wedding, a suit from a catalog. Got it through mail order. Surprisingly, it fit. Sadly, I got really sick before the wedding, & had to excuse myself during the ceremony. I don't think I wore it for longer than a couple of hours.
I have no idea where that suit is now.
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