Switcheroo

(Some weirdo on the Freeform Portland Discord)

On Tuesday morning, I did my last Self Help Radio (for now) on KBOO. I believe I have been doing the show in the midnight to 3am slot for well over two years now - since the Fall of 2020. Since perhaps the middle of 2021 I've been doing it live in the KBOO studios.

The thing is, I never really wanted Self Help Radio to be three hours long. It's not been easy to fill 180 minutes with a particular theme - & I've spoken before about how I dislike "broad" themes - like cars or colors or whatever - I like a little bit of a challenge. But challenging is what it has become.

You might not know this but I've also been doing a two-hour version of the KBOO show on XRAY on Saturdays. It seemed to make sense - streamline the show for a different audience - but I've started to feel like that was cheating. As well I was doing both shows live. It was a tad boring for me.

It's been kind of exhausting as well schlepping up to KBOO on Monday nights. With the prospect of Freeform Portland opening its new studio, I decided on a change. Bear with me.

Self Help Radio is moving back to Freeform Portland. It'll happen (live! at the Freeform Portland studios!) from noon to 2pm on Thursdays. But wait! Don't I already have a show there now?

Yes, & the last episode of The Dickenbock Report aired yesterday. I am moving (as of next week) the Dickenbock Report to Saturday mornings, 5 to 7am, on XRAY. Where my two-hour Self Help Radio redo has been.

What about those three hours on Monday night/Tuesday morning? I don't really want to give them up! So I am doing a new show at this time. Premiering midnight Monday is a general format show I am calling Corporate Standardized Programming. It will be recorded. I'll still live tweet the show but won't be going up there & being extremely exhausted all day Tuesday.

To sum up, Gary's week of radio will, starting Monday, be:
Tuesdays midnight to 3am: Corporate Standardized Programming (on KBOO)

Thursdays noon to 2pm: Self Help Radio (on Freeform Portland)

Saturdays 5 to 7am: The Dickenbock Report (on XRAY)

The XRAY & KBOO shows will be archived at their respective sites, & I'll probably archive all three at the Self Help Radio website.

Yeah, switcheroo implies something sneaky, & this took a while to pull together - the various programming folks at the three stations were all very sweet - but I couldn't think of a better word!

Self Help Radio 032823: Instant Radio Show

As announced this morning, Self Help Radio's "Instant Radio Show" is the last episode of Self Help Radio on KBOO for now. It was a program that should've been a bit more clever - instead, you know, I just played a lot of songs that used the word "instant." I also talked to some folks like I do, I had a segment about idioms, & otherwise filled three hours the best I could.

What happens now with Self Help Radio? It's going to be on a different station next week. I'll talk about that on Friday. For now, be aware you can listen (for one last time!) at kboo.fm or (like usual) at selfhelpradio.net. As usual, the latter needs a username & password (SHR + selfhelp respectively) but at least it can be downloaded. Everything that happened on the show is linked below.

Three hours a week was hard! I can't believe I lasted as long as I did.

Self Help Radio Instant Radio Show

"Instant Man" Ronnie Self _Bop-A-Lena_

"Instant Happy" Don Ho _Instant Happy_

"Instant Night" Beauty Pill _Instant Night_

introduction & definitions

"Instant Replay" Dan Hartman _Step Back & Boogie_

"Long Live Instant Pandemonium" Robert Pollard _Of Course You Are_

"Instant Disassembly" Parquet Courts _Sunbathing Animal_

"Instant Flame" Grape Room _Heart Of Gum_

"Instant Nightmare!" The Dears _Lovers Rock_

interview with Jason Lemon of Instant Karma Unltd.

"Instant Karma!" John Lennon _The John Lennon Collection_

"Instant Party Mixture" The Who _Maximum As & Bs (The Complete Singles)_

"Instant Mashed Potato" Chris Knox _Songs Of You & Me_

"Instant Hit" The Slits _Cut_

"Instant Club Hit (You'll Dance To Anything)" The Dead Milkmen _Death Rides A Pale Cow (The Ultimate Collection)_

interview with Andy Jett of Instant Psychedelics

"Instant Reaction" Clarence Carter _Testifyin'_

"Instant Love" The Main Ingredient _Brotherly Love (The RCA Anthology)_

"In An Instant" System Exclusive _System Exclusive_

"Instant Feeling" Aerial FX _Watching The Dance_

"Instant Weight Loss" Sparks _Angst In My Pants_

interview with Charles The Dragon Tamer

"Instant Tunes" XTC _White Music_

"(Do The) Instant Mash" Joe Jackson _Look Sharp!_

"Instantly Yours" Bill Nelson _Do You Dream In Colour?_

"Of The Instant" Gang Of Four _Songs Of The Free_

"Instant Coffee Baby" The Wave Pictures _Instant Coffee Baby_

idioms!

"Instant Knowledge" The Asteroids _Life On A Asteroid_

"Instant Doppelgängers" Surfer Blood _Snowdonia_

"Past Tense Hopes & Instant Fears On 42nd Street" 39 Clocks _Subnarcotic_

"ACME Instant Dehydrated Boulder Kit" Severed Heads _Goodbye Tonsils_

"Instantaneous Decisions" Sun City Girls _Libyan Dream_

a "big announcement"

"Instant Love" Chance Gordon _Instant Love_

"Instant Love" The Monzas _There Ain't Nothing Like Shaggin' (The Secret History Of Carolina Beach Music)_

"Instant Happiness" The Bare Facts _"No Tease..." (Primi-Teen Pounders • Inept, Outta-Tune Teen Romp From The (w)Rec(k) Room!)_

"Instant Love" Bob Leers _Rock-A-Billy Boys_

"Instant Reaction" The Go _Don't Take Her Away_

conclusion & goodbye

"Side One" Jimmy Nelson _Jimmy Nelson's "Instant Ventriloquism"_

Whither Instant Radio Show?

(image by David Shrigley)

Tonight's theme is "Instant Radio Show." Will I show you a simple way to make a radio show? Nope! Will I play a lot of songs that use the word "instant"? Yep!

C'mon, you know my show is dumb. Always assume the simplest, most literal possible scenario.

It's on tonight midnight to 3am Portland time on 90.7fm & kboo.fm.  If you listen live you'll hear an important announcement late in the show!

Preface To Instant Radio Show: Carnation Instant Breakfast

(image from here)

As a child, I watched a lot of television. We were very poor, & mostly we ate junk food. It made me desire the junk food I saw on television - well, any food I saw on television, really. But the more novel the better. Case in point: Carnation Instant Breakfast.

The Wikipedia tells us, "Carnation-brand Instant Breakfast (Renamed Carnation Breakfast Essentials in 2022)* was introduced in 1964. It is a powdered instant drink that is manufactured with protein, vitamins & minerals & sugar. It is typically prepared with milk, & is available in different flavors, such as chocolate, vanilla, & strawberry. Powdered forms are marketed in individual-serving packets & in cans. Carnation also manufactures prepared bottled instant breakfast drinks in liquid form."

For the life of me, I can't recall if I ever had Carnation Instant Breakfast. But boy when I found out about it, I wanted it. It's just not the sort of thing my mom would buy for us - "You have chocolate milk," she might say, even if I explained it wasn't just chocolate milk.

Was there a commercial for Carnation Instant Breakfast that was showed during Saturday morning cartoons? I don't know. At some point, I stopped seeing the commercials, & I hardly ever thought about Carnation Instant Breakfast again. Until this week, thinking about this show. I wonder if it even still existed. & it does, sort of. It's called something else.

Doesn't Instant Breakfast sound like the name of an early 70s prog band tho?

* Italics mine.

Coming Attactions

Will explain soon.

Runaways In The Movies

(image from the IMDb)

Our friend Chuck - the show's resident cinephile - stopped by the show this week to talk about movies featuring runaways. That was the show's theme - runaways. You didn't listen? What, you had better things to do on a Tuesday morning from midnight to 3am?

Listen if you want at the Self Help Radio website or at the KBOO website - Chuck's segment is the first interview, about a third into the show - & then use these handy supplemental links to enhance your viewing experience!

Here's the IMDb keyword list Chuck used to find the movies.
Here is his Youtube Playlist.
Here's a list of movies you can watch elsewhere for free.
Here is the Letterboxd list as well as Chuck's reviews on Letterboxd.

Remember to follow Chuck on Twitter to find out what films he's watching next!

Self Help Radio 032123: Runaways

(Original image here.*)

Here's this week's show, about runaways, mostly metaphorical. It's pretty difficult to write songs I think about actual runaways. By the way, the most common definition for runaway I can think of - "a young person, especially a teenager, who has run away from home" - is number 5 (!) at dictionary.com. The number one definition is "a person who runs away; fugitive; deserter." Which is the original definition it had when it entered the English language, because of the sense of "running away," which one does from danger (or in a military situation). But in my lifetime, the "teenager" definition seems to predominate. I don't think that they take calls from deserters on the National Runaway Safeline.

Since this is a mostly ridiculous show, we don't get into that heavy stuff (we touch on it a bit) so apologies if some of it comes across as glib. We are just being goofy, we don't really want to be insensitive. Which is kind of the show's mantra, come to think of it.

Listen now at kboo.fm or at selfhelpradio.net. If you choose the show's website, you'll need a username (SHR) & a password (selfhelp). I think the KBOO site just recording 150 minutes of the show, so if you're the sort of weirdo who wants to hear three full hours of this, you'll need to go to the SHR website. Everything that happens on the show is below.

Take care of yourself!

Self Help Radio 230314: Runaways
"Runaway" Gail Ganley _Girls On 45: Volume 4_
"The Runaway" Jud Strunk _Daisy A Day_
"The Runaway" The Blackbyrds _The Blackbyrds_

introduction & definitions

"The Runaway" Danny O'Keefe _American Roulette_
"Runaway" The Passions _Thirty Thousand Feet Over China_
"Runaway" Gary's Gang _Runaway_
"Runaway" The Moodists _Two Fisted Art (1980 -1986)_
"Runaway" Adventures In Stereo _Adventures In Stereo_

our resident cinephile Chuck stops by to talk about films featuring runaways

"Runaway" Lush _Lovelife_
"Runaway" The Frenchmen _Sorry We Ruined Your Party_
"Runaway" Ladytron _Velocifero_
"Runaway" Bad Lieutenant _Never Cry Another Tear_
"Runaway" Yeah Yeah Yeahs _It's Blitz_

interview with Lawrence Roe, who helps runaway teens in Portland

"The Runaway" The Clarks _Restless Days_
"Runaway" The National _High Violet_
"Runaway" Imperial Teen _Feel The Sound_
"Runaway" Milk Music _Cruise Your Illusion_
"Runaway" Varsity _Fine Forever_

interview with Runaways Fan Club president Run Away

"Runaway" Joan Jett & The Blackhearts _Changeup_
"Runaway" April March _In Cinerama_
"Runaway" Beach House _Once Twice Melody_
"Runaway" Marlody _I'm Not Sure At All_
"Runaway Yeah" Eyelids _A Colossal Waste Of Light_

interview with Karl Amsterdam, who helps runaway teens in Kentucky

"I'm A Runaway" Tab Hunter _My Rifle, My Pony, & Me_
"My Runaway Heart" Carol Fran _Bluesoul Belles Vol. 1: The Complete Calla, Port, & Roulette Recordings_
"Runaway Child, Running Wild" The Temptations _Emperors Of Soul_
"He's Just A Runaway" Sister Sledge _All American Girls_
"God Save The Runaways" The Secret History _The World That Never Was_

a discussion of resources for runaways

"Billy Is A Runaway" Iggy Pop _New Values_
"Runaway Boys" Stray Cats _Runaway Boys_
"Runaway Blues" Randy Kaplan _Mr. Diddie Wah Diddie_
"Some Dumb Runaway" Kristin Hersh _Wyatt At The Coyote Palace_
"Runaway Strays" Spud Cannon _Squeeze_

conclusion & goodbye

"Runaway Jane" The Natvral _Tethers_
"Runaway Dog" Retirement Party _Runaway Dog_

* image licensed under CC0 1.0 Universal (CC0 1.0) Public Domain Dedication

Whither Runaways?

(image from here)

Here's the thing: runaways as a theme is pretty heavy. Running away is a hard decision for anyone to make, especially those who are young & have had traumatic experiences. In general, this is a light-hearted radio show & most of the songs about "running away" have nothing to do with those kinds of runaways. In fact, when I started collecting songs about running away - usually using the noun form "runaway" - I didn't even think about people who are running away from terrible experiences into possibly worse situations. The songs will mostly not be about that.

So please take this theme with a grain of salt. Not that you treat this show very seriously if you think of it at all, which almost nobody does. Still, I feel the need to issue a caveat. In case I offend, in case anyone thinks I am really putting out truthful information, in the very unlikely case anyone takes my dumb radio show seriously. Please don't!

In fact, you're encouraged to run away from it. Here's where you shouldn't be: tonight, from midnight to 3am Portland time, on 90.7fm in town, kboo.fm everywhere.

& that's all I have to say about that.

Preface To Runaways: It Is Happening

(image from Gurgle Merps)

Way back in 2021, when a lonesome Goodle Meeps car, armed only with a camera & a case of Red Bull, drove down Stark Street in SE Portland, it captured this little apartment building which featured a cafe & a photography studio on the first floor.  That photography studio would soon end its time in Portland, moving (according to its website) to West Linn, wherever that is. But it would be an opportunity for the little radio station that could, Freeform Portland, who moved in to that space in the fall of last year.

After spending its first years in what was basically a walk-in closet in the Baker Building up north (okay, it was two rooms & a hallway), it is absolutely amazing to have the space that - oh, well, you can't see - it's just the facade. I will have to take more pictures. Anyway.

Tonight! A Freeform Portland deejay will do his show live from the studio! Which means what exactly? It means we're coming to the end of recording-shows-from-home - the Dickenbock Report will be (I hope) live!!! this week.

Tonight, late-ish (the show is on from ten to midnight), I'll visit. If I don't report back about it, there is still work to be done. But I am strangely hopeful. It seems like it is happening!

Forgetting To Ask Persimmons

Last week I put on a three-piece suit (my very first) & officiated my first wedding. I have asked - it was incredibly flattering - by my friend Jason, whom I know from KNON in Dallas. I kept it tolerably short & sweet, I think, & keep meaning to ask them if I can reprint my service (or whatever you call it - I referred to it in conversation as a "eulogy") here on the blog. But I haven't asked yet.

Let this be a placeholder or something. It's not that I'm terribly busy, I just have a motivation problem.

Yet I Am All Blue Skies & Wisp

There must be howsoever the utter lack of discipline which lives nestled contently inside of laziness & indolence but nevertheless some exhaustions & lament.

For though one may fly thirty thousand or so feet from here to there & feel the righteousness of neglect under the shadow of vacation no fires have been smothered.

Indeed those hitherto under control might still rebel or surreptitiously thrive which is heretofore & evermore consider a failure & potential emergency.

What & what does one do in the face of entropy & ennui? One cannot sing with a mouth filled with snacks! One cannot soar within the confines of closed & shut.

Declare this not a warped ghazal, purpled poetic prose, overstuffed ripostes! Let instead the pretend pretentiousness settle unevenly like ash on parked automobiles.

Even ever, never naught, doubly singular & terrifically bland. The illusion of progress is like a dream of creation; one wakes feeling accomplishment easily disabused.

Self Help Radio 031423: Adoration

(original image here*)

Please be aware that I know that the word "adoration" is used mainly in a religious context. I talk about that on the show! It's just easier to say one word than the several that the show explores, all variations of the word "adore," from adoration to adorable. You can see that in the playlist below.

Also be aware I was very, very tired doing the show. I had awoken in Dallas, Texas, at some too-early hour because I am anxious about travel. I spent nearly four hours on a plane in the middle of the day gettin back to Portland, Oregon. I took some time to gather lots of songs & think about what order I should play them in but really by eleven o'clock I was running on fumes. One listener said he bet that I would have fallen asleep on the air by the third hour.

But I did not. There was a show. I played lots of tunes. I talked a bit too much. Just thinking about it now is making me very sleepy. So let me just say you can listen to the show now both at the KBOO website or at the Self Help Radio website, where you'll need to use the username SHR & the password selfhelp to listen. But at least you can download the file! All the songs I played are below.

Have I caught up on my sleep? Ha ha ha ha ha ha no.

Self Help Radio Adoration Show
"Adoracion" Eddie Palmieri _Gold 1973/1976_
"Adoration" Cranes _EP Collection Volumes 1 & 2_
"Adoration" Momus _Hypnoprism_

"Adoration Of The City" Robyn Hitchcock _A Star For Bram_
"Peace, Love, Respect, & Adoration" Stimulator Jones _Round Spiritual Ring_
"Adorations" Killing Joke _Brighter Than A Thousand Suns_
"Perpetual Adoration" The Bathers _Unusual Places To Die_
"Adore" WinterKids _Memoirs_

"Adore" A Cuckoo _Destination Unknown_
"Adore" Wild Nothing _Life Of Pause_
"Adore" Westkust _Westkust_
"Adore" Savages _Adore Life_
"Adore" Prince _Sign "O" The Times_

"'A' You're Adorable (The Alphabet Song)" Gordon MacRae & Jo Stafford _Small Fry: Capitol Sings Kids' Songs For Grown Ups_
"My Adorable One" James Carr _You Got My Mind Messed Up Soul_
"Adorable" Acid House Kings _Pop, Look, & Listen!_
"Adorable Combustible" The No-No's _Tinnitus_
"Adorable Racism" Patton Oswalt _Tragedy Plus Comedy Equals Time_

"I Simply Adore You" "Fats" Waller, His Rhythm, & His Orchestra _Fats Waller 1937-1938_
"I Do Adore Her" Harry Belafonte _Calypso_
"You're The One (That I Adore)" Bobby Bland _Turn On Your Love Light (The Duke Recordings Vol. 2)_
"I Adore You" Patti Page _The Complete Columbia Singles 1962-1970_
"Let Me Adore You" Soko _Feel Feelings_

"I Wanna Be Adored" The Stone Roses _The Stone Roses_
"Adored" Secret Shine _Elemental EP_
"Adored" The Bravery _Stir The Blood_
"Would You Die To Be Adored" Prince Rama _X-Treme Now_
"Born To Be Adored" Momus _The Little Red Songbook_

"My Eyes Adored You" Betty Padgett _Trojan Lovers Rock Box Set_
"My Friends Adore You" Creeper Lagoon _Watering Ghost Garden_
"You'll Still Adore Me" The Belle Curves _Watershed_
"Adore You" Sachal Vasandani & Romain Collin _Midnight Shelter_
"Heaven Adores You" Earlimart _Treble & Tremble_

"I Adore Him" The Angels _Growin' Up Too Fast: The Girl Group Anthology_
"The Only Girl I Adore" The Byrds _The Preflyte Sessions_
"Adorable You" Stars On Mars _"Poster"_
"Adorable" Barrence Whitfield & The Savages _Soul Flowers Of Titan_
"All That I Adore" Eternal Summers _Every Day It Feels Like I'm Dying..._

* A note about the image manipulated above: "I Wanna Be Adored | Stone Roses" is by Some Driftwood. Used with permission under the Public Domain Dedication license.

Whither Adoration?

(image from here*)

Okay, I'm back from Dallas. I have a couple of hours to put a show together. I have tentatively decided the show will be variations on the verb "adore" - its noun form, adoration; its adjective form, adorable; I guess even its participle form, adoring. Should be easy to find enough. I have a lot. No biggie.

But there's no time for the other fun stuff, the interviews with pretend experts, my stupid bits, whatever the hell else I do when I spend too much time on these shows. I might not even have an idea of how the show should be put together. I'm very tired - I began the day two thousand miles away & was at thirty thousand feet for at least two hours.

It's a general rule not to expect much with Self Help Radio - it's even more of a caveat today.

Midnight to 3am Portland time. 90.7fm in town, kboo.fm everywhere.

Thesaurus dot com says one antonym of "adorable" is "despicable." Let's plan for that.

*Photo by icon0com from PxHere.

Preface To Whatever The Hell Show I'm Doing Tomorrow: What I Said

(image from here)

Yeah, I'm getting home tomorrow in the late afternoon, so I don't know if I'll be putting on a radio show based on a theme. I had planned on a program playing songs related the word "adore" - that word, adoring, adorable, adoration - but I confess I haven't listen to anything this weekend so maybe I'll just play random songs. Maybe take requests. Maybe just fall asleep on the air.

Maybe I won't even make it back! Who the hell knows. Not me.

The Marryin' Kind

This awkward photo is what I did today - I officiated the wedding of my friends Alyssa & Jason. It was fun. I don't know how I did, but I'll ask if I can reproduce my first draft of the service. Meanwhile I am very tired & new to get some damn sleep.

Dallas (Again)

Picture taken from westbound I-30. Tonight. On the way home from Kalachandji's.

Yes, I'm back in the Dallas metroplex for the first time since May of 2021 (when I gave the eulogy at my mother's memorial), but this time for a more happy occasion - friends from KNON have asked me to officiate their wedding WHAT? it's true.

Now I just gotta figure out what to say IT'S TOMORROW AFTERNOON?

Oh I am so fucked right now.

Self Help Radio 030723: Lifetimes

We only get one lifetime each but there are two slightly different versions of this week's episode of Self Help Radio (not counting the XRAY version that will happen later this week!). There's the episode that aired last night on KBOO - I had technical difficulties for the first few minutes of the show, probably as a result of me pushing the wrong button - you can hear that at the KBOO website. I edited that embarrassing stuff out when I put the show on the Self Help Radio website. (You'll need a username, SHR, & a password, selfhelp, to listen to the sanitized version.)

Does this mean Self Help Radio has two lifetimes? Or is it like our brains often change our memories so we don't come across as the fool in our life story? & what if that is another kind of lifetime? Alas, none of those questions are answered on the show. It's really just the usual nonsense & lots of songs.

Also money beggin' - it's KBOO's Winter Membership Drive. Help us out if you can!

Meanwhile - the stuff that happens on the show is below. Thanks for listening & existing during my lifetime.

Self Help Radio Lifetime Show
"Dream Of A Lifetime" The Flamingos _The Complete Chess Masters_
"Once In A Lifetime" Bobby Darin _Vegas Baby!_
"Guarantee (For A Lifetime)" Mary Wells _Vintage Stock_

introduction & definitions - featuring the Definition-O-Tron 3000

"Once In A Lifetime" Talking Heads _Remain In Light_
"In My Lifetime" The Flying Lizards _Fourth Wall_
"Alive (For Once In My Lifetime)" The Psychedelic Furs _Beautiful Chaos: Greatest Hits Live_
"Just Once In A Lifetime" Brenda & The Tabulations _Dry Your Eyes_
"Lifetime Man" Oma Heard _The Complete Motown Singles | Vol. 4: 1964_

interview with Chad Brothers, who has lived several lifetimes

"It Took A Lifetime" Cult Of Youth _Love Will Prevail_
"Lifetime At The Sink" The Adventure Babies _Camper Van EP_
"How Many Lifetimes" Alan Vega _New Raceion_
"I.O.U. (A Lifetime Of Love)" The Fashions _The Northern Soul Story 11 (The Girl Groups)_
"In My Own Lifetime" Sammy Davis Jr. _Portrait Of Sammy Davis, Jr._

behind the scenes of a Lifetime Cable Network pitch meeting # 1

"Once In A Lifetime" The Bad Shepherds _Yan, Tyan, Tethera, Methera!_
"Hope Of A Lifetime" The Milk Carton Kids _The Ash & Clay_
"Lifetime Of Shame" Jimmie Heap & The Melody Masters _Release Me_
"Lifetime" Nicole Saboune _Miman_
"Each Day Is A Lifetime" David Ruffin _"David" Unreleased LP & More_

behind the scenes of a Lifetime Cable Network pitch meeting # 2

"Once In A Lifetime Thing" Gladys Knight & The Pips _Presenting Gladys Knight & The Pips_
"A Lifetime" Brothers Of Soul _I Guess That Don't Make Me A Loser_
"Lifetime Problems" Dicks _1980-1986_
"Chance Of A Lifetime" Material Issue _International Pop Overthrow_
"A Different Lifetime" Spearmint _A Different Lifetime_

behind the scenes of a Lifetime Cable Network pitch meeting # 3

"Once In A Lifetime" Wasis Diop _Toxu_
"Another Day, Another Lifetime" The David _Another Day, Another Lifetime_
"Lifetime Day" Eternity's Children _Eternity's Children_
"In A Lifetime" The Temptations _Emperors Of Soul_
"In Our Lifetime" Marvin Gaye _In Our Lifetime_

Gary reads from his memoir "A Lifetime In Radio"
A surprise call from 'This Is Your Lifetime'!

"Lifetime Achievement Award" Big Dipper _Supercluster: The Big Dipper_
"Death Of A Lifetime" Ferns _On Botany_
"Lifetime Experience" The Smoking Trees _The Archer & The Bull_
"Once In A Lifetime" Wolfsheim _Spectators_
"One Lifetime Away" Paul Haig _The Warp Of Pure Fun_

conclusion & goodbye

"Once In A Lifetime" Angelique Kidjo _Remain In Light_
"Once In A Lifetime Of Lies" Louis Philippe & The Night Mail _Thunderclouds_
"Lifetime" Bob Mould _Life & Times_

Whither Lifetimes?

(Image from Britannica.com)

Okay, look, I know that the image above is about animals' life spans. But the span of a life is a lifetime, isn't it? No, I won't have any songs about life spans. You're missing the point. A lifetime is kind of a hard thing to capture in a single graphic, but a life span is easily grasped. Your lifetime may fit perfectly into what your expected life span is - but it can be longer! I don't want to argue this with you. I'm allowed to use an image showing life spans before I talk about a radio about lifetimes.

Holy smokes. I can't believe I'm getting to do the lifetime show! Also, it's not a Lifetime show, meaning the cable television network. While I think Self Help Radio would make a great Lifetime movie, I don't think I skew towards their demographic. Anyway, I didn't get to do this show last week, so I'm doing it tonight. It seems a lifetime since I planned. It'll probably feel even moreso after it's done.

When is it happening? Why at the show's regular time, midnight to 3am on 90.7fm KBOO in Portland, kboo.fm everywhere. Will it be the culmination of what may seem a lifetime in radio? Oh no. Wow, no. Not at all. No.

Preface To Lifetimes (Again): An Appropriate Tweet

Today I share with you a tweet from 2018 which is an amazing response to one of those tweeters who ask questions that people want to answer.  If you can't read the image, the question is "What's been discontinued or canceled in your lifetime that you wish would make a comeback?"

The answer is, "60% of animal life on Earth."

The tweeter is still active on Twitter, or the ruins of Twitter as it's now called, & you can follow the account @botandy. If you're so inclined.

Oh, & I should add that I never respond to questioning tweets like that even if I can think of something clever to say because I don't think anyone really wants my opinion. & it's weird throwing shit like that out into the digital void. But I guess a respondent can say, "Hey - he asked!"

Bluto

My deepest apologies for not constantly sharing pictures of our new kitten Bluto. This picture is two weeks old, he has grown since then. He is astonishingly sweet, he is unbelievably adorable, & I can't believe I'm not doing more to promote his general awesomeness.

But come on over, he'd be glad to meet you.