Whither SXSW 2007?

Welcome to the 100th post of my Self Help Radio blog! It's such a special occasion I've made this entire entry out of cheese.

This week's show is my recommendations for bands that are playing "South By Southwest." I am playing bands I like. If you choose to go to see them, fine. Just don't mention me. Bands don't like that I like them. I'm not "cool" enough for them. My "ego" is not "strong" enough to take their "abuse." So let's let the fact that I like them & they'll be in town just be our little secret.

In fact, I won't really be involved in the music side of "South By Southwest" at all. I'll instead be involved in the custodial side. You guessed it - I was able to pay the outrageous ten dollar fee to get an official "South By Southwest" dustpan & broom. It's sad, they strap them to your wrist & you can't take them off until after the festival. I'm so excited by this - every morning around five am I get to go out & clean up after partyers & bands!

"South By Southwest Custodial" is a big step forward for me, & I like the way they sell it. Did you see the bullet points on the brochure? Here are highlights:

* Clean up after the famous & not-very-famous alike!
* Get lots of exercise in a stale-beer-smelling environment!
* Find out secrets of the famous & not-so-famous - like whether they can hold their liquor & what they had for dinner - by hosing vomit off of bar floors!
* All guitar picks, jewelry, money & drugs you find you get to keep! Teeth & limbs must be returned to their owners.

So you & I may not cross paths during the festival, but every time you spill a beer - every time you crush a cigarette under your shoe - every time you take a leak backstage - think of me.

Hey! Here's a "Song Of The Day". It's by DJ Yoda, a turntablist whose work I enjoy & from whose mix tapes I've stolen samples, from his record last year called The Amazing Adventures Of DJ Yoda, which was good but not great. Here's a track, featuring the Jungle Brothers. It's called Playin' Around & you should click on it & celebrate this blog's 100th post. It'll remain here till March 21, 2007, at which point I'll have finished this blog's 200th post. (Wait. What?)

Hooray! 100 posts! Someone get me a cheese shredder & we can eat!