Saturday, July 30, 2011

Preface To Half A Show: A Story About Drugs & Drool

The boy was going to try salvia for the first time. Specifically, Salvia divinorum, often called "diviner's sage." He had never tried any hallucinogenic drugs before, not human made nor natural, & since salvia was legal (for the time being) in his state, it seemed a good idea to start (if starting is what he was doing) with it.

The boy's girlfriend was a little dyslexic, so when he texted her that he was going to try salvia, she naturally read it as "saliva" & began to worry about him. She thought perhaps he might be developing some kind of fetish, something both her mother & that psychiatrist on television had warned her about. She wondered if there were a fetish in which people liked to be drooled or spat upon.

Of course there was! So she told him she'd leave him if he tried saliva. He tried to explain to her that he was talking about a psychoactive plant, but all she could imagine, from reading up on spitting on the internet, is either him getting her (or, worse yet, another girl!) to spit on him, to suck all the saliva out of his mouth, or (she shuddered) him wanting to spit or drool on her!

They broke up; she had begun to find him quite horrible to think about. Then the salvia he purchased from a friend turned out to be the wrong kind, so he didn't get to have a first great drug experience after all.

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