Monday, December 06, 2010

Ain't That A Kilt In The Head?

Today's blog entry, despite its title, has nothing to do with Scotland or the Scottish. Whom you shouldn't call "Scotch" because, as Wikipedia points out, it is "a largely obsolescent adjective meaning having to do with Scotland & usually now considered pejorative unless related to food or drink." Obsolescent? Pejorative?

Unless, one supposes, one uses the phrase Scotch-Irish, which, it turns out, is a pretty specific description of a group of immigrants & not, as some might have been taught in high school in the 1980s, "a lot of the white people who came to America in the 1800s."

Strangely, the disclaimer at the beginning of today's blog entry has actually gainsaid itself, since the disclaimer, by being two paragraphs long, is at some level about Scotland &/or the Scottish. The same holds true with this sentence, which expresses its own paragraph-length surprise at the irony of it all while continuing to refer to Scotland &/or the Scottish.

It has been a custom of the Self Help Radio blog to have nonsensical titles in the same manner that the blog's author has entitled emails to friends or girls with whom he wanted to be more than friends. Even the occasional work email has had a non sequitur or random word or phrase or even an obscure song lyric as a title, although that proved to be counterproductive. Below are some actual email "subject lines" from 1998 which the author of this blog used as titles of emails sent to a girl who almost but not quite became more than a friend & then, suddenly, ceased even being a friend:

Hamlet, pow! pow!
futnucker
Discursive Melancholia
swimmingly
slushily
sinfully
The Surreal Blonde
Lose E Anna
pools in eyes
purloined
Up-to-the-minute minuet

Two of those are references to song titles, one is a spoonerism for a possibly made-up obscenity, & four (or more) are puns. None of them refer in any way to the contents of the emails. Which, it must be noted, had nothing to do with Scotland &/or the Scottish.

One thing has changed from those girl-chasing, goofy-email-subject-lining days (besides the obvious - the author of those emails & this blog is now married & is not allowed to chase girls, whether in real life or on the internets, under full penalty of Wife's Law), which is that sometimes the author of this blog will think of a title first & then write a blog entry about the title. This is very much how Stephen King writes his encyclopedias. As has been continually pointed out to a ridiculous degree, this is not the case with this blog entry.

No, this blog entry is simply here to announce that tomorrow morning will be Self Help Radio's penultimate show of the year. The author of this blog (who is also the programmer of the show) & his aforementioned wife will be visiting the antipodes for the last two weeks of 2010, which means, alas, & it is sad to tell you this, there will be no A Very Self Help Radio Christmas this year. It could not be helped. A vacation was desperately needed & it's summer down under.

Tomorrow's show is entitled "Gary's Favorite Electronica 2010." For reasons explained elsewhere, it is not a "best of." The programmer of the show ("Gary") is nowhere near qualified to make such a preposterous claim about his taste. Instead, it's the music he's most enjoyed in the electronic vein during the year.

It airs, as it has all these last few months, too early in the morning tomorrow on 88.1 fm WRFL, but will be archived as soon as possible later in the day at the Self Help Radio website. Further reminders will be available on this blog as well as on the show's Facebook page. The show no longer has a myspace page & of course no one misses it or has even noted its passing.

Very well then. Please listen when you can. That would be most disarming.

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