Bojingles' Story

Technically, this is isn't the story of the little dog up there; it's the story of how we met.  I know very little about him.  He was in my life for maybe twenty-four hours.

We - my wife, my dogs, & myself - met him on a walk.  He approached us, he was a bit yappy but unafraid, & he didn't have a human anywhere near him.  Nor did he have a tag.  He was impossibly small - he couldn't have weighed five pounds.  & he was pretty filthy.

He walked with us for a while, but when it seemed like he was going another direction, I scooped him up & I carried him home.  He was immediately docile.  He seemed like a dog who was used to being carried.  I got him home & we had to find a way to seal the space under the gates to our backyard - our dogs are too big to escape under them, but this little fellow had no such problem.  My wife nicknamed him "Harry" - after Houdini - when I had to go out to find him once he left.  The name didn't take - he didn't respond to it - because it wasn't his name.

He wasn't hungry, but he was a little thirsty, mainly because he marked everything as he went along.  If I had to guess his age, I'd say maybe a year - I'm no expert - but he was unneutered, which may have accounted for the relentless lifting of the leg.  I immediately took a picture of him - that was the one from the previous post - & I posted it to Next Door & to Facebook via Paw Boost.  Paw Boost was extremely popular - my post was shared over three hundred times.

But we heard from no one who knew him that night.  My wife gave him a bath, & we left him in the garage.  I almost slept out there with him.  I fell in love with him on our walk home.  He ate a little, but when I would sit next to him, he would immediately come into my lap like in the picture above.  It's what, I'm sure, he was bred to do.  I felt awful making him sleep alone that night.

The next morning we found a leash for him & walked him to a nearby vet to check for a microchip.  He had none.  My wife wanted to take him immediately to the Humane Society because she knew the longer he was with us, the harder it would be for us to let him go.  He wasn't terrible on a leash, & my dogs didn't seem to mind him, & he did enjoy the walk.  He ate so little, he was so little.

A neighborhood person who volunteers with a rescue group contacted me & told me she'd keep him the next night if no one came forward.  I thought that was a good idea.  We decided to take him for one more walk in the afternoon to near where we found him so we could see if someone had put flyers up.  But just as we were leaving, I got an email.  It was entitled, "Party yorkie - the little black and white dog found on Raymond."  The body read:

Hi,

I'm a friend of the dogs mom. The puppies name is Bo Jingles. What does she need to do to get him back? Who does she need to get a hold of?

James

Immediately he got my phone number & we soon were texting.  I spoke with his mother, who didn't have a phone herself.  She did not live far - although Bojingles - I spell it that way, I am not certain of the proper spelling - had made it about six blocks to the east of that home - it was quite a distance for such a little fellow.

The story gets a little sad here.  His mother is living in what appears to be a halfway house in our neighborhood.  It might just be a rooming house, but other people have confidently told us it's a halfway house.  We've walked by it many times, & there are often people in front smoking, some with dogs, to whom we say hi as we pass.  The dog's mom is named Red.  Her friend James looked half her age.

There are some who, seeing the difficult situation in which the woman lived, might have felt uncomfortable surrendering the dog.  But there were three things that made it a no-brainer for me.  One, it's not my dog.  I would hate for someone to find one of my dogs & then tell me I couldn't have him back because they somehow didn't like my lifestyle or the circumstances in which I lived.  Two, the dog was so very excited to see her again.  He almost flew into her arms - & she confirmed that she carried him everywhere.  & three, Red herself explained her unpleasant living situation - which may have been the reason he escaped in the first place - & it seemed to me that Bojingles was one of the few joys in her current predicament.

My wife & I were masked, but no one else at that place was, so, after briefly trying to impress upon Red & James that Bojingles should be neuters & microchipped - Red said she was told he was! - we said goodbye to that little darling & left the uncomfortable situation.  I missed him immediately & miss him still.  When we walk near where we found him - or where he found us - I look around for him.

The neighbor who was willing to adopt him has gone the extra mile & has spoken with Red.  She told me that tomorrow they are taking him to be microchipped, although I am not certain her current address is going to be any kind of permanent address.  I can't complain, though - she's doing more than I have offered to do.

When I lived in Fort Worth, we saw stray dogs regularly.  We saw dogs who lived nearly alone in backyards, always there, even in the Texas heat.  Here in Portland dogs are treated like the family members they surely are.  Bojingles was literally the first stray I've seen in almost two years of living here.

& I truly hope he'll be okay.  What little I have read about party terriers is that they love to be with their owners in the exact same way Red carries Bojingles with her.  I am sorry this story doesn't end on a happier note - like me adopting Bojingles!  But I take a small amount of consolation from the fact that I did get him home.  Which is a success of a sort.

There's A Story About This Little Guy

That I want to tell but I've run out of time today!  But here's a teaser: a week ago today, he approached us, with no owner in sight.  He followed us for a bit, but when he seemed to be going in a different direction, I snatched him up & brought him to our house.  The search began for his family!  But that story has to wait till tomorrow.

Self Help Radio 040621: Sunflower

One last sunflower picture from me.  The original was called "sunflower shrine," it's from some private garden I walked past one day in southeast Portland.  I kinda liked the weird structures the flowers were growing around.  It's not a very good picture, but look at all the sunflowers!

Vera Nazarian said, "Never look directly at the sun, instead look at the sunflower."  But Edna Ferber said, "Big doesn't necessarily mean better. Sunflowers aren't better than violets."  Wait, didn't Edna Ferber write a book called So Big?  Hypocrite.  Anyway.  Let's not concentrate on what's bigger or better, let's just look at sunflowers.  Which is what we did on this week's Self Help Radio.

There are no sunflowers out as I speak, they're all in seeds waiting to grow when the days get longer & warmer.  I don't believe in magic spells but this show could be seen as a magic spell to hasten the days when the sunflowers dominate the gardens & tower over everything.  I'll think of this show when that happens.  Until then, I'll probably forget all about it.

Did you hear?  If not, you can listen in two different places: at the KBOO website; & at Self Help Radio dot net.  If you choose the latter, remember these two things: the username is SHR, the password is selfhelp.  There are so many songs & so many things that happened on the show, you'll have to look below to see the details.  But remember: don't lose the florist for the flowers!

Self Help Radio Sunflower Show

"Sunflower" Frank Sinatra _The Columbia Years 1943-1952: The Complete Recordings_

"Sunflower" The Springfields _Singles 1986-1991_

"Sunflower" Smack Dab _Queen Crab_

introduction & definitions

"Sunflower" Glen Campbell _The Glen Campbell Collection (1962-1989): Gentle On My Mind_

"Sunflower" Paul Weller _Wild Wood_

"Sunflower" Lovesick _It's The Cheap Damaged Goods Sampler CD_

"Sunflower" Toni Price _Talk Memphis_

"Sunflower" Alice Peacock _Who I Am_

interview with artist Henry O'Rourke

"Sunflower" Eric Elder _Mixed Up Minds Part Seven (Obscure Rock & Pop From The British Isles 1969-1974)_

"Sunflower (Version Anglaise De Ah Tournesol)" Kate & Anna McGarrigle _La Vache Qui Pleure_

"Sunflower" Low _Things We Lost In The Fire_

"Sunflower" The Courteeners _Concrete Love (Extra Love)_

"Sunflower" Mercury Rev _The Light In You_

Marge Most interviews television host Dame Drear Hannah Frothington-Jones

"Sunflower In The Snow" Bubblegum Lemonade _Laz Christmas_

"Sunflower Seeds" The Orielles _Silver Dollar Moment_

"The Sunflower Sutra" Allen Ginsberg _Howls, Raps, & Roars: Recordings From The San Francisco Poetry Renaissance_

"Sunflower Suit" Buffalo Tom _Buffalo Tom_

"Morning Sunflower" The Dirty Filthy Mud _The Forest Of Black_

'Dramatic Readings Of Classic Rock Songs' featuring Sir Archibald Von Poesy

"I'd Like That" XTC _Apple Venus Volume 1_

"Sunflower Sutra" The Babe Rainbow _The Babe Rainbow_

"Sunfish, Sunflower" The Mommyheads _Coming Into Beauty_

"Sunflower" Vampire Weekend _Father Of The Bride_

"Day Of The Sunflowers (We March On)" Basement Jaxx _Scars_

Let's take some calls (part one)

"Pyzate Stoneczniki (Chubby Sunflowers)" Novi Singers _Bossa Nova_

"Sunflower, Sunflower" P.F. Sloan _Here's Where I Belong_

"You Missed The Sunflowers At Their Height" Linda Thompson _Give Me A Sad Song_

"Sunflower Man" The Waifs _The Waifs_

"In Every Sunflower" Bell X1 _Music In Mouth_

"Sunflower" Le Futur Pompiste _Your Stories & Your Thoughts_

Let's take some calls (part two)

"Tournesol" Yves Montand _Yves Montand_

"Le Tournesol" Nana Mouskouri _Le Tournesol_

"Il Girasole" Simone Lo Porto _Italia_

"Girasole" Farabrutto _Estremoriente Mediocre Occidente_

"Girasol Rojo" ...Al Cruzar La Calle _Ashell II_

"Girasol" Lightships _Electric Cables_

Conclusion & goodbye

"Little Sunflower" Freddie Hubbard _The Love Connection_

"Sunflower (feat. Leah Zeger)" Scott Bradlee's Postmodern Jukebox _Sepia Is The New Orange_

Whither Sunflower?

This week's Self Help Radio celebrates the sunflower.  Perhaps only second to the rose as the most recognizable of flowers.  & in my native Texas, there would be a time - perhaps after mid-summer but certainly before what passes for fall - when sunflowers would spring up everywhere.  But even in Portland, where sun is not nearly as common in poor, desertifying Texas, sunflowers crowd into gardens as the summer turns to autumn.  They are striking.

& when you find out that young sunflowers turn to follow the sun?  That's some true nature magic right there.  It makes sense that it's a flower that has found its way into song - & of course you'll hear lots of sunflower songs tonight, should you listen.

But why a show about sunflowers?  I noticed I took a lot of pictures of sunflowers - like the one above - last fall.  & I thought, since it was fresh on my mind, I should do a show about sunflowers.  & so I shall!

Self Help Radio's Sunflower show happens tonight (or Tuesday morning) from midnight to 3am on 90.7 fm KBOO Portland, online at kboo.fm.  It'll be the regular amount of good tunes & ridiculousness.  But there will also be pretty flowers & delicious seeds!

Preface To Sunflower: My Favorite Sunflower Pic

Of the ones I've taken, I mean.  I call this "Sunflower & Moon."

This weekend was chaotic for me & I have a story to tell about a stray but it'll have to wait until after the sunflower show!

What? More Pics Of Sunflowers?

It's true.  That's what the show's about this week.  So here are some more photos I've taken of this most photogenic plant.

The first is from Texas, just sunflowers growing wild along the road.  The last two are from here in Portland, taken last year.  The final picture - perhaps you can tell - is a sunflower that was as big as my head.  I thought it might fall on me as a I wandered under it.

Someone Sure Takes A Lot Of Pictures Of Sunflowers

It's true!  I love sunflowers, I love to look at them, & they're very photogenic!

You might know that I post my amateurish photographs over at the Self Help Radio Tumblr Page.  I started the Tumblr blog & didn't know what to use it for, so I just started putting pictures I took there.

Anyway, I thought I'd share some sunflower pictures here that I might have posted there.  Like these three from many years ago:

Maybe I'll post more tomorrow?

Self Help Radio 033021: Cinnamon

(original image here*)

"Nice Spicy Show" someone texted during last night/this morning's Self Help Radio, & believe you me it wasn't the only spice pun made during all three hours of show's exploration of cinnamon.  There was so much cinnamon on the Self Help Radio cinnamon show we are obligated to remind you of the six side effects of an excess of cinnamon: liver damage, risk of cancer, mouth sores, low blood sugar, breathing problems, & problems interacting with certain medications.  So for the love of Pete, please listen carefully!

The show in at the Self Help Radio website (you can also listen if you want on the KBOO Self Help Radio page).  There will be a username & password required at selfhelpradio.net - they are SHR & selfhelp respectively.  Lots of music happened on the show & other stuff too - that's detailed below.

Take the Self Help Radio cinnamon challenge!  Listen to three hours of songs about cinnamon!

Self Help Radio Cinnamon Show

"Cinnamon" Derek _1968: Blowin' Your Mind_

"Cinnamon" Comateens _Pictures On A String_

"Cinnamon" Wild Strawberries _Bet You Think I'm Lonely_

introduction & definitions

"Cinnamon" Grifters _Crappin' You Negative_

"Cinnamon" The Long Winters _When I Pretend To Fall_

"Cinnamon" Airiel _Airiel EP_

"Cinnamon" Picnic _The Weather's Fine_

"Cinnamon" Marika Hackman _Sugar Blind EP_

interview with the Rev Dr Howard Gently

"Cinnamon Girl (Live At The Cellar Door)" Neil Young _Live At The Cellar Door_

"Sassafrass & Cinnamon" The Glitterhouse _Color Blind_

"Sons & Daughters" The Decemberists _The Crane Wife_

"Cinnamon Girl" Prince _Musicology_

"Cinnamon" Palehound _Dry Food_

interview with Hollywood reporter Denver Smith

"Cinnamon Blonde" Martin Newell _A Summer Tamarind_

"Susie Cinnamon" Damien Youth _Sunfield_

"Cinnamon Road" Shawn Colvin _These Four Walls_

"Cinnamon Tree" Esperanza Spalding _Radio Music Society_

"Tea With Cinnamon" Katzenjammer _Le Pop_

interview with Self Help Radio's resident apothecary Barney Fisher

"Sally Cinnamon" The Stone Roses _The Complete Stone Roses_

"Cinnamon Garden" Poison Girls _Statement_

"The Hills Of Cinnamon" The Lilac Time _Return To Us_

"Cinnamon Roll" Jad Fair & R. Stevie Moore _FairMoore_

"Cinnamon Sky" Harriet Brown _Mall Of Fortune_

interview with the Very Old Historian

"Cinnamon Sinner" Tony Bennett _His Greatest Hits & Finest Performances_

"Flor De Canela (Cinnamon Flower)" Yma Sumac _Fuego Del Ande_

"Cravo E Canela" MPB-4 _Brazil Bossa Beat! (Bossa Nova & The Story Of Elenco Records, Brazil)_

"Cinnebon" Jim Gaffigan _The Last Supper_

"Like Cinnamon" Math & Physics Club _Lived Here Before_

"Cinnamon Baby" The Wave Pictures _Susan Rode The Cyclone_

idioms with cinnamon

"I Saw Cinnamon" Dressy Bessy _Sound Go Round_

"Cinnamon Roll" The Crack Pipes _Snakes In My Veins_

"Cinnamon Winter" Cinderpop _A Lesson In Science_

"Cinnamon Square" The Moovees _Cinnamon Square_

"Cinnamon Cinder (It's A Very Nice Dance)" The Pastel Six _The Downey Story: Landlocked_

"Cinnamon Sound System" His Name Is Alive _Rare Tracks In The Snow_

conclusion & goodbye

"Rock & Roll Cinnamon Tree" Maggie Sue Wimberly _Feel Like Rockin': Tennessee Rock & Roll_

"Cinnamon Cindy" Jimmy Gilmer _The Best Of The Rest Of The Fireballs' Vocals (featuring Jimmy Gilmer)_

"Cinnamint Shuffle (Mexican Shuffle)" The Johnny Mann Singers _Cinnamint Shuffle (Mexican Shuffle)_

"Cinnamon Grahams" Death By Chocolate _Zap The World_

"Cinnamon Smiles" Liar's Club _Drop Dead_

* "Cinnamon - Spice Related (Free stock photo)" by trophygeek is licensed under CC BY 2.0

Whither Cinnamon?

(Image from this article on cnn.com)

Why a radio show about cinnamon? Did you read that article linked above? "'I think the strongest evidence lies so far with diabetes & the promise of cinnamon & blood sugar control,' Lauri Wright, a spokeswoman for the Academy of Nutrition & Dietetics, said, pointing to studies in test tubes & mice & even small studies in people showing that cinnamon helps with insulin sensitivity & glucose transport while decreasing inflammation."

Did you hear that?  Insulin sensitivity & glucose transport while also decreasing inflammation?!?  Isn't that enough to justify a three-hour radio show?!?

All right then.  You can listen to Self Help Radio's show about cinnamon tonight (Monday night) or tomorrow (Tuesday morning) if you prefer from midnight to 3am on 90.7 fm KBOO, online at kboo dot fm.  It's three hours of cinnamon songs, interviews, & other stuffs.  & it'll smell really, really good.

Preface To Cinnamon: Cinnamon Challenge

Check this shiz out: "The cinnamon challenge is a viral internet food challenge. The premise of the challenge is that one films themself eating a spoonful of ground cinnamon in under 60 seconds without drinking anything, with the video being uploaded to the internet as evidence."

Cool, thanks Wikipedia!  Oh no, you're going to be a downer aren't you: "The challenge is difficult & carries substantial health risks because the cinnamon coats & dries the mouth & throat, resulting in coughing, gagging, vomiting, & inhalation of cinnamon, which can in turn lead to throat irritation, breathing difficulties, & risk of pneumonia or a collapsed lung."

Collapsed lung?!?  You can read more at the Wikipedia.  I paid almost no attention to this & very little even now as I'm about to do a show about cinnamon.  Like that ice bucket thing, I thought this was recent but the Wikipedia says different:

"The challenge has been described online since 2001, & increased in popularity in 2007, peaking abruptly in January 2012 & falling off almost as sharply through the first half of that year, then tapering off almost to its previous level by 2014. By 2010, many people had posted videos of themselves attempting this challenge on YouTube & other social networking websites. At the peak, Twitter mentions reached nearly 70,000 per day."

People are weird.  Also, the phrase "viral internet food challenge" is concerning.

One thing I don't know is if Blogger lets you post animated gifs.  Maybe it does, I don't know.  But I'm not going to post any.  Instead, I'll point you to this page of animated gifs related to the cinnamon challenge.  Minutes of fun for the entire family!

Possum

This picture was taken (by me) four years ago today.  I called it "possum" although there are two possums in the picture (that we can see).  It's a mother & her child.  It was taken in my backyard in Fort Worth, & I was alerted to the strangeness of a nocturnal animal like a possum awake during the day & wandered across a wire by my dog Pauline, who totally lost her shit & got everyone in the house as excited as she was.

It wasn't the first time a possum showed up in our yard, & the other times Pauline & also Yoko attacked the poor marsupial.  & it surely played possum.  I was able to wrangle the dogs back into the house, & checked back later.  The possum the dogs thought they'd dispatched?  Gone.

Films With Tourists!

(image from the IMDb.)

This week's Self Help Radio not only featured tons of songs about tourism, it also featured another delightful installment of Chuck's Happily Unsophisticated Cinema Korner in which our resident cinephile explored some films tagged both "tourists" along with "psychotronic"*.  The segment aired on the show - did ya miss it? - no matter, you can listen again at either at Self Help Radio dot net or at kboo dot fm.  Or both, if you're some kind of oddball & you can get them to synch up at the same time.

If you do listen, Chuck has very kindly prepared some supplemental materials for you:

Here's a list of movies on the IMDb tagged with "tourist" & psychotronic.
Here is Chuck's YouTube playlist of movies he talked about featuring tourists.
Here are his Letterboxd reviews of the tourist films.

We didn't get to it, because time, but Chuck also has a couple of links about spring break films (he's so topical):

List of Spring Break films.
YouTube Spring Break playlist.

Want to know what films Chuck is watching right now?  What he may talk about the next time he's on the show?  Keep an eye on his Twitter feed!  Maybe you can watch right along with him!

Can one be a tourist on Twitter?  Holy smokes I hope not.

*If you need a definition of 'psychotronic,' try this link: toward a definition of psychotronic film. 

Self Help Radio 032321: Tourism

(original image here*)

How is tourism doing in the age of Covid-19?  Not well, says this report.  Countries that rely upon tourism as a primary source of revenue (if not the primary source of revenue) say they may never recover from a year in which no one got to be a tourist.  Worry not, Barbados & Seychelles!  Self Help Radio is here to give your nations & others like yours a much needed boost!

Yes, Self Help Radio's show about tourism, which aired last night on the mighty KBOO, & was listened to by at the very least one person (who texted me during the show), has brought much-needed perspective & clarity to everyone's attitudes about tourism.  Yes, if the show did what it meant to do, or even if it didn't, especially since it's not entirely sure what it meant to do, your economies will soon be recovered & you'll be welcoming back those precious tourist dollars.  I mean, the vaccine will help.  But Self Help Radio will push you over the edge!

Hear for yourself: listen to the show at the KBOO website or at the Self Help Radio website.  If you choose the latter, you'll need a username (SHR) & a password (selfhelp).  Lots of stuff happened during the show, including tons of songs, they'll noted below.

The next time you go on a packaged tour, tell 'em Self Help Radio sent you!

Self Help Radio Tourism Show

"The Tourist" The Jags _Evening Standards_

"Tourist" Daddy Caddy _Root Song Book Vol. No. 1_

"Tourist" Julian Casablancas _Phrazes For The Young_

introduction & definitions

"Tourist Boys" Rachel Sweet _The Akron Compilation_

"Heikki's Suburbia Bus Tour" Rodriguez _Coming From Reality_

"Travel Agent" Monty Python _Monty Python's Previous Record_

"Tourist Attraction" The Death Army _Tourist Attraction/Storm Troop 7"_

"Misguided Tour" Skelocrats _No Exceptions_

interview with Hollywood tour guide Denver Smith

"Self Guided Tours" Black Marble _It's Immaterial_

"Tourists" The Intelligence _Vintage Future_

"Totally Tourist" Nels Cline _The Patio Collection Volume 2_

"Case Study: Smithsonian Audio Tours I" Superego _Superego, Vol. 3, Episode 2_

"Tourist Trap" White Rabbits _Fort Nightly_

interview with my youngest friends Alyssa & Jason

"Safe European Home" The Clash _Clash On Broadway_

"Tourist Season" Ringo _Woman A Ginal_

"Directions For Tourists" Todd Barry _Super Crazy_

"At Home He's A Tourist" Gang Of Four _Entertainment!_

"The Tourist" Lady June _Lady June's Linguistic Leprosy_

interview with the most famous tourist in America, Colonel Gerard Jeffries

"Tour Of The World" Damon & Naomi _The Wondrous World Of Damon & Naomi_

"The Lowly Tourist" Loudon Wainwright III _Unrequited_

"Strange Tourist" Fairmont _Liminal Spaces_

"Tourist Information" Tours _Album Of The Year... (That Never Was)_

"English Tourists" Ruck Rover _Good People's Highway_

another installment of Chuck's Happily Unsophisticated Cinema Korner with Chuck talking about movies featuring tourists

"Dreadlock Holiday" 10cc _Bloody Tourists_

"Tourist Trap" Sam Roberts Band _TerraForm_

"Case Study: The Cobblefax Abbey Bus-Along New England Ghost Tour" Superego _Superego Vol. 3, Episode 5_

"Like A Tourist" Of Montreal _False Priest_

"Tourist Town" Marti Jones _Used Guitars_

"Miss Tourist" Lord Kitchener _Klassic Kitchener Volume Two_

our regular idioms segment

"I Hate Tourists" The Freeze _I Hate Tourists_

"Looking For The Tour Guide" The Aggregation _Mind Odyssey_

"Pastel Tourist" Sixteens _Into The Gold Wave Of Future Non Rip-Off!_

"Tourist UFO" Boston Spaceships _Let It Beard_

"The Tortoise & The Tourist" Modest Mouse _Strangers To Ourselves_

"Sky Tourism" The Academy Of Sun _The Quiet Earth_

conclusion & goodbye

"Case Study: The Gorsock Murder Tour" Superego _Superego, Vol. 4, Episode 2_

"7:30 Guided Tour" The Five Americans _The Best Of The Five Americans_

"Tourists From Timenotyet" The Steppes _Destination: Bomp!_

* "The Tourists" by Phil Roeder is licensed under CC BY 2.0

Whither Tourism?

(image from here)

That delightful image above - I'm sorry there's not a bigger version! - is from an article called "Tourism Is Four Times Worse For The Planet That Previously Believed."  The article is from 2018, so I'm almost certain it does not mean this week's episode of Self Help Radio.

As I mentioned on the blog yesterday, I either never knew or kind of forgot that tourism is considered something negative.  Not that it would have stopped me from doing a show about the subject.  In the early days of my show, there was a caller in Austin who seemed irked my themes weren't more happy.  I think in the summer of 2004 I actually did a show with the theme "happy" but it didn't please her.  She called later & said, "I couldn't shake the feeling you were doing the theme ironically."

Not so tourism!  We're going all in!  It'll happen tonight on 90.7 KBOO - & online at kboo.fm - from midnight to 3am.  I think I have five guests on the show with four interviews!  It's jam packed.  Like one of those tour buses when they've overbooked.  Oh.  I am beginning to see how tourism gets its bad reputation.

Preface To Tourism: Packaged Tours

Just a moment ago I was getting some samples from this odd YouTube video & it made me wonder if, when I traveled, I was a traveler or a tourist.  For example, it says that travelers eat the local cuisine, while tourists seek out stuff that is familiar (I guess, like fast food from an international chain).  It also says that travelers strike out on their own, while tourists go on tours with other tourists.

But what if you're a mixture of the two?  I don't eat fast food in the States, why would I eat it abroad?  But I also don't mind a tour if I think it might be fun - like the ones we took in Edinburgh & in Sydney.  There was no chance of us renting a car in the short amount of time we had so hopping on a tour bus was the best option available to see large parts of the area.  But before & after that, we explored both cities mostly by foot.  I remember looking at my health app on my iPhone at the end of the day in Edinburgh & I had walked like ten miles & had over twenty thousand steps.

One supposes that "tourist" has negative connotations, which I hadn't considered when I thought about doing this show.  I also found myself remembering I had done shows previously about holidays as well as travel, & of course the recent souvenirs*.  They all seem to be of a piece with one another.  I guess they could all be some mega-radio show, over eight hours long.  A workday of radio about travel!

Anyway, the point is, except for a couple of snotty songs, I don't think this week's Self Help Radio will look down upon the tourist.  Not intentionally.  Because I don't think, generally, you're simply one or the other - I think you're often a mixture of both.  At least by the definitions in that odd YouTube video.  At least for me.

* One of my collaborators, Jon, made me feel bad about having a show about tourism so soon after souvenirs, so I delayed the show for three weeks.

Bidnessman

This picture was taken (by me) seven years ago today.  I called it "bidnessman."  It was taken in Atlanta - I'm not entirely sure why we were in Atlanta but we were.  Our hotel was nearby.  We were walking the dogs, & I saw this fellow walking in front of us.  I can't entirely be sure, but I believe the business he was walking in front of was some murky sex establishment advertising "live models."  I would never go in a place like that.  But I would stare at the facade & wonder what the hell actually went on there.

Now I'm puzzled why I was in Atlanta.  Maybe just to get away?  It was only six hours from where I lived at the time.  I quite like Atlanta.  So maybe just to go to Atlanta.  Our three beagles did come with us, of course.

Films With Daggers!

(Those are swords, not daggers!  Image from the IMDb.)

This week's Self Help Radio not only featured tons of songs about daggers, it also had another installment of Chuck's Happily Unsophisticated Cinema Korner in which our resident cinephile explored some films tagged both "daggers" along with "psychotronic"*.  You can listen to Chuck's segment on the episode both at Self Help Radio dot net & at kboo dot fm, & if you do, he has some supplemental materials for you:

Here's a list of movies on the IMDb tagged with "daggers" & psychotronic.
Here is Chuck's YouTube playlist of movies he's watched.
Here are his Letterboxd reviews of the dagger films.

As always, you can keep up with the films Chuck is watching on his Twitter feed - he'll let you know what films he'll discuss the next time he's on the show!  Just maybe stay away from him if he's got a dagger out.  He's not that good with daggers.  We're just saying.

*If you need a definition of 'psychotronic,' try this link: toward a definition of psychotronic film.

Self Help Radio 031621: Daggers

(original image here*)

No programmers were harmed in the making of this radio show about daggers.  Though it does depend on what is meant by "harmed."  Were daggers quite unsafely wielded, waved about, tossed, & playfully pointed at people in a "pretending to stab" manner?  Yes.  Did the sometime mishandling of the daggers result in nicks, cuts, slices, & in one unfortunate case, a small tip of finger removed?  Oh sure.  Was there enough blood to cause at least one person to feel woozy although not to downright faint?  Indeed.  But did anyone really feel harmed by any of it?  No, they did not!  Although getting sliced by a weapon with two sharp edges really stings!

But in the wee hours of the morning - or in the early hours of the dark of night - daggers were drawn on Self Help Radio, & songs were sung of daggers, & everyone felt quite ancient & in touch with our ancestors who carved daggers, who used them in the ritual as well as the hunt, & who quite frankly had as many accidents with them as we did on the show.  But did they feel "harmed"?  How dare you ask!

Please enjoy the show in either of two places: at its home on the KBOO web page, or at Self Help Radio dot net.  If you go to the Self Help Radio web page, remember that you'll need a username (which is SHR) & a password (which is selfhelp) to listen.  Lots of stuff happened on the show - the music & the other stuff is noted below.

Now to a station-mandated dagger safety class!

Self Help Radio Daggers Show

"Dagger" Slowdive _Souvlaki_

"Dagger" Emily Jane White _Dark Undercoat_

"Dagger" Bernard + Edith _Jem_

introduction & definitions

"The Dagger" Burning Palms _False Prophet_

"Dagger" Madisyn Whajne _Save Our Hearts_

"Daggers" Ian Moore _Modernday Folklore_

"Daggers" The Blueskies _Souvenir_

"Daggers" Fujiya & Miyagi _Artificial Sweeteners_

interview with dagger safety expert Garth Bell

"Daggers" Ex Cops _Daggers_

"Daggers" The Family Crest _The War: Act I_

"Daggers" Prism Tats _Mamba_

"Daggers & Knives" Woodes _The Thaw_

"Dagger Moon" Dead Moon _Defiance_

interview with archaeologist Dr. Daniel Black

"Silver Dagger" Joan Baez & Bob Dylan _Live 1964 (Concert At Philharmonic Hall)_

"Dance Around The Daggers" Joseph Huber _Tongues Of Fire_

"Dagger Through The Heart" Dolly Parton _Halos & Horns_

"Dagger By My Side" Otis Taylor _Pentatonic Wars & Love Songs_

"Skull & Dagger" Luke Baldwin _The Tattoo On My Chest_

Chuck joins us with Chuck's Highly Unsophisticated Cinema Korner to talk about movies featuring daggers

"Dolly Dagger" Jimi Hendrix _Blue Wild Angel (Jimi Hendrix Live At The Isle Of Wight)_

"Looking Daggers" Smokie _The Complete Smokie Collection_

"Tiny Daggers" INXS _Kick_

"Chelsea Dagger" The Fratellis _Costello Music_

"Jagger The Dagger" Eugene McDaniels _Headless Heroes Of The Apocalypse_

idioms!

"Cloak & Dagger" The Echoes _Are You Sure - Great British Record Labels: Fontana_

"Cloak & Dagger" Tommy McCook & The Upsetters _Scratch The Upsetter: Cloak & Dagger_

"Cloak & Dagger" Rory Gallagher _Photo-Finish_

"Cloak & Dagger Man" Camel _Lunar Sea (An Anthology 1973-1985)_

"Cloak & Dagger" Daedelus _A Gent Agent_

"Cloak & Dagger" Eight Legs _Best Of Me_

Marge Most reports

"Richie Dagger's Crime" The Germs _(MIA) The Complete Anthology_

"Looking Daggers" Eyeless In Gaza _Photographs As Memories_

"The Dagger In Me" The Hands Of Cain _The Only Sound_

"City Of Daggers" Controller.Controller _X-Amounts_

"Wits Or A Dagger" Wolf Parade _Wolf Parade EP_

"Little Dagger" Smack Dab _Majestic Root_

conclusion & goodbye

"Dagger" The Hope Blister _...Smile's OK_

"Dagger II" White Ring _B-Sides_

*"Dagger & Scabbard" by greyloch is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

Whither Daggers?

(image from here)

You might think that a theme such as daggers -  which is the theme of tonight's Self Help Radio on KBOO - would have been inspired by a thrilling event, like a inadvertent knife-throwing contest, or a chance encounter with a dagger-wielding thief, or involvement with an ancient cult whose ceremonial dagger has fallen into the hands of evil people.  You might believe some blood was spilled, or some risks taken.  But you would be wrong.  Not to be so romantic - that's fine.  But to have thought that about this theme.  No, there was a song about daggers that I liked & I wondered if it would make a good show.  I found enough songs & here we are.

How underwhelming!  How un-dagger-like!  Maybe it's a bit cloak & dagger - except it isn't.

Listen tonight from midnight to 3am to Self Help Radio's show about daggers.  It's on 90.7 fm in town & online at kboo.fm.  & who knows?  Like a dagger, it may be sharp, ornate, deadly, &/or carved.  Except it won't be.  It's a radio program.

Preface To Daggers: Wait, Daggers?

Look, I know most of Self Help Radio makes no sense.  Around 2006, a KOOP volunteer named Abigail reviewed my show for the station's peer review process & correctly asked, "Why does the show pick the topics it picks?  What is the point?"  It was a completely valid question & the answer is for the most part, "It just does."

Something has happened, however, since Self Help Radio has expanded to three hours.  I am the first to say that I never imagined the show to be three hours long.  Two hours is to me the appropriate length.  & I know that was the length of the show on Freeform, but KBOO has more listeners, & I suppose I am a glutton for punishment, I want the show to be rejected & disdained by as many listeners as possible.  But moving the show to KBOO meant I had to do the show for three hours.  & so.

Two options present themselves.  One, pick very broad topics - like "spring" or "cars" or "colors" - which will give you so many fucking choices you'll be listening to songs for days & days.  Almost certainly this would be "the easy way out" - since there are so many songs to fit that general theme - but it would also mean more time spent listening to music.  Which isn't itself bad.  There are just so many hours in the day.

What I have gravitated toward, actually, is narrower themes.  Themes that just might not fill three hours.  Because, & I want to make this clear, I don't just happily play songs that fit the show's themes.  I play songs that I like which fit the show's theme.  I have a folder which has hours & hours of songs about birthdays, which I might play on the annual birthday show I do for my wife.  But so many of those songs I just find execrable.  I don't like them.  Why would I play them on my show?  I would not.  I do not.

That becomes the challenge.  Can I fill three hours with songs about a theme which happen to be songs I like?  So far, so good.  I think I have enough entertaining & catchy dagger songs for this week's show.  But I want to stress: only just enough.  This was not an easy theme.

There were some (in my opinion) pretty awful dagger songs I couldn't play.  I won't play.  In case you think I am literally throwing everything out there.  No.  No.  If I were a more dickish person, I might list them.  But no.

Nest Builder

This picture was taken (by me) four years ago today.  I called it "nest builder."  It was spring in Fort Worth, & the birds were out.  I am not very good at the nature photography, but I managed to snap this mockingbird on its way to its nest, which was in a tree in the backyard next to mine.

At least I think it's a mockingbird.  It is, isn't it?  I'm not an ornithologist.  Nor am I terribly proficient at bird names.  Anyway.  It's something I know I did exactly four years ago.  & I can barely remember what I did yesterday.

One Year Ago Today

One year ago today was the last time I was in a radio studio broadcasting live.  I've done both live & recorded shows since then, but all from my home.  I did an episode of The Dickenbock Report on the morning of Thursday, March 12, 2020.  This is what the studio looked like, basically:

That picture was taken in 2019, but I'm sure it looks pretty much as it did that morning.  I miss it more than I can say.

For the first few months of the pandemic I was so angry.  I would get furious when people wore their masks wrong, I would seethe at stories of patrons at places refusing to wear a mask, & of course I was livid at the government for doing fuck-all to stop the spread of the disease.  & it didn't take Sigmund Freud to figure out that I was angry at all that because it was keeping my from radio.  It's my favorite thing, it's the thing I love doing best, even if I'm honestly not that good at it.

Here's hoping we're back there soon.  How lonesome it looks up there!

Self Help Radio 030921: Victory!

(Original image here.*)

At long last, a victory for Self Help Radio!  Oh, it may be a temporary victory - or more likely a Pyrrhic victory - but after the year we've had, this show will take what it can get.

Yes, this week Self Help Radio - almost certainly the losingest show in the history of radio - celebrated victory after victory.  It may have seemed hard-fought, but really it was just a bunch of songs.  & also a couple of interviews.  & also way too much silliness.

Listen if you need a little victory in your life at the show's website.  Remember that you'll need a username & a password to listen.  All the stuff that happened on the show is below.

Congrats on your victory!

Self Help Radio Victory Show

"Victory" Curtis Mayfield _Heartbeat_
"Victory" PJ Harvey _Dry_
"Victory" The Walkmen _Lisbon_

introduction & definitions

"Paths Of Victory" Odetta _Odetta Sings Dylan_

"Sweeter The Victory" Gregory Isaacs _In Person_

"Till Victory" Patti Smith Group _Easter_

"Just One Victory" Todd Rundgren _A Wizard, A True Star_

"A Relatively Famous Victory" Ballboy _I Worked On The Ships_

interview with the Rev Dr Howard Gently (part one)

"Forces Of Viktry" Linton Kwesi Johnson _Forces Of Victory_

"Sansa (Victory Song)" Yma Sumac _Legend Of The Jivaro_

"Victory" News From Babel _Sirens & Silences/Work Resumed On The Tower_

"There's No Such Thing As Victory" Felt _The Final Resting Of The Ark_

"Another Victory" Big Daddy Kane _It's A Big Daddy Thing_

interview with the Rev Dr Howard Gently (part two)

"Celebrate Your Victory" The Shirelles _Lost & Found (Rare & Previously Unissued)_

"The Last Performance Of The Royal Regimental Very Victorious & Valiant Band" The Syn _Original Syn (1967-69)_

"Haggling Victory" Adam Newman _Not For Horses_

"Victory Horns" Strange Parcels & Jesse Rae _Pay It All Back (Volume 4)_

"Victory (Remix)" Caveman _Positive Reaction_

interview with writer Victoria Verbena

"Victory" Three Finger Cowboy _Kissed_

"Victory Lane" Komeda _KoKoMeMeDaDa_

"Victory Rally" Pat Paulsen _Pat Paulsen For President_

"Victory Is Mine" Sounds Of Blackness _The Apostle (Music From & Inspired By The Motion Picture)_

"Road To Victory (feat. Hugh Augustine & Alex Nester)" The Urban Renewal Project _21st Century Ghost_

interview with spelling bee victor Andy Nominous nope!

"Rare Victory" The Go-Betweens _G Stands For Go-Betweens: The Go-Betweens Anthology, Vol. 1_

"Little Victories" Oh, Atoms _You Can't See The Stars From Here_

"Victory Walk" The Boy Bathing _A Fire To Make Preparations_

"Victory Is Coming" Joseph Spence & The Pinder Family _The Spring Of Sixty-Five_

"Chant Jah Victory" Errol Alphonso _Yabby You: Jesus Dread 1972-1977 Volume Two_

"Victory Is Near" Judy Mowatt _Rock Me_

a discussion of idioms using "victory"

"What Price Victory?" The Outcasts _Acid Visions: The Complete Collection, Vol. 2_

"You're The Victor" Q65 _Revolution_

"Victory!" Jay & The Techniques _Apples, Peaches, Pumpkin Pie_

"The Lost Victory" Lilys _The 3 Way_

"Savage Victory" Thee Oh Sees _Drop_

"A Vain Victory" Kissing Party _Looking Back It Was Romantic But At The Time I Was Suffocating_

conclusion & goodbye

"Victory (with Uhuru-Yenzu)" Ebo Taylor _Life Stories (Highlife & Afrobeat Classics 1973-1980)_

"Set The Tone/Victory" Bernie Worrell _Pieces Of Woo: The Other Side_

"A Victory Dance" Julian Cope _Self Civil War_

* "Peace, Victory, Two Fingers - featuring the hand of the originator of the Sustainability Symbol (3 fingers) - Philip McMaster" by Philip McMaster PeacePlusOne_\!/ is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0

Whither Victory?

(image from here)

According to this site, there is a difference between a "victory" & a "win" is this:

"Victory" means that you have been victorious or you have gained in some form of direct competition, as could be a battle. In the beginning this term was only used in the context of wars & battles (now its use is more common & generalized).

"Winning" is can have a more subjective character. To succeed, it does not necessarily require that an opponent be defeated; since the win depends on what is what the person considers success, & success is something quite subjective; everyone has a particular idea about what it is.

One can win by overcoming a fear, being the best in a competition, setting up the business you have always dreamed of, getting the desired job, etc.  But a victory requires one to act directly with regard to the matter you occupy. A win can be achieved by indirect means.

In my opinion, a victory is more impressive than a win.  To win a battle may be a good thing, but to achieve victory in a battle is the stuff of history books.  I mean, they didn't have "WE Day" or "WJ Day" at the end of World War II, did they?  Nope, we didn't just win in Europe & in Japan - we had victory in Europe & in Japan.

Plus, "win" can be both a noun & a verb.  "Victory" can only be a noun.  Also, Self Help Radio has already explored the theme of "winning," almost ten years ago.  I think it was during the dramatic drug-fueled downfall of Charlie Sheen, but no one remembers that guy, not even me.

If you need some victory in your life - some victories - listen to Self Help Radio tonight on 90.7 fm KBOO Portland, online at kboo.fm, from midnight to 3am.  Three hours of victory.  You will emerge victorious!

Preface To Victory: A Lifetime Of Losing

On a dogwalk today I talked to the wife about how my family's insane competitive spirit basically cured me of finding any joy or really anything good in winning, in wanting to win, in competing at all.

My mother, who believed that boys were basically stupid creatures driven by the most base instincts, & who also believed women were superior but flawed because they couldn't get along (or outright despised one another), & who therefore believed women let boys ostensibly run the world because it kept them busy & let women have time to themselves, she favored her sons over her daughters.  She thought her daughters were inherently better & would get by with a minimal amount of attention.  Her sons, however, were weak, inept creatures who need constant attention, much of which (in her mind) was keeping them away from danger.  She made me & my four brothers into consummate cowards by teaching us to fear & avoid conflict.  But!

She also wanted us to believe we were special.  She found a way to make each of us believe that we were her favorite - & not only that, that were somehow better than the others.  I can't say any of this was a conscious decision - my own sense is that she learned almost all of this from her mother - but what ended up happening was that my brothers & I began to see ourselves as rivals for her attention & affection.  For my mother, having five boys fighting over her must have been quite a thrill.  For us, it absolutely destroyed any brotherly feelings we might have for one another - after all, who feels sympathy, empathy, or affection for his antagonist?

For a kid growing up in this milieu - I was the fourth of five children, & my oldest brother was nearly eighteen years older than I was - it led to things I found quite baffling.  I remember playing tennis with my brother Steve, who is eleven years older than I am, when I was just a kid.  I was either in the last years of elementary school or the first years of middle school - let's just say I was eleven.  That meant he was twenty-two.  He was a grown man, naturally better at any sport than I was, & yet he absolutely destroyed me on the tennis court.  His taunting & his aggressive playing reduced me to tears.  He was however full of joy & triumph.  An outsider might judge it one of the happiest moments of his life.

The idea of simply batting a tennis ball around with his much younger brother would never have occurred to him.

Here's another example, with my little brother, who is a year younger than I am.  We lived in apartments & at one point, he & I were the oldest children there.  One autumn afternoon found us playing a game of football on the lawn of a nearby church.  I was probably 13, my brother Chris was 12.  Most of the other kids were 10 or younger.  I wasn't in any way athletic (I never have been) but I was bigger than Chris & able to tackle him.  He found this intolerable, & got the kids to complain I was "too big" to play.  That it was "unfair."  They basically refused to play unless I quit.  As I walked away in a huff, I noticed my brother was now unstoppable, & he ran circles around the other kids.

In both these cases, it's important to note it wasn't a simple game being played; it was a contest, one in which the victor had to be the kind of superior being my mother told us we were.  Cheating & humiliation were never off the table, because winning was everything.

Of course my brothers would disagree completely with this.  But I would point out that most of them never really achieved any real status or lofty goals in life, with the possible exception of reproducing, & their children seem to be fond of them.  But for people who have toiled their entire lives in mostly low-paying jobs, with broken relationships & marriages, with all of them having to return home to live with my mother when life laid them low - they have extraordinary self-esteem.  It's almost supernatural.

It probably seems self-serving to say that somehow I broke the spell.  It was a gradual process, & it involved many experiences, including terrible encounters with competition in school which I found just painful.  Perhaps because I did have outside validation, aside from my mother - I did very well, grade-wise, & my brothers did not (two of them dropped out) - I could look into my family situation from a unique perspective.  But I would recognize in the greedy, desperate way people wanted to win in school functions - from spelling bees to a college-bowl-like group I was in in high school - the same demeanor I saw in my brothers.  & I didn't like it & I want any of that.

Honestly, I don't like the person it turns me into.  Because I know that feeling's in me.

To bring this back to my wife: we used to have friends over for game night.  I found it nice to have people over but my wife was a terrible loser & an even worse winner.  She claims much of it was bravado, & maybe it was, but it reminded me too much of my childhood.  I don't do game night or play games like that anymore.  The few online games I played, I refuse to play with other people, preferring to play the game's AI.  It is a wound my mother left me that just doesn't heal.

So in some ways for me to do a radio show about victory, which is this week's theme, is silly - I don't have any interest in victory.  To my brothers, I am the consummate loser - & certainly luckier than most losers they've known.  Which makes what I've lived a lifetime of losing.  & I have no problem whatsoever with that.

What To Do At This Hour

In case you know what time it is.  If not, time is available on your electronic device.  Which is not to say it's actually time.  It's telling the time.  How weird it would be to not know the time.  Although for most of history most humans didn't know the time.  & if you knew the time & wrote it down, most humans could not have read the time.  We didn't know how to read or how to tell the time.  Most of the time.

It seems like it was important at one time to teach children how to tell the time.  Do they still do that?  Or has that technology gone the way of dialing a telephone?  It seems we should keep analog clocks around just so a child knows how to tell the time - the way at radio stations you should teach an aspiring disc jockey how to play a record even if they just want to use their laptops.

Not to brag, but I know how to tell the time.  & seeing what time it is, I think I might finish this book about swear words I've been reading.  Because I also know how to read.  Imagine that.

Picture Of The Place Where I Currently Live

(I have better pictures of my home but I can't find

them right now, so this is from Google Maps.)

So ends this series of pictures of places I've lived in my little more than a half-century on planet Earth.  This is the 23rd place I've lived in since I was four.  I could probably quiz my family to find out how many places I lived in before that - it's probably three, but it could be two or four - my mother in her old age couldn't really remember, either, that's how chaotic life was at the time with my alcoholic father.

In previous installments, I've made a list of my favorite places to live.  In general, this list is limited to houses we've owned - I don't know if I think about any rental (with the exception of the places on Depew & Red River) as spaces I would call "favorite."  But here is my list of the places we've owned as my favorites:

1. Bal Lake (Fort Worth)

2. Insley (Portland - where I live now)

3. Southbend (Lexington)

4. Ridgemont (Austin)

5. Neel (Huntington)

That appears to be it - oh my! We've owned five houses in around sixteen years!

The reason the Fort Worth house is my favorite is that it was the perfect size for us & for our animals.  It had a lovely back yard & lovely neighbors.  In many ways, my wife designed it for us - she gutted the place & built it up according to her specifications.  She designed the kitchen for me.  She knew where everything needed to be.

She did very much the same for the Lexington house, but it was way too big for us.  Too many rooms, too much space.  I loved the place, but the yard, the house, the space - too big.

Both of those houses also suffered from where they were located: in Fort Worth, in Lexington.  We were never going to be happy there.

The Austin house benefitted from being in Austin - & from my initial belief I'd be living there the rest of my life.  But looking back, while I loved it, I kinda wish we'd had the money to make it closer to my wife' vision - I trust her completely.  & the Huntington house - it was three floors, in a dying city, which held no future for us.

As for where I live now - why is it second?  Portland has been awesome so far (pandemic notwithstanding).  But this house wasn't built for us.  We liked its layout - else we wouldn't have bought it!  & we saw some homes that we thought we'd have to compromise for - some real screwy layouts & that bane of weird purchases, the unfinished basement.  No, the house we currently inhabit feels like we chose it because it's what we like - or at least what my wife likes.

Seriously, when we first saw the house, I was struck by house perfect it was for her - & she acted completely unimpressed.  She later said it was the price that turned her off - but it blinded her to what was the most perfect for her home we had seen as we were looking.  & we almost didn't go see it.  So - had we not gone - had she stuck to her guns & felt it was too expensive - we might be living in a "compromise house" - worried about the weird smell coming from the unfinished basement.

But nope!  This is a good place to live.  & it's my second favorite in my favorite city in which I've lived.  That seems a kind of victory. 

Not that I'm trying to tie this into next week's theme or anything.